The Sentinel's Squire
by N3kkra
Summary: Squire Madelyn Dangerfield is assigned to the Sentinel of the Brotherhood of Steel, Nate. But he's not everything she imagined. Quickly her values are thrown into question, and Madelyn is forced to rethink everything she believes. Throw on top of that a witty ghoul, a flirty merc, and the fact she's not the only one with secrets and you've got a Commonwealth Cocktail. Enjoy!
1. A New Day

Nate rolled out of the bed carelessly, his bare feet hitting the cold metal floor reminded him he had spent the night in his quarters on the Prydwen. He didn't bother opening his eyes, instead, he sat there for a moment letting his body catch up to his brain which was already carefully plotting out his day. He had to meet Hancock outside of the Airport and then they were going to the Castle to speak with Preston. It was probably about a settlement that needed his help. It was _always_ about a settlement that needed his help. After having destroyed the Institute with the help of the Brotherhood of Steel, he'd been promoted and then left to do just about whatever he wanted. He was seen as more of a teller than a doer now, almost like Elder Maxson. Whenever he asked for work here they just told him there was nothing for someone of his status, just work for knights and scribes. This gave him plenty of time to do work for the Minutemen who didn't seem to give two shits that he was not only Sentinel to the Brotherhood of Steel, but also their General. How different the two organizations were.

He couldn't hide his bias all the time, though, Hancock had caught on fairly quickly, but then again, he was a Mentats kind of ghoul making him far more perceptive than he should be. The Brotherhood was everything he'd had before being thrown out of his own time. It was an organized military with specific rules and training with familiar weapons and standards. But their morals were too strong for him. Equality was for pure human kind, even ghouls who were humans and had no choice in their change were seen as abominations.

Nate had made the mistake of bringing Hancock with him onto the Prydwen once before he was promoted to paladin. He'd barely made it off of the vertibird before being surrounded by laser rifles aimed and humming. Now he left Hancock outside the Airport's boarders just to be sure no trigger-happy initiate would accidently shoot the Mayor of Goodneighbor.

So, despite the constant settlement distress, the Minutemen shared more beliefs with Nate, giving them a slightly higher standing on his priority list than the Brotherhood. Not that they seemed to notice.

With a sigh he opened his eyes and stood. Nate stumbled over to his dresser, working out the stiffness in his joints. It was nice to have a large room without holes in it letting in rads and rain, but the room was far plainer than anything he built in the settlements under his care. That was partly because he didn't spend too much of his time here, leaving him no time to add anything but essentials to the room.

He threw on his Brotherhood fatigues and grabbed his sniper rifle, then left the room, pausing just long enough to listen to the automatic lock. The Prydwen looked no different with the Institute destroyed than it had before. The soldiers moved around with their minds on everything but their orders. Normally Nate would head over to the canteen and get something fresh to eat, but Hancock always made a face at the food supplied by the Prydwen. Nate knew that the Brotherhood itself was not bad, just like the prewar military, it's those within it that the people see, and based off of them are the impressions given. One or two rude soldiers can ruin years of trust carefully built up by those soldiers' superiors. And unfortunately the Brotherhood didn't have a preexisting relationship with the Commonwealth that could negate any hard feelings now thrown at them by the settlements that were unlucky enough to be assigned to the soldiers that did not have the same mentality as the Brotherhood. Nate feared the day when one of the settlements under his protection would be contacted by the Brotherhood. He hoped the soldiers that would come were kind and offered compensation to the hard working farms and only took what was needed.

Salutes and Hail Sentinels followed his departure, and he'd almost made it to the vertibird without anyone stopping him. Almost.

"Sentinel," Lancer-Captain Kells's voice rang with a deep, defining tone that could belong to no one else. Nate hid his reaction behind a polite smile and turned to face the man. Kells was only taller than Nate because of his Airship captain's hat. Nate had never given much thought to his size until Vault-Tec had ripped his life away from him. He wasn't the biggest guy in the army, even in his friend group he was nothing special. The wasteland had hardened him though, made his softened muscles hard again, and stole the smooth skin he'd had. But it couldn't take his height, which he learned made him stand out even more since the people of the Commonwealth usually went hungry stunting their growth causing the new average to be several inches shorter. Those who work for the Brotherhood, especially those who started young, didn't see the effect as badly. Only one person had rivaled Nate's size, and he wasn't here anymore.

"Lancer-Captain Kells, what can I do for you?"

"Elder Maxson has ordered me to assign a squire to you," he said, standing with his feet together and his fist over his chest in a salute.

"I, uh," Nate blinked and awkwardly saluted back. "I wasn't aware I was going to be assigned a squire."

"We have a squire who shows great promise, excellent skills, and superior knowledge of her studies when compared to her peers. Elder Maxson and I agree no better mentor for her would be you, Sentinel." Kells had to be some hand full of years older than Nate, but he bled steel just like Elder Maxson did, which earn him Nate's respect. Nate hadn't missed the hateful stares and whispers from some soldiers because of his literal fly through the ranks, achieving in mere months what some couldn't do in decades. Nate was also from a different time, though, and had been away from this sort of life for barely a year, making it all too easy to fall right back into his old habits.

"Why not train her under Elder Maxson?" Nate wondered aloud.

Lancer-Captain Kells stared at him for a moment as if he weren't sure if Nate had actually meant to ask the question. He then responded with, "She is waiting at the Airport for you. Ad Victoriam, Sentinel." Nate nodded returning the battle cry and gave a halfhearted salute that Kells copied before departing.

Nate sighed and mounted the waiting vertibird to take it down to the Airport.


	2. Squire Dangerfield

"Squire Madelyn Dangerfield, reporting for duty!" Nate almost flinched at the voice that assaulted his left ear. Between the vertibird and the gate leaving the compound he'd almost forgotten he was supposed to take on a squire. That was probably because he assumed she would have been closer to the landing pad, and when she wasn't there he'd hoped –secretly– to make his escape. Upon looking down at the miniature Brotherhood soldier saluting him with more vigor than he'd seen in even Elder Maxson, he realized just how much he was going to hate his ranking.

Summoning all of the positive emotions in his body, Nate grinned and saluted the squire back. "At ease, soldier," he laughed. The girl relaxed some, but maintained better posture than he had. "So, how does this work, no one has informed me."

Squire Dangerfield didn't miss a beat, "I am to accompany you as your personal squire, cleaning your armor and reloading your weapons as well as completing other tasks you wish. When you feel I am ready I will also assist you in a fight," she seemed to have added that last part hopefully. Nate wondered if she'd ever carried a weapon. As she spoke she sounded older than he originally thought.

"What is your age?"

"Fifteen, sir–I mean Sentinel." She balled her hands into fists when she made the mistake. Nate looked closely at her. She was short, very short, and with the squire's uniform on she looked no older than twelve.

"How long will you be my squire?"

"Until my training is complete. I have squired for a short time under knights in the past, those only lasting for one mission. Elder Maxson felt that I was ready, despite my age, for a full-time mentor. I could not withhold my excitement when I learned it would be you, Sentinel." She smiled up at Nate with the most genuine grin. Nate couldn't help but actually smile back at her. He could understand the feelings she had, and suddenly he felt bad for trying to skip out on her.

"When will your training be complete?" he asked, he had no intent on doing Brotherhood missions any time soon, so he needed to know how long he was going to tote her around.

"Until you or Elder Maxson feel I am ready to become an Initiate." A fifteen year old becoming an Initiate? He couldn't see that happening and suddenly he feared he would have this girl far longer than just a couple months.

"Okay then, we best get started," he said, turning so that she couldn't see his smile fade into a headache-induced grimace. Nate headed off toward the meeting place that he and Hancock had decided on.

It was an abandoned building with a caved-in roof and a bared door. Millions of them riddled the Commonwealth. But this one was special. There was no way Hancock could have known when he pointed it out saying he would be there when Nate was ready to head out. Two hundred years and a nuclear facial had turned the brick dull and shattered the windows. The black and white checkered tiles on the floor were shattered and almost all missing exposing the ugly concrete underneath. The wallpaper had long since been destroyed, but some of the wood had made it. There was more rubble than anything else, but Nate could picture the old restaurant as if he had been there yesterday, before the war, before the bombs, before time had ruined it.

The front door had been bared so no one could get the jump on Hancock while he was sleeping. It was more so for Nate's sanity than Hancock's paranoia, Lord knows that ghoul never freaked out about anything, real or hallucination. Nate wished he would lay off the drugs, but Hancock wouldn't be Hancock if he were sober.

"What're we doing here, Sentinel?" Squire Dangerfield asked. To be perfectly honest, he'd forgotten she was following him. Her steps were silent and despite the massive rucksack on her back she managed to keep up with him better than Hancock did most of the time.

"We have to meet a friend of mine," he answered and rounded the building. With the windows shattered he was able to look inside. The booths' leather was horrible, and the tabletops were scattered and broken leaving behind the bolted down stands that had rusted to the point that a single touch would turn it to dust. The bar on the far side of the room had been looted and shot at. Stools were missing and thrown around. Even with all of that, Nate saw it just as it had been. When he stepped through a back door using a key they'd found he walked right into the memory.

 _The bright sun burnt Nate's eyes as it glared through the glass windows. He'd had to park behind the building because he was late –as usual– and the street had long since filled up. Nora was sitting at the bar in a sparkling red dress that caught the light in an almost sinful way._

 _She sat with her back to him, her long hair curled and pinned up so that it didn't touch her shoulders. He loved all the hair she had, golden and soft like silk strands between your fingertips when she let you touch it. He didn't have to see her face now to imagine it. She was the definition of beauty with her hazel-green eyes accented with black lines making them stand out against her rosy skin. Her small nose had a pretty curve in the bridge making a gentle point above her uneven lips. It had a cute upper lip that was half the size of the bottom lip, but it looked so right on her. Her small ears were always hidden away in her hair, but always adorned with her birthstone studded earrings._

 _Tears touched his eyes as he stepped up to her, "Nora…"_

 _She turned around setting down her NukaCola Cherry and smiling at him, "I've been waiting here for half an hour, Nate."_

 _"_ _I'm only fifteen minutes late," he objected, his smile growing as he looked at her smirk._

 _"_ _Well, if I'm fifteen minutes early to everything and you're fifteen minutes late, then we should always been on time when we're together, shouldn't we?" She always knew just what to say to him. He loved her with every fiber of his being, and it must have distorted his features because her smile faded into concern. "What's wrong, Nate?"_

 _"_ _Nothing," he said and slowly lowered himself onto his left knee and reached into his pocket. "Not if you say yes, I mean," he added, opening the small black box. He'll never forget the look on her face._

"Ah, there he is, the Savior of the Commonwe– oh." Hancock's arms dropped from the raised position they'd been in to show mock praise. His black eyes were locked on the miniature Brotherhood soldier at Nate's side.

"Sentinel!" Squire Dangerfield shouted, suddenly holding a switchblade she had pulled from one of her many pockets. Hancock responded with grabbing his sawed-off double barrel shotgun and lifting it to point lazily at the girl's head. Nate rubbed his forehead. Of course this would be the reaction.

"Put that away, Hancock, what is she going to do? Poke you to death?" Nate growled at the ghoul who smirked, tucking the shotgun back into his belt. Then he turned on the girl. "Squire Dangerfield!" he put all of his disapproval into his voice which drew her eye.

"But, Sentinel–" she started, her eyes returning to Hancock.

"Look at me," he squared himself on her, stepping between her and the ghoul. She looked up at him and her arm started to shake slightly. "Did I order you to draw your weapon?"

"No, Sentinel." Her grey eyes were locked on his, filled with something that he hadn't seen before. She wasn't afraid that he was going to hurt her, she wasn't even afraid because he was yelling at her. She was afraid of his disappointment.

"Then why is it pointed at my stomach?" Her eyes flicked to her own hand. She seemed surprised to see it was shaking. Then her cheeks brightened with a flush of red.

"I–I apologize, Sentinel," she said, using both hands to close the knife and tuck it away. Her eyes were downcast, stuck staring at a particularly uninteresting piece of tile on the ground some feet away.

"Damn, Nate, never seen you break out your dad face." Hancock's arm draped Nate's shoulders as he came up to his side. Nate was taller than him, which made the pose awkward to start with, but Nate's shoulders were also quite wide, so Hancock's thin arm barely passed his neck. Giving the ghoul a raised look, Nate slowly leaned out of the embrace, feeling a light heat in his stomach that he didn't want to experience with the squire here.

"This is Squire Madelyn Dangerfield, she's been assigned to me until–" he had to stop talking because of the ghoul's laugh, which ripped out of his weathered lips like a force of nature.

"Dangerfield!?" Hancock bent at the waist to lower himself to the short Brotherhood Squire.

"Yes… sir," she said through gritted teeth. Her eyes met Hancock's but her head remained down turned giving her a heavy glare.

"That's enough, Hancock," Nate said, putting his hand firmly on the smaller man's shoulder.

"Ah, don't be like that, Natie," Hancock smirked straightening up. Nate dropped his hand and looked at the squire who pointed a finger at the ghoul.

"Don't address the Sentinel like that, abomination! He's earned his rank and should be respected as such!" Squire Dangerfield scolded, her foot punctuating her exclamations.

Nate was about to speak again but Hancock tilted his head, the tricorner hat on his head emphasizing the movement. "You call him 'Sentinel,' the Railroad calls him 'Murderer,' the Minutemen call him 'General,' the Institute calls him 'Betrayer,' and I call him Natie. Now, tell me, Mad Maddy, who is wrong? Who is right?"

She stared at him, glaring with her jaw tight. It wasn't exactly obvious to Nate that some of what he'd said caught her off guard, but he saw the slight change in her brow. She was better at hiding her feelings from other people, so what about him made her lose her power? "The Railroad is wrong, he is not a murderer, he is a savior, and the Institute is wrong, he betrayed no one, they were threatening the Commonwealth and had to be destroyed."

Hancock snorted. "Everything you say has been preached at you like religion. You know nothing of the world." He looked back at Nate who gave him a frown. "How long do we have the runt?"

"Until she's ready to be an Initiate."

"Well, best get used to seeing my ugly mug then, kid, because this is going to take a while." Nate didn't know what to say, so he turned away from Hancock and rested his hand on Squire Dangerfield's shoulder to guide her out of the building.


	3. Confusion

The Sentinel was the second highest ranked Brotherhood soldier in the Commonwealth. There was no way he could be wrong about anything. So… why was he spending his time with a ghoul who looked to be on the break of going feral?

With a sideways glance, Madelyn looked at the ghoul in question. It wore the strangest red coat she'd ever seen with a flag for a belt and a tricorner hat covering its bald head. Right now it had a lit cigarette drooping from its lips giving off a faded line of smoke as it looked around. The Sentinel was wearing his fatigues with no armor, his weapon at his hip, ad a heavy bag thrown over his shoulder supported by one of his hands. It seemed stupid to her for him to leave himself so unprepared for combat, at least the ghoul was ready to shoot if something jumped out of the ruble.

Madelyn had constantly been on squiring missions since the Prydwen had entered the Commonwealth. She had basically made a game of keeping off the airship. She'd gotten pretty good at reporting to Kells and going on another mission back to back, and when none of the knights would take her she would just go to Proctor Quinlin. Quinlin was more than happy to send her with the scribes to pick up any technical documents they may have missed or just to carry the things they didn't want to. She didn't much care for the research patrols, but she did enjoy the Commonwealth experience. This was going to be more than just a 'Squiring Mission' though, and she could tell just based off of the first ten minutes, let alone three hours of travel.

"Hey, keep up, Maddy," the ghoul's voice caught her attention. She was starting to lag behind. Frustrated that she had to be corrected by an abomination like that made her choke on her words, keeping her from replying to it like she wanted to. "Nothing to say?" it asked as she jogged up next to it and the Sentinel.

"Let her be, Hancock." His words weren't an order, and there was no threat that she could hear behind them, which disappointed her, but the ghoul lifted its hands in surrender. She couldn't understand how the _Sentinel_ of the _Brotherhood of Steel_ was not only traveling with a ghoul willingly, but treating it like it was a person. "What's going through your mind, Squire Dangerfield?"

The ghoul chuckled, which turned Madelyn's thinking face into an all-in glare. "Nothing, Sentinel," she promised, composing herself before looking up at him. She hoped the brim of her hat had hid her facial expressions well enough to convince him, but the look on his face told her he wasn't buying it. When he raised an eyebrow prompting her to explain, she winced and gave a loose gesture to the ghoul, "I still believe that the ghoul is unnecessary…. Sentinel," she added, avoiding eye contact.

The Sentinel opened his mouth but was cut off by the sound of a double barrel shot gun firing directly behind Madelyn. The squire spun around to see a splatter of blood across pavement and long, tan bits of Bloodbug scattered about. The ghoul turned around and gave an awkward smirk. "That was real, right?"

"Yes, good job, Hancock." His words had a hint of relief? Was it common for the ghoul to fire on things that were not real? This only irked Madelyn more and she found herself glaring again.

"Hah, looks like I _am_ necessary," the ghoul boasted, putting its face in Madelyn's. She shifted her tongue and spat, landing a decent sized ball of saliva right between its eyes. Never in her life had she managed to so quickly respond with such a disrespectful physical response, but she had never been around such an irritating being. The ghoul nodded as it straightened up, though, which surprised her. "Thanks, I needed some moisturizer." Obviously she hadn't conveyed the correct about of distain.

A groan from behind her said the Sentinel was not so amused. "Come on, we aren't even half way to the Castle yet, I don't need you two killing each other."

"Oh, I don't know, Nate, Preston has a tendency to make you wish you were dead." With that new information, Madelyn was very curious as to who this 'Preston' was and what about him made you wish for death. She noticed that the Sentinel had a faint grin on his lips, as if what the abomination said actually held some truth, but he said nothing, telling her he did not want to confirm nor deny it. "Not that I think this squirt could manage it."

Oh that did it. " _Squirt?_ " Squire Dangerfield turned on the ghoul, pulling her knife out and freeing the blade in a practiced movement.

"Where the hell do you keep that thing?" the ghoul raised its arms, showing it was only trying to get a rise out of her, but she didn't miss how its wrinkled fingers stayed wrapped around the shotgun in a way that would make it easy to shoot if needed.

Eer… eer… eer… eer… eer….

Squire Dangerfield had heard that sound before, so habit took hold. The other knights had always told her to get behind them and then run back so that she would be protected from the blast. But they had been in power armor, and neither the Sentinel nor the ghoul was wearing a suit that could withstand a Super Mutant Suicider. While she moved back, adjusting herself so that she was behind the other two, the Sentinel dropped his duffle bag and knelt down, grabbing the barrel of a sniper rifle. The ghoul turned to face the three oncoming green skins, his shotgun up, ready incase they got in range.

Eer… eer… eer… eer….

The Sentinel was quick in his movements, having the gun out, loaded, and aimed all in a time that Madelyn had never seen. He didn't hesitate as he let out the breath she hadn't seen him take, and fired the rifle, using his knee for support. Even with how quick the movement was, Madelyn just caught the glimmer of a Molotov cocktail flying through the air toward them. One of the other green skins had thrown it, but now as the mini nuke exploded, killing all three Super Mutants, the Molotov was accelerated through the air quicker.

The ghoul saw it too and fired its shotgun, shattering the glass before it could consume them all in fire. Unfortunately, that's not how Molotovs work. By shattering the glass, the ghoul only spread out the rain of fire that followed. Instead of hitting the pavement and exploding the fire poured over them, catching onto whatever it could. And the Sentinel was right under the worst of it.

The Sentinel let out an unholy sound. He was on his feet in a moment, running away from the burning pavement around him. Madelyn stood in shock, staring with wide eyes, unsure of what to do but stand there and watch while her Sentinel stripped off his fatigues and fell into the dirt, rolling around to put out the flames that burned his skin. She rushed over to him to try to aid him, but she could smell his flesh burning and it put a horrible taste in her mouth. Then the ghoul's hands were on her, pushing her to the side and then it threw its red coat over the Sentinel to silence the flames. She didn't have time to be annoyed by its touch, before she could have said anything it had released her.

The Sentinel lied stilled on the ground while the ghoul patted out the last of the flames. He was breathing, but Madelyn didn't like how still he was. She moved around to get a better view of his face without getting too close to the ghoul. "Which pocket are your stimpaks in?"

"Front…" he answered the ghoul with little more than a breath. His face was twisted in a pain that Madelyn couldn't imagine. As the ghoul left the Sentinel to retrieve a stimpak, she came forward and looked at his blackened skin. "I'll be fine, Squire…." He hadn't opened his eyes, but somehow he knew she was there with a look of complete concern. Just when she was about to swear something about making him well again or ridding the world of those green skins, the ghoul reappeared and stuck a stimpak in the Sentinel's side. He let out a grunt and then relaxed. She knelt down next to him and watched as the skin healed, leaving behind only faint scars. "Thank you, John…" he whispered and then seemed to fall asleep, going limp and taking slow, deep breaths.

Squire Dangerfield had yet to hear 'John' be used toward the ghoul, but the way he said it sounded more… intimate than just a name. She frowned a little and looked up at the ghoul who was picking up the supplies that had spilled from the Sentinel's duffle bag. She watched it carefully before looking back at the man in question. She didn't like how he was just lying in the dirt, so she rolled him onto his back and dragged him slowly to the slope of the hill next to a car. It was a lot of work to move him, and at first she didn't think she could manage the ten-foot distance, but she did, and she made sure that the Sentinel was sitting at an angle so as to not have a kink in his neck when he woke.

Sighing of relief, she looked at her handy work and then noticed the ghoul was watching her. She frowned at it. "What?"

"Nothing," it said, and came to stand next to the Sentinel. Then it put the duffle bag down and sat next to the sleeping Brotherhood soldier.

"What're you doing?"

"Getting comfortable, we're not going to be able to go anywhere until he wakes up, and that won't be for a little while." She looked around and frowned. They were on an open road with almost no cover, and it was the middle of the day.

"I don't think I've ever heard such a stupid idea."

"I don't believe I asked for your opinion."

"Didn't have to, comes free of charge," she snapped, avoiding looking at it while she tried to locate a better place for the three of them to move the Sentinel to.

"Is the judging extra? I'd hate to have surprise charges at the end of the trip," the abomination's comeback fell on deaf ears as she had located what looked to be a house some yards away.

"I'll be right back," she announced and started to make her way off the road toward the property.

"Hey, what do you think you're doing?"

"Just stay with the Sentinel," she waved at the ghoul who frowned at her disapprovingly. She figured it was conflicted between letting her die and keeping the Sentinel safe, or being the one to scope out the building. At least, that's how she would have felt if she were in its boots.

The property had a little white picket fence around it that had been knocked over in some parts. The house itself was in pretty good condition with a doorway that was boarded up and completely inaccessible. Squire Dangerfield turned her attention to the windows. Once she'd stepped through the fence she looked around for any tracks that would indicate the presence of anything that called the house home. Once the perimeter was secure, she moved on to the actual house.

A swift peek inside reveled the house was void of life. Breaking a window on the first floor would compromise the integrity of its safety, allowing anything to just come through the broken window, especially one that could not only fit her, but a grown sized man. The Sentinel had been noted for his size more than once, a feat that few even in the Brotherhood had managed. She'd heard of a Paladin that had rivaled him in size, but that Paladin wasn't spoken about anymore.

Throwing away those thoughts, she focused on the task at hand. Getting into the house without compromising it. Frowning, she studied the face and then moved to circle the property. "Maybe… if I climb to the second story, and break a window up there, I can come down stairs and open a window–" shattering glass interrupted Squire Dangerfield. She found herself rounding to the back of the house with her knife drawn and her arms out in a prepared for a fight fashion.

But it was the ghoul. It had somehow managed to make it to the house whilst caring not only the duffle bag, but somehow the Sentinel as well. "What the hell?" she came up next to it.

"What the hell what?" it looked over at her with its black eyes. Without breaking eye contact it grabbed the duffle bag and pushed it through the window.

"I thought you were going to wait back by the road? And now you've compromised this position, I had a plan," she waved between the ghoul and the window that gaped at them.

"Are you done? It looked like you were going to stomp your foot…" it said with a slight smirk and then bent to retrieve the Sentinel. She didn't like when it touched the Sentinel with those wretched wrinkly fingers. "Get inside and help me, I don't want to hurt him," the ghoul stated, pulling the Sentinel to his knees. She understood how they'd gotten over here, the Sentinel was still somewhat mobile, supporting himself with just enough energy to keep him from being completely useless.

Squire Dangerfield went to the window, stripped off her backpack and pushed it through, then followed. Once she was in the house she moved the bags over to a couch. The Sentinel's duffle bag was easily five times heavier than hers, probably rounding to about her weight, now that she thought about it. "Maddy, get over here and help," the ghoul called through the window.

She returned, frowning intently at it, but it wasn't looking at her, rather it was assisting the Sentinel with bending through the window. She tried her best to help him where she could, but the man was huge, and awkward. Once he was through the window she helped him over to a loveseat where he hit and let his head bend back, supported against the couch. "Thank you, Squire Dangerfield," he whispered. He had managed to keep his eyes barely open until then, now they shut, relaxing with the rest of his body.

"Sentinel," she saluted his sleeping form.

The ghoul picked up a painting from the ground and leaned it against the window. She frowned at the gesture. It looked over at her, "What's with the judging stare?"

"I don't see your reasoning, you didn't have to break that window, and now you're just putting a picture in front of it? That's not going to keep out ferals." She put her hands on her hips.

"Wow," it frowned and then stepped around her, taking its hat off. It sat down next to the Sentinel and draped an arm behind the man's head. It made Madelyn very uncomfortable. The ghoul seemed to notice. "You should rest, Maddy."

"Why do you call me that?" Squire Dangerfield demanded. The ghoul gave her a shrug as an answer, and nothing more. She huffed and threw a hand in its direction showing she was giving up.

"Do you hate me?"

It took her a moment to answer because its voice wasn't harsh or taunting. It was asking a question, and wanted to know the answer. "Hate is too kind a word," Madelyn frowned.

"What word would you use to describe how you feel about me?" it raised a wrinkled brow.

"Loathing," she answered easily, but it was already shaking its head.

"You didn't have to think about that, you've been trained to say that. How do you feel about Nate?" It switched tactics, using the hand that wasn't resting behind the Sentinel's head to gesture to him.

"Admiration."

"No, not a word, how do you really feel?"

She glared at the ghoul. "I don't understand what you're looking for?"

"I have known Nate since he stumbled into Goodneighbor with only his Vault Suit on his back and Nick Valentine in tow," the ghoul's black eyes drifted off into a memory as it spoke. She hadn't known that the Sentinel was a Vault Dweller. She didn't know a lot about the Sentinel, actually. "Since then I've learned his favorite color is dark blue, he loves dogs, he is too kind to the general public, but has scary good judgment of character based off little interaction." The ghoul glanced sideways at the Sentinel, its black eyes lingering. "I feel many things for Nate, he's my best friend, the most loyal and irritating person I know. He is too good for scum nowadays, and I feel sorry for him. I feel admiration for his strength and the personal hardship he's faced, not the great things that everyone knows about. Random people who will never know him can admire him for destroying the Institute, for becoming the Sentinel of the Brotherhood, for wiping out the Railroad, but those close to him are there to be more than just supporters, we're here to make him feel normal again, after he's lost everything."

Madelyn couldn't take her eyes off of the ghoul as it spoke and she began to understand what it was looking for. "I feel… admiration," she started and the ghoul's head started shaking, but she continued, "for the feats he's done, but I feel confusion on his personal agenda." When it raised a wrinkled brow she continued, "I don't understand how he can be such a model Brotherhood soldier and have such a close relationship with you."

"Why does the Brotherhood hate me?"

"You're a product of man's stupidity, messing with powers beyond–"

"And that's my fault?" That caught her off guard. "Every ghoul was someone who dropped a nuke?"

"I–uh."

"You've been trained to say these things. I am, personally, a product of my own stupidity. I did this to myself, and I do not regret it. But other ghouls, feral or not, they didn't choose this life, they didn't do this to themselves. They did nothing to deserve your Brotherhood's wrath. And Nate knows that." She was speechless. She had no idea what to say to the ghoul. Its points were solid. She suddenly felt horrible. "So, in a word, how do you feel about me?"

After a moment, she met his stare, "Confused."


	4. The Castle

Here we go, here's a longer one. Little bit of teasing in here, we'll start to see why this is rated M here in a bit...

* * *

Nate woke up to Hancock's head on his shoulder. The ghoul had fallen asleep with his shotgun in his lap and probably had the intent of remaining awake for more of the afternoon and night even, but at some point sleep had taken over and now his head was hung close to Nate's throat. He smiled a little and slowly moved his arm so that it would slide behind the smaller man and wrap around him. Hancock stirred and opened his black eyes just enough to give Nate the 'you disturbed my slumber' stare.

"Go back to sleep, it's fine," Nate said. He'd slept for longer than he should have, he could already feel the headache coming on. He couldn't be sure why he'd slept for so long, it probably had to do with how back the burns had been. Your body does heal best while you're asleep. He frowned and pulled the collar of his shirt to the side to see the shoulder Hancock was leaning against. Even after the stimpak the scar was gnarly. He didn't even want to know what it had looked like before healing. He might not have the ability to use his arm if Hancock hadn't worked so fast.

Suddenly he remembered Madelyn. Why was she so easily forgotten? Probably because unless she and Hancock were at each other's throats she was quiet. Even now she was asleep in a ball on a chair, sleeping quietly, taking up almost no room and not making a noise. He needed to get a plan together: what she knew, what she needed to know, and what she wanted to learn.

Something touched Nate's leg. He looked down to see Hancock's hand gliding over the fatigues from his knee up toward his torso with a slight pull toward the space between his thighs, then back down. "John," he warned, his voice soft but it held a bit of protest.

"Hush," the ghoul whispered, the word was barely a breath. Then he tilted his head toward Madelyn's sleeping form some ten feet away. Nate met his stare with a disapproving one, but Hancock's grew into a smile. His hand drifted to the fatigues' zipper where he slowly drew it down, and then up again. Nate watched, noting the bulge under the fabric growing quickly.

He grabbed Hancock's hand and held it up. "Not now," he whispered in the ghoul's ear, pressing his forehead against his temple.

"You really know how to torture a guy, don't you?" Hancock sighed and leaned away. "I'll be right back," he added and stood, grabbing his hat and leaving. Nate knew that he was probably going to pop a couple of mentats and smoke. In their time together he'd gotten to weaning the ghoul off the drugs, but sometimes he just had to let him do it. To be perfectly honest, Nate didn't know why it bothered him so much. The drugs probably weren't going to kill him, but it seemed like the habit alone was what upset him. With a sigh, he grabbed his sniper rifle from his duffle bag and started taking it apart to clean it.

* * *

"So, how was the journey, General?" Preston's too cheery question summoned a groan from Nate. He rubbed his forehead and then ran his hands through his thick, black hair.

"Do you really want to know?" he asked the Minuteman soldier. Preston was young, and as faithful to the Minutemen as Elder Maxson was to the Brotherhood. This got him respect, but it also gave him an annoying edge. Nate had only recently learned that Maxson was celebrating his twenty-first birthday this year, and that surprised him. Preston was going on twenty-three and showed it. Even now he was standing with a relaxed posture, his laser rifle's butt next to his boot as he replied his concern for his General's feelings. Maxson had been raised for his position, and that is where they differ. While Maxson was younger than most of those whom he ordered, his entire upbringing was for that, so that he could do the best possible. Preston had joined the Minutemen and was forced into being the last by circumstance; this didn't give him the same wise-beyond-his-years experience that Maxson had.

"Of course I want to know."

"It wasn't boring," Nate breathed, stepping around Preston to go to his quarters. Once he reached his room he looked back at Preston who sat his rifle on the ground, leaning it against the wall by the door. Nate took off his burnt brotherhood blouse and folded it, setting it on top of the dresser he stood in front of. A dirty mirror sitting there caught his attention. He'd not noticed it before, maybe someone had put it in here while he was gone; that's been known to happen. Either way, he looked at himself in the mirror, meeting his own blue eyes, pale and slightly hazy. Above them were thick black eyebrows and below them were sun-kissed cheeks littered with freckles. He needed to shave, the stubble he normally sported had grown into something more fierce, and gave him an age he wasn't ready to claim. Looking away from the mirror he turned back to Preston and pulled the leather tie he was using to hold his hair back. As he spoke he brushed back his hair, trying to smooth it down. "As I was leaving the Prydwen I was assigned Squire Madelyn Dangerfield as a permanent squire until I or Elder Maxson see her fit for Initiate Status," he started, then went on to explain the events of the trip.

Preston was a good listener, he didn't interrupt, and always looked engaged in the conversation. Even as Nate moved around the room, changing into the General Uniform that he was expected to wear while around the Minutemen. He'd worn it once to the Prywen and had gotten plenty of stares. Maxson thought it gave the impression of mixed loyalties and that it shouldn't happen again, but he didn't tell Nate he couldn't continue to be the General of the Minutemen. The Elder had earned some respect for that.

Nate recounted how more than once Madelyn had pulled her knife on Hancock, but it seemed to significantly decrease as the journey wore on. Hancock had had just too much fun with the squire, using her feelings against her by pretending one night to go feral, and woke her up by gently chewing on her arm. That, of course, had earned him a well-deserved fist to the eye socket. Nate hadn't come to his aid on that one and the ghoul still sported the black eye. Preston had thought that part was funny, laughing gently as he leaned against a wall, putting Nate at ease. He forgot sometimes how nice it was to just talk to people. Hancock was great, but he always had something witty to say, and it was needed sometimes, and other times, Nate just wanted to be heard. As inconvenient as Preston was sometimes, there was a reason that Nate called him friend.

As Nate adjusted his chest plate and grabbed his coat he finished the story, "… and Madelyn just won't accept calling me anything but 'the Sentinel'. I mean, I understand I'm that, but I'm also just… Nate." He turned around, looking at Preston who nodded his understanding and grabbed the General's hat. Nate took it and thanked him. "So, what is it that you needed of me?"

Preston's smile faded. "Actually, it's Sanctuary…"

Suddenly Nate's heart stopped. "What happened?"

"We've received word that Mama's not doing too good, she's asking for you, I didn't think I should tell you over the radio, it didn't feel right for everyone to has a radio to be able to hear…" he frowned and Nate's face twisted.

"Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"You needed to talk, Nate," he frowned at the larger man, then rested his hand on his shoulder. "I'm sure she'll be fine, she just wants to see you. You haven't been out to Sanctuary in a while." Nate felt a swelling pang of guilt fester in his chest. He wouldn't put it passed Mama to fake an illness to get him out there if it meant she got to see him, she had, in fact, done that before.

"Thank you, Preston." The Minuteman soldier left and Nate turned to look at himself in the small mirror. At this angle he could see most of his torso all the way up to his hat. He wondered what Nora would think of him dressed like this, what she would think of everything he'd done. He couldn't fool himself into thinking she would be proud of everything, but he comforted himself with the knowledge that she would have loved him anyway.

As if he had known just what Nate needed, Hancock came up behind him in the mirror and grinned. "Breaking out the General duds, must be serious." The ghoul stepped up to him and rested his elbow on his shoulder, the action didn't look the least bit comfortable, but it made Nate smile which was the man's goal. "Where are we off to?"

"Sanctuary, Mama is sick," he answered, turning toward the smaller man.

Hancock always held his slender frame in a laid back way that drove Nate crazy. It was unfair how easy it was for him to warm Nate up and change any mood he was in. When he had married Nora he had felt a strong love for her. Prewar, everyone was worried about each other's business and they had very important images to live up to. Two men (or two women) could have been married, but no one wanted to live, shop, eat, or _be_ around an openly homosexual couple, so most of the time those relationships were kept secret. A thirty year old, attractive bachelor (or bachelorette) called a lot of unnecessary attention, though, so it wasn't uncommon for them to get married to someone whose presence they actually enjoyed and secretly visit their lover.

Nate had live with two parents that had not only been very traditional, but were also not the least bit understanding. So it made sense that when he had told his mother that he thought a boy on his baseball team was cute that her reaction had convinced him that he was just misunderstanding his feelings. She told him that he was human, so he could tell the difference between people who were attractive and people who weren't, that didn't mean that you liked them. She promised him that girls would be more interesting to him as he got older. That didn't _really_ happen though, because as girls became more interesting, so did boys. He felt the same toward them both, finding it easier to tell who he liked more when he would get to know them. He ended up never dating anyone because only girls whose personalities he didn't like were interested in him that way. And the one time he had told a friend of his that he was interested in the pitcher of his team, that friend told him he should never bring that up again.

Nate was an only child because of a mistake in his birth, which he later found out to be the reasoning behind a lot of his parents' marital unhappiness. A Nurse Handy had glitched while pulling him out via cesarean section, and destroyed his mother's uterus. He had never gotten any more details than that because she would always cry, so by the time he could actually understand everything he'd figured there was no point in asking for clarification. Since he was an only child, he had spent his free time with friends, of which he had too many to ever really call one 'best'. He spent as little time at home as he could, since his father would spend all his time at home on the TV and his mother would help the Mr. Handy they owned clean the house despite Cenric's direct requests of her not to. Looking back, he noticed just how much she hated that robot, and just how much she actually hated her husband.

Nate never thought marriage was for those who wanted to be outstandingly happy. He learned from his parents that it was more of an arrangement, and it was only made better if you actually tolerated the person you were with. So he got it in his head that he was going to marry a woman he liked enough to want to come home to every day, and when he met Nora, she seemed perfect.

He met her at the café he would later ask her to marry him in. She worked as a waitress and was several years younger than him. She was trying to pay off loans for law school, and he was on leave. Before going home for leave Sumner (a soldier in Nate's unit) had shared with Nate that he was planning on finding a pretty girl to call wife so people stopped thinking him queer. At this point in his life he had been called names, but he had always played it off. Sure, he liked girls, they made him happy, but so did men. He and Sumner had a lot in common, and Sumner had been relieved to find out that Nate shared similar feelings as he did. The only difference was that Sumner didn't see women like Nate did, and was actually quite disgusted with the idea of being with one romantically. Nate couldn't sympathize with him on that matter, but Sumner was comforted with the knowledge that he wasn't the only one who was interested in the same sex.

Nora was cute, and sweet. She had a rather straight figure, and modest breasts and rear. Other than her golden hair, which fell like water around her, she was all around almost plain unless she wore makeup. But he loved that about her. She didn't demand attention, and she didn't care if she had it. He had initiated flirting, and she seemed surprised by his interested, but reciprocated it. He spent every day on leave visiting her at that diner for her whole shift, and then walked her home. She fascinated him, and for the first time he found himself truly loving a woman. She wasn't preoccupied with the opinions of others like most girls, and this only made her more attractive. She decided she would take off his last day on leave to spend it with him, and he knew he would never have this kind of connection with anyone in his life time, so he asked her to marry him. And had he died in the years he was supposed to, he wouldn't have.

In the Wasteland nobody cared what you did with your personal life. It was almost liberating being able to be open about his feelings about John. And the only one who would care didn't care because he was a man. He didn't forget Nora, or his feelings for her, and the pain he felt when betraying their son. But he also was no longer prewar Nate.

He took Hancock into his arms. John's body fit against him similar to how Nora's had, which had only helped Nate fall for the ghoul. Hancock grinned at his being manhandled, "You get all dressed up just to take that back off?" His blue eyes narrowed as he looked down at John, "Tempting aren't I?" Nate leaned down and brushed his lips over Hancock's.


	5. Reasons Why

Madelyn hovered over the shoulder of the man on the radio. He was obviously very uncomfortable with her standing right there, but she was far too interested in what he was doing to leave. "So you receive word how again?"

"A settlement will use a radio signal to call for help."

"What if they don't have a radio?"

"Then they can't ask for help," he said simply.

Madelyn frowned, "And that's okay with you?"

The man turned around and opened in mouth, but someone's hand rested on her shoulder and she spun around to see a man with dark skin and a friendly smile. "We're not 'okay' with it, but there's little we can do unless a neighboring settlement calls it in, either by seeing it, or being alerted by the settlement in need. But almost all settlements have a radio connection to us, so we don't have to worry about that as often as you'd think."

Madelyn nodded, satisfied. "Is the Sentinel ready for us to depart?" she asked the man, Preston he'd been introduced as.

"Uh, I think he needs a moment, actually, him and Hancock are… talking," he looked uncomfortable for a moment, shifting his laser musket in his hands. She didn't like the gun; it was far too bulky for a laser weapon and the crank made it appear too much of a hassle for quick combat. The weapons issued by the Brotherhood were more ideal for combat.

Madelyn shifted her weight, adjusting the scarf around her neck; she could really use a shower. The trip here had really done a number on her: her auburn hair was gross, matted and greasy from sweat. She had to wear it up, under a hat that came down on her forehead to shield her eyes from the sun and unwanted looks. On her other squiring missions she'd never thought twice about her uniform. Being able to let her hair down and clean it would be fantastic. She had to clear it with the Sentinel first, though, so she left Preston and the radio operator with a polite nod. They didn't notice her as a call came in requesting assistance at a 'Hangman's Ally.'

"Do we have anyone near there?" Preston asked.

"MacCready reported Oberland Station was clear of their…" and then Madelyn was out of earshot. They were less organized than the Brotherhood, just in the half hour she has been here she could see that. They didn't have a systematic send and return pattern, and it seemed like one person could be sent to check on three or four settlements before returning. Like this MacCready person for instance, he or she probably weren't going to end up back here at the Castle for another few days, between going from his past missions and this one, which will be the first of several additional assignments. That is, if Oberland was the first assignment he'd left on. Either way, she was glad she didn't have to deal with it. Preston had called the Sentinel 'General' when they'd arrived, which was wrong, obviously de didn't understand Brotherhood ranking.

Madelyn was starting to feel her impatience. It had taken them just over two days of straight walking to get here from the Prydwen, and most of that time had been the ghoul trying to get her to admit she actually liked it. And for a moment she couldn't help but smile, but then it went and pretended to go feral, nibbling on her arm to wake her from a couple hours rest. She couldn't believe that she had let it doubt her beliefs. The Brotherhood was her life, and what they believed was what she believed. When she was young, and the Brotherhood had taken her in, it was … weaker, they didn't act, they only reacted. Now they were strong, waging and winning war.

Madelyn walked around, trying to find the Sentinel's chambers. Eventually, she came to the end of a hall to a door that was just cracked enough for her to see a set of Brotherhood fatigues folded neatly on its top. That had to be the Sentinel's quarters. The squire came up, knocking on the door gently before pushing it open. "Sentinel Walker? I was wondering if I could be permitted–"

Madelyn's words caught in her throat as she looked around the door, into the room, her eyes settling on a large man dressed in a long, blue coat, and a pointed hat on his head. He looked kind of like the ghoul from the back, but was much larger through the shoulders and about the same at the waist. Under that hat was a small black ponytail, just like the Sentinel's. Beyond the blue was an all too familiar red frock coat. The ghoul was kneeling in front of the Sentinel with a hand on his hip for stability. When he twisted around at the shoulders to look at her, it leaned to the side, making a damp noise with its mouth. Then it licked the corner of its lip, catching a strand of drool that threatened to escape.

"Squire Dangerfield," the Sentinel's cheeks caught fire, and the ghoul leaned back onto its heels, a smirk pulling on its lips.

"I'm–I'm sorry, Sentinel!" she stammered and looked away from the two. "I'll just–" she turned and left them. She couldn't think until she was alone in a hallway, dark because of its distance from a window.

She had walked in on soldiers in those same positions, and she knew just want had happened. She couldn't get the image out of her head. She replayed it in her head unwillingly. As she opened the door the Sentinel had said something, a whisper, something expressing his enjoyment. The ghoul was more than just a friend, it had told her that the Sentinel was its best friend, but he was more to him.

The squire balled her hands up into fists and pressed them to her temples. The Sentinel of the Brotherhood of Steel was fucking a ghoul. She gagged, acid burning her throat. Oh, Elder Maxson would….

' _I feel many things for Nate, he's my best friend, the most loyal and irritating person I know. He is too good for scum nowadays,_ ' the ghoul had said. He'd mentioned the Sentinel was from a Vault, from what she'd heard they did horrible things to Vault Dwellers. What had been done to the Sentinel? Was that why he allowed himself to have feelings for that disgusting creature?

She flinched. Disgusting seemed harsh. Abomination was starting to lose it's edge, and maybe that's why she suddenly felt better using that word. Was she going soft? She had heard some Brotherhood soldiers around the Prydwen, and back in the Capitol Wasteland, mention their indifference to ghouls who had not yet gone feral. This was more than indifference, and she knew she'd heard whispers about that happening too. Maybe it wasn't as inconceivable as she thought.

The ghoul wasn't the worst company she'd ever had, and honestly, if he wouldn't have been a ghoul she probably would have liked him right off the bat. It. Like… it right off the bat. Damn it.

She needed to take a shower and stop thinking about this.

* * *

The water was cold, dirty, and probably irradiated, but Madelyn wasn't thinking about the water. She couldn't get the image of the Sentinel out of her head. The ghoul kneeling in front of him with that smirk, and the black eyes that were full of a sin he enjoyed far more now that she knew about it. Oh God, she gagged and lowered herself to the floor of the shower, putting her head between her knees. Her heart hammered, and as she tried to avoid thinking about it, she realized she wasn't thinking about what they had done as much as how Elder Maxson would react.

She felt nervous, she had an obligation to tell the Elder, but she… couldn't. Not for more reasons than she was willing to think at the moment. She couldn't go back to the Prydwen until she was ready to be an Initiate, then Maxson couldn't send her away, and if she had to she could tell him then. Yeah, that was a good plan. But how long would that take?

She frowned, lifting her head so that the water could pour over her face, chilling her to the bone. She shuttered, and stood up, the image of the ghoul blowing the Sentinel was burned into her frontal lobe now. It probably wouldn't have been so traumatizing if it would have been someone else, but the idea of sex made her uncomfortable anyway, no matter what kind. She attributed it to her lack of experience. Sure, she'd seen a few men and other women completely nude, she lived in the barracks most of her life after all, but she had only ever kissed two boys, and neither got any farther than that. Which was understandable since she was still rather young, but other squires her age were a bit more… practiced than she was comfortable with being. Besides, after both boys had kissed her they'd gotten black eyes from her brother, this put an end to any boy getting within a klick of her without orders.

She and her brother avoided confirming their relationship because of rank differences and wanting to avoid people thinking she was getting special treatment. This didn't keep her from visiting him often and talking to him, which was how he learned about the boys and then gave them swift beatings. The word didn't exactly get out about them being siblings, but it was made clear that you stayed away from Madelyn unless you wanted a shiner. Besides, she was 'Married to the Brotherhood' just like her brother, meaning neither of them were interested in a serious relationship as it might conflict with orders or priorities.

This also kept her from having friends, as most squires were not as severe as she was yet. She was one of maybe three girls at a time in her squiring unit. She was expected to perform the same, so she took it a step farther, her brother pushing her beyond them so that she would excel passed her peers. But she was never allowed to move on without them. Yeah, special treatment…. No one wanted to hang out with her because she was top of the class and they knew it. She enjoyed being the best, but she had the bad tendency to inform everyone else. Madelyn shot herself in the foot when a girl offered to be her friend, and Madelyn, not ten minutes later, started to coach her on her knowledge of the field. The girl was okay at first, but Dangerfield wasn't good at stopping at the right time and ran the poor girl off with her questioning and expectations.

Even the Knights she squired would seem relieved upon reporting back into Lancer-Captain Kells. Kells and Maxson never told her she was doing anything wrong, though, so she assumed she wasn't the problem. Upon reflection she always doubted herself, everything she did, and she would kick herself, like she was now. She should have knocked and waited for the Sentinel to answer, not just barge in on him. She should have left the moment she saw what he was doing, not gawk at him like a stupid child. He was probably going to request her return to the Prydwen. She would be surprised if he was even calling a vertibird to their location to pick her up.

Fear swelled in her belly and she felt sick, she couldn't go back to the Prydwen, not now, not before she was ready to be an Initiate, otherwise she would be sent back to the Capitol, and she didn't want that. Madelyn shook her head and pounded a fist against the damp stone of the shower wall. "Ugh," she shook her head. She was so confused. Why wasn't she more upset about the Sentinel?

The whole way here the ghoul had been a great companion to him…. They worked better than most Brotherhood soldiers did. At the beginning the Sentinel would forget about her, but after they'd spent the night at the house he didn't, which made Madelyn feel better. The ghoul seemed to go out of its way to notice her, and even get a rise out of her. It was playful, she now noticed. In the moment she was always so angry and annoyed, but now she smiled a little, remembering him gnawing on her arm and groaning like he was trying to keep from laughing. She had given him a pretty good black eye, but now she smiled because of how funny it was, not because she hit the ghoul and the Sentinel had not chided her like she feared he would.

Little over a day and she was starting to feel something other than hate for a ghoul. She rubbed her temples with her knuckles and turned off the water. She was pretty sure the water had been pumped in from the lake outside with little filtering, but she surprisingly felt a whole lot better. But she also felt worse.

Madelyn grabbed a towel as a knock on the wooden door echoed through the quiet washroom. "Dangerfield? Are you in here?" the Sentinel's voice came through the crack he made, holding the door so that it wouldn't open all the way until he was permitted entry.

She wrapped the towel around herself. "Sentinel," she said.

"May I enter? Are you decent?"

"You may enter," she didn't recognize her voice. It sounded stiff, like she was purposefully holding back emotions.

The Sentinel came in, dressed just as he had been half an hour ago. She didn't understand why he was wearing such an odd outfit. He looked at her, his eyes showing a shock that made her feel uncomfortable. Was he shocked because she was only in a towel? Other reasons? Madelyn preferred to wear loose clothing, but squire uniforms were bulky, with many pockets and layers to keep track of, so she felt like she lost a lot of herself in the clothes. Now she only had her towel tied next to her left shoulder, the fabric muting her form, but showing more skin than the Sentinel had even seen of her. She ran her fingers through her auburn hair that fell long passed her shoulders, but she always had to have it off her collar. He recovered himself, "I'm sorry for–"

"It's okay, Sentinel," she said, cutting him off against her own training. "You care for it a great deal, don't you?"

"It? Dangerfield, his name is Hancock," he frowned at her and she felt horrible, but she couldn't bring herself to say anything. If she agreed or disagreed she would be wrong, and right now, she couldn't handle that. "I love him," the Sentinel said, his voice kind.

"How?" was all she could manage.

"Have you met him? For a moment, forget he's a ghoul. Tell me he's not someone that you'd like to have around…" the Sentinel sat in a damp chair, putting him more at her height. "How long have you been in the Brotherhood?"

She didn't reply right away, she didn't like thinking of her past, she tried to avoid it whenever she could. A grand total of one person knew her whole backstory. "Since… most of my life."

"I can understand that the Brotherhood is your family, it's mine too." He closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger. "Get dressed and meet me at the café in front of the Castle." He stood up and left her.

* * *

The café was small and had a gaping hole in one side. Madelyn saw some people walking around inside and took a deep breath before making her way down to the restaurant. It didn't feel right to enter through the hole so she walked around to the door and entered through that way. The Sentinel sat in a corner booth on the other side of the diner. He was sipping on a Nuka Cola while reading a comic book. She cat down across from him.

"Same clothes? You know you don't have to be in uniform all the time, squire," he said without looking at her. She frowned a little. "Speak your mind."

"Why are you wearing that?" she nodded at the blue coat.

"Because this is my other uniform, and honestly, I'm more comfortable in this than I am in most of what the Brotherhood gives me." He leaned back, putting the comic book down. Madelyn looked at the cover, and then back at the Sentinel. "It's the uniform of the General of the Minutemen, and since I'm their General, I should wear it."

"You're their General?" Shock wasn't a strong enough word for how she felt, but it was the only thing she could think of because of her limited cognitive function at the moment.

"I am," he nodded, a gloved hand rubbing the black hair along his jaw almost shy-like.

"Does Elder Maxson know?"

"I don't think he particularly cares what I do at this point. I've done everything I can for the Brotherhood, Dangerfield," he frowned at her. "I have begged for missions and they just tell me that they don't have anything for someone of my rank."

"But… that's a conflict of interest," she protested.

"How? I lead the Minutemen, if nothing else, I can make them an extension of the Brotherhood. Listen, squire," he leaned forward, meeting her light grey eyes with his hazy blue ones. He normally wore sunglasses, now they were resting on the back of his neck and his hat was resting on the table to his right. She looked over his face, noting small, healed scars. He was handsome, very much so, and because of his attendance neglected to trim back the black hair that was now long enough to make a short Colonial ponytail at the base of his neck. Looking at him now, she could count three silver hairs, one in his mustache, right below the left nostril, and one in each side burn. They were small, but they showed the age that he hid well. "The world works in many ways. Not everything that is Brotherhood is right, and not everything outside the Brotherhood is wrong."

"I don't understand how you can say that," she glared at him.

"Did you know I came from a Vault before here?" he asked her, raising a black eyebrow.

"I'd heard it mentioned."

"Do you know what they did to me?"

"No," she whispered, her voice barely audile.

"I was frozen in a cryogenic pod across from my wife Nora who was holding our infant son, Shaun." He was frowning at her, but staring, hard into her eyes, demanding she not look away. "I was born before the war. Nora and I were married just over a year before Vault-Tec came knocking on our door. We thought it was just going to be a precaution, so fuck it, why not. Better safe than sorry in the events of 'total atomic annulation' right?" He looked at the Grognak the Barbarian Jungle of the Bat-Babies comic. She didn't know what to think. He was obviously getting upset, so she didn't say anything, and sat still, looking at his face. "The same fucking day the world ended. We ran to the Vault, and I just… I knew something was wrong. As soon as we were in the Vault I had this bad feeling, it felt like cattle being herded. But Nora was so scared, I had to throw away my fear for her. The pods were supposed to 'decontaminate and depressurize' us before we went deeper into the Vault, the doctor said. I looked at that seat and I knew that was bullshit, but I…" he grabbed the comic, holding it tightly. "I climbed into that pod of my own accord. I fell for the trap because I _hoped_ I was wrong."

"I'm… I'm so sorry, Sentinel."

"Nate, my name… is Nate," he said, looking at her now, his eyes red rimmed from the pain she could see deep inside.

"Nate…" she whispered.

"Yes," he nodded, smiling just a little. He looked over her face, and then he looked back at the comic. "I woke up once before getting out of the Vault. We all woke up then… but I was the only one refrozen, and everyone else suffocated," his eyes were staring into the past as he remembered the events. "I watched as my wife was shot in the head at point-blank range, and our son was stolen from her dead hands. And then I watched them leave. I broke my hands beating on the glass before they froze me again." The Sentinel leaned back in the booth, letting the comic rest on the table. "The next time I woke up I got out. I took Nora's wedding ring and got out of the Vault. Imagine the look on my face when I see the Waste for the first time. I remember all this when it was green and alive… bustling with people and loud… and polluted with smog not radiation," he looked out the window now, his face twisted in a pained frown. She felt tears welling in her eyes, how could one person live through such a change? "I went home first…. Codsworth, my Mr. Handy was still there, faithful until the end, I never understood that, I had him less than two months before the bombs came and he stuck around for two… hundred… years," Nate closed his eyes, shaking his head. "He didn't know anything about Shaun's kidnapping so he pointed me to Concord, and that's where I found Preston and a group of survivors. I didn't know what I was doing, but they needed help and so did I, so I got them out of there, killing… people, raiders, but they were people…." He cringed at the memory. "I was in the army before everything, and I just… fear what if Nora would have been in my place? How would she have faired? I wouldn't wish this on her.

"But I got them out of there, and I got them back to Sanctuary, where they live now. Mama Murphy pointed me to Diamond City, and it was on my way there that I met Paladin Danse…" suddenly the Sentinel was smiling. But it wasn't a happy smile; it was a very sad one. "I heard the fighting before the distress signal. I was helping them before I even knew who they were. I just… I saw a suit of power armor, and before the war that meant army, so I felt like I had to help." He met Madelyn's stare. "I helped them get the deep range transmitter up and running that broadcasted the S.O.S. to the Prydwen. I joined the Brotherhood then, but I had to find Shaun, so I continued to Diamond City without Danse, and met Piper who pointed me to Nick," he gave a chuckle. "You'll probably hate Nick if you don't like Hancock…. But Nick got me to the asshole that stole my son, and I killed him. It was the second hardest thing I've ever done, but I still say it was worth it. When I was on my way back to Diamond city the Prydwen was flying in from the west. It was the most impressive sight I've ever seen," he smiled at her, "That radiation storm made her look ten times more badass."

Finally Madelyn smiled as well, "Yeah, I remember that…."

"I joined the Minutemen before I joined the Brotherhood, but I joined them the same week," he gave her a thoughtful glance. "I devoted most of my time to the Brotherhood when I was hot on the trail to the Institute, but when I got there…." Suddenly his happiness faded. "I had all these voices whispering in my ears, asking for information, the Railroad, the Brotherhood, the Minutemen even wanted to know whatever they could about the Institute, no matter how small. I wish I wouldn't have been able to get the tape to work," he looked down at his hands now. "Danse might still be alive if I wouldn't have given Proctor Ingram that damn holotape."

"What do you mean?" Madelyn raised an eyebrow at him. "He was a synth."

"Yeah, and he didn't know. He was… Paladin Sebastian Danse, a Brotherhood soldier who bled steel just like you and I," the Sentinel swallowed hard, a lump seeming to form in his throat. "I tried to talk him into running, I tried to talk him out of it… you see," he met her eyes, giving her a guarded look, "Danse and I had grown very close, and we were almost… like Hancock and I, and then that happened." Paladin Danse and the Sentinel would have become lovers if he wouldn't have been killed? She wasn't sure if that was worse or just equally as bad as him being with a ghoul.

"Why were you trying to keep from killing him?"

"Because, he was Paladin Danse. He wasn't an impostor, replaced to infiltrate the Brotherhood. He joined the Brotherhood as a synth, he had been given memories when he escaped and he left the Commonwealth, shortly after, he started a life in Rivet City and joined the Brotherhood from there… that's why his DNA matched that of an _escaped_ synth. And I wish from the bottom of my heart that that little word would have meant more to Elder Maxson, but he… is too dedicated."

" _Too_ dedicated?"

"Yes. You want to know why I'm General of the Minutemen _and_ Sentinel of the Brotherhood? Because I can't pick just one. The Brotherhood is everything I need, but the Minutemen are everything that I want. The Minutemen don't condemn synths and ghouls that are non-hostile, they don't plan to do these outrageous things that could end up making things far worse before any better. But the Brotherhood is the military family that I missed, that I need. But I'm not going to change my beliefs to suit them."

Madelyn looked down at her own hands now. "You can speak your mind, Dangerfield."

"I'm just… so confused. I was the top of my class, and that's why I thought I would be a good match for you," she paused, looking at him, and then corrected, "Er, that's why Elder Maxson thought I was a good match for you, and since then I thought he was right." She balled her hands into fists, but then rambled on, "But the more time I spend with you the more confused I get. I don't hate Hancock like I should, I want to hate him more than I do."

"Why do you want to hate him?"

"Because that's how I should feel…" she said, her brows curving up at the center, showing her distress.

"Dangerfield, you don't have to feel anything you don't want to. Just let your own feelings come through. Then you won't be confused." He leaned forward, his hand resting on hers. His single hand was the size of bother of hers folded together. She nodded, looking up to meet his eyes.

"Madelyn, my name is Madelyn, Nate," she said, smiling at her Sentinel.

* * *

 **Learned that apparently there is unused dialog that says Paladin Danse's name is Saul Johnfield Danse. For future reference, I might keep Johnfield, but Saul Danse just doesn't do it for me. So I'm going with it's not in game, so I'm going to give him something a little nicer in my opinion.**


	6. Diamond City

Short, but starting to get some feels and a little more background, I'll try to make the next one longer.

* * *

The way to Diamond City was surprisingly the most boring two days of travel that Nate had had since Paladin–

Nate stopped the thought and looked sideways at Hancock who was no more than ten feet away, but his eyes were far beyond the buildings. Without thinking about it, Nate stepped closer to him, and bumped his elbow against the ghoul's. Snapping to attention, he looked at him and smirked, "How long was I out?"

"No telling, I think I zoned out too," Nate gestured with the butt of his gun to the green walls of the Great Green Jewel of the Commonwealth. "Least we made it in one piece."

"I don't think I've ever been able to say I was 'bored' on a trip to Diamond City," Hancock laughed, then looked back. "Ah, squirt looks like she's about to wet herself."

"I heard that," the squire barked, but when Nate looked back at her she was gazing up at the walls with an overwhelmed wonder. He couldn't help but smile; to her this was so impressive, but that was ruined for him by the memory of what it had looked like before the war. Everything looked like shit now, but seeing her fall in love with the sights was enough for him to take a second look and appreciate what was happening. People were rebuilding, not quickly, but they were, despite everything.

"You two get me some jet and shells, yeah?" Hancock grabbed Nate's shoulder as he stopped. The taller man paused long enough to nod and give the ghoul a longing stare, his eyes flickering from his lips to his shark-like eyes. "Later, big guy," he chuckled softly.

"'Course we'll get you some shells," Nate promised, and gave Hancock's shoulder a squeeze back.

"And jet…" he insisted, but Madelyn was standing there now.

"You're not coming with us?"

"Ghouls aren't allowed in Diamond City, squirt," the ghoul smirked. "Don't worry, I'll miss you, too."

She looked like she wanted to say something, but she just stared at him. Hancock wiggled his brow at her, marking his win, and then turned to leave. "I'll be where I normally am, Natie." We waved a hand over his shoulder to them. He would be waiting by the pod, near Hardware Town, where someone had set up a little place to sit. He had found it when he was on Kellogg's trail, a quaint place just outside the buildings. Hancock had adopted the place since it was still in sight of Diamond city, but far enough away that the guards wouldn't say anything. Nate started toward the front gate with Madelyn at his side

"I thought… like, I knew ghouls weren't allowed but he's…" she looked back at the red frock coat.

"A ghoul," Nate finished her sentence. He paused, looking down at her.

"But…" she frowned. Nate came back and stood in front of the squire. She hadn't completely accepted Hancock, but she was starting to see him as a person, which was more than he thought would happen in the week that he'd had her. She was a good person at heart, which was why it was such an easy change for her.

"I know," he smiled down at her. Then she blinked and looked at her hands. She had to convince herself her feelings were wrong, and that's what he planned on changing. "Come on, you need some noodles." She walked next to him and he rested his hand between her shoulder blades. She didn't move away from the contact like she did whenever Hancock would touch her, and she even seemed to lean into it some.

Nate ignored the guards when they greeted him, he didn't feel the need for small talk or really any talk with them. None of them had ever done anything for him, either by their choice or not, even when he had to get Mel out of prison to help him and Bobbi take a strong room (not the strong room she had originally promised, but that was a story for a camp fire) the guard had required far too many caps to be considered helpful.

When they entered the city, Madelyn paused, "Wow," slipped out from her lips and he smiled.

"Here, wait there, I'll buy you noodles and something to drink and I'll get the supplies." He urged her forward.

"Oh, I can help you," she said, looking up at him.

"You can relax, squire," he promised. "I can handle some supplies alone."

"Okay," she whispered, smiling a little. Nate bought two bowls of noodles from Takahashi and a Nuka Cola from Crazy Myrna. Madelyn took off her hat and sat at the noodle stand happily eating her first meal of the day. He was proud of her for her strength, not once had she complained about being tired or hungry, and she followed orders much better than Hancock. But, Hancock wouldn't be Hancock if he followed orders to a tee.

"Hail, squire!" a voice called behind Nate while he was looking at Arturo's wares at Commonwealth Weaponry. He looked over his shoulder to see a Brotherhood Initiate stopped to talk to Madelyn with a small group of soldiers leaving him behind.

"Oh my God! Dustin!" Nate smiled a little, then Madelyn leapt up to hug the boy. He welcomed it with open arms and Nate's smile faded when she pulled away, but the boy kept his hands on her hips. Suddenly everything Arturo was saying was going through one ear and out the other. What if she needed to defend herself? All she had was that little knife?

"Arturo, do you have anything smaller? Something for… a first timer?" Nate listened as carefully as he could to Madelyn's conversation with the boy.

"…You look great, Madelyn."

"Thanks, you too," she laughed. Nate looked over his shoulder while the shop keep looked for a gun. The boy had to be two years or less older than her, looking to be around eighteen, he forgot that she was fifteen often, but now he saw it. The way that boy looked at her, it gave Nate mixed feelings. She was too young for a boy like that, he only wanted one thing…. But she was a young woman, and he wasn't her dad….

"Here you go, Señor Walker, a 10 mm, perfect for first timers," the clatter of a weapon on the counter made Nate look back. It was a fine weapon with as many mods as it had parts. "Only the best, yes?"

"Only the best," he agreed. His attention went back over his shoulder.

"Are you squiring again?" the boy looked around, his eyes not staying on Nate even to see that he was looking at him as he tried to find a Brotherhood soldier that she could be with. Yet another reason Nate loved to wear this uniform.

"Yeah, we're just here for a pit stop," she stepped back away from the boy, but he seemed disappointed.

"Same, we were just leaving," he threw a glance at his unit, and then straightened back on Madelyn.

"You should catch up, they might leave without you."

"Hope I don't get a black eye for giving you another hug," he scooped her into an embrace and she smiled, but seemed to push against his chest, trying to end it quicker than their first.

"You remember that?" she seemed shocked.

"Getting jumped by three guys in your bunk in the middle of the night for kissing a girl _once,_ leaves an impression," he stated, glancing around with newfound paranoia. Nate turned back and started counting out caps for Arturo, and decided to trade a couple of things instead of spending all his caps at once.

"I didn't know how he'd done it…"

"Who was it? I just assumed you sent them after me," the boy asked.

"My brother." This was the first time Nate had heard that she had family. Now that he thought about it, he didn't really know that much about her.

"Oh, who's that? I didn't know you had a brother."

"Initiate Cane! We have to move on!" a scribe yelled so loud most of the Marketplace, including Nate, turned to look, and the Initiate turned red.

"Bye, Dustin," Madelyn smiled and waved at him as she backed to her stool.

"Bye, Madelyn," he replied and walked away. Nate watched he boy rejoin his unit, and then looked at his squire who now was staring at her noodles deep in thought. He wondered what she was thinking about, but knew he had to get a couple more things, so he made his way around, quickly buying the ammo and purified water he would need for the trip. Finally he was finished and stepped up to Madelyn.

"Hey, Dangerfield." She turned around quickly, snapping to attention as he swung his refilled duffle bag over his shoulder. "Grab your left overs, Hancock will give us both shit if he doesn't get any." She nodded and grabbed her extra bowl and the Nuka Cola she had yet to finish. "Did you not like it?" he asked, nodding to the glass.

"Oh, no, it's just… I don't drink them often so I decided I would make this one last." He made a mental note to offer her Nuka Colas more often. With that in mind, they made their way back toward the entrance. They would grab Hancock and then swing by to check on Hangman's Ally to make sure their raider problem had been cleaned up.


	7. Insubordinate Civilian

Hangman's Ally was probably the most interesting settlement that Madelyn had see yet. It was built in a beehive fashion down the space between two tall buildings. There was almost no space that wasn't built on to. "This is impressive..."

"Yeah but all it takes is one Molotov and the whole place goes down," Hancock frowned and Nate nodded.

"We had planed on putting steel up, but the provisioners were being stopped by raiders. That's why they put in the call," Nate sighed. "The other side had been breached."

"Are the people okay?"

"Time to find out. There's no guard..." he replied as he made his way forward. Madelyn suddenly had a bad feeling. Was it common for them not to have a guard posted?

Hancock held his double barrel shotgun and stood next to Madelyn with Nate right in front of them, a combat rifle ready. She grabbed her ten-millimeter from the holster on her hip and held it in both hands, ready to react if needed but kept it pointed down as she had been instructed to when not in active combat. She loved the weapon that the Sentinel had given her after leaving Diamond city.

Madelyn could feel her heart pounding against her ribs; it was almost painful how suspenseful it was to walk up to the gate. Nate was careful to be as quiet as possible, crouched down and moving with an unnatural ease in the position. Hancock didn't bother sneaking, instead he hugged the wall, so Madelyn followed behind him. The Sentinel pulled open the gate door next to the one they now stood in front of. He only cracked it slightly and peaked his head in. Madelyn watched his hands on his combat rifle flex, preparing for use. Hancock glanced down at her. "No matter what, stay behind me, Maddy," he said with a fatherly sternness. She nodded, she had no plan to step out from behind that red frock coat.

With a gesture to tell them to wait, Nate slid in between the doors. There was a moment of silence, and then a shot. Madelen jumped, her entire body ridged. Another shot fired, this one louder, blasting right after the first. The second bullet came through the wood of the gate door that Hancock and Madelyn stood against, opening the skin of her left bicep. "Ow!" she cried out and quickly grabbed her mouth to stifle the sound with one hand while the other held her heavy ten-millimeter so as not to drop it. Hancock whipped around, looking her over then checked her wound, before stepping around the gate into the settlement his shotgun lifted for a fight. Madelyn tried to follow quickly, but shock delayed her reaction time. It took her a moment after entering the settlement to realize people were talking and Hancock was putting away his shotgun.

"… have killed you!" the Sentinel was saying, standing in front of a young man holding an impressive sniper rifle.

"You kill me? I nearly took your head off, Nate!" the man gestured to the hole in the gate, which brought his attention to the two bodies that came out form behind it. "Oh," he frowned, looking at the red blood dripping from between Madelyn's fingers. She hadn't even realized she had moved her hand from her mouth to the wound; it must have been a subconscious movement.

"He got Maddy in the arm, nothing serious," Hancock informed Nate. But the Sentinel spun around to face her, throwing his combat rifle over his shoulder where only the strap saved it from hitting the ground. Then he was in front of her, looking at her bleeding arm.

"How bad does it hurt?"

"I can move it," she answered and showed him. He nodded, looking at it with feathery fingers. Her grey eyes flickered to the man with the sniper rifle. He looked to be in his early twenties with shadowed eyes set under thick, dark eyebrows. His hat gave him a few more inches in height, not that he needed it as he was already quiet tall, but unlike the Sentinel, he wasn't overwhelmed in muscle, giving him a more lean appearance under the unique dusters he wore.

"Sorry about that," he said, slinging the rifle across his back.

She frowned and Nate smiled a little, "That's MacCready, he's a friend."

She nodded, not saying anything, instead, she looked back at the Sentinel. MacCready, the guy that the Minutemen were talking about back at the Castle. Somehow, this wasn't what she imagined. Most of the Minutemen were just… settlers, but this guy looked more official than that, and not just because of an obvious ego that was already making it hard to breathe. This guy had spent time with some militaristic faction, and by the way he held himself, it was probably mercenary.

"What happened here?" Hancock asked while Nate dug through his duffle bag and pulled out an herb that would close her wound in a few days. Then he began wrapping it.

"By the time I got here everyone was gone. There were some dead, I have a feeling the survivors were run off, not taken hostage. One raider was left here, but I'd killed him before I realized he was alone so I didn't have anyone to question." MacCready walked passed them to a cooler and opened it with his boot before bending and taking out a Nuka Cola. After kicking the blue box shut he offered it to her and she took it, looking up at him. He gave her an apologetic half grin, and went to sit down in a nearby chair. She popped the cap and pocketed it then slowly drank the flat soda. Nate straightened when he was finished wrapping her arm.

"We'll check nearby settlements, if anyone got out they would look for safety." Madelyn holstered her gun and fixed her sleeve. She was tired, but she could do some more walking, there were about two hours of sunlight left. "Oh, no, Maddy, you should stay here. I'd hate for that wound to get worse," Nate frowned at her. She looked up at him in shock. He was leaving her behind? The idea seemed to upset him just as much since his pale blue eyes looked sad, and his scared lips were turned down into a frown.

"I'm fine," she insisted, almost begging. Then the sniper stood up.

"I'll stay with her, better to have me here to pick off anyone before they get too close, right?" MacCready reached up and patted the rifle on his back.

"Okay, but only engage if they become a threat, stay hidden as long as you can," Nate grabbed the sniper's shoulder, holding it tightly, and MacCready nodded his understanding. Madelyn's expression was taken over by shock.

"You're leaving with the guy that shot me?" she breathed. Nate and MacCready looked at her and Hancock gave a muted chuckle, then stifled it with a cigarette he slipped between his lips.

"I wasn't aiming for you," the sniper protested her tone. She let out a sarcastic laugh that was a single 'hah'.

"No you were aiming at the Sentinel and missed," she snapped.

MacCready's thick brows pulled together, "Sent–? Oh, now I get it, she's Brotherhood. That explains the outfit," he turned back to Nate, his interest in her diminished. "What'd you do Nate? This has to be a punishment."

"Excuse you," Madelyn snapped, her voice catching the sniper's ear. She stepped between the Sentinel and the civilian. She had to look up at him more than she wished. She barely stood to his shoulders, putting her face right in his chest. The smell of him filled her nose as she took in the breath to fuel her defense. He smelled like sweat, testosterone, and gunpowder with a hint of something underneath, something like… mutfruit? "It is a Brother's duty to train the next generation of soldiers. I am _honored_ to call myself the Sentinel's Squire."

"Is he honored to call you his squire though?" the sniper raised an eyebrow at her, his eyes flickering across her face. They were cast into such a shadow, but she could just see the blue hints at their deepest parts, unable to be taken by the darkness.

"Yes, actually," Nate said, resting a hand on her shoulder. She tore her eyes from the sniper and looked up at Nate who was smiling. "She's the best squire I could have asked for."

"My mistake," MacCready said, raising his hands in surrender. "I'll be upstairs, I'm sure there's a nice look out point somewhere up there." He stepped back, looking down at her for a moment before returning his attention to the Sentinel.

"Thanks, MacCready," Nate said and the other man left, disappearing down the dark hallway toward a staircase.

"He seems like a dick," Madelyn frowned.

Nate laughed, seeming surprised by her language, and rubbed her hat, messing with her hair. She frowned a little and removed the cap when he stepped away. "RJ's harmless, really, to friends at least, he's a lot of talk, just don't steal his seat, I've seen him bloody a guy's nose over a chair." Hancock laughed and nodded, recalling the memory. She wondered how much history they all had. They seemed pretty well acquainted, but there was still a stiffness when he spoke to Nate that she wondered about.

"How did you two meet?"

"Oh, um," Nate's brows pulled together as he tried to remember.

Hancock laughed, "You and him shot that ghoul at the same time, remember?"

"Oh, yeah, I was really drunk…" Nate explained, smiling at the memory. "It was a glowing one, really nasty, and Hancock bet I couldn't one shot it from the rooftop we were on," the Sentinel gave a shrug. "We still can't decide who actually killed it."

"Wow," Madelyn raised an eyebrow at the two men.

"Anyway, we should get going, we'll split up and meet back here tomorrow night, with any news we have on survivors." Nate buried his fingers in her hair and then shook his hand back and forth, causing the bun at the back of her head to fall out.

"Sentinel!" she protested and caught the hair tie before it fell to the ground.

"Oh, relax, you're not on duty," Hancock smirked and patted her shoulder. She looked up at him, resisting the habit of shying away from his touch. He seemed to notice and smiled a little. She liked his smile, and grinned back. "See you in twenty-four, squirt," he said, and looked at Nate. "I'll take the east and south."

"I'll take the north and west then."

"Be safe," she told them and they both nodded.

Once they were gone Madelyn realized how tired she was. The Nuka Cola in her hand reminded her she wasn't alone, though, and that the sniper was upstairs. She didn't want to look at him right now, him and the staggering confidence that radiated off of him, or the way the wind caught the tails of his coat, giving every stance he held ten times the dramatic flare it deserved. What the hell was she saying, when did she even notice that?

Madelyn frowned and patted her forehead with her fist, trying to get the thought out of her mind with the gentle abuse. She had to find a distraction, something to keep her from thinking about him. Taking in a long breath and letting it out through her mouth so that her lips made a rather funny flapping noise, she put her hands on her hips and looked around.

She finally had a moment to really take in what the structure looked like. It was three stories high, with the first level as sort of basement without anything of interest, and the second primarily a community level with shops, venders, and seating all in the covered space like an indoor town. That was where she was now, on the second floor in a restaurant looking place. She noticed a radio on a counter and flipped it on. Pistol Packin' Mama rang through the speakers, and she smiled, she liked this song. There was a Nuka Cola machine in a corner next to a jukebox, and about ten nice white metal tables were sitting evenly spaced around the room, and each table had two short, white metal chairs with red cushions sitting across from each other. All but one that sat by the stairs that led up to the room by the front gate. Two destroyed turrets smoked from their positions on thin balconies above the gate, they looked to be the only defense for this side.

Madelyn walked down the hall to an open area with a staircase leading up to the third level, and from here she could see another set of stairs above that. There was another entrance here, but this one was destroyed, the gate was half the size of the other and still smoldering from when it had been on fire. Two more destroyed turrets sat here, with a burnt guard post between them, but these looked beyond repair compared to the two at the other entrance. Madelyn made her way up the stairs then, and with a squint down the hall she was able to see what looked to be bedrooms in a hotel fashion and another sitting area that would be right above the restaurant downstairs.

It was very… homey, almost like the Prydwen in a way, and she found herself smiling as a soft, lovely song came on the radio. 'One More Tomorrow' she thought it was. She swayed a little with her steps and climbed the next level, which was the open roof. The view was amazing as the sun set in the distance and the stars started to pierce the colors of the sky. "Oh, wow," she whispered, looking straight up and smiling. It was just like the views she had from the Prydwen.

"You act like you've never seen the sky before."

Madelyn had forgotten all about the sniper. He was sitting on the roof, his rifle taken apart and laid out in front of him. Not many settlers took apart and reassembled their guns for fun while waiting for action. In fact, it was almost cocky to do so, he didn't just think he could rebuild it before shit hit the fan; he _knew_ he could. "Just been a little while since I took the time to," she walked over to him, looking at the pieces through the dimming light.

MacCready didn't seem to have anything to say to that, so he looked at the gun also. Then, in a flash, he was putting it together, his deft hands picking pieces that she could barely tell apart from the roof. She must have had a shocked expression because he glanced up at her, and smirked, then rested the finished rifle on his knee, looked through the scope, and fired in a swift movement. Madelyn looked off to see what he'd shot and an explosion in the distance ruptured. "Super Mutant Suicider," he explained and stood. She raised her brows, looking across the river and squinted to try to get a clearer image, but the second explosion was easy to see. "And that was a car."

"Cool, I thought the Sentinel said not to engage unless we were compromised," she returned her grey eyes to the sniper.

"Well, if you think stopping a Suicider in this close knit hive is for the best, I'll just start up some generators and turn the lights on." He lifted the gun over his head and rested it on his shoulders, then hung his hands over it to hold it in place. The stance made him look bigger, thicker through the shoulders, and stronger in the chest. Her eyes followed the V neck of his coat down to his belted waist which was decorated with a set of binoculars and pouches for ammo based on the bullet garters he wore on his left leg and the two extra tucked into the band of his hat. His other thigh also had a pouch, but this one was bigger, so it probably held something like a stimpak or some other aid.

Madelyn met his eyes, and shrugged, "Okay, but on your way to turning on the lights, you should stop by the bathroom and wipe that asshole off your face." The sniper's brows rose, he hadn't expected that from her, and to be honest, she hadn't either. Where had that even come from? Oh, God, it was Hancock, he was rubbing off on her. One too many witty one-liners from that ghoul and she was making up her own with little provocation. "Fuck, I'm sorry, I'm not sure where that came from…."

"You don't really get how come-backs work do you? Usually you don't apologize for stumping the other person." But he smiled, and she found herself looking at his lips. They were tight, almost pursed in a way, and surrounded by shadow, circling his mouth down to his chin with a light dusting of facial hair that was just barely a step above stubble. His upper lip was less than half the size of the bottom one, but when he smiled he showed off straight, healthy teeth. "You stare often?"

She blinked and met his questioning gaze. "Sorry, just getting distracted by that asshole, you might really have to go get rid of it."

"I'll wait for you to apologize," he smirked. She let out a sigh and looked away. "Come on, get downstairs, this isn't a good position anyway," MacCready lead the way to the staircase. Madelyn followed, watching as he walked how the jacket swayed with his movement.

"So, who killed the ghoul? You or Nate?"

"Oh? It's Nate now is it?" the sniper paused at the bottom of the stairs to give her a playful smirk, begging for a come back.

"He killed it then," she decided, passing him without looking his way and headed over to a sitting area that over looked the entrance that had been burnt up.

"Should have seen that coming," he said, sitting on a three-person couch, made from airplane seats, in the middle spot. She sat across from him in a two person, matching loveseat.

"Maybe your eyes aren't as good as you thought."

"Man, you're almost too good at that," MacCready leaned back, his sniper rifle lying across his lap. "I liked it better when you apologized."

She had to resist the urge to say sorry. She really wanted to, but as she managed to swallow the need. They sat in silence for a while, listening to the radio drift in from the floor below them. It was just barely audible over the sound of the city, air weaving between the buildings, and the distant sound of gunfire. Madelyn found herself staring off into the night between the buildings toward the car that had blown up. She had all but forgotten the Nuka Cola in her had, so she drank the rest of it and sat the bottle at her side. Gradually the feeling of being watched was too much and she glanced sideways at the sniper.

MacCready was looking at her, his face impossible to read from darkness and it's being stoic, but his eyes were on her. "You stare often?" she asked, using his words from earlier.

The man stretched, his lean arms reaching up high and backward to bend his back. "You just remind me of someone is all."

"Who?" she asked, her brow lifting to show her question.

He paused for a moment, then shook his head, "Just someone. Listen, you should get some rest, it's going to be a long night, and I'll need you up during the day to keep watch." He waved for her to go. "Find a bed, sleep. I'll wake you up when it's your turn."

Madelyn wanted to object, but her tired eyes betrayed her, and a yawn threatened her jaw. She clamped her mouth closed, but her lips fought her. MacCready didn't seem to notice the expression, or if he did he didn't say anything. "Okay," she said and stood. "I'll just be in that room then," she gestured to the closest room. He nodded and moved positions, sitting where she had been, giving him a better view out of the ally.

It didn't take Madelyn long to feel the weight of travel. She'd slept, yeah, but on the ground or in a sleeping bag at best. This was a real bed. Like, lifted from the ground with a clean mattress bed. She slowly stripped off the layers of her Brotherhood Squire's uniform, neatly folding it as she stacked it on the dresser. She remained in her underclothing: a pair of boy shorts underwear and tank top, both army green. Normally being dressed down like this where others could see her didn't bother her as she lived in the barracks and there was no such thing as privacy on the Prydwen. But now she thought about MacCready when he came in to wake her up for her turn to watch. Maybe she could wake up before he came to get her, or she could sleep in her uniform.

No, it was fine, it wasn't like she had anything to hide. He was what? A hand full of years older than her? He'd had to have seen a girl before. Whatever, she shouldn't care.

But she did. And as she lied down on the bed, Madelyn thought about that sniper sitting not twenty feet away, with only a thin wooden wall between them. Somehow, she felt safer now than she had since leaving the Prydwen.

* * *

When Madelyn woke she was cuddled against a comfy pillow she didn't remember having when she went to bed. Weird. Where did that come from? She slowly sat up and looked around the room suddenly remembering she where she was and that she was supposed to have been woken up by MacCready so that he could get some rest. The room was well lit from light streaming in from the holes in the walls. It had to be around eight or nine in the morning. Why hadn't he woken her up?

Madelyn rolled out of the bed and started to get dressed but the clothes smelled and she frowned. She needed to clean them. Normally she would have gotten another uniform while this one was sent to the wash room on the Prydwen and cleaned. She hadn't thought this squiring mission through...

A thought occurred to her and she pulled a drawer open. The clothing there was sorted but it was all clothing, nothing armored. Then she opened the second drawer. This one had a drifter's coat and matching wares. Good, they looked like they might be small enough to fit her.

A few moments later and she was rolling up her sleeves and tucking her pant legs into her combat boots. "Awesome," she smiled, looking down at herself. Now for that hair, she reached up trying to take the beast but it refused to follow orders. The whole of her hair was almost as thick as one of her wrists when in a ponytail and right now it was proving to her why she never slept with it lose. "Whatever, I'll just cut you off," she threatened the locks, but she knew better. She loved all of her hair, and the idea of cutting it short, even if that would make it more manageable, was just an empty threat.

Surprisingly no comment came from the other room. Madelyn had imagined that the sniper would have said something witty based on last night's interactions. She peeked her head around the wall that separated the two of them, and tried to locate the man. Light filled the room from the balcony and almost burned her eyes with how much of a change it was to the room she'd been sleeping it, now this room felt rather dim. But she didn't see anyone sitting in the chairs.

"Hey?" she called out softly as pinpricks trickled up her spin, giving her a cold shudder despite the warm morning air. "You there?" Absently she grabbed her ten-millimeter and stepped out of the room.

Madelyn checked the sitting area again and noticed her Nuka Cola bottle was gone, and there was no trace anyone had spent the night out here. With the newfound stress she began chewing on her bottom lip, pulling on the skin, taking off the first few layers with each tug. Where could he have gone? She turned around, making her way up the hall to the other bedrooms. They were each like the one she had slept in, varying only in set up, as each of them had a single bed with one piece of additional furniture. The sitting area here had a red couch sitting across from a blue one with matching chairs on either side making a nice little gathering place. There was also another balcony here with an outdoor sitting space that over looked a table and two chairs from the restaurant downstairs. She looked over the side here, noting the crops in the dirt on the first level. She remembered it being nothing of interest, but that was probably because that level was where all the cooking and farming happened.

Cooking… she smelt something, a fire, and something cooking.

Madelyn's eyebrows pulled together and she tried to find where the smell was coming from. Whatever it was, it was two levels down, so she had to run back to the staircase and go down another level then find a set of stairs to take her to the first floor. Her boots weren't exactly silent, but she did her best on the hollowed sounding wood floor. This place had to be loud when there was a bunch of people walking around.

Hitting the last step on the second floor, Madelyn turned around to find the stairs that would take her down another level, but she froze where she stood. Two Super Mutants were standing in front of the ally, talking to each other about puny humans; neither had noticed her yet. Slowly, she sidestepped. She would go down to the first level at the other end of the complex.

As quietly as she could, Madelyn hugged the wall and snuck to the restaurant side of the floor. The smell of food filled her nose and she winced at the growl of her stomach. She had only had noodles and Nuka Cola yesterday. Damn it, she had to eat something, but those Super Mutants would probably eat her if she didn't do something quick. Slowly, she slipped down the stairs to the first level. The gate on this side had been closed and chained up. When had that happened? She raised a brow at it for a moment, then turned around to look at the first level.

A cooking station was fired up under a concrete overhang that had been converted into a kitchen. A pan was sitting over the fire with a mirelurk egg scrambled up in it cooking. MacCready then stepped into view from where he'd been standing by the wall out of sight at this angle. He pushed the eggs around with a wooden spoon, and then grabbed the pot off the fire with a mitted hand.

Did he even know what was happening? That there were Super Mutants not fifty yards away. "Hey," she called softly, walking up as quietly as she could. He glanced at her, surprised.

He looked exhausted, dark circles under his eyes, and a yawn already parting his lips. He sat the eggs down, "Oh, hey, I was just about to–"

"Shh!" she whisper-shouted and ran over to him. He was talking over his yawn, which made his voice carry.

"What?" he turned around, looking at her with a slightly annoyed expression that was ruined by his droopy eyes that were almost black in how dark they were without sleep.

"There are Super Mutants at the other gate," she whispered and he gave a chuckle, looking away from her. "I'm not kidding," she frowned at him, resisting the urge to slap his arm. The sniper just divided the eggs evenly onto two plates.

"Of course you're not," he sighed and handed her a plate, holding the other in front of him as he leaned over and grabbed his sniper rifle from the corner. She looked at the eggs and then followed behind him as he made his way, not so quietly to the other end of the complex. Was he going to shoot them one handed? Both? Was he nuts?

"What're you doing?"

"I'ma kill me a couple Super Mutants, apparently," he snapped. She paused. They were going to die. What was she supposed to do? Kill them herself with a _ten-millimeter?_ No, but he was defiantly going to get the two of them killed if he didn't just snipe the mutants.

"Hey, can you just–"

"Nope," he turned the corner and lifted his sniper rifle with one arm, supporting it awkwardly against his shoulder. "Hey!" he called and the mutants spun around. One grabbed a pipe rifle, and the other a board. MacCready looked through his scope and then fired in a scary quick action. The bullet flew from the gun as it pushed back against his shoulder, and went right through the mutant's head via his left eye socket. Down went the one with the pipe rifle. "Here, pull that lever back," he turned to her, holding the gun so that she could ready him for another shot. The other Super Mutant cried out, throwing his arms and head back with the sound and then charged them. "Come on, Maddy, I don't wanna spill my eggs."

She frowned at him saying that name, and grabbed the action on his rifle, lifting it up and slinging it back so that the burning shell flung out. Then she pulled it back forward, roughly, and he pulled the gun from her hand, raising it so that it pointed at the mutant's head as it close in on them. The brute's arms were raised with the board behind him read to swing, but MacCready pulled the trigger and the mutant's head snapped back and its body went stiff. He was already leaving, heading upstairs before the body hit the ground. "Great, now I got blood in my eggs."

"Boo hoo," she grunted and holstered her ten-millimeter. Then she walked around the corpses, looking for anything of use. Awkwardly she held the eggs in one hand as she bent down to loot the bodies of ammo and spare caps. She was collecting quiet the purse. She had to be coming up on fifty caps now. Not that she really needed it at the moment, but she hated that Nate had to buy her everything. At least now she could buy something for herself.

By the time she joined the sniper on the third level at the sitting area her eggs were cold and MacCready was asleep. She sat across from him in the two-person couch that had the better view. He was slumped, his long legs stretched out in front of him and his arms limp at his sides, head back and mouth sack. His hat had fallen off, onto the floor behind him. She ate her eggs with her fingers; a leg tucked under her as she looked at him and listened to the music drifting in from downstairs.

Without realizing it, Madelyn was softly singing along with the familiar songs. "…Like the window that shakes the bough, He moves me with a smile, The difficult I'll do right now, The impossible will take a little while…. I say I'll care forever, And I mean forever, If I have to hold up the sky, Crazy, he calls me, Sure I'm crazy, Crazy in love am I…."

Sometimes she missed the Capital Wasteland. The thought always came to her when she was listening to the radio. "Damn, you were much better than this guy, Three Dog," she smiled at the memory of the disc jockey. Songs streamed in with the occasional news update by the sheepish DJ that needed a shot of psycho just to stop his stutter.

Boredom sat in. Madelyn shifted her weight and then lied down on the couch, and then sat back up, and then lied on her stomach, and then her side, and then the floor, and then stood at the balcony looking off into the distance. I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire hummed in the air. She was going to fall asleep if she didn't find something to do.

"How the hell did you stay up all night?" she glanced sideways at the man. He and shifted slightly in his sleep, his head bending to the now, and his arms flopped in his lap which was spread wide because he'd pulled his feet closer to him but his knees were now fanned out. Why hadn't he just gone off to a bed? She frowned and walked over to him, gentle taking hold of his sniper rifle with the intention of moving it off his lap so it wouldn't eventually fall. Big mistake.

MacCready snapped awake the moment the weight of the sniper rifle was lifted from his lap. He grabbed it and had it pointed at her in a swift movement she wasn't prepared for. She kept her fear to herself, and lifted her hands. "Gonna shoot me again?" she asked, raising a brow.

The sniper frowned at her. He'd only had maybe two hours of sleep, but he looked far more rested now. He lowered the weapon and sat it on the ground next to him. Then he rubbed his face, his dirty hands pushing around the sweat and grime that already called that particular part of him home. Then he reached up for the hat that wasn't there and ran his fingers through his greasy hair. It looked like it might be brown, but it was dirty, so she couldn't be sure if it had been blonde at one point and too much abuse had permanently stained it. "It _was_ an accident," he defended himself.

"Doesn't mean you get off easy," she turned away from him and went back to the balcony. Absently she touched the wound on her arm, and then her fingers drifted up to her chin. An old scar resided there, splitting her soft chin at a harsh angle, but years had healed it to a rough, faded line. Not far from it was an old burn that wasn't even noticeable until pointed out on the left, underside of her jaw. This wound had a twin on her forehead just below her hairline, but only her and her brother remembered them now, as the scars were almost indistinguishable from her skin. She thought the freckles she sported helped that, making it hard to focus on the different tones of her skin because of the dots sprinkled across her face, primarily over the bridge of her nose with some paler ones on her forehead and a few that fell below her mouth.

MacCready appeared at her side, standing tall and stretching to get the stiffness out of his muscles from sleeping upright. He let out a grunt and turned around, leaning against a beam to look at her, his arms crossed.

"You should go back to sleep," she said without removing her eyes from the very boring river, visible from here. His eyes remained on her though, and she frowned a little, leaning down against the half wall that kept you from walking right off the balcony. "Thinking about that person I remind you of?"

"Yeah," he breathed, sounding more upset than she expected, and before she could look up at him he was leaving her. He went to the bedroom she'd slept in and she could faintly hear the sound of the springs protest his weight. She felt bad, then, wondering who it was that she looked like that would make him react like that. Probably someone close to him… probably someone who'd died...


	8. Road Trip

Nate rubbed his forehead. The headache burning behind his eyes and up into his frontal lobe was enough to kill lesser men. This is probably what doctors meant when they asked if he had crippled his head. He would have to tell anyone who asked some bullshit about getting hit in the head with a board by a Super Mutant because explaining that he'd tripped over a piece of broken concrete in the road and went head long into a car was far too embarrassing to even tell Hancock.

Spending the last twenty-four hours running from Hangman's Ally to Cambridge Police Station, then Greygarden, Oberland Station, and Vault 81 really wore him out. All Nate was going to want to do was sleep when he finally made it back to Madelyn and MacCready. He felt bad for leaving her there, but Hancock and him would be far quicker on their own. And given the day he'd had, he was happy he didn't have to worry about the squire. He'd more than once had to play dead or sneak out of situations that could have easily gotten him and whatever company he had killed.

All for nothing, though, no one had claimed Hangman's Ally as their home, leaving Nate to believe that any survivors went Hancock's way or something had happened to them. He wanted to stay optimistic despite the pit in his stomach. It was just like at the Vault, he was going against his gut, but he refused to assume the worst until he heard word from Hancock.

A low, grumbling thunder rolled through the clouds above him and Nate frowned. Green mist had been mixing in with the grey for a while now, but he'd hoped he was headed away from the radiation storm. But it was right ahead of him, over the Boston area, above Diamond City and Hangman's Ally. "Damn," he whispered to himself and reached into his duffle bag to grab a Rad-X from the bottle. He hated taking pills, it always took him half a bottle of water to get one of the damn things down and these were about as thick as his thumb.

Throwing the can of purified water off to the side, Nate burped and grimaced at the taste of watered down stomach acid that fought the pill that entered his belly. He was going to need some alcohol tonight, he was not in any mood to deal with any shit. Absently he realized that he had left Madelyn with a complete stranger, and MacCready of all people. Oh God… he hoped that they hadn't killed each other….

Hangman's Ally was quiet from where he stood. No one seemed to be keeping watch, which made the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. Where had Maddy and R.J. gone?

Nate slowly entered the settlement and passed the destroyed turrets on the ground floor. He would have to get enough supplies to fix all six of them or the settlement wouldn't do much good defending itself. He was just coming around the corner to the hall that led to the other end of the complex when he heard voices.

"What _are_ you doing?" MacCready's voice was more than shocked.

"I'm _cooking_ ," Madelyn replied.

"More like trying to kill us, move over."

Nate peered into the kitchen to find Hancock leaning back in a folding chair with his feet kicked up on the wall and his hat down on his face. He was either trying to ignore the other two or sleeping. Either way, he looked quite comfortable with his arms behind his head. Nate let out a happy breath. They were all alive and all fine. He felt better now, his worry drifting off like the smoke from the dinner Madelyn was attempting to make.

"Hail Sentinel!" Madelyn announced when she saw Nate standing here. MacCready scoffed.

"Hi, Nate," he said, his eyes on the back of Madelyn's head. Madelyn looked… different. She wasn't wearing her squire's uniform, instead she was in… drifter clothing? Where had she even found that? Why had she changed clothes? But he stopped himself from asking because she didn't throw a glare at MacCready like he'd expected her to when he used the intimate greeting.

"Hey," he said, looking between them then at Hancock who was pushing the front of his hat up out of his face so he could look at him.

"I have to talk to you," the ghoul said, and MacCready frowned.

"Is it about the settlers?"

"I couldn't find any," Hancock said, clearly that wasn't what it was about.

"Me either," Nate said, frowning, and then Hancock's expression changed. Whatever he'd wanted to talk about wasn't about the settlers. He'd hoped that Nate had something positive to say, and the pit in Nate's stomach grew because he'd hoped the same thing.

"Well, either way, nothing much we can do about that now. It's dark and I'm as beat as a provisioner's Brahmin." The ghoul stood and slid passed Madelyn and R.J. stepping up to Nate and giving him a look that the General knew all too well.

"When will food be done?" Nate asked, looking away from the Mayor of Goodneighbor.

"Ah… give me an hour," MacCready looked down at the food and then at Nate, giving him a slight tip of the chin telling him to go ahead. MacCready and Nate weren't exactly best friends, but they were pretty close. He'd helped save his son, Duncan, from a nasty illness that threatened to make the widower fatherless. Nate knew the pain of losing a child, and he wouldn't let that happen to anyone that he cared about. But they were on two different fields. MacCready always leaned more toward the mercenary way of doing a job while Nate had the in-born military need. And because of R.J.'s distrust of the Brotherhood, it really put a damper on their friendship. But time had worn the divide.

"We'll be back in an hour then."

Hancock was already headed up the stairs to the second, and then third level. Nate had helped build this settlement and because of that he knew the lay out better than anyone. And one night he'd decided that an almost unreachable nook would be his little get away, and that was where Hancock was headed now. Nate's lips pulled up at the corners and he followed the red coat.

John disappeared around the corner, and Nate followed quickly, coming up behind him and wrapping his arms around the other man's chest. "Oh really," the ghoul breathed and Nate buried his face his shoulder, their hats clashing and both eventually falling to the ground.

Nate nibbled on his ear and grazed his teeth along the lobe before alternating kisses and bites down the ghoul's neck.

"Mmm, gonna get yourself in trouble, Natie," John growled. The Sentinel started to pull off the ghoul's clothing, one article at a time. "Why're you dragging this out?"

"I only get an hour alone with you, I don't know when that'll happen again," Nate looked into John's black eyes. The ghoul turned around, still in his pants.

"Honestly, I think I'm just worried our little squire will pay us another visit and then somebody won't be in the mood anymore," he punctuated the statement by grabbing Nate at the metal plate in front of his manhood. "That's right, always forget you're wearing a cup in this uniform."

"Take it off me then," he said, his voice low and John smirked.

"Oh, I plan on it."

And oh did he. Torturing Nate with how long it took. It was as if Nate had taken a shot of jet and everything had slowed down, but he knew it was just John giving him shit for wanting to take things a little slower this time. He blamed it on his need for at least a _little_ romance. But the ghoul was more than willing to comply, as when he got to Nate's trousers he paused and bent in front of him, kneeling with his face just an inch from his waist, and oh did he love the view.

"You drag this out any more and I'm not going to need you to even touch me," Nate whispered, his voice almost a growl.

"Oh, you want me to move faster? I thought you wanted to take your time," Hancock looked up at him, feigning innocence.

"Please, John," he whispered, his blue eyes begging the man.

"Oh, well, since you said please." The ghoul pulled his trousers down and his erection slipped out. His length average, but he had a girth to him that he was proud of. John's hand grabbed it at the base, and then he looked up, meeting his eyes. With his tongue flat, he drew a wet line from balls to head. Nate stepped out of his pants, now wearing only his boots, and spread his legs, giving himself a better stance.

"Jesus," Nate whispered.

"It's John, how many times do I have to remind you?"

"Shut up…"

John's mouth took Nate's throbbing head and he threw his back, a hand reaching for something to hold onto. He ended up only being able to grab onto the wall behind him, his fingers slipping between some cracks. The ghoul dipped his head, taking in most of his length with a muted gag sound, then slipped back to the top where he swallowed the excess saliva in his mouth and licked the head and the underside of Nate's shaft.

The ghoul bent down lower, giving him long, slow strokes as he mouthed his ball, sending a new sensation up the General's spine. He grunted and let out a please noise that encouraged John, so he moved quicker, his strokes starting to focus right around the head where Nate was his most sensitive. Then he returned his mouth the tip, sucking on the head and using both of his hands to give Nate an overwhelming sensation.

He knew that he would be able to hold it back much longer, Hancock was going to finish him off in record time, and based on the smile in those black eyes, he knew it as well. "I fuckin' love you, John," Nate's hand on the wall gripped tighter, rippling the muscles of his torso up his arm. Prewar, Nate hadn't been this fit, and he'd never felt the need to be, but nowadays, with little food and constant exercise it was almost too easy to maintain this Atlas like figure. One of John's hands ghosted up his lover's abdomen, reaching as high as he could.

His fingers massaged the muscles the found padding his ribs and the ghoul focused more on what he was doing. His eyes were trying to maintain contact, but they drifted closed in concentration. The General closed his eyes, the feeling bringing him over the edge, and he released the breath he didn't realize he was holding as he exploded into John's throat. The ghoul positioned himself on Nate's head so he could maneuver the come into an easier position to swallow. Nate watched the other man as he milked him for the last drop of his seed.

"I think you just sucked the headache right out of me," Nate smiled, his hand running over John's head. The ghoul stood and smirked.

"Do I get a reward?" Nate bent and wrapped his arms around the smaller man, lifting him up and then walked him over to the bed. "Put your hat back on, General."

"Yes, sir," Nate stood and saluted him the Brotherhood way. The ghoul's flag belt moved as he grew exited, watching Nate bend at the waist to grab the hat off the ground and place it on his head.

"Mmm, much better," he supported himself on his elbows, giving the large man a very sexy view. "Get on over here, Natie," he beckoned him with taunting fingers. The General came up to the bed and awaited his next command. "On your knees," he paused until the task was completed, then added, "Make me come all over that pretty face of yours."

Nate's agile fingers had John's erection free in a breath. The ghoul's prize appendage was long, narrow, and had a slight bend to the right. Their eyes locked as the Sentinel's tongue traced lines from the bottom to the top of the bent shaft. After it was slicked up, Nate's hand slid up and down the length and he sucked on the head. He refused to look away from John's face as the ghoul smile and groaned in pleasure. "Fuck, Nate, that feels–"

He tilted his head and sucked on the underside of the shaft right below the head and Hancock wasn't able to finish his sentence. When he took it back into his mouth he hummed, making sure to press the head against the back of his tongue just before it could reach his throat. The vibration always drove John crazy, and this time it was enough to send him over the edge. "Shit," the ghoul breathed, bending forward as he shot into Nate's throat. Nate pulled his mouth away and continued to stroke the ghoul so that it landed on his face just how John had wanted it. "Damn it, I was trying to last longer than you."

Nate straightened up and grabbed a shirt from a dresser and used it to clean his face. "You should know better than that."

"Yeah, yeah," the ghoul waved a hand at him, trying to steady his breathing as he sat up. Then he stood and buckled his pants back up.

"What're you doing?"

"What? I…" John glanced at him, a wrinkled brow lifted to express his confusion. "Nothing, I guess…."

Nate rubbed his beard with the shirt to get the last of the sticky liquid from the hair, and then came back over. He bent and kissed John, his nose pressed against the skin of his cheek. One of his thick arms circling the smaller man while his other hand rested on the side of his neck, holding Hancock there so that he could kiss him longer, deeper. They tasted themselves on each other's lips, wiping all fatigue from their minds.

"I love you, Nathaniel," John whispered against his lips.

"I love you, too, John," Nate's lips moved to the other man's jaw, then down his neck. Nate was so much larger than John that when he did this he had to duck his head and bend down slightly. If a third person were to have been watching it might have been comical, but to them it was only love.

"Mmm, so affectionate…" Hancock smiled, leaning back so he could look at the man holding him.

"I could stop."

"Never," John smirked and kissed Nate's forehead.

* * *

"I bet I'll beat you guys to Sanctuary, even with the stop at Tenpines," MacCready was saying, leaning against a brick wall. They had fixed up Hangman's Ally best they could and called in for some Minutemen to hold it for a few weeks before they had settlers come back in, just incase whatever happened to the first group came back. MacCready had been given another assignment, this one at Tenpines Bluff.

Madelyn had made a funny noise when it happened, almost like she knew it would, or something, but when Nate gave her a questioning look she just shook her head and chewed on the mirelurk that R.J. had made. Now she seemed to be purposefully standing a distance away making Nate wonder if the ex-gunner had said or done something to upset her. Suddenly Nate was eyeing the sniper with a suspicious stare.

Hancock elbowed MacCready in the side when he passed, catching the guy off guard. "I'll take that bet, twenty caps says we slap Sturges's ass first."

"Shi–" R.J. winced and restarted his sentence, "Well if that's the wager make it two hundred. If I'm having that block of testosterone chase me I want it to be worth my while."

"Deal," Hancock stuck his arm out and MacCready grabbed it, sealing the deal.

Madelyn let out a chuckle, and Nate glanced over at her to see her looking between the two who were now squeezing each other a little too hard, waiting for the other to submit. "Come on, Hancock, we need to get going if we're going to beat him."

Madelyn looked at him now, her dark brow lifted. "He's going out of the way isn't he?"

"Yeah, but he's moving alone, and that means he can go faster," Nate explained, starting to leave the ghoul who was still locked at arm. "And MacCready is… sort of known for being able to get more ground covered than anyone else in our ranks."

"So he's a Minuteman?"

"Well, now he is, yeah," Nate thought about it for a minute. If they stopped paying him he would probably not stay, but then again, neither would most of the Minutemen they had now. It was a job now, no longer just volunteers with good intentions.

"What was he before? He looks… like he did time with mercenaries or military."

She had a good eye, he was surprised she noticed. "Yeah, he ran with the Gunners a while ago, before I'd met him, and he's been a hired gun since, but when we got him a place in Sanctuary he decided that the life as a Minuteman was just as good and started helping us out."

"How sweet," she said, but her tone told him she was being sarcastic. He suddenly wondered how their time alone had gone.

"How's your arm?"

"Fine, still stings a bit, but that's just when pressure is put on it," she explained, glancing at it. It was odd seeing her without her squire's uniform on and her hair in a lazy ponytail instead of a bun lifted off her collar. She had a lot of hair, the tie seemed like it would bust at any moment.

"Those clothes can't be comfortable," he said, they didn't fit her well at all.

"Well, they don't smell like my uniform did, so…" she shrugged and adjusted the pack on her shoulders.

"We'll stop and get you something that fits you better, Maddy."

"It's fine, really, I don't mind." She pushed up the sleeves that threated to over flow her gloved hands. Of course she didn't mind, but he did. She wasn't going to be helpful if she was tripping over herself because her pants were too big.

"We'll stop and get you something that fits better," he repeated and put an end to that. He didn't miss her hands balling into fists and he suddenly worried he'd over stepped. He thought she would like a new outfit.

"Damn, that kid moves fast," Hancock huffed when he reached them.

"Kid?" Madelyn raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, kid, like you, he just celebrated his twenty-third birthday, right, Natie?" John asked and Nate nodded, remembering the occasion. It had been about two months ago, and Mama Murphy had demand they make a big deal about it. It was mostly for show for Duncan as they had missed his birthday and the little three and a half year old loved watching the parties.

"Well, you have to think about it like this, when Hancock and I were your age–"

"Fuck, when Nate was your age, Maddy, the world was green with life not rads."

"Okay, that's not what I meant, asshole," Nate elbowed the ghoul and Madelyn giggled. "My point is we're old enough to be your parents, and R.J. is only a few years older than you, so," he shrugged. "Makes him a kid."

"Huh," she thought about that for a moment and Nate wondered what was going through her mind.

"Jesus, Nate, you need to get that Pipboy back on your arm, at least it was nice to listen to the radio while we walked."

"I know, I just…" he didn't like to always be reminded of Vault 111. The Pipboy and his Vault suit were the two things that made him think about it more than anything else, and since he didn't really need it anymore he left it at home with the other things he only looked at in his moments of weakness. He had neglected to tell Hancock this, though, so he suffered the consequences.

"We could play a game," Madelyn said.

"Like what?" Hancock asked, resting an arm on her shoulder. She shrugged him off, smiling.

"Well, there are plenty. I like the game One Word Stories. We go around a say one word to make a story."

"I don't get it."

Nate smiled, "I've heard of that, yeah. I would say something like 'Once' and then Maddy would say 'upon' then you'd say 'a' and I'd say 'time' and then we keep going. It can get really interesting."

"Sounds like a game I'll need a couple _mentats_ for," the ghoul grinned and produced a tin of the drug from somewhere on his person.

"Oh, no fair," Madelyn waved a hand in front of his face to keep him from taking any of the pills. "At least try it without them first."

"Fine, who starts?"

"I will," Madelyn smiled. "Then Nate will go then you and then me again. When you want a sentence to end just say period as your word," she added.

"Okay, go."

"Once," Madelyn smiled.

"Upon."

"Fuck."

Madelyn and Nate both looked over at the ghoul who looked back at them completely seriously. "A," she tried to get them back on track.

"Sheep," Nate smirked.

"Period," announced Hancock.

"Okay, I regret this," Madelyn said, waving both of her hands in defeat.

"Oh no, no, I think I get it now," Hancock laughed. "Okay, come on, go again."

"Okay, fine," she thought for a moment. "There."

"Once," Nate tried again.

"Was," Hancock added.

"A," Maddy said.

Nate thought for a moment then decided on, "Ghoul."

"Me," Hancock laughed, and then waved for Maddy to go next which threw her off.

"Who."

"Lived," Nate smirked.

"In," Hancock prompted, looking at Maddy hopefully.

"Goodneighbor," the squire sighed.

"And," Nate added, ending the ghoul's triumphant laugh.

"Did," he countered, his black eyes flickering to the girl.

"A," Maddy tried, and Nate nodded, knowing where it was going.

"Lot."

"Of drugs!" Hancock finished, throwing his arms up and cheering.

"Hancock you only get one word…" Madelyn smiled. But they went on like that for some time. After a few hours the sentences got to be rather weird, and 'Blue pie is my favorite cake' became a quite laughable topic for them.

"Did you hear that?" Hancock paused, looking around. He grabbed his shotgun and narrowed his eyes. They were about half an hour north of Greygarden at this point, nearly halfway back to Sanctuary. At this particular crossroads there was nothing of interest, so the ghoul's outburst caught the other two off guard.

"What?" Nate grabbed his combat rifle and held it ready. Madelyn held up her ten-millimeter just how she'd been shown. Nate loved how quick of a learner she was.

"I thought it was–" Hancock started and was cut off by a bullet tearing open his shoulder. "Fuck!" he went down.

Madelyn turned toward the direction of the gunfire. "Raiders!" she called and ran over to a car. She took cover and then aimed carefully into the distance and started to fire. Nate watched her for just a moment as she worked out how to aim the gun then scooped up Hancock, running over to Madelyn's side as more rapid gunfire rained down on them. "One of them has power armor!" she yelled over the new sound of a minigun firing up.

"Shit," Nate looked at Hancock who was grabbing his crippled shoulder. Digging through his duffle bag, Nate found a stimpak and jammed it into Hancock's abdomen.

The minigun's fire ticked off the car doubling the volume of combat, but then there was the sound of ignition. "Maddy, get away from the car!" Nate yelled and stood Hancock on his feet to get the ghoul moving.

Madelyn gasped and started running west, Nate followed eyeing the spatter of trees that would serve as a decent cover until the raiders got closer. The car was on fire, but had yet to actually explode. Hancock groaned and got off his ass, looking around. "Shit, my gun," he gestured with his chin to the weapon he'd accidently thrown right under the car.

"Damn it," Nate breathed and reached into his duffle bag. "Here," he pushed his combat shotgun into his hands.

"Oh, I see," Hancock smirked, leaning against the tree Nate bent around so he could get a better shot at the raiders. "Been trying to get me to use this thing for months."

"It's faster, and now you need it," Nate said, looking up at him with a superior smile.

"Fine," the ghoul sighed.

Nate looked around for Madelyn and found her a tree over trying to put a new magazine into her ten-millimeter. "Maddy, honey, turn it around, it should slide right in," he shouted as the sound of the minigun disappeared. They were reloading. Nate grabbed his sniper rifle and lied on the ground, looking through the scope, passed the grass and tried to find the raider in the power armor.

There he was. The thing was terrifying with the makeshift armor welded to the frame in a fashion that hurt Nate deep down. But the armor wasn't 100%, and it had many gaps. Nate found a gap and fired. The right arm of the raider exploded in the armor and he dropped the minigun. "Minigun down," he announced and aimed again.

Hancock rushed out from behind the tree and took out two raiders that had been sneaking up to them. Madelyn was doing well, taking her time despite the pressure, and firing only when she thought she could hit her target. Nate couldn't pay attention well enough to know if she was managing to take anyone out, but he did see a couple raiders drop before he got them.

As soon as the raider in the power armor took Hancock's shotgun to the facial region, the others ran off. Raiders were funny that way, sometimes taking the death of their leader well, and other times they ran off with their tails between their legs.

"Should we hunt them down? Keep them from coming after us?"

"They're not going in the direction we want," Nate sighed, sitting against the tree to reload his guns before returning them to his duffle bag. The car took this moment to explode. Both Madelyn and Nate flinched, lifting their arms to protect their faces as parts went flying.

"Of course, Sentinel," she said when the fire died down, her eyes now scouring the perimeter to find anything out of place.

"You should take this time to reload your mags," he said and stood. Reaching into his bag he grabbed the box of ten-millimeter rounds and handed it to her. "Do you know how to do it?"

"Uh, yeah, I'm sorry about… reloading," she said, her eyes showing how embarrassed she was.

He rested a hand on her should, "It's okay, Maddy, I don't expect you to know how to do something you may never have done."

That seemed to make her feel better. But then she looked away from him and ejected her magazine to begin adding bullets to it. "So… uh, you called me honey?"

Nate blinked at her and raised a brow. "What?"

"You said… 'Maddy, honey'…" she said softly and Nate frowned.

"I didn't even realize it, I'm sorry, Madelyn, I hope I didn't make you feel uncomfortable." Nate took his hand away from her, suddenly aware of all the little things he'd been doing. He was starting to feel more than responsible for her; he cared about her. Like she was his daughter.

"Uh, no, not uncomfortable, I just…" she looked around and Hancock returned to their sides, but he didn't say anything, noting the awkwardness between the other two. "I've never really had… a fatherly figure, and I guess I'm starting to think this is what that feels like."

"You don't have parents on the Prydwen?" Hancock asked, frowning. He looked sad.

"Um, no…" she looked at the magazine she was pushing bullets into while she spoke. "I… I was born in the Capital Wasteland, and as far as I know I spent the first four years of my life in a slaver's camp. But the, uh, Brotherhood came and…" she couldn't push the last bullet into the mag and it stopped her from finishing her sentence. Hancock gently took it from her and pressed it in, showing that it was hard for him as well. She didn't look at either of them, but just kept her eyes locked on her magazine. "Elder Maxson was just a squire then, like, nine years old, and he… saved me from a dog. All he did was throw a rock at it, and it ran off, but to me, it was the greatest thing."

The Brotherhood had saved her from slavery and she'd spent all her time since them under their banners. It made sense that she was so devoted to them, and to have a close connection to the Elder like that Nate was sure only made her feelings stronger.

"I was given my name by the Brotherhood, before that I was just… 'girl'," she frowned, tears welling in her eyes. "I don't know what would have happened to me if I wouldn't have been saved by them, but I know that I wouldn't be standing here with you, Nate, Hancock…" she sniffed, her nose getting stopped up with emotion.

"Damn it, Maddy," Hancock sniffed and then scooped up the squire in a tight hug. "That's it, I'm keeping you. Brotherhood's gonna have to rip you from my cold, dead hands."

Nate smiled when he saw her laugh, but she was crying, rubbing her eyes with the backs of her hands. He knelt beside the two of them and embraced her as well. "I know I was a bit of a handful, but I don't hate you, Hancock," Madelyn whispered, her voice thick from crying. "Honestly, I really liked you off the bat, but I didn't think I should."

"It's cool, Maddy," the ghoul leaned back and looked at her, his head tilting to the side. "I liked you off the bat too, soon as you pulled that little knife on me," he grinned. Nate smiled at the two of them, happy.

"We should get moving," she said, sniffling and rubbing her face with her sleeve roughly. Nate agreed, giving her hair a quick rustle before helping pack the rest of the stuff so they could get a move on.


	9. Sanctuary

The Red Rocket Station was nowhere near the most interesting thing that Madelyn had ever seen. Little had been done to it, and it didn't look like anyone called it home. That was until the three came around to the garage and a German Shepard leapt up, tackling Nate to the ground.

"Dogmeat!" the Sentinel exclaimed happily rubbing the dog's face roughly as it licked him.

"Wow," Madelyn whispered, she hadn't seen a dog so clean before. Sure there were a few that had most of their hair, but those still had patches of it missing, but this dog looked so… pure.

"Maddy, this is Dogmeat, Dogmeat, say hi to Maddy."

The dog barked and then wondered over to here where he started to lick at her hand until she started petting him. His fur was soft and felt nice between her fingers. "Hi there," she said.

"Blue!" a voice called and Nate spun around just in time to catch a flying woman in a red trench coat. "Where the hell have you been? We expected you back _days_ ago!"

"Sorry, Piper," Nate released the woman and she stepped back and then turned her gaze to Hancock.

"It was you, wasn't it? Stopping at every chems dealer between here and the Castle," she chided and Hancock laughed, waving his hands.

"Oh no, I've been clean most of the trip, actually."

" _Most?_ " Nate raised an eyebrow at the ghoul who smirked and gave a shrug.

Madelyn felt awkward as they spoke. She wondered who this lady was, and remembered a Piper being mentioned. Just briefly, something about Diamond City? And pointing Nate to a 'Nick' that Madelyn was apparently not going to like based on her initial reaction to Hancock. She couldn't think of a reason she wouldn't like Nick unless he was a ghoul too, but she thought she was over that now….

"Mama's got everyone ready," she realized the woman was whispering to Nate now with a sideways glance at Maddy.

"Uh…" she wanted to ask what they were talking about but she didn't feel like it was her place.

"I'm Piper," the woman said, smiling and sticking her hand out.

"Madelyn," came the squire's reply and she shook the woman's hand firmly.

"Got quite the grip there, don'tcha." She was nice enough, but it almost felt like she was hiding something.

"Thanks."

"So you're Blue's squire, right?"

"Um, yeah," she blinked. How could she know that? Madelyn tried to hide her frown and remembered she didn't have a hat on now.

"So we're just stopping here drop off a couple things," Nate said, a hand resting on the girl's shoulder. "Piper, can you take her up to Sanctuary? We'll meet you there in a moment," he promised. Madelyn wasn't sure why, but she had a bad feeling.

"Sure thing, come on, Madelyn," the woman urged her with a hand on her shoulder. Hancock was headed into the Red Rocket out of sight and Nate was going into the garage where she could see a fine Brotherhood of Steel power armor suit.

"No offense, but I have a bad feeling about this," Madelyn confessed as she and the woman approached a bridge that led to an impressive concrete wall that towered high enough to block out anything that was on the inside.

Piper laughed a little, "Oh, no need to worry about anything." She was too chipper. She was defiantly hiding something.

"Sure," Madelyn frowned, her heart hammering in her chest as they came up on the gate. She took a deep breath as it open and was surprised to see that it looked rather… normal for a settlement, but there were no people. Shops and buildings line the streets, but no one was there. "Okay, you're going to kill me aren't you?"

"Oh, stop it," she waved a hand. "Everyone's at the clubhouse," she said and led the way.

Yeah, totally, she was leading her to the slaughterhouse where Madelyn was going to be lined up with the others and fed to a Deathclaw for sport or something. She frowned and followed the woman to a large house built three stories tall and was brightly lit even during the day. She opened the door and Madelyn stepped inside as a chorus of voices shouted, "Happy Birthday!"

"Wha…?" she looked around at the faces she'd never met. All ages smiled at her, making cheering noises, some singing while others asked if they could eat some of the pie now. "What is this?" she looked up at Piper who was grinning widely.

"Oh, happy 18th birthday, kid," an old woman's voice came from behind her. Madelyn turned from Piper to an old woman dressed in blue with a turban around her head. She was smiling at her like she knew her.

"I–uh, how did you know it's my birthday?" Madelyn asked, and then stopped, "Oh, no, I'm only 16…"

"Oh, kid, we're gonna have to talk about that later," she patted Madelyn on the shoulder and smiled happily.

Confusion filled Madelyn as she was guided to a chair and people came up to wish her happy birthday and give her small gifts like treats and ammo, and someone even handed her an inhaler of Jet. She couldn't think of anything to do but thank all the strangers.

Finally Nate and Hancock showed back up. The ghoul leaned in and gave her a hug. It wasn't the first hug he'd give her, but it was the first one she returned. He was so skinny, thin in every part of his being, with the corners of his hat nearly the width of his shoulders. "Here, Maddy," Hancock slipped something into her pocket and whispered, "Don't tell Nate." She would have to look at that later because he stood up and turned so that Nate could come up, not seeming to notice what the ghoul had done. He rubbed her head like he seemed to do as often as he breathed.

"I've had this for a while and never used it, but I thought since you liked that little switchblade of yours that this might be something you would like," Nate pulled a sword out from behind his back. It was long, the length of his forearm and had a weave to the blade.

"Oh my God…" she whispered taking it carefully. "It's amazing," she looked up at Nate who smiled proudly.

"I'm happy you like it, I've taken to just calling it Tooth. Watch the edge, it has poison in the blade…" he rand a finger along the flat of the short sword. There was no way one could call this a knife.

"It's perfect, Nate," she smiled up at the Sentinel. He was the last person in line to her, and when he stepped off to the side

"Time to party!" Hancock yelled, throwing his arms into the air and they whole clubhouse cheered.

Madelyn looked at the things that she'd been given. There was so much stuff, it was piled around the chair she was sitting in like a little wall. She couldn't think of anything to say or do, but tears burned her eyes. Nate noticed while everyone started to dance, loud music came from a source she couldn't point out. "Are you okay?" he asked, having to yell over the volume despite his being so close.

She rubbed her eyes, "Yeah, I–I'm fine! I just…" she shook her head and looked at the blade in her lap. "I've never had a birthday like this!"

"Things on the Prydwen are very different!" Nate agreed, nodding.

"Not just the Prydwen!" she rubbed her eyes and demanded herself stop getting so emotional. "I never really had friends! So… no one threw me parties," she explained and Nate's eyebrows arched in surprise.

"Well, Sanctuary loves to party," he said and offered her a hand to get her out of the chair. "Come on, dance a little, eat something," he said and then smirked, "Have fun, that's an order."

"Yes, sir," she said, saluting her Sentinel with her fist over her heart and her feet together. He saluted her back and she looked around to find something to eat.

It took a long time for people to start to settle down, but that was mostly because alcohol had been added to the mix, which had only livened up the party when it had start to settle. It was well passed sun down when people started to leave either for watch or for bed. The clubhouse remained very full of people.

Madelyn had a lot of fun. Everyone was so nice. Despite what she first thought, no one seemed to be there only for the food and drink, everyone came to meet her, at least just to say hi, and that meant more to her than nearly everything else about the party. Sanctuary seemed to accept all kinds, as no one here looked alike in any way. There was even a pair that looked like raiders in the armor they wore.

Some hours later she found herself relaxing in a chair on the second level where she could look down at the festivities. She'd expelled far too much energy on the dance floor trying to one-up Hancock's drunken spasms. Somehow he became far more coordinated after several bottles of liquor. She'd seen Initiates play drinking games before, normally that ended in them falling over themselves.

To her surprise Nate was drinking rather heavily. Liquor affected him strangely, at first he was just happier, but now he stood in a lone, dark corner watching the party with a single beer between his fingers. He looked… sad. Madelyn frowned and felt the need to go to him, but something wet touched her hand and she jumped away before noticing it was Dogmeat.

"Oh, hey there, boy," she rubbed the space between his ears and he sat down next to her, closing his eyes in pleasure.

"He likes you." Madelyn looked up to see the old woman from earlier.

"You're Mama Murphy, right?" she'd guessed this based off of context clues and several people actually referring to her as 'Mama'.

"Oh yes, kid," she sighed and sat down slowly in the chair next to Madelyn. "And you're Nate's squire, Madelyn Dangerfield."

"Yeah… how–?" the girl started, leaning forward to better position herself, facing the old woman. Dogmeat shimmied forward and rubbed his head against Madelyn's hand until she started petting him again.

"I've _seen_ you, kid. I saw your birth, and the Brotherhood save you from that horrible place…" the woman frowned at her. Madelyn's heart picked up.

"'Seen'?" she asked, her brows coming together.

"It's the chems, kid, they give 'ol Mama Muphy _the Sight_ ," she explained. Madelyn frowned.

"I don't understand."

"I can see some of what was, what will be, and even what is," she sighed, looking tired as she leaned into the chair, frowning.

"And you saw… me?"

"Yeah," Mama Murphy looked over at her, resting her head on the backrest. "You weren't born in that horrible place like you thought you were, kid. You had a happy life," she looked sad, "I saw your parents, they loved you. But those slavers came and they killed them and stole you away."

Madelyn's eyes burned and before she could stop them tears fell over her eyelids. Dogmeat licked at them as the streamed down her cheek. "Why don't I remember?"

"You were told you were born there, kid, and when those Brothers came and saved you, they couldn't know how old you were. You're so small, they just made a guess," she said and reached out to touch Madelyn's hand.

"I…"

"I'm sorry that this has happened to you, kid, but I've seen what comes next, and it'll all be good in the end. You just have so many lies you're tellin', kid, you need to start tellin' the truth." Mama Murphy stood up slowly and started to leave.

"Wait, what did you see?" Madelyn also stood up, taking hold of the woman's soft, fragile hand.

"Oh, kid, you're gonna have to give me some chems if you wanna know more, I told you all I know." The woman turned back to look at her.

Madelyn remembered the thing in her pocket that Hancock had given her. She looked at it to see what it was; it was a Daddy-O. "I have this."

"Oh no, kid, that's for you, I couldn't," she shook her head.

"Oh, the Jet, someone gave me Jet," she said and reached into her back pocket where she'd stuffed it when Nate was looking at her gifts with her, before he got so drunk.

"Ah, that's good," Mama Murphy smiled and Madelyn handed it to her. "Just let me ride the high, the Sight will come…"

"Okay," Madelyn whispered watching as the old woman took the inhaler and sucked in a breath as the Jet tainted the air.

"Oh… kid…" Mama dropped the inhaler and stumbled back into the chair.

"Oh no," Madelyn gasped and knelt in front of her, but the old woman's eyes were wide and far away.

"I see… you, you're so confused. You know what you have to do but you don't think you should. You… you should tell him, but you fear he doesn't want to hear the words, that he would resent you. Oh no, child, he would only love you more…" she gasped, her back arching. "You think it's the end, but it's only the beginning. Your life is going to be a great one, but you have to make a choice. Stay in the Commonwealth, or leave…"

"I… I don't understand," Madelyn frowned. "Who is 'him'?"

"That's all I have, kid." Mama Murphy relaxed in the couch. "It doesn't wanna tell you how to live your life, and you shouldn't focus too hard on it." She nodded to the squire. "You got so many secrets, kid, it's gonna keep hurtin' you… but you're on the right path, Madelyn, just make sure you don't second guess yourself so much."

"Okay," Madelyn whispered, looking into the woman's hazy eyes. She knew all the secrets she was keeping, and it scared her.

"I'm going to rest now, that took more out of me than I thought…" she stood and started to shuffle away.

"I'll help you," Madelyn offered.

"Oh no, Dogmeat is all I need," she said, waving her hand to the girl. "You just enjoy your birthday." The German Shepard stood up and walked beside Mama Murphy, allowing her to grab the bandana around his neck for support.

"I hope we're not interrupting," a voice came from behind her.

Madelyn spun around and paused. It was the sniper, MacCready, holding a very tired looking four year old. "Oh, who's this?" she asked, smiling as she stepped up to the little guy who rubbed his eye with a tiny fist.

"His name's Duncan, can you say 'hi,' pup?" MacCready asked, looking at the boy's face. Duncan looked through his lashes at her and then turned to hide his face in the sniper's neck. "Yeah, playing shy won't work on this one," he smirked, returning his gaze to Madelyn who was looking at Duncan with bright grey eyes.

"He's so precious," she whispered, her hand absently brushing some of his thick auburn hair away from his ear.

"Oh, don't say that, he already thinks he can do whatever he wants," MacCready smiled, twisting so that the boy's face was shown to Madelyn over his shoulder. "Isn't that right, pup?"

"Mmm," he protested and Madelyn smiled.

"There it is," the sniper said, "My present to you, smiles and laughter."

"Oh? Where's the laughter?" she asked, meeting his blue eyes, they were much lighter now, even in the sketchy lighting. He smirked.

"Wanna hold him? I'll show you," he knelt down so that she could take the boy. He lightly protested, but then looked at Madelyn's face and his face lit up. He smiled widely and she could see his eyes were the same color as MacCready's.

"Is he your–?" she raised an eyebrow, the mercenary's quick movements catching her attention.

"Son? Yeah, hard to believe, I know, guy like me with a kid that stinky," he was climbing over the railing of the balcony overlooking the dance floor.

"Hey!" Duncan protested the insult, and MacCready feigned shock, pretending he didn't think the boy could hear him.

"Oop, now I've done it," the sniper said and stood with only one foot on the floor and a hand on the rail.

"What're you doing?" Madelyn took a step forward, suddenly worried that the man would do something to get himself killed.

MacCready lifted a hand to keep her from coming closer, his expression twisting to the same one he'd given her when he showed off his assembly of his sniper rifle. "Ah, just sit back and watch the show," he said and then stepped off the balcony.

"Oh my God!" she leaned over the edge, holding Duncan so that he couldn't see his dad be a complete idiot. But she was surprised to see that he'd landed on his feet perfectly intact. "That was reckless," she called down.

"Nah, it was calculated," he promised her, and then smirked. "This on the other hand…." He weaved through the crowd to where Hancock was dancing in the middle. He asked him something that Madelyn couldn't hear over the music and the ghoul laughed, shaking his head. Then MacCready nodded, his eyes flickering across the room to a man that Madelyn didn't know.

The man was nearly as big as Nate, thick through the shoulders and in the chest and wore workman's clothing, looking to be a mechanic of some sort as he had welding goggles around his neck. His black hair was done up in a pompadour way and he seemed to be heavily flirting with Piper at this moment. MacCready appeared next to him, Madelyn had missed him making the trip there.

The sniper said something to him and both Piper and the man looked confused before the ex-gunner pulled his hand back and fired a swift slap against the mechanic's left ass cheek. Before Madelyn realized what had happened MacCready had bolted from the building and who she now realized was Sturges was right on his coat tails. She broke out laughing and turned around to sit down.

Duncan was nuzzling against her shoulder and she smiled. After getting comfortable in the chair the boy sat up and rubbed his eye. "You sleepy, precious?" she asked, her voice soft.

"Yeah," he whispered and peaked at her through his lashes. "Happy birthday," he said, but his tongue and teeth prevented him from pronouncing it correctly and the result only warmed her heart more.

"Thank you, Duncan," she said. "Your daddy is silly."

"Yeah…. He is weird," the boy agreed and Madelyn thought she was going to cry from how hard she had to try to keep from laughing.

"Yeah, he likes to show off, doesn't he?"

"I dunno," the boy said, looking around, his eyes showing just how tired he was. "He don't do funny things much."

"What do you mean?"

"Not with people, just me and you," he explained and then looked at her with a sleepy grin. "I'm tired, mommy," he said and rested his head back against her shoulder. Her heart skipped. Mommy?

"Oh, Duncan, I'm not your mommy…" she whispered, but the boy shook his head, denying her words.

"We match," he said simply, his words muffled by her shirt, but he reached around her head and played with her ponytail.

Oh God… now she understood. She reminded MacCready of Duncan's mom…. Her heart pounded in her chest and she looked around, trying to figure out what to do. Then she saw MacCready sneaking up the stairs, checking over his shoulder for Sturges she assumed. Madelyn stood up, having to readjust her grip on Duncan before she could walk over to the sniper.

"Oh, hey, guess what," the man smiled proudly at her and then lifted a tin labeled CAPS in crude handwriting, "Got you a birthday gift after all." But when she didn't smile back his expression dropped, "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, I just–" she tried to hand Duncan back over to him. He reached for the boy, but the four year old clung to her.

"No, mommy," he grunted.

Madelyn watched MacCready's face as it twisted from worry to shock, then went stoic, only his brow furrowing. "No, Duncan, this is Maddy, come here, please." He stepped close enough to take his son back gently and Madelyn backed away the moment she was free of the child.

"I'm sorry," she whispered and passed him, having to leave the building. She needed air.

Outside she stood around the side of the building. What was that? What had happened? She'd started to develop feelings for the merc, she realized now to her horror. That was why things between them were so easy, because he saw Duncan's mom when he looked at her. That was just great. She barely knew the guy but the light bickering had had a positive effect, she thought that maybe after some time they might…

Might what? Grow into something? He had a kid…

But that didn't bother her like she thought it should. Duncan, from what she saw, was a pretty good seeming kid. And the time she'd spent with MacCready in Hangman's Ally was by far the best she'd had when compared to the other times the Sentinel wasn't around. Other squiring missions and the little bit of time she'd spent on the Prydwen didn't even come close to this.

"Shhh, pup, please." Madelyn stiffened and held her breath, turning around the corner to see MacCready leaving the clubhouse, holding a crying Duncan. "Crying won't help…" he whispered, his voice sounding thick. Her chest hurt as she watched him walk down the street toward the front gate where a bunkhouse had been built.

Madelyn rested her head against the wall she leaned against. What the hell was happening to her? Tears filled her eyes and then streamed down her cheeks. "Crying won't help," she agreed with the sniper.

* * *

After Madelyn had regained her composure she went back inside and found Nate and Hancock who were trying to talk to each other, but neither made too much sense. "Hey, I'm going to go to sleep," she said, her hand resting on the Sentinel's shoulder.

The man jumped, and then looked back at her, "Maddy–you can't sleep up on a guy like this. It's unsanitary."

"Um, I think you should go to bed, too," she said and then looked at Hancock whose head was bobbing, then jerking back up. "Both of you."

"Oh, all work and no fun makes–squires… little… kids," the Sentinel thought for a moment and then nodded, deciding what he said was exactly what he meant.

"Yeah, okay, come on, I don't know where to sleep."

"Oh, you can just, go anywhere, someone will clean it up," Hancock spun around in the stool and Nate nodded, whole heartily agreeing while he slowly lowered his head onto the bar counter they sat in front of. Jesus, she should have mentioned something to them sooner, she never expected it to get this bad.

The ghoul went down first, hitting the ground like a sack of tatos, and the Sentinel's face was plastered to the bar. "Well then," she frowned at the two of them, surprisingly not as disappointed as she thought she aught to be. She could just go to the bunkhouse, but MacCready was there, and the last thing she wanted to do was look at him. So she had to go somewhere else….

Madelyn went back outside and looked at the sky. It was beautiful here. The city was so far away, and other than the hum of generators and the music inside, it was quiet. She loved being outside, so she went up the street, circled a massive tree, and then went back in the other direction.

She didn't really do much of anything but look at the sky and listen to the sound of Sanctuary. It was perfect here. The settlement was really coming together, all but one house. She stopped in front of it and tilted her head. All the other houses had been cleaned up and converted into new living spaces, but this one looked like a ruined house she'd see out in the Commonwealth abandoned with a blown open door and tipped furniture.

She wondered if they were just waiting to get to this one. So she went inside. Looking around, Madelyn noted the red couch and chair facing a TV, stools sitting by a kitchen island and a table with four broken chairs. She turned down a hall; a laundry room to her right and a bathroom to her left, then two more rooms passed these. She stepped up, looking into the one on the left first. A destroyed bed and two dressers were all that stood out to her here. She stepped into the room and looked around it. There was a floor safe under the bed but it was open and empty, and one of the dressers had been pushed away from the wall to show a precisely cut rectangle, long enough for a medium sized gun to fit inside.

When she turned around her heart stopped. "Oh…" she frowned, sadness taking her.

The room across from this one was a nursery with blue wallpaper and red rocket ships. A crib sat with a red chair close by facing it as if someone sat in it and looked at the crib. Her heart ached. She could feel the pain that was connected with this room. Next to the crib was a table with a Pipboy resting on top of a neatly folded Vault suit. This was Nate's house, and this was his kidnapped son's room.

Madelyn crossed the room, and looked at the items sitting on the table. Next to the Vault suit and Pipboy was a holotape that looked heavily worn from use and a pair of Brotherhood of Steel holotags. A burnt piece of paper in an old frame was sitting up behind them, a laser rifle behind that. She looked closer at the paper, it read what she thought said School of Law….

On the floor between the crib and table was a Mr. Handy. The scorched hole going through its dome along with the fact it only had one of its three eyes remaining told her that it hadn't just shut down, but had basically been killed.

She remembered Nate mentioning that his Mr. Handy had pointed him to Concord. He'd even said the words 'faithful until the end.' How had she missed that? Nate had lost his wife, son, Paladin Danse, and his Mr. Handy. Those were just the ones she knew about. Not to mention the world and life he had had before being frozen for two hundred years.

"What're you doing here?"

Madelyn turned around to see a little boy standing in the doorway. He had to be about ten, but even so she could see Nate's face in his. His blue eyes, pale like the sky, and hair black like cool coals. Her mouth dropped, she thought he was kidnapped? He said that he had killed the guy who took him, but he never said anything about getting him back.

"I asked you a question," the boy frowned, his hands balling up into fists.

"I–I, uh, I'm friends with your dad. Nate is your dad, right?"

He narrowed his eyes at her. "Why are you here?"

"I was just looking, I didn't know whose house this was."

"Leave," he barked and Madelyn nodded, and tried to get through the doorway without getting to close to him. There was something odd about him.

"I'm sorry."

"Get out!" he shouted and then went into the room out of sight. Her heart pounded as she left the house, running right into a hard chest.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," she bounced off and caught herself, looking up into a synth's glowing yellow eyes. "Oh god," she scrambled to grab something to defend herself.

"Whoa there, kiddo, it's okay," it raised its hands at her, talking in a much too normal voice for the state of its face. She looked at its hands, pausing. One was covered in white skin while the other was just metal bones. Her eyes flickered to its face. Parts of the skin were missing, showing the mechanics underneath. "I'm Nick Valentine."

"You–you're Nick?" her eyebrows shot up. Of course, now it makes sense why she'd hate him more than Hancock.

"Yes, so someone's told you about me?" He wore a dirty trench coat and a worn fedora, which for some reason, didn't look too bad on him. Her heart started to slow down.

"I–uh, sorta," she frowned and tried to relax. He was a friend of Nate's, which means he's okay. "Just… in passing, no one said you were a…"

"You can say it, synth," he said, seeming to relax as well.

"I'm sorry, I just…" she looked away from him. Next Nate would tell her about him being besties with a Super Mutant….

"It's okay, I'm not a stranger to this treatment."

She didn't know what to say, and he just stood, waiting. "I'm sorry," she said again and left.

"Did Shaun go in there? I was supposed to be watching him and he just kinda–"

"Nate's son is in there, yeah," she answered, pausing long enough to inform him and then started walking away quicker. She needed to go to sleep. She felt so overwhelmed and exhausted she could feel new tears welling up in her eyes.

She decided to go to the bunkhouse anyway, and tried to find a bed. The place had beds scattered about for anyone and everyone who wasn't a permanent resident. It wasn't hard for her to find MacCready. He was lying in the corner with his back to the wall and his hat hanging from a nail above his bed. She wandered over and noticed Duncan fast asleep in his arms. The sniper's breathing was too quick for him to be asleep, though. She could see his eyes squeezed tight through the darkness, and a wet stream drawing a line from his eye over his nose onto the pillow.

Her own breathing picked up and ascended the stairs as quietly as she could. There were no open beds up stairs, so she left. Madelyn didn't know what to do so she sat down on the ground outside the bunkhouse and looked at the sky. "Crying won't help," she whispered.


	10. Stranger Danger

Something was patting her face. When Madelyn looked she met MacCready blue eyes, then she rubbed her face and Duncan's form came into focus. "I have to go potty," he whispered his cheeks red.

"Oh..." she sat up. She'd fallen asleep on the ground. "Um, where's your daddy?"

"Sleeping, he doesn't feel good."

"Did you tell him you have to go potty?" she asked. He straightened up and she stood.

"No, I thought I could go by my self," he said, his little voice giving her a smile despite everything. "My belt got stuck."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I can help," she whispered and he reached out for her hand and she took it and followed him to the bathhouse where she helped him unbuckle his belt and adjust his pants. "I'll wait outside," she promised, "let me know if you need more help."

Outside she stood with her back to the wall and her arms across her chest, nodding off as she had closed her eyes against the pale morning light. She tried to remember her dream but she couldn't think of anything. The shuffling of feet made Madelyn open her eyes and squint at someone coming her way.

It was Nate who was rubbing his head and running his fingers through his hair. He looked like shit. He didn't say anything to her as he passed to go into the bathroom, he probably didn't even notice her. The bathhouse was built with multiple stalls so she didn't worry about Duncan.

"I need help," a little voice whisper shouted and Madelyn answered the call. When they were leaving she walked him over the water pump people used to rinse their hands after going. "Thank you, Ma-ddy." He seemed to try really hard to pronounce it like that. She frowned just a little wondering if his father had coached him.

"You're welcome, sweetie," she knelt onto the sidewalk to put herself at his level. "Did you wanna go back to sleep?"

"No," he shook his head quickly, grinning.

"Then what did you wanna do?"

"Breakfast!" he said throwing his arms up. He was far more awake now and she felt ages behind him.

"Okay, I think I can do that," she looked around. Most of the settlement would be nursing hangovers so she didn't imagine she'd get much help from them.

Upon finding a cooking station she tried to throw together some things that were stored near by but she didn't have the foggiest idea what to do with the meats that she couldn't even name. "This is Brahmin right?" She looked at Duncan who was sitting on a chair swinging his feet happily, but he shrugged.

"That's deathclaw, actually." The voice came from the bunkhouse where a woman was putting her hair up as she crossed the street. It was red like blood and shaved on the sides despite the length of the ponytail. Madelyn had seen a few women on the Prydwen wear that hair, but this woman wasn't military, she was one of the pair that looked like raiders. "I should know, I killed it," she added as she came up to the cooking station. She wasn't wearing her armor now, but she had on her road leathers.

"You killed this deathclaw?"

"Probably, I sold a bunch of meat to the settlement when I got here, so more than likely that's on of mine." She bent and flipped the cooler open to check it out. "Yeah, that's mine, fresh. Only a day old." She straightened up. Her face was spattered with blood and dirt, which masked most of her features under the texture. Madelyn couldn't really get a read on her.

"Um, so how do I cook it?" Madelyn looked down at it.

"Oh, not a breakfast thing, noooooo," the woman took the slab of meat from Madelyn's hands and dumped it back into the cooler. "No, no no, you'll be hurting after that puppy, fills you up way passed full and that's _not_ what you wanna do at breakfast."

"Oh, thanks," she looked at the other coolers.

"Mmm, radroach is pretty good for breakfast, or, oh, mongrel," the woman picked through the meats, picking them up to show them to Madelyn who couldn't tell the difference.

"Um, whatever you suggest." The woman looked at her and smiled, the action squinting her eyes because of her full cheeks.

"I like you, what's your name, kid?"

"Madelyn," she answered.

"Oh, you're the birthday girl, sorry I didn't get you anything, we weren't really… invited? We just happened to be here. I'm Rowan," she dropped a cut of meet and offered a hand to Madelyn. She tried to smile and nodded, reaching out to shake the woman's hand.

"Nice to meet you," Madelyn said politely and the woman smirked.

"Not met many wastelanders have you?"

"Well, I don't…" Madelyn didn't know how to answer that.

"We're a bit different than settlers, I don't really have a 'home'– makes me weird to some people," she explained and then picked up a large, round, thick hunk of meat. "Bloatfly for the win."

"Why don't you live here in Sanctuary?" Madelyn asked as she got out of the way so the woman could cook the meat.

"Oh, Chad wouldn't have that, he doesn't really… like people," she explained and Madelyn noticed that her smirk seemed forced now.

"Who's Chad?"

"My mate," she said simply and this time she frowned, but it disappeared behind a stoic look quickly.

Duncan tugged on Madelyn's shirt and she looked at him, "Can I play and come back? This is boring…"

Madelyn laughed a little and nodded, "Please don't go far, I want to be able to see you."

"Promise," he said and slid off the chair to run off to a playground that had been built up around an old, prewar one.

"He yours? He's absolutely adorable," Rowan said, stirring the meat over the flame.

"Oh, no, he's a… uh, friend's kid…" she didn't know what to say and stopped the explanation there.

"Sorry, he just looks a lot like you," the wastelander said and looked at the meat. "I want kids, but…"

"But what?" Madelyn raised an eyebrow at the woman. She had to be a few years older than her. Well, maybe not as many as she thought, learning that she was two years older than she was still hadn't sunken in. She was eighteen? She felt like she had lost two years of her life. Like they were ripped away, not just that she'd forgotten them.

"Chad doesn't want them. I…" she flinched at a memory and then shook her head. "Sorry, I shouldn't be talking about that, here."

"Why not?" Madelyn's confusion was apparent and Rowan just shook her head, her green eyes meeting Madelyn's just long enough for her to see the sadness deep inside the woman.

"Ro, where the hell are you?"

Both women looked at the man in the bunkhouse doorway. He was large, barrel chested and fit, but nothing compared to Nate. And until MacCready stepped up behind him, he looked tall, but the sniper had several inches on him.

"Here, Chad," Rowan waved, smiling, but it didn't crease her eyes.

"We need to get out of here," the man said, coming up to the cooking station. MacCready hung back, leaning against the wall of the bunkhouse.

"Can't I just finish breakfast first? This kid doesn't know how to cook to save her life," the woman smiled, trying to lighten the suddenly heavy mood.

Chad turned his glaring eyes to Madelyn and then back to Rowan, "And I care why? Because you're suddenly responsible for her?"

Madelyn frowned, getting a bad feeling about this guy. "She was just being nice."

Chad turned to face her now, and Madelyn had never felt so small. "I wasn't aware I was talking to you," he growled. Courage swelled in her chest and she stood from the chair. His eyebrows rose and she could see that passed all the dirt and scars on his face, his right eye was bruised, swollen a bit more than his left. "Oh, think you're gonna do somethin', cunt?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm gonna have to stop you right there, Chad," MacCready was suddenly standing beside Madelyn, his hands ready to either separate them or grab a weapon. Madelyn didn't take her eyes off of the man.

"Come on, Chad, we'll leave," Rowan stood, reaching for his arm.

The man swatted her away, the back of his hand slapping her face. She turned and held her cheek but he didn't even seem to notice he'd done it. "No, I wanna hear what you got to say."

"Back up, Chad," MacCready growled, stepping in front of Madelyn now who was still –stupidly– standing her ground.

"You first, MacCready." Chad probably would have been an attractive guy if he had learned how to use a razor correctly and cleaned up his face. But that would only help so much as fighting, Madelyn could tell, was very important to him. Scars of all ages littered the skin she could see, and not just on his face. He wore a harness across his chest showing off almost everything above the waist. The man's hair was almost shaved, but not cleanly, and his jaw was no better.

MacCready took a step back, pressing against Madelyn to show Chad he wasn't looking for a fight, but her eyes looked at Rowan who rubbed her cheek and showed a gnarly scar over her right cheek going up her nose. Was that from him too? How often did he hurt her?

Madelyn didn't know Rowan, but she was a good person, she could tell that, and this guy, Chad, was horrible. Madelyn stepped around MacCready, pulled out her switchblade, ejected the blade, and thrust if forward all in a fluid motion she'd practiced too many times. But she'd never practiced it on a living target.

Chad's hands moved quick and he knocked the blade sideways and out of her hand with the wrist of his right hand and then grabbed hers with his left. He pulled her forward and to the side, tripping her over her own legs. But Madelyn growled and used her other hand to grab the front of his harness and lift her legs up so that the fall turned into a swing. Chad hadn't expected her to land on her feet, but before Madelyn could do anything MacCready had thrown himself at the man, knocking him to the ground, his fists landing blow after blow, practiced on the other man's face.

The wastelander tried to grab at MacCready, but his leg shot out, pinning his rival's hand to the pavement with his boot while the other was stuck under his knee. Madelyn watched her eyes captivated by the side of Chad's head taking the hits as the sniper rained them down like an unholy hail. Blood sprayed and the sound of bone and cartilage cracked, but Madelyn didn't feel sick like she expected. This wasn't like when she'd seen fights in the Brotherhood and the sounds had always made her want to throw up.

Rowan pushed Madelyn aside and grabbed MacCready by the dusters and threw him off of Chad. "Get off him," she yelled, her voice had an animalistic sound to it.

"Rowan, you don't have to live this way," the sniper rolled over, meeting her eyes. But she ignored him and went to Chad, bending beside him to examine his broken face. When she reached out, he swatted her hands roughly and tried to get on his feet. Again she tried to help him, but he pushed her away with enough force for her to nearly land on her ass, but she caught herself. Madelyn looked at the woman so confused as to why she would protect him.

"Rowan," she whispered, and the wastelander looked at her, her green eyes filled with tears. "Stay…."

"Come on," Chad grunted and started for the gate. They were just going to leave all their belongings? Did they even have weapons? Madelyn frowned and looked around for her switchblade.

She ran after Rowan and took the woman's hand. "Hey, I have to–"

"Take it, and please… please, use it on him," Madelyn pressed the switchblade into the woman's hand. The woman looked at it then at her, her eyes sad.

"Thank you, but I can't," she said. Madelyn saw her tuck the knife into her pocket and then run to Chad's side.

"Daddy, what happened?"

"Nothing, pup, it's okay," MacCready was taking the meat off the fire. Madelyn wandered back over, but her eyes followed the wastelanders until the gate closed and she couldn't see them anymore.

"Did you know them?" Madelyn asked, still looking at the gate.

MacCready took a moment to answer. "Yeah, I've known Rowan since I came to the Commonwealth, she has been with him longer than that…" he was frowning, she could tell by his tone.

"Why haven't you killed him yet?"

"Same reason that I didn't just now, she always stopped me."

"Why?"

Madelyn looked at the sniper now who shook his head. "She thinks she loves him. He makes her believe no one else can love her. I don't think she had a real family, either, he's… all she has ever really had, I think." MacCready cut up the food into three equal parts and placed them on plates for the three of them. "We should sit inside, there are tables," he explained and led the way.

Madelyn sat across from Duncan with MacCready to her side. She just looked at her food for a moment before eating it, while both boys started right away. Duncan consumed his before she'd even had three bites and was asking to play in the park again.

"Go on, pup," MacCready said, taking his son's plate and putting it under his out of the way. The boy ran off, stumbling, but catching himself with impressive agility.

"Why do you call him pup?" Madelyn decided to ask, changing the subject away from Rowan and Chad.

The sniper smiled. "I've been called a fox for more than one reason, and Lucy, his mother, always liked the nickname, so it just kind of… happened," he shrugged and looked at her, his blue eyes bright in the morning light.

"Lucy was your… wife?"

"Yeah," he nodded, looking down at his food now, his smile fading. Madelyn felt bad for asking. "I, uh, lost her to a pack of ferals when we held up in a subway station…. I just… took Duncan and ran, there was nothing I could do, they'd already torn her apart before I could fire a shot," he swallowed hard against a lump in his throat and then stood up, leaving the table to go into a kitchen nook and dig through a couple coolers before reappearing with a couple of Nuka Colas. "Not long after Duncan got really sick, I came here hoping to find something to help him, and shi– crap happened, and I took much longer than I thought I was going to. But Nate helped me, then he learned what I was doing, and we got him the cure, and I brought him here, so I could be with him whenever I wasn't out on missions."

He handed her a drink and she took it, popping the cap and pocketing it. He popped his off and slid it to her. "No, it's okay," she said, and pushed it back toward him, her fingers pressing up against his as he refused to move his hand. The cap slid upward and the distance between their fingers diminished completely.

"You didn't take the caps I got for you last night," his voice was soft, and his eyes were on their touching knuckles.

"Two hundred caps is far more than I need," she whispered, unable to look away from his face. He had a pointed face, his straight nose splitting it down to his pointed lips. The scruff around his mouth was getting out of hand, he grew it pretty quick, and he would need to shave soon unless he wanted to look like Elder Maxson. He tilted his head down and the bill of his hat hid his face. She slowly drew her hand away from his.

"I forgot they hand you everything on that airship, don't they?" He sounded like he was trying to put more negativity in the question than he did.

"No, actually," she said, giving an awkward smile he couldn't see. "They make us pay for all of our gear and supplies."

He tilted his head, "That sounds kind of counter productive."

"What do you mean?" She looked at her plate and realized she hadn't been eating, so she tried to start.

"They pay you, right? And then they get their money back by charging you for things you need…" he raised an eyebrow at her.

She'd never thought of it like that. She swallowed her bite and said, "Well, we get our money back if we turn in our uniforms in good condition, so it's more like… borrowing?" She shrugged and then took a sip of her Nuka Cola. Madelyn could feel his eyes on her.

"Why did you join?"

She cleared her throat and bit her lip in thought, should she tell him the truth? She wasn't sure if she was ready for him to know. But he had told her of his past, so she felt like she should give him something. "I joined because they saved me, back in the Capital Wasteland, when I was about Duncan's age."

"You grew up in the Capital Wasteland?" he asked, his eyebrows lifting.

"Yeah, I came here with the Prydwen, a little over a year ago," she said and gave a shrug before taking another bite.

"I… I guess I thought you had joined them when they got here, like a lot of people seemed to." He straightened up. "I came from Little Lamplight, I was…" he smiled and his cheeks reddened a bit, "the mayor for a bit."

"You? A mayor?" she raised an eyebrow at him. She'd heard of Little Lamplight, but had never talked to anyone from there. "What's that make you now, a mango?"

"Mungo," he corrected, and smiled. "And you are too, young lady." He leaned back against the table, supporting himself with his arms.

That reminded her. "How old do I look?"

MacCready's smile faded and he looked worried, "Is that a trick question?"

"No, I really want to know, how old do I look to you?" she asked.

He looked over her face and she suddenly felt shy and couldn't look at him. So she distracted herself with her last bite of food. "Well, I'm no expert, but I would say about…" he swayed back and forth. "Sh– ugh, I don't know nineteen?"

Absently she wondered why it seemed he never allowed himself to curse, but she was more worried about him thinking she was a year older that she just learned she was. "Why do you think that?"

"I was wrong, wasn't I?" he frowned and sat up, looking uncomfortable.

"I mean, I'm apparently eighteen, so not really."

"'Apparently'?" he raised an eyebrow at her.

"Yeah, I… I thought I was turning sixteen yesterday, but Mama Murphy told me she saw my birth… and I wasn't born where I thought I was, and that I'd basically forgotten the first two years of my life." She didn't look at him while she explained.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Maddy…" he said, his hand sliding across the table to hold hers. She hadn't realized she was picking intensely at the skin on the sides of her thumb opening small wounds.

"My… uh, name is Madelyn," she said, glancing over at him, "Squire Madelyn Dangerfield."

He smiled, but it wasn't an amused smile like she thought he would give, not like when Hancock had laughed at her name. "Robert Joseph MacCready," he replied, and squeezed her hands. She looked down at his hand on hers. His fingers were long and callused.

"So that's what R.J. stands for," she smiled, and he raised an eyebrow.

"I heard Nate refer to you as that," she said and he nodded.

"Yeah, he's one of the few, everyone else just calls me MacCready," he shrugged, his hand pulling away from hers. She resisted the urge to grab hold of it and keep it from leaving her. "I'm sorry if me calling you Maddy made you uncomfortable, I'll stop, and I'll teach Duncan to say Madelyn."

"Oh, no, it's fine," she said, looking at him now. "I don't want to confuse him, Maddy is okay. No one but Nate and Hancock call me it anyway, it's kind of refreshing, on the Prydwen I'm just 'Dangerfield' or 'Squire' or a combination there of."

"Well, I'll have to think of something creative then," he smiled and took a gulp of his Nuka Cola. She did also and then looked at her hands where she'd began picking again. "It's something about your eyes," he said, and when she raised and eyebrow at him he continued, "Why I thought you were nineteen. You just, seem like you've seen so much."

"I have," she whispered, looking at a couple settlers who came into the breakfast area. She suddenly felt self-conscious about talking about herself.

"Hey, I wanna show you somewhere," he said, seeming to notice her discomfort.

"Okay," she stood grabbing both of their Nuka Colas and followed him after he put their plates in a bin in the kitchen. They stopped by the park where he grabbed up Duncan and threw him over his shoulder where the boy thrashed and kicked playfully trying to wrestle his way out of his dad's adept grip.

MacCready led the way across Sanctuary to a gate she hadn't noticed between two houses. When it opened she was able to see a small footbridge that crossed a cute creek. They crossed the bridge and then followed the creek to the east some ways. As they walked, no one spoke, not even Duncan who had already worn himself out and was lying limp on the sniper's shoulder.

Madelyn realized then that she wasn't armed, not since she'd given her switchblade to Rowan, and MacCready didn't seem to have anything on him either unless he had a knife or small firearm tucked away in one of his pouches. She started to walk a little closer, and that was went she noticed the blooms of bloodleaf in the creek. They were huge and numerous, and as they walked there were only more and more. She let out a long breath and then looked at MacCready who was smiling down at her.

"It's just up there," he gestured up a steep incline to a manmade structure she could just barely divide from the trees, had he not pointed it out she wouldn't have noticed it.

Duncan was put down on his feet when they got halfway up the hill and he scrambled over himself to get up to the building. Once they reached him, both MacCready and Madelyn turned around to gaze at the landscape the little structure had a perfect few of.

"Wow, this is just… beautiful," she breathed, and peered over at MacCready who was looking at her now.

"Yeah, I found this place a while back, no one's been here to claim in, I think having Sanctuary so close scared who ever lived here off." He turned around and started walking up the steps to the building. Madelyn looked back at the sight, Sanctuary was close, just down the hill, across the creek, and up the other hill; its walls were clear in contrast with the trees around them.

"Daddy, I wanna fish!" Duncan ran up the stairs.

"Later, pup, daddy's gonna talk to Maddy for a little while, you wanna look at a couple comics?"

"Yeah!" he shouted. While they spoke Madelyn had made her way up to join them. MacCready pulled out a couple of comic books and offered them to the boy who took them and ran down the stairs and then crawled under the building's stilts for shade from the warming mid-morning sun.

"You have comics?" Madelyn grinned and he shrugged.

"I love reading them, Nate collected them for a little while, and then gave them to me for Duncan, but I…" he smirked, "I think I enjoy them just a little more, since I can actually read the words."

Madelyn smiled and looked around the room. There was a half wall, and a full wall across from each other. Between them was an open side where you entered from the stairs, and the other side was pushed up against a rock side. A shelf held food and drink that could sustain a single person for a couple days, and there was a sleeping bag on the ground by the half wall. Other than a single chair and a footlocker where MacCready kept his comics, there really wasn't much else here. "How'd you find this place?"

"I was on watch, looking through my scope and I saw it from my perch. I waited until I was off to come over here and since then I've just kinda kept it as mine and Duncan's place. We're close enough to Sanctuary that if something happens we can either get back or get help fairly easily, beside, I keep a flare gun here," he lifted the sleeping bag's foot to show her and she nodded.

"I didn't bring a weapon," she whispered, feeling guilty.

"It's okay, I'll protect you," he smiled, standing up and gestured for her to sit in the chair. She sat down and looked at the Nuka Colas in her hands.

"I uh, don't remember which one is whose," she said, her cheeks flushing. He smirked and knelt beside her, his blue eyes examining the identical glasses.

"Moment of truth," he said, smiling wider now, "Do germs bother you?"

She flushed more red and didn't miss how his eyes seemed to drink in the sight. "I feel like that's a trick question."

"Oh? Why's that?"

"No matter my answer you can give me crap for it," she whispered, looking down at the glasses. To be honest she didn't mind if she drank after him. Her mind was already spinning, though, and she wondered what it would do if she learned she _had_ drank after him.

"You think I would make fun of you?"

"Well, we did have that whole… Hangman's Ally scene." She avoided looking at him, and oh was it so hard.

"Oh yeah, when you told me to wipe that butt-hole off my face, right?"

"And you shot me," she said, gesturing to her arm, now looking at him.

"Well played," he stood and took the Cola in her left hand. When he did so she remembered he'd sat to her right and she'd grabbed his first with her right hand. She had his now, and he had hers. A warm feeling swelled in her stomach as she watched him turn and press the soda to his lips to take a drink.

"Why don't you curse?" she asked, remembering that she hadn't actually used the word 'butt'.

"I promised Duncan I would clean up my act, some time ago, and I've done pretty good I think, I'm an official Minuteman, and for the most part I don't swear… too bad."

She smiled and nodded, "That's a pretty good reason." Madelyn lifted the glass to her lips and took a long, slow drink.

"What did the Brotherhood save you from?" MacCready asked, suddenly.

Taking a moment to get her thoughts together, she decided she should tell him the truth, especially based off the advice that Mama Murphy had given last night. "I was… I thought I was born in a slaver's camp, in the Capitol Wasteland. Not Paradise Falls, but I spent some time there when I was moved between camps." She figured he knew the landscape about as well as she did. "I was in a small camp near the Citadel when the Brotherhood decided to end the camp and free the slaves."

"Free them?" MacCready seemed surprised.

"Yeah, they came and liberated us, I was… I guess six, but I didn't know how old I was, I'd no reason to know how much time had passed. Elder Maxson was just a squire then, and he saved me from a hunter's hound…." She was lost in the memory now. "All he did was throw a rock at it, but it was the kindest thing that had ever been done for me…. I knew he would have done it for anyone, but he ran up to me to see if I was okay, and I…" she swallowed, looking at him then. "He named me, him and Elder Lyons. They, uh, took me in, and I became a squire, and I've been so since."

MacCready nodded his understanding. "I'm sorry for what happened to you, Madelyn."

"They thought I was four, I guess it's because of how small I am," she said, looking down at herself. Her clothes were much too big, and now she realized how funny she might look. Now she was embarrassed to sit in front of the sniper dressed as she was. Her arms folded over her chest and she crossed her legs.

The ex-mercenary knelt in front of her. "Hey, the Brotherhood isn't exactly praised for its smarts is it? Just for those big suits of steel." He smiled at her, and she smiled a little back. Scribes were generally the 'smart' ones, but what he said was true in the eyes of civilians at the least. "There it is, that little mouse smile of yours," he reached up and traced a smile along her lips where the corners curved up. "There it is, your nickname, mouse."

"Really?" she asked, raising her eyebrows at him.

"Yup, doesn't matter if you like it, it's official," he stood and his hand left her, her skin felt cold where he'd touched her.

"Well, sorry to disappoint you, but I actually like it."

"Damn, I guess I'll have to change it," he sighed and leaned against the wall of the building.

"Daddy, I wanna go back to the park," Duncan came up the stairs and handed his father the comic books.

"Okay, I'll walk you back, pup." He looked back at Madelyn. "Do you want to stay here?"

"Will you come back?" she asked, trying not to sound too hopeful.

"If you want me to," he replied with a smile the brightened his eyes.

"Then I'll wait here oh so patiently," she said with as much extra drama as she could.

"I'll be right back," he promised and she watched him as he strode back off to Sanctuary. When he was out of sight Madelyn looked at the comic books that Duncan had given back. She didn't get that far when she hear footfalls coming back up the stairs.

"Back already?" Madelyn asked, looking up to meet the goggle of a sacked hood. Her smile dropped and she let go of the comic, which fell between her legs to the ground. As the raider grabbed for the gun on his hip, Madelyn stood, moving as quickly as she could. She didn't have a weapon and she was going to have to make sure she got his, or kept him from having it.

Instead of grabbing the gun she just tackled the raider, using the force of her movement and his uneven stance on the steps to throw him to the ground where they both rolled down the steep hill, separating and hitting rocks and trees until they came to a stop. Madelyn ended up in the creek and the raider got caught on a tree. She coughed, trying to catch the breath that had been forced out of her. "I really need to do some'more hand-to-hand training," she whispered to herself and rolled over onto her hands and knees.

"Set'ler bitch," the raider growled and kicked her in the stomach as he had recovered quicker than her from their fall. Madelyn landed back in the water, deeper here than it had been up stream.

"I'm Brotherhood, fuck-face," she growled and lashed a leg out, getting him in the shin enough to get it out from under him. He fell into the water, the slick stones keeping either of them from being able to keep decent footing.

Madelyn tried to get up, but her boot slipped and she landed back on her hands and knees. When she looked over the raider was almost back on his feet, but the leg she'd kicked wasn't supporting much weight. She must have really hurt it. Good. The squire grabbed a rock from the creek bed and stood up, throwing her weight up, and then taking a single step back to catch herself. She used her arms to stead her balance, and then she was face to face with the raider.

"Leave now, or I will be forced to kill you," she ordered. The man laughed and reached up, pulling off his soaked hood.

"Set'ler, Brothahood, makes nah difference, ya die, now," he reached into his pocket and pulled out a pair of brass knuckles. "Real slow like."

"Let's dance," she widened her stance, lowering herself so she could get better stability on the slippery stones.

The raider attacked first, just like she expected him to. Moving to the side she let him force all his weight forward and she took only a slight impact to her left arm. With that motion she grabbed him by the collar of his leather chest piece and directed him around, countering the weight with her own. This put him in a slight bend and then his face collided with the ledge over the creek. When he hit, she lifted the rock and brought it down, the back of his head being his target.

But he rolled away, his weight greater than hers, which forced her forward, on top of him. He grunted and grabbed her by her ponytail and pulled her head down toward the water at his side. She lashed out, reaching with her fingers and kicking with her legs. Her fingers found his face, and she grabbed for his eyes but she felt his teeth snap, catching the flesh at the base of her thumb enough to make her jerk away. Her face was now submerged and she was breathing much too quickly to conserve anything, or push air out of her nose to keep from drowning.

What a stupid girl, why hadn't she gotten them away from the water? Now it was going to kill her.

Madelyn reached for his face again but his other hand grabbed hers and wrenched it up behind her back. She heard a pop and pain engulfed her shoulder. Damn it, he'd pulled it out of socket. She used her other hand to reach for anything she could. The rocks were too small, and they were on the other side of his body, his legs, she couldn't even position herself to get him in the balls.

She was almost out of air now, she could feel her lungs burning and water filling up her mouth and trying to get up her nose.

The Daddy-O. She had it in her pocket, she could reach it and use the needle as a knife, it was thick enough she could stab him a few times before it broke, maybe that was enough.

She reached for the syringe and grabbed it as the water started to take her. Madelyn jammed the drug into the man's thigh, and then pulled it out and repeated.

The pain shocked him and he arched his back, throwing her off of him as he tried to see what had hurt him. She coughed, landing on her back in the water, her head hitting a rock, but not hard enough for her to lose consciousness. The raider stood up and came for her. She held the drug like it was a knife and when he was in range she lashed out, trying to kick his leg, but she hadn't recovered, and he was not as damaged as her.

He knocked her feet out of the way and then grabbed her wrist, his fingers pressing into the space between her ulna and radius so that she dropped the Daddy-O. Her other arm was limp and useless. He held it above her head and then used his other hand on her throat. "What'a shame, ya got a purty face, ma'be I'll fuck it when ya die. Leave ya for ya Brothas to find."

Big mistake. She used all her strength in her legs to push him forward where she shot upward enough to hurt her own arm, but also to head-butt the raider. He fell backward. Her head hurt so bad, but she knew he'd broken his nose against her frontal bone.

She stood up, ignoring all the pain in her body best she could and grabbed a rock from the water and threw it at him, hitting him in the chest. She heard the air leave him in a whoosh, and then she grabbed another, bigger rock. She stood over him. "What a shame, you have such an ugly face, no one but me got to see what happens when a sister and a brother love each other very much."

His eyes widened, and she brought the rock down on his face, hard, shattering it, but she heard him make a noise, and wondered if he could still hear her. "Maybe I'll leave you for your uncle dad and aunt mom to find," she whispered, leaning in close to his ear, before lifting the rock up and bringing it down again, effectively killing the raider.

His body twitched for a moment, and then went still. And that was when she realized just how much pain she was in.

"Madelyn?"

She looked up and saw MacCready standing on the bank, looking at her with wide, blue eyes filled with shock. How much had he seen? "Hi," she whispered and then looked at her hands wondering whose blood dripped into the slow creek.


	11. Feels and Flashbacks

**Thank you so much, Paladin Bailey, for your review. I'm sorry that Nate and Hancock's relationship isn't Brotherhood approved, but I felt it was right for his character, and it was a wake up call that Madelyn needed. It means the world to me that you left such a kind review, and it's really inspired me to better this work even more. I have been rereading and adjusting inconsistencies if I find them, and I hope that those reading bare with me as this is my first time publishing a FanFiction where people other than close friends can see it. Thank you again! The favorites and follows mean the world to me and are what will keep me writing! And I am thankful for the comments given, even if you don't enjoy every aspect of the story, I'm happy that you continue to read.**

 **Ad Victoriam!**

* * *

Nate opened his eyes. He was staring at a wall, a metal wall. It could have been anywhere in Sanctuary, but he knew that this particular wall was the one in his bedroom. He slowly lifted himself up, trying his best not to let his head spin.

"Hey there, sexy," Hancock hung his head upside down off the bed to look at him.

"God, what time is it?"

"Hmm, I think it's half passed I need a kiss," the ghoul smirked and Nate almost rolled his eyes.

"Get over here and help me up," he grunted, reaching up for a beam above his head to try to get his ass off the ground.

"Getting too old to drink like that," Hancock stated as he rolled off the bed. The General nodded his agreement, but he wasn't sure if John was referring to both of them or just Nate.

"I don't think I'm going to even look at alcohol at least for a month after that," the general wrapped his arm around the ghoul who straightened him up. "But, no, really, what time is it?"

Hancock nodded his head from side to side thinking. Hangovers had almost no effect on him, but that was probably because he was just constantly high and/or drunk. Once Nate had tried to get him to stop but the ghoul expressed his concern that the cumulative hangover may just kill him. "I'd say just passed noon," he settled his black eyes on Nate as he rested a hand on his chest. Last night Nate had changed into some more comfortable clothing, a flannel and jeans. It was nice to wear something that wasn't armored for a little while.

"Should find Maddy, she's probably pissed that we left her alone," he frowned, disappointed with himself.

"I saw her and the MacCready boys leave the settlement, out the north gate," Hancock shifted his weight.

"Where would they be going?"

"I'm not sure, but MacCready goes out there with Duncan a lot, I just assumed they went fishing or something." The ghoul's fingers slipped between the buttons of Nate's flannel. "Think we can screw around a little?"

"Not right now," he sighed and kissed the ghoul's wrinkled forehead. "Tonight, and then tomorrow we'll head out again, I want to find out what happened to those settlers at Hangman's Ally."

The ghoul frowned a little but nodded. "It's like out honeymoon's ended or something, we just fuck less and less nowadays."

Nate smirked. "I don't love you any less."

"Yeah, yeah, I love you too, come on, we need to go get our little girl," he grabbed his hat and put it on. Hancock almost never changed out of his Mayoral duds, and today was no exception.

Nate's little house was a metal shack of sorts, with a kitchen, living room, bedroom, a balcony off the bedroom, and a staircase off the back door leading into the backyard. The front door was facing the large tree in the cul-de-sac. They had cleared away the two ruined houses but the foundations were strong, so Nate took the one that had the better view over the walls of Sanctuary, but that was back when the walls were just wooden slabs put up by him and Sturges, now he could barely see over the concrete structures. They'd done so much in a year….

His bedroom was just wide enough for two beds pushed together and a nightstand between them and the wall on the left side. The right side had the doorway leading into the living room. He'd spent a lot of time on the balcony, building it out with wood and set up a sitting area. He even had an area where Hancock and he could have breakfast outside under a canopy. The living room wasn't large, it was probably smaller than the one he'd had in his other house, but it did its job, with two modern, blue couches, and a single chair lined up so they faced a table with a radio on it. The kitchen was just to the right of the front door upon entry, but it was blocked from the living room by the walls of the bedroom. He didn't like the kitchen out of sight like that, but the house had sort of been just thrown up, so he didn't complain too much. Besides, he didn't really spend too much of his time here.

On their way out Nate grabbed the box of Sugar Bombs they had almost finished. Popping them into his mouth like popcorn, he thought about the events of last night. He had left Madelyn on her birthday with a bunch of strangers. What an idiot. She didn't know anyone here and he expected her to just have fun? And where the hell had she slept? He should have offered his bed to her and had him and Hancock sleep on their couches so she didn't have to sleep in the bunkhouse.

Hancock grabbed a handful of cereal and shoved the mass of it into his mouth without spilling any bombs. When he grinned at Nate he showed the puffs between his teeth and tucked into his teeth and the General felt a little better. Madelyn was a strong kid, she could handle herself. He just wished he could remember more of last night.

Nate and Hancock left the shack as they ate. They got waves and small talk from the settlers as they headed toward the north gate. Much of Sanctuary seemed to be asleep or hung over. "You think they're still out there?"

"Probably," Hancock shrugged.

The guard pushed the gate open for them, and then pulled it back when they were through it. "Now what?"

"I don't know, Natie, can't you do some, like, tracking or somethin'?" the ghoul waved at the ground helplessly, but they heard a yell from down stream. "That sounded like–"

"Maddy!" Nate was off at a full speed.

"Shit…" Hancock followed trying to keep up with the bigger man.

The Sentinel was able to jump from either side of the stream back and forth as each side held obstacles that would slow him down. Then he came to a body with a head smashed in by a rock. His pale blue eyes widened in horror as he knelt down next to it to check the body. It was a man, a raider by his wares.

Hancock stepped up and wrinkled the bridge of his nose. "Damn, who do you think did that?"

"I don't know," Nate looked around and then saw a building up the slope from them. There was a familiar duster bent over a task with its back toward Nate. He climbed up the hill as quickly as he could manage and stopped at the bottom of the stairs when he saw MacCready kneeling in front of Madelyn whose face was twisted in pain. The squire's shirt had been taken halfway off and it left her in a little green tank top that hung on her loosely.

"I should have been here to protect you," R.J. was saying, looking at her arm and moving it around slowly.

"You couldn't have known he would show up," Madelyn protested his words and then opened her eyes. They flickered over to Nate and she looked concerned. "I was hoping you wouldn't see me till I had an explanation," she frowned.

Nate entered the little shack and MacCready moved out of the way so that he could take his place looking at her wounds. "Are you okay? What happened? I saw that raider…"

"Well, that asshole thought I'd be an easy target or something, I don't know if he knew I was here or if he waited for MacCready to leave, but he," she waved a hand as if trying to look like she wasn't bothered by it, "Came in here and I just… reacted. We tumbled down the hill and…." But now her eyes were getting wet. She was finally taking in what had happened. "I, uh, killed him, he almost had me a couple times, so that made it easier. I told him to leave, or I'd do it." She sniffed, her nose thick with mucus. "He said I had a pretty face and he was going to fuck it after he killed me for my Brothers to find," and at that point the tears spilled over her eyes. They streamed down her face, making trails in the light dusting of dirt that everyone in the wasteland had on their face.

"Oh, Maddy," Nate wrapped his arms around her. "You did a great job, sweetheart," he whispered into her hair as she squeezed him tightly, her face in his shoulder. "He couldn't have won. He never stood a chance against you." He stroked her hair and tried to slow his own breathing. He wished that he could have been the one to kill the raider, but he knew that it had to be her she couldn't always be saved; especially as a Brotherhood soldier.

Hancock's hand rested on Nate's shoulder and he looked up to see he was brushing her hair out of her face. "Damn, Maddy, when I was your age I couldn't even throw a punch without breaking a finger, or my whole hand." He smiled at her, showing how proud he was. "You defended yourself without any weapon but your surroundings, do you understand how outrageously badass that is? I don't think I could have done it," he pointed a thumb to Nate. "You get it from him."

She let out a huff and raised an eyebrow at him. "Hancock, you know you guys aren't my real parents, right?" she asked, using her sleeve to wipe her nose and cheek.

"What?" Hancock looked surprised, his black eyes flickering to Nate and then back to her. "But I remember, I was there, I carried you for nine months, Maddy!" the ghoul played hysteria for a moment and Madelyn's face lightened up. She smiled, giggles bubbling up out of her.

Nate squeezed her and kissed her hair. She continued to hold onto him, her arms unable to wrap around his whole chest. "Come on, we'll get you back to Sanctuary and get you fixed up."

"Okay," she whispered and stood up.

* * *

Nate stood back, watching as the doctor treated Madelyn. Someone leaned against the wall next to him. When Nate glanced over at him he smiled a little. "Hey there, Nick." But the synth didn't smile, in fact, he looked upset. Like, pissed upset.

"Nate."

"What is it?"

"That girl's distracted you from someone," the synth's yellow eyes avoided his partner, disappointment obvious on his face.

"Oh, God," Nate breathed, the weight of guilt suddenly making his chest feel like he'd just been hit by a car.

"Yeah, you might want to talk to your son, he hasn't seen you in months." The detective's arms were folded over his chest and he refused to meet Nate's stare.

"I've just–"

"Been busy, yeah, with another kid, and your _son_ doesn't understand why his own father doesn't want to spend time with him." The synth pushed away from the wall. "I know… I know he's not… the _real_ Shaun, Nate," the synth finally looked at him. "You killed your real son, but this synth, this boy, believes he is your Shaun, and he's been acting out because he thinks you don't care about him. And I tried to explain you have so many duties, and he understood for a little while, but then you show up with this girl that you treat like your own kid? He can tell you care about her differently than you do him."

"Nick, I–"

"Just… go, talk to your son."

Nate nodded and left the synth to find Shaun. The boy was sitting in Nate's old house in the room that had been his nursery. Nate remembered the day the bombs fell. He'd looked so different back then, shorter hair, cleaner shave, smoother skin even, and of course less of a tan, but he'd come into this room right before the bombs had fallen…

 _"_ _Mister Nate, Shaun has been changed, but he absolutely refuses to calm down. I think he needs some of that 'paternal affection' you seem to be so good at," Codsworth floated into the room and informed Nate and Nora. Then he drifted into the kitchen, around the bar and began to clean up after Nora, who had left the butter and jelly out from when she'd made him toast while the Mr. Handy left to clean up Shaun._

 _Nora gave a little laugh and leaned away where she'd been whispering in Nate's ear about that night's events and how she would wear her red dress to torture him until they got home. "You heard Codsworth. Go on. I'll be there in a moment." He got up and handed her his bowl of cereal, watching her as she ate her toast in a far more sexual way than was called for. He shook his head on his way to the nursery, coming up to the crib and peered down at his son. Upon seeing him, the baby's cries stopped and he smiled, reaching up for his daddy. The room was fairly plain for how much work went into it, but most of the work had been removing all the things that Nate's parents had added to the room. None of it was any good, and the things that Nora's parents gave them were brand new. A nice brown dresser, a red chair to match the couch and arm chair in the living room, a rocket ship rug that went with the wallpaper Nate had spent hours putting up because he didn't want to read the instructions and they hadn't gotten Codsworth yet._

 _Nate hated to admit it, but he liked Nora's parents more than his, which was odd since they didn't particularly care for him. He was twelve years older than their daughter, and he wasn't exactly the most traditional husband, but Nora loved him, and that was enough for him. He wanted to make them happy, though, and so he went out of his way to show that he was looking to be more than their son-in-law, and wanted to actually be their son._

 _"_ _Hey there, little guy, I'm not far," Nate leaned into the blue crib, tickling his fingers over Shaun's chest, making happy noises to encourage laughter from the baby boy. Even though he was wrapped up, he kicked his legs to show his happiness. Nate loved to watch him smile, grabbing at the cloth where his feet were hiding. If he wasn't wrapped up he would suck on his toes, which Nora disapproved of, but Nate thought it was the funniest thing._

 _"_ _How are the two most important men in my life doing?" Nora asked as she came up to the foot of the crib. Good thing he hadn't freed their son from his swaddling binds. "Hey, how's my little guy? Much better now, huh?" She reached in, tickling his feet through the cloth. "Mom just called, said they would be here in an hour, traffic in Lexington is crazy."_

 _"_ _Okay, so maybe we go to the park after they get here? And spend the hour we have getting Shaun a costume we actually like?" he gave her a smirk and she smiled back, laughing a little._

 _"_ _Sounds like a plan."_

 _"_ _Sir? Mum? You should come and see this!" Codsworth's voice depicted a sort of stress that Nate had only heard the one time the robot had knocked hot coffee onto their brand new white rug. Codsworth had felt absolutely horrible, but Nora had hated the white nuisance and took that chance to buy a brown one with red and pale circles dotting it. She said it really brought together the living room._

 _Nora's face twisted immediately into confusion, "Codsworth? What's wrong?" She reached into the crib and grabbed Shaun as Nate jogged into the living room._

 _"…_ _followed by… yes, followed by flashes. Blinding flashes. Sounds of explosions…. We're… we're trying to get confirmation…" the news anchor was visually upset, rubbing his forehead and running his hands through his hair. Nate and Nora had made jokes about how that man would never let his hair get messed up, but now he was running his fingers through it so many times no comb could fix it. Nate stood behind the couch, having to use the low back for support. What was happening? It couldn't be what he thought it was, not right after he finally accepted Vault-Tec's offer into a Vault; that was too… too perfect of timing._

 _"_ _What?" Nora's voice showed her fear._

 _"_ _But we have lost contact with our affiliate stations... We do have… coming in… confirmed repots, I repeat, confirmed repots of nuclear detonations in New York and Pennsylvania. My God…" and the news anchor was gone, lost with the signal. A siren blared outside pulling Nate back from where his mind has drifted off to in this moment of distress. It was exactly what he thought it was, and now he had to get his family to the Vault before a bomb killed them all._

 _Should they pack anything? The house was probably going to destroyed, and looted if nothing else. Nate felt a pain in his chest, he turned around, looking at his family. "Just a moment."_

 _He ran into the bedroom, hitting the walls every time he made a turn because of his speed and weight. Nate was one of the biggest guys in his unit. It was something that sometimes got annoying, but Nora had always made him feel better about it because she told him how sexy it made him. Since getting married and having Shaun, Nate had been out of the army, and that meant that he wasn't working out as often, so he'd grown soft, and his agility had suffered, but he was strong, and he was fast._

 _Nate didn't know what to expect in the Vault, but he didn't think that he should bring much with him. He grabbed a duffle bag and threw it on the bed, opening it to look inside. The bedroom was the larger of the two, the nursery across the hall only about ten square feet smaller. It was built in the corner of the house, giving them two windows next to each other showing the street in front of the house. It now flooded with people, pouring out of the homes and from army vehicles pulling up._

 _The duffle bag had been pre-packed, per Nate's military readiness training. It had a couple stimpaks, cans of food that would stay preserved for a couple centuries, and his trusty laser rifle. The weapon that had been presented to him upon his discharge. It was his own make, and he'd went through most of his service carrying it around. There were some other things in the bag, matches and the like, but he had taken account for what mattered. Then he pushed the bed out of the way, exposing a safe built into the floor where the headboard had been able to hide it perfectly._

 _"_ _Nate?" Nora's voice came from the living room, she was on the edge of tears. He hated himself for putting her through this stress, but he had to make sure he was prepared incase they left the Vault and didn't have anything._

 _"_ _Just a second, love," he called back, trying to keep his voice level. 44-56-77 he spun the dial and listened as it clicked. His, Nora's, and Shaun's birth years. Then he pulled it open, money, documents, and jewelry were neatly stacked in the safe. He frowned, pulling out his stimpaks and food, dumping it into the safe. The rifle wasn't going to fit, he had to think of something else. If only it were a pistol, he thought and closed the safe, locking it. "Codsworth!" he called, and the robot appeared. "I need you to saw a hole in the wall, here, behind the dresser, long enough for my rifle," he pointed to the spot and pushed the dresser out of the way. "Now!"_

 _"_ _Sir…" the robot looked very uncomfortable as he started his buzz saw and tore into the wallpaper and drywall. Nate covered his mouth and watched as people outside ran for the Vault. He hoped there was time, and he hoped this was worth it. "May I ask why you're hiding the laser rifle?" Codsworth asked as he moved so that Nate could place the rifle in the wall, then he put the drywall piece back in place, and pushed the dresser back._

 _"_ _I might need it in the future," he said simply, and then ran out into the living room, "We need to get to the Vault. Now!"_

 _"_ _I've got Shaun, let's go!" Nora was obviously relieved now that they were moving. Codsworth moved out of the way, ending up in the corner, but Nate didn't look at him, Nate didn't even think about the robot, only getting out of the house and up to the Vault._

 _"_ _Residents of Sanctuary Hills, if you are registered, evacuate to Vault 111 immediately!"_

Shaun sat in the red armchair that Nate had pushed to face the destroyed crib when he'd first come out of the vault and was too in grief to even move. The boy's head tilted slightly, he knew that Nate was there, but acted like he didn't. A normal ten-year-old boy wouldn't have been able to hear him approach. This thought made Nate frown. He didn't want to think like that, but it was the little things that reminded Nate that his son wasn't really his son.

"Shaun?"

"Yeah?" The boy didn't look at him. Nate didn't know what to say, so he just stood in the doorway. "Why don't I remember anything about this house?" Shaun asked suddenly. Nate's brows lifted and the boy turned to look over his shoulder at him. "This house doesn't even feel familiar…"

"It's really complicated, Shaun," Nate whispered and came forward to kneel beside him. "You were… not even a year old when you lived here, before we went to the Vault and then the Institute stole you from me," he rested his hand on the boy's black haired head.

Shaun leaned out of the touch and Nate frowned. "You treat me different than that girl. She was here, looking around. I made her go away."

"Madelyn came in here?" he asked. "What did you say to her?"

"I told her she wasn't supposed to be here. You don't let anyone in here," Shaun looked at him. The synth was so close to accurate, it tricked him sometimes, but right now, he could see it in his eyes. Shaun had Nora's eyes, and he knew that because even grown up Shaun had the same eyes, but this Shaun was wrong. His eyes were dull.

"Were you nice to her?"

"No," he turned away from Nate then, glaring at the crib.

"Why weren't you nice?"

"She's stealing you from me," the boy said without looking away from the crib, his arms folding over his chest.

"No she's not, Shaun…."

"She is!" the boy snapped at him then. "I saw it! You always talk to her, or about her! Even John loves her more!" he was shouting, and tears were filling his eyes and spilling onto his cheeks. "I'm your son! And you don't even remember me!"

"I never forget you, Shaun," Nate reached for the boy. At first Shaun pulled away, but Nate moved around the chair and wrapped his arms around him tightly, holding him against his thick chest. The boy settled down a little.

"Do you love me? Dad?" he sniffled.

Now Nate's eyes burned. "Of course, Shaun, I'm so sorry I make you feel like I don't. I do love you, Shaun." The man rested his chin on Shaun's head, tears running down his cheeks into his boy's hair.

"Are you crying, dad?" Shaun moved his head, trying to look up at him, but Nate shook his head and kept the boy from being able to look at him.

"As soon as I find out what happened to the settlers who went missing I will retire as general, and I'll stay home with you, and we can make trips to Goodneighbor as a family with John…" Nate pulled away to look at his son. "I'm sorry, Shaun. I've been the worst father to you…."

"It's okay, dad," Shaun reached up and wiped away the tears wetting Nate's beard. "I can wait until you retire."

"You shouldn't have to," the Sentinel frowned at his boy. He had a responsibility to this son. Sure, his real Shaun had sort of forced this synthetic version of him onto Nate, but he'd done it _for_ Nate, so that he could be a father.

"Will that girl be my new sister?" Shaun asked then.

Nate smiled a little. "Her name is Madelyn, Shaun, and sort of. I have to take care of her, like I take care of you. So she is kind of like a daughter to me."

"I should say sorry to her," he frowned, and Nate nodded his agreement.

"Yeah, we don't want her thinking you hate her…."

"Okay, I'll wait a little while. I'm still mad at her," the boy sat back in the chair. "I learned you're older than Nick," Shaun said suddenly, changing the subject to something happier.

"Oh? Is that so?"

"Yeah, he was only twenty-nine when the bombs fell," Shaun explained and Nate smiled at his boy.

* * *

Nate grabbed the pillow from the top of the bed and smiled. Hancock rolled his eyes. "You like this face-to-face stuff, don't you?" the ghoul's rough voice showed his amusement.

"I get off faster when seeing your face," he explained. "We don't have all the time in the world tonight, I want to head out pretty early."

"Oh, just a quickie? That's all I'm good for?" Hancock looked away dramatically, the back of his fingers pressed to his lips. Nate bent over him and wrapped an arm around his waist to lift the ghoul's bum off the mattress and put the pillow under him. "Jesus you're so fucking strong," he growled, his eyes flickering up to Nate. Smiling widely, Nate wet his palm and massaged his length. Then he collected a pool of saliva in his fingers and gently caressed the ghoul's tight hole.

"It's been a while since we've done this," Nate whispered to himself, his eyes rolling over the ghoul from face to ass. John's legs were wide, open for Nate to take him. The general moved forward and rubbed his head around the slick entrance. When he thought John was ready he started to move his hips in a gentle rock, pressing against the ghoul's hole.

"Fuck, this is always the hardest part," John breathed, his eyes closed in concentration. "Force yourself to relax," he coached himself and then gritted his teeth in an almost laugh. Nate pushed his head in then, and stopped when he felt the ghoul clamp around him. "Fuck you and your fat cock," the ghoul moaned and Nate smiled, leaning down over him with a smile.

"Thought you loved my fat cock," he asked, his face an inch away from the glaring ghoul.

"Shut up and fuck me, Nate," John growled, his arms wrapping around his lover's neck to draw him into lusting kiss. Nate's hips moved slowly at first, and then picked up. John moaned against his lips, arching his back and dragging his nails down Nate's shoulders. Nate pulled away from the ghoul's kiss so that he could dampen his palm with a wet lick, then he grabbed John's dick and stroked the length of it. "Damn it, how the hell do you do this to me?"

"I just know how to love you, John." Nate supported his weight with his strong arm next to the ghoul's head, so that he could hold his face over his and continue to message his cock. John flexed around him, tightening as Nate pushed into him and relaxed when he pulled out. "Oh, John," he breathed, surprised.

"Yeah, got my own tricks," the ghoul grunted and gritted his teeth as Nate picked up the pace. The sound of skin slapping together was almost enough to be heart over the radio floating in from the living room. John's fingers drug down his shoulders and then grabbed the back of Nate's neck to pull him into another kiss.

The beds they were on were strong, but they hammered against the wall with the force Nate had. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, yes, fuck, Nate, fuck," John grunted with each of his thrusts. Now he was tight around him, and it felt so good, Nate had to close his eyes in pleasure. His hand around John's cock moved to message his balls and Nate felt them tighten.

"Ah, fuck, John…." Nate exploded inside the ghoul, trusting as deep as he could, finishing in a pulse of come filling his lover to the point he felt it leaking out.

Hancock also finished, having felt Nate's throbbing length inside him pushed him over the edge. John finished in the space between them, getting his sticky come all over both of their stomachs and onto his own chest. Nate smiled at him, triumphantly. "Oh, damn it, was hoping I could hold that off and give you shit for it later…"

"I always finish you off, don't I?" Nate asked, his mouth moving down the ghoul's neck and onto his chest. He licked up the salty liquid. "Damn, you taste pretty good this time," he commented. As he moved lower and lower, he felt himself soften and fall out of John.

"I ate a salad for lunch," the ghoul shrugged and watched Nate lick his uneven skin. "It's not fair how sexy you are. How can you even look at me?"

Surprised, Nate looked up, his mouth had almost made it to John's shrinking head. "What?"

"You can have… anyone, Nate," John frowned, looking at the ceiling now. "Anyone; women, men, others, they would trip over themselves for you. I know so many of them are better than me."

"John," Nate moved off of the man and lay beside him. After the ghoul finally looked at him Nate saw the pain in his eyes, he was genuinely worried. "I love you, John, I don't understand where this is coming from."

"You're human, how can you… look at me and not wish I was?" he looked down at himself. "My skin is… disgusting. You can't tell me you don't wish it was smooth," he looked at Nate then.

"It never occurred to me, John," he ran a hand over the ghoul's chest. His fingers dipped and bobbed over the wrinkled skin. "This is you, this is the only you I've known. And I love you, John."

"Don't you miss Nora? How she felt to you?"

Nate felt a pain in his chest. "I miss her, but… it's not as bad anymore, and I don't even…" he closed his eyes. "I don't really think about her anymore. Sometimes something will remind me of her, but it's not like it was before. You're my everything, John," he touched the ghoul's face, meeting his stare. "You, John McDonough, are everything to me."

The ghoul's face twisted, his eyes soft like a puppy's and his lips pursed in a shaking frown. "Damn it, you…" John wrapped his arms around Nate and held him. The Sentinel held him, giving the side of his baldhead kisses.

"Don't question my love for you, please," Nate whispered in his ear. "Not unless you think I'm mistreating you."

"I don't think you can mistreat anyone, you big, fucking teddy bear."

"I'm your fucking teddy bear."

"And its amazing fucking."

They laughed and relaxed for a moment holding each other before Nate kissed the man's forehead and rolled out of the bed, "I told Shaun he could sleep with us tonight, so we need to get dressed for bed."

"Okay, but he's sleeping on your side, my springs are already shot."

"Well, if you wouldn't have pushed me down…"

"You fucking loved that, don't even blame me," the ghoul pointed a finger at him.

Nate rolled his eyes playfully and grabbed a pair of shorts and slipped them on. Hancock got up and joined Nate on his side of the bed where a dresser had been shoved into the corner. After a few minutes of shuffling through the clothes Hancock picked up a bright pair of yellow shorts and looked back at Nate, curiosity and amusement painted his face.

"Don't…." He waved a hand at him and looked away from the ghoul going into the living room to turn down the radio. Shaun was playing in the backyard just down the hill with Dogmeat. When Nate poked his head out he saw the boy throw a baseball and the dog leap high into the air to catch it. "Shaun! Time for bed," he called and the boy smiled at him, grabbing Dogmeat by the bandana.

"Okay, dad, be right there."

Nate watched Shaun wrestle the ball out of the dog's mouth before turning to head into his kitchen and grab a drink before heading back to his bedroom. "Do you want anything, John?"

"Nah, I'll just sip off whatever you have."

A gentle knock on the door stopped Nate from grabbing a water can from the cooler. He turned around and opened the door seeing Mama Murphy. "Oh, Mama, how are you? Come on in," Nate stepped aside and she smiled.

"Oh, Nate, always so polite." She shuffled in and looked around with her hazy blue eyes. "Your boys here?"

"Hancock's in the bedroom and Shaun's playing with Dogmeat in the yard, but he should be here in a second," Nate explained. "Did you want something to drink?"

"You got any wine, kid?"

"Of course," Nate grabbed a water can while she sat down on the couch across from the radio. He then looked for the wine to pour her a cup, he was happy he'd picked up the one nice glass he'd found in Vault 111. "What brings you over, Mama?"

"Just wanted to see you, you have been so busy, kid, and I heard you'll be leaving in the morning, probably before I'm gonna wake up." She sighed and relaxed in the couch.

"That Mama?" Hancock smiled, coming into the living room.

"Who else would it be? Not many old folk around here," she smiled at the ghoul.

"Oh, stop, you got nothing on me," he sat down next to her. John had thrown on one of Nate's shirts, which swallowed him, and made him look far smaller than he was.

"Shush, you," she waved a hand at Hancock who smirked.

"Here you go, Mama," Nate handed her the cup and she smiled her thanks before tipping back a sip. "I'm sorry we haven't talked yet, I know I said hi at the party, but I should have spent more time with you."

"It's fine, Nate, stop worrying about me. I had a nice time talking to Madelyn. She's a sweet kid, but she's got so much going on…" she frowned then and her eyes looked far away.

"What do you mean?" John's gruff voice showed his concern.

"It's nothing for you to worry about, she has to deal with it herself." The old woman waved a hand at them and then smiled. "There was something I wanted to talk to you about."

"What is it?" Nate sat down in the single chair and opening the water can, taking a sip of it while Mama spoke.

"Freedom is expecting puppies," she said, and Nate raised an eyebrow. That was her big important news? "Dogmeat's gonna be a daddy," she smiled and Hancock laughed.

"That dirty dog," he smirked and Nate handed him the water.

"That really what you wanted me to come all the way home for?"

"No, I wanted you to spend some time with your family," she frowned just a little. "I know you're important, Nate, but you can't go off and forget ya family all the time. You get lost in your work, and… it hurts us here." Nate felt her words strike him in the heart.

"I told Shaun after I find out what happened to the settlers at Hangman's Ally I'm going to retire. I'll be here 24/7 then, and you'll get sick of me." The man smile and Mama laughed a little.

"I don't think anyone can get tired of ya, kid."

"Dad?" Shaun came in and looked around. Dogmeat shoved passed him and sat at Nate's feet for a moment, so happy he looked to be dancing on his bum.

"Come in, Shaun," Nate lifted an arm for the boy to come to him and sit in his lap. He had missed the whole development of his son between one and ten, and now it felt strange, even after a year, to hold such a large boy.

Mama looked between the boys happily. "What an amazing family you have here, Nate. Hold onto it, kid."

"I will," Nate promised and Mama nodded knowingly as she sipped on her wine.


	12. Starlight in Daylight

Madelyn stood at the door of the Sentinel's house. She had just lifted her hand to knock when she heard Nate speak. Pausing, she listened him say he was planning on retiring after finding out what happened to the settlers that had gone missing at Hangman's Ally. He was going to retire so soon? That… that was going to ruin all of her plans.

Suddenly her heart pounded against her ribcage. What was she supposed to do? She couldn't go back to the Prydwen before Nate could vouch for her to be an Initiate, Maxson would…

She flinched at the thought and turned around to leave the Sentinel's home. What was she going to do? She had to delay them.

No that was selfish, there were lives at stake. Settlers had gone missing, and she was going to try and slow them down from finding out where they went? She couldn't believe herself.

"Thanks, Sturges." Madelyn paused where she was when she saw Piper leaving an interesting looking house built up on the foundation next to Nate's. The mechanic was standing in the doorway with a bare chest and heavy pants hanging low on his waist. He wasn't looking anywhere but at the woman leaving him.

"You could stay," he smiled.

"You'd like that, wouldn't you," she waved over her shoulder without looking at him. Madelyn was standing next to the large tree in the middle of the cul-de-sac, so neither of them noticed her. When Sturges closed the door Madelyn sat down between two large roots and looked up at the sky. She didn't know what she was going to do. She couldn't let herself be selfish enough to put her own plans in front of lives of settlers under Nate's care. She already had the weight of her secrets weighting her down; she didn't need the guilt of people's deaths being on her hands too.

The sky was beautiful here. She wished she could see it like this on the Prydwen, or even from her bunk at the Citadel. Sure she could see stars, but the lights hid many of them, and here… Sanctuary turned its lights off at night, so the sky was limitless above her. Just like back in Hangman's Ally.

"There you are, staring at the sky again, I should have known," a familiar voice made Madelyn smile despite her inner conflict.

"Hey," she sighed, looking up at MacCready as he leaned against the tree, his own eyes turned up to the sky.

"Looks just like it did the other night," he shrugged. She copied the movement.

"It's not that it looks different… it's just… beautiful," Madelyn sighed and rested her head against the trunk of the tree.

"You slept outside on your birthday, didn't you?" he asked, and she could feel his stare.

"I couldn't find anywhere to sleep," she said simply, avoiding eye contact.

"There are beds in the bunkhouse… that's what it's there for."

"You… were there," she found herself saying without her permission. She grimaced at herself and closed her eyes, turning her face down so that he couldn't see it in the moonlight.

He didn't say anything for a moment, and then she heard him sit down against the tree as well. "Duncan went to sleep a little while ago. He asked about you."

"What'd you tell him?" she asked, her stare returning to the stars.

"That you were still hurt and wanted alone time."

It had been true. After Nate brought her into the settlement she'd gone to the medic and gotten patched up. It took two stimpaks for her to feel normal again, and she would carry a couple bruises the next few days, but no permanent, physical damage. Mentally, though, she was constantly on the edge of tears. She didn't understand why this encounter had gotten to her so much. She'd shot people, and in the moment she'd been fine….

"I've… killed before, but this time… it was different."

"Have you ever done it with your hands?" the sniper asked, his voice soft. She shook her head, but realized he couldn't see and whispered her answer. "It's different when it's far away, and when you use a weapon… it makes it," he thought for a second for the word, "I guess it makes it easier. You can detach yourself from it."

"He was going to kill me, I saw it," she whispered.

"Yeah," was all MacCready said and they were quiet for a really long time, and Madelyn just watched the stars dance with the branches above them. It was nice knowing he was there, but also not having to talk. Some people didn't understand how powerful silence was.

The moon had crossed the tree by the time Madelyn felt the weight of sleep on her eyelids. She thought about the events of the day again, and then stood up. "Hey, I'm gonna go to bed," she whispered and stepped around the tree. MacCready looked up at her, his eyes coming into focus as if he'd been zoning out. Then he smiled at her. "What?"

"I think I'm changing your name to moony Maddy," he said lazily.

"Hah, why?" she raised an eyebrow at him.

"Just trying different things out, you like the stars," he waved his hand and got up off the ground.

She looked him over and gestured to the missing sleeve of his coat, showing the green one that should have been covered. "What happened there?"

He glanced at it and smirked, "A story for another time, can't tell you everything at once, or you might stop coming back."

"Coming back? You're the one stalking me," she snorted, leading the way to the bunkhouse.

"Stalking? That's a bit of a harsh word." He then laughed a little, "Besides, maybe you're the one stalking me."

"Oh? How do you figure that?"

"Well, you knew I was going to come to Sanctuary, so you were here when I got here. And then you were hanging out with my son this morning, so of course I would have to come talk to you. Oh yeah, and just a few hours ago you were probably hiding in the bushes watching me, so you knew I was going on a walk."

"Do you know just how ridiculous you sound?"

"Nope." She laughed and shook her head. Without thinking about it she reached up and started running her hands through her hair, pulling it into a pony tail then letting it fall back down. "What're you thinking about?" he asked as they passed the clubhouse.

"I need a hair cut… I was thinking about something like what Rowan had. An Initiate girl I knew had something similar but had lines in the side," she explained, gesturing and MacCready nodded.

"That's a pretty intense style for you."

"For me?" she raised an eyebrow at him. "Don't think little Madelyn Alexandria Dangerfield is intense enough for a haircut?" she taunted.

"Well with a name like that," he looked at her in surprise. "You said the Brotherhood named you? I can tell. I withdraw my testimony," he lifted his hands in surrender and she giggled lightly.

They stopped outside the bunkhouse. She wasn't sure why they stopped, but she didn't feel as tired now after the walk through the brisk air from the tree. "So," she looked around at the front gate where two women were talking, leaning against a guard tower.

"So?" the sniper raised an eyebrow at her, a smile pulling at his lips.

Madelyn didn't know what to say or do so she turned toward the door and reached for the handle to let them in. MacCready's hand reached out and gently took her shoulder, turning her just enough that he brushed his lips over her forehead. It wasn't at all what she'd expected and she felt her heart skip a beat. Her breath left her in a soft sound and when he straightened back up he looked at her expression proudly. "That… was," she swallowed, "Unexpected."

"Gotta keep you on your toes, shorty," he remarked playfully and placed his hand on hers to open the door. Once open he slipped passed her and slid into the darkness.

Madelyn stood in the doorway for a second and tried to remember what just happened. He'd kissed her forehead. And it had felt really nice, warming up her belly with a tingle she'd never felt before. Her breathing was uneven and she didn't think she would be able to go to sleep right away tonight.

* * *

The sun wasn't even up yet when a hand on her shoulder woke Madelyn. She had went to bed in the bunk next to MacCready's, and damn had it been hard on her to fall asleep. One reason being the moonlight came in right on their faces and she'd spent half the time staring at him and the other half trying to sleep with the bright white light behind her eyelids. The other reason was that MacCready had quite easily went to sleep and he snored. It wasn't a loud noise, but it was just audible and inconsistent enough to keep her from sleep. If she wouldn't have been so tired she might even have thought the little snorts were cute.

And then there was Duncan.

How the hell did that man sleep with that kid in his arms? The boy rolled over every five minutes making the springs in the bed scream in protest. And he murmured in his sleep, talking nonsense, punctuating every other sentence with a furious kick. At some point she'd even seen him kick his father right between his legs. The sniper didn't wake up, though, and released a snore of protest before rolling onto his back and throwing an arm above his head.

Madelyn didn't know how long she had actually slept, but Nate's hand was the most unwelcomed wakeup call she'd ever had. Absently she remembered the Sentinel telling her they were going to head out early this morning. Absently she remembered that she'd promised to be bright eyed and bushy tailed. Absently she remembered she hadn't actually fallen sleep until probably an hour ago.

"Sentinel," she moaned and rolled over, flinging her arm over her face.

"Time to get up," he said and she pulled her arm away when he turned to the sniper. Nate grabbed MacCready's hat from where it hung on the wall above him and threw it down forcefully, striking the man in the face. Shooting up right, MacCready had a knife in his hand and glared up at Nate with narrow eyes filled with sleep.

"Chr–jeeze, Nate, good way to get yourself killed," the man breathed and put the knife away. Nate didn't look worried and patted Duncan on the head. The kid was still sleeping soundly, his fists balled up under his jaw propping his head up on the pillow he'd stolen from his father.

Madelyn took her time getting out of the bed. She had to fix her clothes and adjust some buttons. Apparently she had rolled around a lot. It took her several groans and a strong heave to get off the bed, never before had a mattress been so unwilling to let her go.

"You okay, Maddy?" MacCready was standing beside her, she hadn't noticed him get up and ready so fast. He'd already put on his coat and boots and was ready to head out. How embarrassing, she was normally much better at waking up, even with little-to-no sleep.

"Are you?" she asked, remembering last night.

"I'm great, haven't slept that good in a while," he smiled left her to get ready. He was a strange creature.

As quickly as she could manage Madelyn fixed her clothes and searched her backpack to make sure she didn't need anything else. When she thought she had her bases covered she stood and fixed the coat she wore. She really wanted to get something that fit her better. At this point she was willing to mismatch equipment if she could just get something comfortable and form fitting.

Outside the bunkhouse Nate was talking to Hancock and MacCready. Hancock was smoking a cigarette, and offered a puff to MacCready who told him he was trying to quit the habit. Hancock nodded and took the last drag and flicked the bud into the street to die on its own. Nate rustled her hair when she joined them. "What's the plan?" she asked and tried to brush her hair down and pull it back into a ponytail, but let it go when she realized she didn't have anything to tie it with.

"Hancock, Nick, and Piper are going to check out Sunshine Tidings Co-op, they haven't responded to the radio check ins, and neither has Oberland Station, which they'll check on after. We," he gestured to himself, her and MacCready, "are going to Starlight Drive-in. They reported seeing some suspicious behavior nearby, and if the pattern holds up, they are right in the path of these settlement attacks," Nate frowned. Nate had just checked on Oberland Station, could they have been lost that quickly?

"Don't worry, Sentinel," she squeezed his upper arm, the muscle was so thick she could barely close her fingers enough to actually apply pressure, "we'll find out what happening to these settlements."

The large man nodded and gestured for them to get moving. Before departing he gave Hancock a quick kiss to which the ghoul smiled at. Madelyn watched the interaction and felt a warmth in her chest. She couldn't imagine them not being together like that now. At first she had been so surprised, but it made sense. They were perfect for each other, and she only wished she could find that in someone.

The three of them traveled in a long silence. Madelyn took this time to watch Nate and MacCready's interactions with each other and found it quite interesting. The Sentinel took the lead and the sniper walked beside him but half a step back, and while Nate didn't carry his weapon ready, MacCready's sniper rifle was held across his front, prepared. When Nate stopped, MacCready stopped, and without words between them they maintained the same distance and position in the road, moving in an almost synchronized fashion.

Madelyn, on the other hand, walked behind them, her short form seeming to be exaggerated without the thin ghoul to compare herself to. MacCready was lean, but he was still a bit thicker built than Hancock, and Nate was just… muscles on muscles. With the morning light she was able to see that he had actually shaved: cleaned up his beard and his ponytail was gone. In fact, all the hair she would normally see with his hat on was gone. Shaved clean down to the scalp. It wasn't until he was grabbing his black-rimmed sunglasses from the back of his neck that he realized she was staring openly at him, her mouth ajar.

"Something wrong, Maddy?"

"You're, uh, hair, Nate," she whispered and he smiled. It was so weird to be able to see the skin of his jaw. It was like when Elder Maxson would trim his beard: something you thought about but were still caught off guard when it actually happened.

"Yeah, it was getting out of hand." He lifted up his hat to show her the remaining black mess atop his head. "I don't cut it that often, but old habits die hard, I can never shave it completely."

MacCready coughed something she didn't understand and Nate elbowed the sniper in the upper arm. "Hey, watch it, solder boy."

"Be nice." Nate rested his pointed hat back down on his head and adjusted his sunglasses. Madelyn picked up the pace to keep beside the Sentinel. MacCready didn't have a problem with his long legs, but she wasn't so fortunate. Nate had never moved so quick with her in tow, so the burning in her legs forced her to slow down after they passed through Concord's south side. "We should stop and check on Trudy before we hit Starlight," Nate said casually to MacCready who nodded and then seemed to notice that Madelyn was falling behind.

The sniper slowed his pace slightly, allowing the General of the Minutemen to take point and walk on a few paces in front of them. "He's just worked up," he told her.

"What?"

"Nate. He only power walks like that when he's pissed." She met the sniper's blue eyes and shrugged.

"I haven't noticed."

"And that's why you look like you've just run a mile at a sprint? Obviously you aren't used to maintaining the Walker Walk."

"'Walker Walk'?" she raised an eyebrow at him and he smiled.

"Yeah, apparently his wife did the same thing. Their friends called it the 'Walker Walk' when they look like they are just walking all normal, but you have to run to keep up with them." MacCready shifted the rifle in his arms and stretched.

"Oh," she forgot that Nate had been married to a woman, and that he was from before the war. "Do you know Nate well?"

"Well enough to trust him with my life. He saved Duncan. I'm not sure I could have done it without him, I was… I was almost killed when we went. I got hurt pretty damn bad," he touched his side and she felt a pain in her chest at the thought of him injured. "I told him to go on without me, and to take the medicine where it needed to go…. He wouldn't leave me, gave me our last stimpak even though his right arm was broken." MacCready sighed and looked at her. "I know he would have saved Duncan if I wouldn't have made it. But he didn't leave me, and since then, I've known that I could trust him."

"But there still seems to be something between you two?" Madelyn cocked her head to the side. The morning light was bright, and low enough to show MacCready's face despite his hat.

"He's Brotherhood. And… I just," he shrugged. "I can't really accept that."

Ouch. She looked away. "I'm Brotherhood," she whispered and felt his stare.

"Yeah, but you're young, you don't… act like them. You don't want to kill off Hancock just because he's a ghoul."

"I did," she sighed and avoided looking at him. "But neither does Nate," she added, before he could say anything.

"I guess it's… Danse," it looked like it was hard for MacCready to say his name. She frowned. "I tried to hate the guy, he was Brotherhood through and through, but I was with Nate when he went to confront Danse…." His nose scrunched. "I knew how much Nate cared about him. They were like… real brothers. More than that, even. I'm not sure how Danse felt about Nate, but I knew he respected him and trusted him with his life. What happened was… digusting."

"What do you mean?" Madelyn frowned, looking at him now.

"Nate tried to talk him out of it. He… tried real hard. But Danse was just," he shook his head, looking disappointed. "I can't say I hated Danse, that'd be a lie. I hate what he stood and died for, though. I hate what Danse made Nate do, and I hate what it did to him." His blue eyes flicked toward her. "Nate used to be a pretty happy guy, like, happier than he seems now. He'd always crack jokes and never let anyone get the best of him. He and that tin can were… a great team." MacCready sighed and shrugged his shoulders. "I guess I lost a little love for General Walker when he did that."

It was strange to hear MacCready talk about this. She'd only heard rumors and what Nate had told her once. He'd said that Danse and him were almost like Hancock and him. Is that what Danse would have wanted? What would have happened if Nate had been able to talk him out of it?

"What did you do? You said you were there?"

"I waited outside," MacCready looked at the back of Nate who was just far enough away he probably couldn't hear them. "I helped Nate take out the protectrons that were there and when we got down to Danse he was… standing there in his orange Brotherhood uniform. I swear I'd only seen him outside of his power armor like five times. The man was huge, probably bigger than Nate," he puffed his shoulders as if to exhibit what he was saying. "I knew they needed to talk alone, so I went back outside. Nate came out about… three hours later? I don't know how much of the time had been them talking, but Nate had…" MacCready frowned, "Blood on him, and he looked like he'd been crying. I don't think I've seen him cry other than that time. He kept saying he 'tried to talk him out of it'. I don't think he was talking to me," the sniper shifted his rifle and let out a long breath. "It really fu–messed Nate up."

"I knew it had been hard on him," she said, looking at her Sentinel. "I saw a pair of Brotherhood of Steel holotags in his house. Those were Danse's weren't they?"

"Yeah, he won't let anyone in the house, it's been untouched since Codsworth…" MacCready winced.

"What happened to him?" no one had told her.

"That was before me… I guess Nate and him had been on their way to Diamond City when they fell into a Gunner ambush meant for– someone, not Nate…." MacCready rolled his shoulders, he was not comfortable talking about this stuff. She should really stop, but she was curious, and she knew it would be painful for Nate to tell her. "He carried him back to Sanctuary and put him in his house with everything else that is important to him."

"Why doesn't he keep it in the house he lives in? Or live in his old one?"

"I imagine it just hurts him too much to be there, and that stuff is… it's everything that he doesn't have anymore. Seeing it every day would probably kill him," he explained. She nodded her understanding.

"Do you have any more questions, Maddy?"

Both Madelyn and MacCready jumped at Nate's voice. He'd slowed down so now he was close. She felt horrible. "I'm sorry, Sentinel."

"Don't be," he looked over his shoulder at her. She saw his blue eyes were wet even through his sunglasses.

"How do you keep going?" she asked.

"Because I have to, otherwise everything was… for nothing, and I won't let all that I've lost be forgotten." Nate stopped and faced her as he spoke.

"No one will forget them, Nate," MacCready promised him. Nate met the sniper's stare and nodded his thanks.

"Come on, Trudy's shop is right up here," he gestured and they followed him in silence.

* * *

Starlight Drive in was amazing. It had towering buildings and could be seen easily from a distance. "Wow," Madelyn breathed. It looked more impressive than Diamond City.

"Yeah, this is kind of Nate's baby," MacCready chuckled with a smirk playing on his lips.

They approached the front gate, which had guard towers on either side, and turrets, and spotlights. From here she couldn't see much but the tops of buildings and Minutemen flags pinned up and flapping in the wind.

"It's the General!" someone shouted and the gates opened.

A main street split the settlement from the gate all the way back out of sight. Buildings of all shapes and kinds were built on either side, and spaced so that one could pass between them in ally way like paths. Nate didn't hesitate to head inside, but MacCready stood with Madelyn so that she could take in the sight. Neon lights and powered utilities moved and flashed, catching her off guard. Signs that said anything from 'OPEN' to 'KEEP OUT' kept her eyes darting from piece to piece.

Over the din of people she could hear the army of generators that kept the place running. She couldn't tell where they were until she stepped inside and saw them on top of the original, prewar building, stacked in neat rows with wires extended out to the whole settlement. "Wow," she whispered again.

"Come on, Nate's leaving us behind." MacCready's hand touched the small of her back and she glanced at him to see that his sniper rifle now rested on his back. With his prompting, she moved forward, taking in the streets that smelled of all sorts of things from food to grease, watching as people laughed and fought and worked. "Maybe tonight we'll go to the bar, you'd like Bond."

"Who's that?"

"The best bar tender I've met," MacCready smiled.

Nate had disappeared but the sniper seemed to know where he was going. "You come here often?"

He laughed and used his fist to stifle it. She raised an eyebrow. "You hitting on me?"

Her cheeks flushed and she looked away from him embarrassed, "I'm sorry, MacCready."

"Don't be sorry, and you don't have to call me that. Yeah, I've been here a lot. I try to stop by when going to Sanctuary. Mayor Slade has kept the place nice. I get good deals at the weapon's master down Crater Ally, I knew him before he moved here." They had a Mayor? And street names? Wow.

She was stuck on something he said before that, though. "What am I supposed to call you?"

"Well, you don't see me calling you Trouble-yard. Hmm, maybe I should," he smirked and she frowned hoping he was joking. "Oh, don't give me that look. I know your name's Dangerfield. As cool as calling you Trouble would be."

"I think that should be what I call you, seeing as you're the one that shot me. I don't know if I should be alone with you anymore." She raised a brow at him as they tuned onto an ally. She wasn't really paying attention to where they were anymore.

"Bad first impression, but you've been alone with me a lot since then. Seems like that's the only time you're safe," he added softly and Madelyn felt his thumb trace her skin where her neck met her shoulder and disappeared under her baggy clothing.

Her breathing had picked up and it took her a moment to realize they'd stopped. She wet her lips and swallowed, unable to tear her eyes away from his. Why did this keep happening? Never before had she been so captivated by someone. Sure she'd seen men on the Prydwen that were unnaturally attractive, and she's had her fair share of crushes. But something was different about MacCready. He… was new, exciting. He was different from all those men in the Brotherhood, and the more she learned about him the more she liked what she found. If anyone would have asked her before what she thought of a guy that had a kid from a previous marriage she probably would have said something like 'um, no thank you'. Add civilian to that, and one that actually exhibits a distain for the Brotherhood at that, and she would have told them she couldn't even make up someone she could tolerate like that. How narrow-minded.

Madelyn had, like most girls, imagined her future man, life, and kids. She just knew she was going to fall in love with a Brotherhood soldier, scribe or knight, maybe she'd meet them while an Initiate and they'd grow together. Or maybe she'd meet them when she was higher ranking, a paladin maybe. Either way she had plans on waiting for that person to experience a lot of her firsts. She didn't feel the need to just get into bed with anyone, and felt that plenty of other girls were like that. She wanted to be different, so she'd make her man wait, prove to her that they were going to be with her and her only.

They'd have a Brotherhood wedding, small, though, just close friends and family. Perhaps on the Prydwen's command desk. It would be perfect, and they'd both take leave and visit somewhere secluded and romantic for their first night together.

She would bring into the world strong, beautiful children that would grow up in the Brotherhood. They'd have their father's eyes and her auburn hair and…

MacCready had beautiful blue eyes, and he'd given them to Duncan. And Duncan had gotten his mother's auburn hair. She loved spending time with the boy, and he seemed to really like her too.

Madelyn's breathing was quick and shallow, and she noticed that MacCready's was too. What was he thinking about? Should she ask? Her mouth parted and she almost said something, but her lips were dry and no noise came out.

"R.J., Maddy, I think we have a lead," Nate's voice broke them from their trance and they both looked at the General as he stopped to stare at them. "Am I interrupting something?" His brows pulled together and he looked at MacCready with narrowed eyes. Whoa, what was that for?

"No, we were just talking about visiting the bar if we had time tonight," MacCready said easily, waving a hand as he spoke. She noticed when he explained things his head tilted forward, opposite the hand he was gesturing with.

"Okay, well, Slade said that a scavenging team saw a group dressed in odd clothes with what looked like prisoners. The prisoners looked like settlers and there were about fifteen of them."

"That's a lot of people, how could they pacify them? How big was the group taking them?" MacCready's brow creased.

"Something between five and ten. But the scavenging team assumed there were more elsewhere, and these were just the ones taking prisoners." Nate frowned and looked around the space they were in. Madelyn also took the moment to look. The Mayor's house was a large metal one that looked far nicer than the other buildings, and quite spacious. It was built in the shade of the prewar screen, and up on stilts to give it a high, leveled appearance. There were two giant lion statues on either side of the entrance.

"Where were they headed?"

"Southwest," Nate sighed and put his hands on his hips. "I don't like this. I…" he glared, chewing on his lip.

"You want to check on Hancock, Piper, and Nick, don't you?"

"I don't think I could forgive myself if something happened to them," Nate frowned.

"They'll be fine, Nate, you can't do everything. I'm sure they're already at Sunshine. Hey, we'll go to the radio tower and see if we can get them to respond, yeah?" MacCready flung his thumb over his shoulder.

"I think I'm going to buy some clothes, if that's okay," Madelyn said, smiling warmly at Nate when he glanced at her.

"I'm sorry, Madelyn, I should have offered you something more comfortable at Sanctuary…."

"Don't worry about it, I'll be fine, I have some caps I've been saving up."

"And I gave her the two hundred that Hancock paid be fore slapping Sturges's ass–" he winced. "I mean butt. Whatever," he waved a hand.

"Okay, I'll meet you two for lunch, the bar up front should be open by then."

"You're payin' right?" MacCready raised an eyebrow at the larger man who snorted.

"Depends on what you buy."

"Deathclaw steak, of course, you know me better than that, Natie," the ex-mercenary smirked and the General rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, okay," and he left without another word, obvious that he was not comfortable anymore.

"Why'd you do that?" she lifted an eyebrow at MacCready.

He looked surprised. "I enjoy messing with him. So we getting you a haircut too?" he took a lock of her hair between his first and middle fingers.

"I'm not sure," she looked upward as if she could see her own hair. "It is getting out of hand… and I can't wash it as much as I would like to."

"What?" he looked confused. "How often do you want to wash it?"

She looked uncomfortable. "Oh… I don't know, like… every two or three days?"

"Jesus…" he breathed. She swallowed suddenly feeling gross was that not normal? Did he think she was gross? "How do you have access to that kind of water?"

Oh. "Well, the Prydwen is right above a massive body of water…." She shrugged.

"I'd love to shower more than twice a month," he frowned a little, looking away from her as his ears turned red. Awe, was that his embarrassed face?

"Don't worry, I don't think you smell," she smiled, then added, "Much."

"Nice," he nodded, smiling. "Come on, the stores are this way."

MacCready led the way back into the town and down Crater Ally. She wondered why it was called that until they came up to a pool of water in a massive hole in the ground. The water had two purifiers stuck in it and a gate to keep people out. Around the pool were shops of all kinds and trades, even a couple of the same with different prices advertised.

"What were you wanting? One piece? Several pieces?" MacCready asked and paused for her answer.

"I have no idea… I've never…" she looked at the stores. "I've only ever had a uniform. I've never picked my own outfits."

"What about when you were off duty?"

Her cheeks burned. "I, uh, just… wore my uniform."

"Wow," the ex-mercenary nodded once, it was slow dip of his head and then he looked around. "Well, lets see what they have in your size then."

Madelyn had never really gone shopping before. And she decided she hated it. It was a huge waste of time. She spent well into two hours with MacCready going from shop to shop trying to find something that would fit her and that she felt comfortable in. She had tried on some ridiculous things and didn't plan on going back any time soon.

"I still think that harness was pretty nice, shorty."

She sighed and rubbed the back of her hand over her forehead realizing just how much she was sweating from all of the on and off of the clothes. The make the process quicker she had just stayed in the dressing room and allowed MacCready to hand her clothing through the curtain. She had done her best to keep him from being able to see her between dressings and realized half way through that she'd never been shy about her body with the Brotherhood, so why was she with him all of a sudden?

"Yeah, if I was a raider and thought my breasts could stop a bullet," she sighed and looked down at herself. She was rubbing raw in places because of the ill-fitting wears.

"Hey," MacCready stopped and looked at her, straightening himself on her so she had to look at him. "What's got you down?"

"I… I don't like this, shopping," she scrunched her nose and shrugged. "I'm tired now, and I guess I'm still a bit cranky from last night."

"'Cranky from last night'?" he frowned. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have kissed you. It was rash of me." MacCready's blue eyes shifted away and suddenly he seemed like he couldn't look at her.

"Oh, no," she whispered, her voice thick all of a sudden. "No, it wasn't you, well, not really," she verbally stumbled over herself. "I just… I didn't sleep much, and I forgot we were waking up so early." She swallowed and he peaked back at her. "I, uh, liked… the kiss."

At that he looked at her again, his expression soft. "I was worried I'd moved too fast for you."

"Oh, no," she shook her head. "If anything, I'd been waiting for it," she blurted and then her cheeks went red. His eyebrows lifted and she was just as shocked as him. "I can't… believe I said that."

"There's not taking that back," he smirked.

Her face was red as a tato. "Okay, but if you bring it up again, I won't forgive you for shooting me."

"That's a bit intense, don't you think?"

"Well, intensity is my thing, remember?" she ran a hand through her hair. "Maybe it's time for that haircut, and then we'll look at more clothes."

"Okay, shorty," he waved ahead of them, "Barber's that way."

"I still don't know what I want," she sighed as they made their way over to the very cheery woman who was quickly clipping away at a lady's hair.

"Thought you wanted the shaved sides and lines," he looked confused.

"Well, I don't want to regret it. Last time I got a hair cut I was pretty disappointed." She frowned at the memory. She had let her brother talk her into getting just the standard Brotherhood cut.

"What did you get?"

"Oh, it's just," she circled her hand around her head, "Uh… short? I guess, all over, and then I hand bangs."

"Oh, bangs." He looked just as horrified as she did at the thought.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure my brother just wanted me to look like a boy."

"Probably to keep the boys off you," MacCready smirked.

"Oh yeah right, he did that himself," she shook her head at the memory. "I've only been kissed by two boys, and both got beat up afterwards. That ended anyone's interest in my pretty quick." She sighed at the memory and then looked at MacCready who chuckled.

"Sounds like you have a pretty great brother."

"Yeah," she smiled and folded her arms over her chest in thought. "I had to spread a rumor about him having a penis the size of a squire's pinky as payback."

MacCready's eyes snapped wide and he breathed in shock. "Wow, that's pretty… mean."

She shrugged. "You should have seen the cluster of women at Knight-Captain Cade's med-bay. Of course he couldn't confirm nor deny it, so they believed it," she laughed a little at the memory.

"Well, your brother must be pretty important for a group of women to care that much." His smile told her he was only mildly interested, probably because it was to do with her, not so much the Brotherhood aspect of it.

The question put her on edge though, and she suddenly regretted bringing it up. "Yeah, he's pretty high ranking," she tried to act like it was nothing and gave a casual shrug, but her nervousness caught his attention and he raised an eyebrow at her.

He opened his mouth but the barber called out, "Who's next? Who needs a hair cut? Oh, deary, you do, come here, sweet cheeks."

Madelyn looked at the woman and then stepped up. "I need trim, but I don't know what I want other than that."

"Oh, deary, I just got these new colors in," the woman spun around and picked up a bunch of dyes. "I can blend this right into what you have, don't even have to bleach it, my son cooked it up," she explained but Madelyn just sort of stared.

"I can't have unnatural hair color," she frowned, her eyes fixating on the green dye in the woman's hand.

"What kind of bullshit is that?" the woman frowned.

"I'm in the Brotherhood of Steel," Madelyn explained and the woman continued to stare as if that wasn't enough of an explanation. "It's against regulation."

"Well, I see you looking at that green and green is a natural color," she said and dropped the other colors onto a counter. "Them Brotherhood types don't know who they're dealing with. You tell them, Lady Penelope, Dyer of Hair, Cutter of Strands, Reaper of Split Ends, Cleanser of Grease, the Beautifier, Queen of Style and Sass says they can kiss my ass."

Madelyn stared at the woman in surprise and then looked at MacCready who was grinning widely. She mouthed for him to help her and he shook his head. "Oh, MacCready, you're a site for sore eyes," Lady Penelope smiled, realizing who he was now as she started to brush out Madelyn's hair. "How's that boy of yours?"

"He's great, maybe I'll bring him by and you can give him a hair cut. He liked that red dye to put in his hair last time," MacCready leaned against a nearby pole and watched Madelyn's hair soften under the taming bristles

"You getting a hair cut too?"

"Oh no," he shook his head. Lady Penelope stepped around Madelyn and snatched his hat off his head and dropped it into the Squire's lap. Her fingers ran through the man's hair roughly.

"Bullshit you're not. I'm taking care of that before you leave, it's a mole rat's nest." She returned to Madelyn who was now smiling up at him, holding his hat.

"I'm not going to get that back, will I?"

"Probably not," Madelyn smiled and looked at it while Penelope whipped out a pair of scissors. It was unique, like the dusters he wore.

She could feel her hair being cut, but she didn't pay it any mind, instead she just closed her eyes and relaxed, letting her legs rest for the first time that day. Lady Penelope moved her head as need and made comments about her pretty round face and asked about doing some styles once her hair had been dyed and dried with a towel. Madelyn shrugged, "Honestly, you can do whatever, I'll probably just wear a hat if I don't like it. No offense."

"No one has left my shop unhappy."

"Then I trust you," she smiled and the woman paused. When she opened her eyes she saw Lady Penelope staring with a smile herself.

"MacCready you got yourself a beautiful one right here," the woman said over her shoulder. The sniper was looking off at the crowd, and seemed surprised by the statement.

"Yeah, she is, isn't she?" MacCready breathed, his eyes now looking at Madelyn. She wondered what the woman had done to her hair to make his expression turn toward that level of awe.

"Well now I'm curious," she tried to look up again but she couldn't see any of her own hair.

"Wait, let me style it, then I'll show you, deary." Lady Penelope took her brush and had Madelyn's hair up and styled in moments with skilled fingers. It felt nice to have someone wash and brush her hair for her. It was like a head massage. "There we go."

"Okay, I think I'm ready to look at this."

The mirror was put into her hand and she took a breath before looking. "Oh," she watched herself say, but it didn't look like her. The green looked amazing, it went well with her freckle dotted skin, and the style that Lady Penelope put it up in made Madelyn's round face look longer, and thinned it. She let out a slow breath and stared into her grey eyes that now looked blue with the new hair. "That's so… cool," she smiled and stood up, throwing her arms around the barber.

"I told you, deary, no one leaves unhappy."

"Looks like it's my turn. We better hurry if we're going to get you something to wear before meeting Nate. I'm sure he's wondering where we are." MacCready stepped around them and sat down in the chair. "I'm paying for both of us, by the way, Pen."

"Like a good gentleman," she nodded and he handed her a handful of caps. She looked at it and nodded. "Thank you. Do you want the usual?"

"Always."

Madelyn watched as she trimmed up the sniper's hair taking it back down how it had probably looked a month or so ago. She didn't realize she was staring until MacCready smirked at her and she looked away. "I'm going to go back to the armor shop on that corner," she pointed and dropped his hat into his lap.

"I'll be there in a moment," he promised and she nodded.

Once she was away from him she felt her breath steady. Man, things were getting so… weird between them. They needed to talk about this, she couldn't just keep thinking about it. Sure he'd kissed her, but it might not mean the same thing to her. He'd seemed surprised at her saying she'd been waiting for it. _She_ was surprised she had said that. Since when had she wanted that? How long has she wanted it? And after a moment of thought she nodded to herself. She wanted more than just a forehead kiss. She wanted a real kiss.

Oh my, she thought to herself, the image of him sweeping her up into a kiss taking her breath away. Was this moving too fast? Was there really a standard? It was the wasteland. You moved as fast as you felt comfortable, and she was comfortable with him. Madelyn smiled and felt her cheeks pick up some color. She would have to get him alone later and see what his thoughts were.

"Hi, I'm back," she smiled at the clothing trader. She was an older woman, heavy around the torso with a small head and friendly smile.

"Oh, hey there, child," she cooed and straightened something on a shelf. "Did you change your mind on something?"

"I actually wanted to try on that pair of cargo pants you have," she pointed it out and the woman nodded.

Madelyn picked out some other pieces to complete the outfit. It was nice, she thought as she looked in the full body mirror. Cargo pants tucked into combat boots, a black tank top and braces on her upper arms and thighs for some protection. She watched as she twisted in her reflection, looking to see if the clothes would ride up anywhere or expose her skin in a way she wouldn't like. But it fit nicely. "Damn," she whispered to herself and smiled. Now she just wanted a hat, as much as she loved the hair, she liked the idea of a cap too much. "Excuse me, do you have a–"

Madelyn paused when she saw MacCready standing with his back against the wall, talking to the saleswoman. "Oh, child, I knew that would look great on you."

"Thank you," Madelyn said and looked down at herself. She could actually see her stomach for its size instead of it lost in the folds of her clothes. "This fits me so much better, I think I'll find travel easier, too," she smiled at the woman thankfully. "Do you have any hats?"

MacCready was still staring. She tried to ignore it, enjoying the feeling of his eyes locked on her. She had to admit, part of why she liked this outfit so much was that she thought she looked pretty cute in it. "That's not fair," she heard him say, suddenly.

She looked at him, confused, "What?"

He shook his head, the smile on his face telling her he wasn't mad. "You know exactly what." She did. She felt her cheeks redden and she looked away, focusing on the hats the woman offered her.

"Oh," she picked up a black one. She pulled the tail of her hair through the back of it and rested it on the poof of her hair so that it wasn't crushing the work that Lady Penelope did, but rather, accented it. "What do you think?"

"You know what I think," MacCready breathed, passing her and then asked the saleswoman how much it all cost.

"I can pay for it," Madelyn protested, touching his arm.

"One hundred and twenty caps," the woman smiled and Madelyn watched MacCready take out the caps. She frowned, knowing she didn't have the full amount without what he had intended on giving her for her birthday. "Thank you, you two have a great day."

"Thanks, you too, Ma'am."

"Thank you," Madelyn smiled and followed MacCready out.

"How do the clothes fit?" he asked as they headed back toward the front of the settlement.

"Really well, better than my squire's uniform," she said, looking down at the clothes. The others were too warm for the season. The days were hot and she needed something that would allow her to breathe.

"That's good, it looks great on you, Madelyn," he said, his voice sounding off. She looked at him and noticed he wasn't looking at her. She wondered if she'd done something wrong. Was she trying too hard? Her cheeks flushed and she looked back down at herself.

"I'll pay you the caps back," she said, looking for something else to talk about.

He frowned at her. "No, you didn't take the caps for your birthday, so I bought that for you."

"I thought the smile and laugh were my gifts?"

"That was more of a gift for me," he smiled. She hadn't expected that and fought the grin that pulled on her lips. "Ah, there we go, there's another." She flushed and smiled, unable to say anything. MacCready's arm wrapped around her shoulder and he pulled her into his side as they walked down the wide main street. "Do you know what you want to eat?"

"Um, not really, I'm still not used to having choices," she glanced up at him. He was warm to lean against, and the hand on her shoulder felt nice. She liked this.

"They don't have options on the Prydwen?"

"Well, they do, but not everything's good. And when I squired I just ate whatever my knight or paladin would eat." She shrugged.

"Nate's a bit different than other soldiers isn't he?"

"You have no idea," she breathed and looked up at the bar. It had to be about three hours passed midday. The open sign was flashing, and already she could see people inside. "This looks nice," she said as they stepped inside. It was dim, and had a long corner bar with stools and a few booths against a wall, a jukebox, couches, a dance floor, and a second story above the dance floor where people could be seen sitting around talking.

"Bond keeps the place real nice," MacCready's arm fell from her shoulder to the small of her back to urge her forward.

"I can see that," she breathed and looked around as she was guided to a booth with a very familiar man sitting so that he was facing the entrance. She was about to slide into the booth across from him, but Nate stood, allowing her in on his side. She didn't miss the soft glare he was giving MacCready.

"You look great, Maddy," he said and she smiled. When he looked at her his gaze softened. He had taken his hat off and his sunglasses hung on the back of his neck where they normally did.

"Thanks, Sentinel," she grinned.

"Is that… green?" he cocked his head to the side and perked a brow.

"It is, yes," she flushed, looking away from him.

"Well, I don't know how Elder Maxson will feel about that, but it looks nice."

She let out a snorted laugh, "Arthur would flip his–" she stopped herself realizing both men were gaping at her then. She swallowed, staring back at them like a radstag in the crosshairs.


	13. Well I Like You

**Split point of view on this one, switches from Nate back to Maddy, didn't want anyone to get confused.**

* * *

Madelyn's snort laugh had been shocking enough, but her words were what really caught Nate off guard. "Arthur would flip his–" she stopped and her eyes flickered between him and R.J. as they sat in the booth stunned into stares. She swallowed and then cleared her throat. "I mean, Elder Maxson…."

"On a first name basis with your Elder?" MacCready raised an eyebrow, trying to be playful, but Nate saw something else in his eyes. Jealousy? Confusion?

Madelyn couldn't meet their gazes and she gave a shrug. "He and I are… kinda close, I mean, he's the one that saved me from the slavers."

Nate remembered her mentioning that now. It made since that they would probably refer to one another by their first names when speaking to each other, but this was the first time she'd mentioned him in such a casual way, like she knew him personally not just professionally. "How close are you?" R.J. asked, looking a little too curious for Nate's liking.

"Heya there, General," Bond's deep voice broke in and the three of them looked up at the barkeeper. Lawrence Bond was a big guy, bigger than Nate even. But he had to be, as he'd been running bars since he was sixteen and sometimes he had to show a big guy –or five– what happens if you fucked with his place. He had hair like chocolate, always clean and worn brushed back from his face, and cut close on the sides, letting the top grow long and wild. His jaw was hidden behind a very Maxson like beard that was a few shades lighter than the hair on his head with a slightly redder tint to it. With pale green eyes and a lady-killer smile, the man was the most charismatic bartender that Nate had met, pre and post war. "What can I get'cha?"

"I'll just have a water and whatever you have that's fresh," Nate said, and glanced down at Madelyn who was staring at the tattoos that lined the bartender's arms. "She'll have a glass of wine and a deathclaw steak."

"Whoa, I wanted the steak," MacCready playfully protested and then smirked. "I'll have an iguana soup actually, thanks, Bond. Oh, and a Nuka Cherry."

"Nah problem, Mac," he smiled, rubbing his hands together, without writing down their order. "Have a birthday recent?" Lawrence nodded to Madelyn.

"How'd you know?" she asked, perking an eyebrow.

"Nate don't get steak unless it's special," he said simply and then shot her a wink. "I'll get'cha drinks out to ya soon and throw yer meat on the grill, how'd ya want the steak cooked, love?"

Nate glanced at Madelyn whose cheeks were flushed. "Oh, I don't know."

"Give it to her with a little blood."

"Mid-rare then, got'cha," he smiled at Maddy before heading off.

"He's… nice," she whispered with a ghost grin on her lips.

"Probably has a dick the size of a squire's pinky," MacCready huffed and looked at Madelyn who giggled. Nate realized he was missing something.

The squire took in a slow breath and played with the saltshaker on the table. Suddenly Nate felt like a third wheel. MacCready was cleaning the underside of his fingernails, and conversation had just died. "So, what's happening between you two?"

Nate watched their reactions and couldn't help but smile crookedly. Madelyn's eyes snapped wide and flickered to R.J. before returning to him, and MacCready choked on the breath he'd just taken. "What do you mean?"

"I mean I feel like I'm chaperoning a date and you two wish I was gone." MacCready rubbed his forehead and avoided looking at Nate. Maddy just kind of stared at him, unable to decide on what to say.

Finally she breathed, "I don't know, nothing I guess."

That caught MacCready's attention and he frowned. "Nothing?"

"What?" she looked at him, raising an eyebrow.

"I thought we may have had something going," he shifted uncomfortable, removing his hat and twisting it in his hand.

Madelyn's face turned bright red and she looked at Nate who was watching them like a sitcom. "Well, I… I just–didn't realize what exactly was happening…. There hasn't been much communication on the subject," she breathed, trying to look at the ex-gunner, but her gaze kept returning to Nate to gage his reaction.

"Well, for the record, I like you." R.J. sat up straight and locked a stare on her.

"Oh," her breath left her. Nate's attention jumped back and forth, waiting to see what would happen next. Part of him wanted them to just kiss, and the other part wanted to hit MacCready for making a move on his little girl.

"Here're yer drinks," Bond dropped them onto the table and split them up, sliding them to the person they belonged to. "I'lla get yer meat on the grill. Be back," and he was gone.

Madelyn used the distraction and to take a sip of her wine. Nate and MacCready were still waiting, though, watching the squire as she tried her best to avoid them. Finally she sighed. "I like you too," she said without looking away from the red liquid.

"So, R.J., what're your intentions with my little girl?" Nate asked, raising an eyebrow. The sniper stared in surprise.

"Really, Nate?"

"Yup."

"You know me," his eyes narrowed slightly, like he was trying to tell if Nate was going to laugh and expose this as a joke.

"I do, fairly well," the general agreed.

"I wouldn't do anything she didn't want to, I'm not that kind of guy." He frowned, looking offended. Nate also frowned. Why was he being like this? He and MacCready were good enough friends; he was better than a lot of scum in the Commonwealth.

"I just have to make sure."

"Um, Sentinel," Madelyn whispered, and Nate glanced at her.

"Yes?"

"Not… to uh, undermined you at all, but you aren't really my dad, and there for you don't really have the authority to determine my love-life." She looked very uncomfortable and Nate realized what he'd done. He had already mentally made her family, but she wasn't ready for that just yet. "Your opinion means a lot to me, sir, but… I don't really need your approval."

He cleared his throat and even MacCready looked surprised. "Damn," the ex-mercenary breathed and took a quick drink. Nate nodded his agreement.

"I'm so sorry, Sentinel," she immediately regretted her words and Nate shook his head, resting a hand on her shoulder.

"It's fine, really, Maddy, I over stepped. I forget that you're my squire, not my daughter, it's okay," he stood up then and her eyes widened. "You two have fun, I'll be at the bar if you need me."

"Nate," she frowned, reaching for him but he took his drink and departed.

At the bar he was able to see Bond right outside at his large grill cooking more meat than one man should be able to keep track of. With a sigh, Nate left his drink and rounded the bar, headed back to help him.

"Heya, there, gen'," the man smiled and Nate grinned back, forcing himself to lighten up. "Couldn't resist the smell, eh?"

"Got booted by the love birds," Nate shrugged. "Want any help?"

"Yah, grab a plate," Bond gestured and Nate did, holding it for the barkeeper.

"You should really hire more help."

"Had a pretty little thang to help, but she done run off with a provisioner," he sighed and then smirked at Nate. "When you gonna move out her' anyway?"

"Maybe after I retire, but I don't know about living here, might just buy a place and spend a few days out here at a time, this is a bit… busier than I like my home to be."

"I'd hire ya quick if ya stuck around," Bond tried, smiling to show Nate his straight teeth. Odd thing, having all of them and them being straight, hard to come by nowadays.

"Yeah, you might just convince me at this rate," Nate took the plate inside while Bond flipped the other meats and took a couple more off.

"Mirelurk goes to the lady in the corner couch," Bond nodded, plating the meat with some vegetables from a pot on his stove. "Mongrel to the man upstairs in the funny hat, and I'lla get yer girl and Mac." Nate nodded and took the plates off.

* * *

Surprisingly, silence fell between MacCready and Madelyn when Nate departed. Part of it was probably her fault, as she was watching him help the bartender.

"So you like me?"

Madelyn should have seen that coming. "Well, you started it."

"And how did I do that?"

"Well, you shot me," she looked at the scar on her arm.

"You know I would never hurt you on purpose, right?" His eyebrows pulled together, forming a pucker between them. The ex-mercenary had lines creasing his face from squinting, glaring, and frowning, but they didn't take away from his youth.

"I'm not afraid of that," she promised him. He nodded and then tilted his head to the side.

"What are your afraid of?"

"I guess… I've never liked anyone, not really–not like this. And no one has ever wanted any kind of relationship out of me, so I don't know what… I don't know how…" she frowned, looking at her hands resting on the table.

His fingers drifted in, traced hers gently. "Don't worry about anything. You're taking the lead on this, we won't do _anything_ you don't want to." That put her at ease.

"But don't you want something out of this?" She didn't know what it was, but she had a pretty good idea it was what every guy wanted.

"Since I lost Lucy I've been… alone, a lot," he frowned, seeming to force himself to look at her. "Nate was the first person I could really trust here in the Commonwealth, and I found out just how much I missed having someone I could relax my guard with." She remembered how he had been at Hangman's Ally, sleeping so lightly that removing his gun startled him awake, but he had slept so deeply at Sanctuary.

"I have always been able to trust people, at least," she frowned a little in thought, "At least since the Brotherhood saved me, I've never been without security." He leaned away and withdrew his touch. She'd broken the moment by bringing up the Brotherhood. "I can't even mention them without you getting upset?"

He didn't seem to notice. "I just don't see what's so great about them," he decided after a moment.

"They saved me, MacCready," she leaned forward, looking into his face. "Without them I would still be in the Capital Wasteland, dead or a slave. They not only gave me a new life, they gave me a family."

"And they brainwashed you into thinking that anything that doesn't have smooth skin and is born from a human woman is an abomination," he added.

Madelyn frowned. "Yeah, Dogmeat's at the top of my hit list, after that, every radstag in this God forsaken Commonwealth." There was just a little too much bitterness in her response for it to be as funny as she'd intended. He didn't think it was funny either.

"You know what I meant."

"And you know as well as I that the Brotherhood is only here to protect."

"No, I'm afraid I don't know that," he frowned, his arms crossing his chest as he straightened up in the booth.

"We're here to destroy super mutants, like the ones that attacked us at Hangman's Ally, and the feral ghouls that plague the waste," she explained, leaning into her argument.

"Just the feral ghouls? That's why you have non ferals in your ranks, right?" he lifted a brow at her. His rhetorical question made her more angry than she cared to admit. "Oh, that's fine, at least they let people like Hancock onto the–oh, wait." His voice had picked up an edge that cut her deep. She didn't know what to say to that, and MacCready knew it. "Yeah, I get the whole super mutant thing, and trust me, I hate ferals just as much as the Brotherhood does, but I know the difference between people and monsters. Humans can be monsters too." The crunch of his nose and disgust in his lip pained her more than his words. He was looking her over as if he was wondering what he'd even seen in her. "Don't pretend like you believe in everything that they tell you, not anymore at least. Your Elder would kill Hancock without hesitation if they were brought into the same room, and I know that you would be hurt if something were to happen to that ghoul." She had to look away from him. How had this happened? They were having a moment and now he was making her doubt her beliefs. Her jaw tightened and she grabbed her wine, wanting a drink. "I'm a synth, Madelyn," MacCready said suddenly.

The wine in her mouth choked her as she gasped and dropped the glass. He stared at her and she felt a burning behind her eyes. "What? I don't believe you," she said, her eyes narrow. He was just trying to get a rise out of her, to prove a point.

"I am. My designation is R3-53." He was staring right at her, holding her eyes. She felt her heart break into a sprint and her breathing spike.

"I don't…"

"I escaped the Institute long before Nate woke up from cryo sleep. I was saved by the Railroad, and they gave me new memories to help me survive in the Capital Wasteland where I lived, met Lucy, had Duncan, and now I'm here."

"But you… Little Lamplight?"

"Never lived there, they just supplied me with the memories." Madelyn was shaking her head. He had to be lying: there was no way.

"I don't believe you, MacCready."

"Why?"

"You're real. There's no way you're a synth, I've seen you… be human."

"And you think Nate just magically noticed Danse had not acting human? Synths are… people. How ever they came about, the ones who believe and feel are just as human as you." MacCready relaxed some, his face twisting into a sort of pain.

"You're not a synth."

"Can you still care about me if I am?"

"I don't know." Madelyn looked at the glass in her hand. She felt sick. How could he be a synth? He had a _son._ Could synths even do that? She hadn't heard of that. But if they were as good as human then they could…. They did sweat, and breathe, produce saliva, and other bodily functions, so it wouldn't be that far off to produce sperm and eggs for reproducing.

MacCready was watching her face as she thought. "You okay?"

She looked at him. "You escaped the Institute? Then you shouldn't be a threat, since you've severed your ties with them," she said softly, it seemed like she was saying it to herself. "It would take me time, but…"

"You would still be willing to be in a relationship with me?" he raised an eyebrow at her, surprised.

"Well, for some reason you hate the Brotherhood and you're still here talking to me like you want to be with me, so I guess the least I can do is the same."

"I'm not a synth, Maddy," he said and she felt her breath leave her in relief. "I'm surprised, though, I thought that would be a deal breaker for you."

"So you're trying to break up with me?" she asked raising an eyebrow.

He smiled, "No, I just wanted to see your reaction. If you're willing to stay with me if I'm an 'abomination' then I shouldn't have to worry about anything else, right? And it shows you your feelings." He was right. She wouldn't have guessed being a synth wouldn't upset her more. How could she be so devoted to the Brotherhood and not have more of their ideals? She knew the words, but she didn't feel them in her heart.

"I still believe in them." Madelyn held her wine tight, the liquid had spilled and stained the table and made her fingers sticky, but she wasn't thinking about that.

"That's fine, as long as you don't go nuts and start preaching like one of them, I think I can forgive that side of you."

"I can see you making a good knight," she said suddenly and he raised an eyebrow at her. "We could really use some snipers, we don't have many."

"With those suits I just thought you charged in and ran over your enemies."

"We do, but sometimes you need the delicate touch of a headshot from a hundred yards away." He smiled at that, looking away from her. "You look like I just said something dirty."

"You have no idea," he sighed and placed his arms back onto the table.

"If we're going to make this work, we have to talk," she said and he nodded, meeting her gaze.

"I agree."

"I'm not leaving the Brotherhood, and I would love for you to join, but I'm not expecting that of you."

"Good, because I'm not."

She nodded. "But if you'd be okay with at least visiting the Prydwen and maybe coming with on missions that I'll get assigned when I'm promoted to Knight, I would be grateful."

"They would let a civilian on missions?"

"Can't stop you from happening to be there to help," Madelyn shrugged and he smiled a little.

"Yeah, I'll come with you when I can, Maddy."

"That makes me happy, MacCready," she smiled.

"Please, don't call me that, _Nate_ doesn't even call me that." His hands slid across the table and took hold of hers.

A smirk pulled the corner of her lip up, "You just don't look like a Robert to me."

"Oh, I see, know many Roberts do you?" he asked, a brow perked.

"Well, you'd be surprised."

* * *

 **Sorry for this one being short, I swear the plot is kicking in, I just wanted to set things up. I have the horrible habit of diving into this kind of stuff for the long haul, but I do know what I'm doing, I promise. /shyly runs back to laptop to keep typing/**


	14. Revelation

_"_ _Nate…?"_

 _Nora's voice had a touch of concern that he wasn't expecting to hear at three in the morning. Without hesitating, Nate leapt out of the bare mattress and rounded the corner into the bathroom where the door sat wide open. "What is it?"_

 _"_ _Can… you turn the light on?"_

 _Nora was holding something in the darkness of the bathroom and Nate's eyes hadn't adjusted to the lack of light to be able to see what it was. When he turned the light on, there was a moment of blindness, then he saw the little stick. His heart paused and he looked at her face. "When… did you get that?"_

 _"_ _Well… I haven't had my period in two months…" she looked up at him and offered the little while stick. He swallowed and stepped forward to take it from her gently._

 _The little blue plus made his knees feel weak. "We're…"_

 _"_ _We're pregnant," she finished._

 _"_ _You're going to be a mom."_

 _"_ _And you're going to be a daddy," she smiled, showing teeth with hope wide it went, scrunching her eyes. Tears spilled onto her cheeks and she touched her stomach._

 _"_ _Oh, Nora," he knelt down and kissed her._

 _"_ _Nate, stop, I'm using the bathroom."_

 _"_ _I don't care if I kiss you while you shit, you're my wife," he said around her mouth and she pushed him away, laughing._

 _"_ _Weirdo."_

 _"_ _Your weirdo."_

 _"_ _Yeah," she smiled up at him when he stood up and looked at the little stick again. "I don't think I'm going to be able to go back to sleep."_

 _"_ _Me either," he shook his head and leaned against the sink, unable to see anything but the little blue plus._

 _"_ _We've never really talked about names," she said as she finished up and stood, dropping the lid and flushing._

 _"_ _Anything, hell, Grognak, I don't care," he looked at her with a smile. "I'm… I'm going to be a dad."_

 _She smiled again and kissed his cheek before reaching around him to hug him and wash her hands behind him. She rested her head on his chest and took in a slow breath. "Not Grognak. I like… Katina."_

 _"_ _I do too. Katina Walker."_

 _"_ _Yeah, after my grandmother," she nodded against his chest and used the back of his shirt to dry her hands. His arms rested on her shoulders so he could continue to stare at that magical little stick._

 _"_ _What if it's a boy?"_

 _"_ _Well, not Walter," she frowned, then giggled._

 _"_ _Walter Walker is quite distasteful," he agreed. "I'm sure you grandfather will understand."_

 _"_ _What about… Jacob?"_

 _Nate stiffened. "Why?"_

 _"_ _Well… your grandfather…"_

 _He sighed and looked into the dark hallway. "I don't want to name him that."_

 _"_ _Okay, okay," she straightened up, leaning away from him. "We'll think of something, we have… seven months?"_

 _He nodded and kissed her forehead._

 _Over the next couple months they ran down every name they knew, but something always came up._

 _"_ _Jackson."_

 _"_ _Knew one, turned out to be a serial killer…."_

 _"_ _Caleb."_

 _"_ _Knew ten, all of them were jackasses."_

 _"_ _Mathew."_

 _"_ _Sounds like a sneeze."_

 _"_ _Gabriel."_

 _"_ _My cousin's name."_

 _"_ _Porter."_

 _"_ _Hah, sounds like an asshole's name, no way."_

 _"_ _Michael."_

 _"_ _I've known too many."_

 _"_ _Zachary."_

 _"_ _Also too many."_

 _"_ _Henry."_

 _"_ _Don't like it."_

 _"_ _George."_

 _"_ _Also. Don't like it."_

 _Finally they were sitting in the hospital after ten hours of labor. Nate paced, unable to do anything as Nora had told him to leave her in a fit of anger. Her mother had told him his place was the hall, and he said over his dead body, and Nora was_ not _having that. So here he was: in the hall, with Shaun, Nora's father._

 _"_ _Don't worry, birth is a woman's job, they've been doing it since the beginning," Shaun said, resting his hand on Nate's shoulder as comfort._

 _"_ _I know, I just…" Nate folded his arms across his chest and looked at his father-in-law. Since they'd told them about the baby Shaun had finally wanted to spend time between him and Nate alone. And to both of their surprise they enjoyed it. Shooting, fixing cars, building things. Hell, if they weren't related by marriage, they probably would have become friends anyway._

 _"_ _I know, Beth wouldn't let me anywhere near the birthing room when we had Nora," he shook his head. "Luke, either."_

 _Nate nodded, "She's the reason I'm not in there." He frowned and looked at the door._

 _"_ _I know," he squeezed his shoulder. "You two ever decide on a name?"_

 _"_ _She wanted to, but we could never… find the perfect one."_

 _He nodded and shrugged. "Make one perfect, make something up, the kid won't care, not if you teach them not to. Hell, that's what people used to do, right? Just make up sounds or throw words together. How else do you get names like Johnfield and Wolfgang?"_

 _Nate smiled a little. "Nora wanted something with meaning."_

 _"_ _Did you have any in mind?"_

 _"_ _She's set on Nathaniel, it seems like now, but I don't think we need two Nathaniel James Walkers, in the world," he frowned._

 _"_ _Why not James?"_

 _Nate tilted his head in thought. "I don't know, I've never… I just…. Be weird, I think," Nate rolled his shoulders._

 _"_ _Well, could always to Nathan. Still close, but no cigar."_

 _"_ _Oh, God, please no," Nate shook his head._

 _"_ _Okay, okay," Shaun lifted his hands in surrender._

 _Nate sighed and tried to look through the window into the birthing room and rested his forehead against the glass. "What about… Shaun… Vincent… Walker?"_

 _There was a soft intake of breath behind him and Nate looked back at his father-in-law. His face was covered with shock. "You… don't have to do that, Nate."_

 _Nate grinned a little. "Nah, I think I like it. Shaun Vincent Walker sounds real nice," now he rested his hand on the older man's shoulder._

 _With a thick gulp of emotion Nora's father looked away, trying to retain the strength he was famous for. "Nora won't have it," he tried._

 _"_ _I think she'll love it, grandpa," Nate smiled. And they could hear the screams of a new baby coming into the world on the other side of the door._

* * *

Nate woke up and rubbed his forehead. Out of habit he reached sideways for Hancock, but hit a wall. Oh yeah, small bed, not home, Bond's bar. He sighed and swung his feet over the side and sat up.

"Ther' ya are," Bond called from somewhere. Nate hadn't opened his eyes yet.

"Yup, right here," Nate waved a hand and then rubbed his face to get the sleep out of it. "What time is it?"

"Ten."

"Shit." Nate opened his eyes and looked around. The bar would be opening in half an hour and he needed to get R.J. and Maddy. Oh, he wondered where they were, and what they'd been doing.

He hadn't seen them since they left after eating last night. They walked close, but not touching, which comforted him some. Ugh, he couldn't care about that. She'd basically laid down the law last night. Nate's opinion mattered, but he didn't have any say. Even if he hated MacCready, she could still do what she wanted with him. He flinched at the idea, but MacCready was a good man. He wouldn't do anything to hurt her. A smile flickered across his face. Well, not on purpose. He hoped she gave him shit for shooting her. He needs someone close to him to give him a hard time. He got off too easy around Sanctuary.

"Bond, you know where my birds went?"

"Ah, yah, they be over at tha bunkhouse."

"Thanks, man."

"Nah problem," Bond grabbed a bottle and tossed it to Nate across the bar when the General stood. "One for the road, free per-usual."

"I can pay," Nate objected.

"I just keep 'xpectin' help when yer in town."

"Can do," Nate promised and left the bar.

Nate loved Starlight before the war. He would bring Nora all the time, even before they moved to Sanctuary. It had been their official first date, and the first place they went out to as a married couple. He hoped what he'd helped to do here she would be proud of. He felt bad that he funneled so many supplies from other settlements here, but Sanctuary held bad memories as well as good ones. Starlight… Starlight was just his happy place, and that meant it got his favoritism. It really wasn't fair, but he didn't completely neglect the other settlements, they just… had more freedom. Starlight was almost restricted in what they could do because he wouldn't let them bring down the screen for parts or change the concession stand.

The bunkhouse was the second tallest structure because it was a tri-leveled clubhouse with three more stories of beds above that. Starlight got a lot of traffic at the right time of year, so it had made sense to build it the way they had. It also had the highest amount of homeless even within the walls of any other settlement. The bunkhouse was a cap-a-night lodging, per Nate's instructions to keep _some_ flow of caps, but also to allow the capless to be able to have an actual bed to sleep in. It kept people off the streets, and even if they weren't able to get jobs, most people could scavenge enough scrap to sell for at least one cap.

When Nate entered the woman behind the counter gasped and ran to him. " _OH NATE!_ " He caught her when she jumped into him and started kissing his cheeks, leaving behind red lipstick.

"Oh, hey there, Lindsey," he said awkwardly and shifted away from her when he sat her back on her feet.

"Forever an awkward mole rat," she commented. He shook his head with a smile.

"No, I'm just… not used to people kissing me," he wiped at his face.

"Other than that ghoul of yours, right?" she taunted, lifting a skinny blond brow.

"Yeah, just him," Nate agreed and gestured to the stairs. "Have you seen MacCready and a girl with him?"

"Hmm," she feigned innocence as she looked away from him, up at the lofts overlooking the dance floor. Her slender finger tapped her chin. "I don't know for sure…"

"I find that hard to believe, Lindsey, since you know everything about anyone."

"Oh, you flirt," she waved a hand at him and rolled her eyes. "Fine, yes, I saw them, they paid for two beds, boring," she added with a frown. He smirked at her and touched her shoulder.

"Thanks, Lindsey."

"How many times do I have to tell you, you need to start calling me Li," she protested.

"I thought only your lovers called you that," he raised an eyebrow at her while he walked toward the stairs.

"Well, you could always be one of those."

"Nope, sorry," he waved to her and ascended the stairs.

"Fifth level," she called and sighed before returning to her work.

Four flights of stairs later and Nate was looked at a dimly lit room of beds line in neat rows. It only took him a moment to find Maddy and R.J. as the squire was standing up and stretching. So as not to wake the other people, Nate walked over to them before saying anything.

"Morning," he greeted her and she smiled at him, looking well rested.

"Morning, Sentinel," she gave him a playful salute. She was in a good mood.

He smirked and looked at MacCready who was sprawled out on the small bed, a leg and the opposite arm hanging off. "He's talented isn't he?"

"Yeah," she giggled and bent down next to him and ran a hand through his hair.

"I heard that," the ex-mercenary sighed. "And thank you, Nate."

"I didn't mean for it to be a compliment."

"All well," he shrugged and squinted up to see who was touching him. "Ah, was worried Natie was getting touchy."

"Never in your life, R.J."

"Oh, well, there was that one time," he sighed as he started getting up. "You were all 'Oh… R.J…. it's _so cold_ , we should huddle for warmth," the lean man stood up and grabbed a boot while he changed his voice as if to try to sound like Nate.

"When was this?" Nate raised an eyebrow.

"I believe right outside of the Glowing Sea, before we gave that scientist that damn serum," he grunted and pulled on his boot roughly.

Madelyn looked up at Nate then, her face twisted in confusion. "Virgil? I thought you killed him, I was there when you told Kells he wasn't a threat anymore."

Nate looked at her and remembered, yeah, there had been a squire in the room hadn't there? Well, this was awkward. "I… uh, lied."

Her eyes snapped wide. "You… lied to Lancer-Captain Kells?"

Nate swallowed and looked at R.J. who had stopped mid-pull on his second boot, watching the two of them to see how this was going to go down. "I got him a cure, he'd no longer a super mutant. And he's not a _threat_ , so I didn't really _lie_."

"But he worked for the _Institute_!" Madelyn stared up at him, her arms flailing.

"Work _ed_ ," Nate pointed out.

" _Work_ ed," Madelyn countered.

"Maddy, he left them, he isn't a threat. Come on," he frowned at her, hurt. "You don't trust my judgment?"

She flinched and frowned. Maybe he shouldn't have pulled that card, but she nodded, looking at the ground. "Yeah… I guess…" she sighed.

"On another note, Nate totally tried to cuddle me in my sleep that night," MacCready cut back in, finishing with his boot.

"I swear I don't remember this."

"All that matters is that it happened," R.J. stretched and bent side to side.

"Doesn't sound like you objected too much to it," Madelyn offered, lifting a brow at the ex-gunner.

He chuckled. "Trust me, I resisted, but he's quite…" R.J. looked at Nate dramatically, "Convincing."

Nate tried to remember the night in question. It had been cold, but they'd built a fire. Hancock had returned to Goodneighbor after hearing about a Super Mutant attack, and R.J. had offered to company Nate until they got the mayor back. The trip south had been nice enough with the two of them, two quiet snipers made decent company with each other. "Be careful there, R.J., she'll get jealous," Nate gestured to Maddy who was giving the men funny looks. As much as he liked and respected MacCready, he had never thought of him romantically, and now he was happy about that. God, that would have been uncomfortable. With a shudder he sighed, "We should get going. I told you about the lead right?"

"Yeah, about the scavenging team seeing prisoners and oddly dressed men guiding them," Maddy said as they made their way to the stairs once everything was packed.

"Yes, Hancock responded to my call, Sunshine was still up, and hadn't see anything yet, but Oberland was empty," he frowned.

"Where they attacked?" MacCready asked.

"It didn't seem like it." Nate rubbed his forehead. "I don't get this, how could two settlements went without us knowing, and in different ways."

"What about Grey Garden?" MacCready asked while he filled his magazines, preparing for anything. Nate shook his head.

"They radioed in that there was some strange groups walking around, but they haven't been attacked or had any contact."

"Grey Garden is just robots, right?" Madelyn clarified.

"Yes," Nate stopped at the door of the clubhouse, looking back at them. "It's got the same supplies and resources, though."

"So then whoever's doing this isn't doing it for the supplies," the sniper frowned, matching Nate's glared.

"They're doing it for the people."

"Oh God, what do they want with the people?" the squire looked horrified. Nate remembered her past. She was practically born into slavery, he could only imagine how she'd feel if that's what had begun to happen here in the Commonwealth.

"We can't know for sure until we find out where they're coming from, and who they are." Nate sighed, "I'm going to see if I can talk to Lana, she was with the scavenging team when they saw the prisoners, I'll see if she can help us any."

"Okay, Robert and I'll get breakfast to go while you do that," Madelyn said and Nate paused long enough to stare at her and then swallowed the chuckle that brought tears to his eyes.

"Robert?" he asked and looked at the sniper who sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Shut up, Nate."

"Sorry…"

"No you're not."

"No I'm not," the General chuckled and shook his head. "Anyway, meet me at the front gate in about half an hour."

* * *

Lana was the best damn scrapper in Starlight and made a pretty good living off of it. She lived in the shadow of the screen near the mayor, with a decent sized home decorated with the objects she found and refused to sell. Nate sat down when she told him to and took the water she offered.

"I know this isn't a social visit. It's about those dumbasses I saw outside ArcJet, isn't it?" She was a little older than Nate with hair turning grey at the sides, but she wore it well and happily in her long hair that was always pulled back from her face. Her face was scarred and creased, but not totally unpleasant, she didn't have suitors running to her door though.

"Yes, I need as much information as you can give me, unless you could…"

"Come with you?" she raised a pierced eyebrow at him and chewed on the ring in her lip. "I don't know, Nate," she sighed and sat down next to him, stirring some tea. "You seem to only come to me when you need something."

"Well, you never come to me at all," he challenged.

She pursed her lips, narrowing them at him. "I don't make it North often."

"You don't have to come, I just need to know where you think they're going, and the best description of what they look like you can manage."

"I'll do ya one better," she stood, leaving behind her tea and picked up some papers she had sitting on her table. "I drew these when I got back."

Nate took the drawings and frowned. They were amazing, very detailed, drawn in pencil to get shading and dimension. Lana was talented, but what made him frown was how _odd_ the uniforms were. And yes, they were uniforms. They looked similar to that of the Children of Atom, but they had cloaks, and armor with unique helmets. "What the hell?"

"Yeah," she sighed and waved a hand. "I've never seen anything like that. I think they make their own shit, you know, like those Rust Devils do with the robots…. I don't know, but they even walked funny, real stiff in the knees, like… like they couldn't walk right," she shrugged.

"Thank you, Lana."

"Be careful, Nate. I didn't engage them for a reason. There are a _lot_ of them," she frowned, standing up when he did. "I suggest you bring as many men as you can spare when, or if you find them."

"We'll find them, and I expect you'll be helping us."

"I think they got Abernathy farm," she admitted as Nate was leaving.

"What do you mean?" he frowned. "We heard them radio in two days ago."

"Call it a feeling," she said, gesturing into the distance. Nate turned around and could just see smoke in the Northwest.

"That's a lot of smoke to be Abernathy farm," he frowned, it was too far for it to be that visible. It had to be something else.

Lana frowned and closed the door without another word. Nate's heart pounded in his chest and he ran to the front gate to get Maddy and MacCready. They had to check on Abernathy farm.


	15. Friends, New and Old

The flames reached high in the sky. Madelyn had never seen such a fire. It had completely wiped out the farm and surrounding area, catching on everything. The massive metal structure the farm had been built under was dressed in the burning red tongues as they climbed up the moss and vines that littered the construction.

"Oh my God…" was all she could breathe as Nate dropped to his knees.

Minutemen from Sanctuary had beaten them there and tried to contain the fire, but there was nothing more they could do at this point. Madelyn rested a hand on her Sentinel's shoulder and let the empathy of his loss fill her. She hadn't even heard of this settlement, but she knew that this meant something to Nate.

"I… Blake and I were…" he shook his head. "I got him his daughter's locket back from some punk raiders. We had some beers, hell, we were almost friends. He had such a family…" Nate was shaking under her touch and Madelyn swallowed against the lump in her throat.

Nearby MacCready stood uncomfortable. He didn't know these people either, but he knew the loss was much.

"This is the third attack we know of and it's been different each time, what if they aren't linked?" Madelyn said some time later when Nate had finished talking to the Minutemen soldiers and the fire had died down to cinders. It had been lucky that the trees weren't too close. The fire had burned for most of the day, but it couldn't make it across the field to the trees once the Minutemen made it there and were able to slow it some.

"There were no bodies. Blake and his family weren't here," he frowned.

"So we have a settlement that was attacked and almost all of its residents were taken, how many people lived in Hangman's? Thirty?" MacCready asked and Nate nodded his head side to side to convey 'about'. "I found a couple dead, plus the raider, but he wasn't wearing what you said Lana drew, so he might have showed up later, looking for a place to stay." The sniper shifted, gesturing with his hand. "Then we have Oberland, which was small, only ten, right?"

"Yeah."

"And they didn't appear to have put up a fight at all," Robert narrowed his eyes. "Then we have Abernathy which is completely destroyed but no bodies."

"Only thing in common are the missing people."

"Well, the bigger the settlement, the more resistance," Madelyn offered. "And Hangman's was the first right–that we know of? They didn't know what they were doing, maybe."

"That could be," Nate nodded.

"And then Oberland was small enough that a larger group could talk them into standing down. We all know Oberland isn't exactly known for its spine," MacCready frowned and Nate sighed, nodding.

"And Blake would never back down, but that doesn't explain why they burned it." The Sentinel's eyebrows pulled together tightly.

"It could have been an accident."

"Or a punishment," Madelyn offered.

"We don't know enough," Nate decided. "I have to talk to Hancock, find out where they are…."

"No need for that, Natie, we're here," the familiar gruff voice came from behind them. Madelyn turned around and smiled at the ghoul as he tucked his shotgun into his belt. On either side of him stood Piper and Nick, looking tired and depressed.

Nate immediately went to him, taking him into a strong embrace that Hancock returned. The smaller arms strained to reach around Nate's shoulder, but he did it, pressing his face into the man's shaven neck. "Did you find anything useful?"

"I'm sure you know just as much as we do, Blue," Piper sighed, taking a light from Nick when he prepared a cigarette for himself. A… synth… smoking? Madelyn tilted her head and then looked at Nate when he spoke.

"We think they're attacking the settlements for the people. The supplies seem untouched, or at least, not what they're after."

"I agree, Grey Garden is one of the most plentiful settlements around and it hasn't been attacked yet," Nick shifted his weight, his yellow eyes darting between each of them.

"Why take people? Slaves?" Piper frowned, flicking her cigarette to relieve it of some ash.

"What they do with the people is what we need to know first," Nate decided. "Why can happen after we know if our settlers are safe."

Madelyn had a horrible feeling burning in her chest and she began to shake. She hadn't been around slavery since she'd joined the Brotherhood, but it seemed to be her trigger word. Funny, how everyone in the Brotherhood had a trigger word. She knew several people that fell into the three main categories of Brotherhood hate. Just in her group of friends each were represented. Scribe Merrin Debrie hated super mutants for stealing her family from her at a young age. Lancer-Sargent Michael Glass hated feral ghouls for killing his scribe mother on a field mission. And she knew that Knight Reagan Knight would now share Elder Maxson's bias against synths because of Paladin Danse's demise.

Oh God… did Reagan know what happened? Had word reached the Citadel? Probably not, not something like that. Maxson would contain that to need-to-know. Reagan and Maxson were pretty good friends, probably better than Madelyn and her. She wondered if he had told her personally or not.

Not only had Paladin Danse been her mentor, he'd been a love interest. Reagan planned on telling him her feelings, but he had been shipped off to the Commonwealth. When Madelyn came with the Prydwen, Reagan had made her promise to talk to him and get him to message her. That wouldn't happen now. Shit, now she had to figure out how to tell Reagan….

An arm wrapped around her shoulders, drawing her into a side. Upon looking up, Madelyn realized it was Robert. "You look upset," he commented. She hadn't realized everyone had left them and she'd been staring stupidly at the ground.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I was…" she sighed. "I was thinking about my friends from the Capital that didn't come with the Prydwen."

"Do you miss them?"

She nodded and met his gaze. "One of my friends, her name is Reagan Knight, she had feelings for Paladin Danse," she frowned.

"Oh," his lips turned down more.

"Yeah, I don't think she's been told what happened to him."

Robert took an awkward breath. "That explains a lot."

"What?" Madelyn tilted her head at him.

"Danse didn't talk much about his past around me, but one time I heard him in his sleep, say something about a Knight Knight, I thought he was just… mumbling, that wouldn't happen to be her, would it?" They started walking, following behind Nate and the others.

"Yeah," she smiled a little. "Knight Reagan Knight. She is far more badass than she sounds, I swear."

"Oh, she sounds pretty scary," he promised and then made a thoughtful expression. "I know Nate… practically loved Danse, and don't get me wrong, Danse was pretty close to him too," MacCready looked uncomfortable. "But that makes a lot of sense, because he seemed like he was always holding back on Nate. If… what happened would have gone down differently, I think Danse may have told him about your friend."

Madelyn nodded, "Yeah, Danse didn't… do feelings very well. I remember Reagan saying she was going to have to hit him in the face with a shovel to get him to notice she just hit on him." Then she frowned a little. "I don't think it helped that she ran around with Rhys so much though. I mean, I get that she's like really… sexually active –and I guess Rhys is better than just random guys every other night– but I think it may have delayed what she could have had with Danse."

"Wait, is this the same Rhys that's here in the Commonwealth?"

"Um, at Cambridge Police Station? Yeah?"

"You know someone who would sleep with that asshole?"

Madelyn's eyebrows lifted. "I mean… he's not that bad. I guess–well, you're not Brotherhood, and he just thinks all civilians are pretty…"

"Stupid?"

"That's putting it mildly…" she sighed and rubbed her forehead. "Reagan is going to _kill_ Nate if she finds out that he's the one who did it."

"Why not kill Maxson? He's the one who ordered it." The ex-mercenary rested a hand on her shoulder, looking at when they came to stop.

"She just might," Madelyn sighed. "She's kind of famous for hitting people. She was in training to be a Lancer, but she knocked her co-pilot out and landed the bird alone. Kells told her he thought her skills would be best used as a Knight. So… Lancer Knight because Knight Knight, and she punches anyone who laughs."

"I'm sure she punches a lot of people then," he smirked and Madelyn nodded, chewing on her lip.

"Yeah, you thought Rhys was an asshole? She makes him look like a pup when she's angry."

"I don't know if I want to meet this friend of yours," he said, sounding just a little uncomfortable.

"Well, you probably will eventually," Madelyn shrugged and smiled. "I can't wait to see her and Merr again, it's been… two years? More? Wow." The squire hadn't been able to keep good contact with her friends, which had added a lot of stress to her positioning on the Prydwen. Another reason she needed to graduate to Knight as soon as possible.

"You said they were still in the Capital? Why didn't they come when you did?" he raised an eyebrow at her.

Oh… shit… here it was. "Their orders were to stay," she said, but her hesitation and tone made him tilt his head, his lips pursing slightly. If only she could play things off. She didn't have to lie, just tell certain parts of the truth. That wasn't lying….

"And you got orders to come squire in the Commonwealth?"

Shit. Shit. Shit. Now it was time to lie or tell the truth. Meeting Robert's blue eyes she couldn't bring herself to lie to him. That wasn't what she wanted in this relationship anyway. "Well, not really. I'm... not supposed to be in the Commonwealth."

The confession drew a shocked expression on MacCready's face. His eyes wide and his lips parted in an o. "Then... why are you here?"

She sighed and rubbed her forehead. "It's really complicated. You know how I mentioned Maxson and I are really close?" He nodded. "He's basically my brother. He and I used to eat dinner together in his quarters and he would get me the best squiring mentors and..." she shook her head. "Make fun of me and do brotherly things. We kept it a secret mostly though because we didn't want people thinking I got special treatment. But over time he started to... hold me back."

"Hold you back?" MacCready promoted when she stopped.

"I'm the top of my class. I should be a knight. But no squire graduates before 18 no matter skill without the Elder's permission," she explained.

"And he wouldn't allow you to be promoted?"

"No," she confirmed and huffed. "When he came to the Commonwealth he gave me personal orders to stay and I wasn't supposed to, but I snuck into the Prydwen and came to prove to him I could do this. Since then I've been running constant squiring missions until I could get Kells to agree to allow me to work under the Sentinel. But that meant I had to sneak into Maxson's quarters and send Kells an email from him making it sound like an order..." she knew she was rambling. But this was the first time she'd told anyone since coming to the Commonwealth and it was so nice to finally have it out. "Kells fell for it, I couldn't believe it. But then... Nate... he's so different than I thought he would be, and it became more than me just trying to get him to convince Maxson I should be promoted."

"So you just wanted to squire Nate so he would stand up to Maxson for you?" MacCready's face showed his confusion and she felt so guilty.

"I knew he would just shoot me down if I told him myself– hell, he's already done it. He babies me. I just..." she shook her head. "I thought that if someone like the _Sentinel_ stood up to him he'd have to see it was personal feelings keeping me from reaching my full potential." Robert's jaw was tight and he looked away from her. It killed her to see him like this. "Say something, please?"

He glanced at her. "So you've been lying to Nate?"

"I didn't care as much at first but it's getting so hard now..."

Then he wrapped her up in a hug and rested his chin on her head. "Hey, it could be so much worse. Honestly I think Maxson is going to be the only one upset about all this."

"I've been dreading that day," she confessed, her cheek pressed against his chest. Madelyn played with the fabric of the green coat under the tan duster he sported.

"Yeah, he doesn't strike me as the kinda guy to be quiet when he's angry." Then MacCready's breath left him in a huff, "Oh… fu–crap."

"What is it?" she looked up at him.

"That means… he–" he cleared his throat, looking nervous. Then he shuddered, "I mean, I don't have to get along with him, do I? I don't think he'll like me too much."

Madelyn smiled at him widely, her hands on his sides as she looked up into his face. She hadn't thought of that. Yeah, Maxson had tried to give her 'the talk' but she'd noped right out of that and ended up in the medbay with Cade giving her 'the very informative talk' per Maxson's orders. This had, of course, been before she came to the Commonwealth. "I don't think he would like anyone I brought to him and said, 'Hey, Artie, this is my boyfriend.'"

"Artie?" he coughed, trying not to laugh and choked on it instead. "And what does he call you?"

Her face lit up like a warning light. "Oh, no," she shook her head, denying him. Madelyn dropped her arms and tried to step away from him.

"Oh no, now you have to tell me."

She glared to herself and looked down at the space between them, her forehead coming to rest on his sternum. "Puppy," she whispered softly.

"Oh… my God." Robert leaned his head back to look at the sky as he smiled. She huffed and shook her head against him.

"Don't, please, don't."

"Is there a story behind it?"

"Well, he saved me from a dog, so he would call me puppy-chow, and over time it got shortened. And sometimes he just calls me pup, like you do Duncan." She felt him shake with laughter.

"That's only a little awkward."

"That's why I was curious why you started calling him that." Madelyn sighed and closed her eyes. Then they snapped open with a realization she felt horrible for not having sooner. "Who's watching Duncan?" she pulled her head back to look up at MacCready.

"Oh, Sanctuary has kid-care," he said. "Mrs. Stone is in charge of it. She has several helpers. They watch the kids twenty-four/seven when their parents are out on missions or dates, or work," he added.

"Oh," Madelyn nodded, looking down.

"It makes me happy that you worry about him," he commented. "I've been worried I wouldn't be able to find someone who could love him like he needs."

"He needs a mom," she agreed. He nodded and held her face gently in his hands.

"I know that this is a lot to ask of you. You're very young," he gave her a meaningful look. "I know you're older than you thought you were, but age is how you act."

"Well, then, I'm an old lady," she smirked and he laughed leaning in and kissing her forehead.

"That's fine, I could get into the whole cougar thing for you."

"Am I supposed to be flattered by that? I don't think it worked," she sighed and he chuckled.

"Hey, you two going to join the rest of civilization?" Hancock called to them. Madelyn looked up and waved at him to show him she'd heard, then returned her attention to Robert.

He looked down at her with a smile that was hiding something, but then he took her hand and led her toward the ghoul.

* * *

 _"_ _So, you'll send him emails for me," Madelyn explained as she packed her backpack. Merrin shifted uncomfortable._

 _"_ _You mean I'll be_ lying _to the Elder of the Brotherhood of Steel."_

 _Reagan gave a huff and slapped the scribe on the shoulder. "Calm down, Merr, you're using her messenger, long as you sound like her, the big guy won't even notice."_

 _"_ _But you plan on telling him… eventually, which can get me in a lot of trouble," Merrin complained, looking between the two of them._

 _Madelyn frowned and rubbed her forehead. "I don't like lying to him any more than you do. But we know he'll never let me graduate," she pleaded with her best friend. Reagan sighed and folded her arms over her chest._

 _"_ _She'll do it, Lynnie, don't worry," the knight promised and Madelyn smiled._

 _"_ _Thank you, both of you."_

 _"_ _You just make sure you tell Dansey he needs to call a certain Knight," she confirmed and Madelyn grinned._

 _"_ _You could just come with and see him yourself."_

 _"_ _Oh no, I want him to come crawling to me," she said and leaned against the wall, her head resting against the concrete. For a moment her honey colored eyes drifted off into a memory and Madelyn smiled, knowing it was something about Danse._

 _"_ _So, anything else I have to worry about?"_

 _"_ _Don't let Proctor Teagan see you, he's the only one I think that knows about your orders," Merrin said. "If you run out of squiring missions just go to Proctor Quinlan and offer to aid with a research patrol. He won't want you at first, but just offer to carry stuff for them or something."_

 _"_ _Good to know, I have to stay off the Prydwen as much as possible, otherwise Artie might see me," she suddenly started to nibble on her lip. "Maybe I shouldn't do this…"_

 _Reagan let out a frustrated sound, drawn back from her thoughts of Paladin Danse. "Lynnie, for Christ's sake, just go. You'll do fine. Find the highest ranking person and squire the fuck out of them and then get them to vouch for you and you'll be fine."_

 _Madelyn nodded and continued to think, her eyes narrowed. "I'll miss you guys," she said, looking between them. "And Glass," she added with a pout._

 _Reagan huffed out a snorted laugh. "Yeah, he won't even know you're gone. Say hi to Rhys for me, also, if you see him."_

 _"_ _Oh, and Haylen," Merrin added with a smile._

 _"_ _Okay, so 1. Avoid Arthur. 2. Tell Danse to write. 3. Say hi to Rhys and Haylen 4. Squire highest-ranking field officer. 5. Get promoted. Am I missing anything?"_

 _"_ _Pet Emmett for me?" Merrin added and Madelyn rolled her eyes playfully._

 _"_ _6\. Pet the cat."_

 _"_ _Yes," Merrin nodded, her eyes closed in satisfaction._

 _"_ _Love ya, Lynnie," Reagan grabbed the squire in a quick hug. Merrin then hugged the girl and they smiled at her, sending her off so she could slip onto the airship before it took off._

* * *

Madelyn woke up from the dream to a dark room. She frowned, remembering where she was quickly. The bunkhouse in Sanctuary. They had only gotten there a few hours ago. Why couldn't she sleep?

Sitting up she thought about her friends and then about the list they'd given her. She had avoided Maxson, and was squiring the second highest brotherhood soldier, and she'd pet Emmett. That was a fifty percent. That was a failure. She had failed. "Ugh," Madelyn rubbed her forehead. Sure, two of them could still happen. She hadn't had the chance to see Haylen or Rhys, and she could still get promoted. But… Danse.

Why had it taken her so long to start to think so heavily about this? Had she really been that self-centered? Focused just on getting herself established and on missions so that she didn't compromise her entire reason for blatantly disobeying Arthur's orders. Reagan had been so pissed when Danse asked her to stay back. She had been nice and polite and understanding in front of him, but Madelyn had been there when she started to over turn people's bunks and knocked three Initiates out. What would the Knight do when she learned that the man she loved was not only a synth, but had been executed without being brought in even for questioning?

Shit, Madelyn had to make sure she prepared Nate and maybe even Maxson. Reagan was closer to Arthur than she was to the squire, but that only meant she would be more willing to hit Maxson. Ranking only meant so much. Sure, she could be dishonorably discharged for hitting Maxson, but Reagan didn't seem like the kind of person to care in a fit of anger so hot she would strike the Elder of the Brotherhood of Steel. As cool as it would be to watch, Madelyn didn't want that to happen. So she had to figure out a way to at least be there and help with damage control.

Madelyn got out of bed and looked down at the bed next to hers where Robert was holding Duncan. The moonlight was light and pale on them. She smiled at the two of them and knelt down to kiss Duncan's auburn hair. He had been asleep when they got him, and cranky that he'd been woken up, but she had offered to take him and he seemed to calm down a lot.

Robert stared at her when she carried his son to the bunkhouse. She couldn't help to think it was because he enjoyed seeing them together. She loved holding the boy, and having him fall asleep against her shoulder, his thumb absently lying between his lips as he made quiet snores against her neck.

He would make a great little squire. She wondered if he would be interested in life on the Prydwen, or just with the Brotherhood at all. Despite his distain, Robert would be great in the Brotherhood. She wished he was more open to it, but she didn't want to force it on them. It brought a smile to her face to imagine Robert in a flight suit with pieces of armor clinging to him and his sniper rifle across his chest. At his side Duncan stood at attention dressed in a squire's uniform.

Madelyn grinned stupidly as she left the bunkhouse to find something to occupy herself. From the bunkhouse she could see the faint light from the Sentinel's house, and made her way over there, but when she got closer she could hear Nate and John talking about very intimate things accompanied by some noises she didn't think would be right to interrupt.

So she went to the bar which was nothing compared to Bond's, but it was alive with a few people despite the hour. She sat down at the counter and the bar tender, an older man with silver hair, came to stand in front of her, waiting for her to order something. "I'd like a Nuka-Cherry, if you have it?" she asked simply and he nodded, disappearing then returning with one. She gave him a few caps and he disappeared, leaving her alone.

"What's a young lady like you doing here so late?" a man's voice asked. Madelyn didn't jump, but she tilted her head at him and eyed him before answering.

"Just can't sleep."

"So you get something caffeinated? Sounds like you don't _want_ to sleep." He sat in the stool next to her. He was dressed in a long blue coat that looked odd, kind of cloak like. He had a thick black scarf wrapped around his neck neatly, tucked into his coat in an appealing fashion. His face was young and clean shaved with the exception of a dark line linking his side burns from jaw to chin to jaw. Dark, curly hair was cut short on top of his head, but it had been flattened by sweating while wearing a hat; a hat that he sat down on the bar in front of him. It was a simple thing; she believed Nate had called something similar a fedora once. His lips drew her attention as they curled into a smile, the only scar on his face was there, on the left side. It was thick, and still healing as it cut his upper lip right down passed the lower one. "You always stare when you meet new people?"

"It's a bad habit," she breathed and looked away from him now. She needed to get better at that.

"Oh, I don't mind, I just wanted to know how special I was." He waved for the bar tender to come back and he ordered two beers. Madelyn hoped he wasn't expecting her to drink one. "So, what's your name?"

If he didn't know who she was then he probably wasn't from here. And that put her on edge. "I'm Lyn," she said and turned to look at him politely.

"I'm Patrick Grime. But everyone calls me Rick." He stuck a hand out to her and she shook it, feeling how soft it was.

"What brings you to Sanctuary?"

"You can tell I'm not from here?" he raised an eyebrow.

"It's the coat," she said and drank some of her cola.

"Ah, yes," he looked down at himself and took his beer when it arrived. "So what's a Brotherhood soldier doing this far away from that fancy airship?"

Madelyn barely stifled her shock. "Deserted," she browned. "Couldn't stand it anymore."

"Ah, well, don't let Sentinel Nate Walker hear about that–" the man cut himself off. "Well if he would get his dick out of the 'abomination' his people want exterminated, maybe he'd actually have something to say."

It was very hard for her to play dumb on that one. "Well, you seem to know a lot for a new comer."

"Just every perceptive," he smiled. It was a hypnotizing sight.

"Mmm, nice to know."

"You can relax, Madelyn, you're in no danger here," he said suddenly nd she turned to narrow her eyes at him. His killer smile stuck as his blue eyes bore into her.

"I'm totally relaxed." Her voice was enough to convince herself but she knew her stare made it a lie. He did too. Without looking away from him she took her cola and finished it.

"Of course you are." He stood up and pushed his second beer toward her, his thumb pressing against the cap before he released it. "You tell Mac I said hi, and he's got himself a pretty little squire."

Then he was gone, leaving her staring after him.

Madelyn threw the bottle of beer away without touching where Rick had. Then she practically ran to the bunkhouse. "Rob –Robert," she gasped running up the stairs. She wanted to be quiet, but she also wanted to scream.

When she got to him he was still asleep holding Duncan. She shook the ex-mercenary, trying to keep her fear down. "Mommy…?" Duncan whispered.

Madelyn didn't mind, she touched his face to sooth him. "Hi there, precious."

"Madelyn?" Robert's voice was thick with sleep.

"I need to talk to you–" she breathed and he immediately took in her fear.

"Okay," he rolled out of the bed, holding Duncan against him.

When they were outside she looked around before explaining what happened, feeling her paranoia. His face twisted into anger as her listened. She grew more scared as she spoke and eventually stepped up to him and wrapped her arms around him. He made her feel safe, she knew that he would protect her. Duncan stirred in his sleep and touched her hair. "I don't know how he knew so much. I feel so… violated," she said shakily.

"He's been watching us," he said, his voice low. It scared her more to see him like this, with his nose wrinkled and his brows furrowed.

"Can I…?" she reached for the toddler. Robert's face softened.

"Yes, of course," he knelt down and helped hand over the bay. She held Duncan close, squeezing him against her. He rested his head on her shoulder and breathed onto her neck. She ran her fingers through his hair and closed her eyes, kissing the boy's forehead. It was mostly for herself, she wanted to feel the contact.

MacCready watched her hold his son and sighed softly, his hand running through her hair. She looked up at him. "We have to tell Nate about this." Madelyn nodded her agreement and started to lead the way. "Madelyn," he whispered and she stopped, looking back at him. "Thank you for coming right to me," he said, his hand resting on her shoulder. She looked up at him, her grey eyes soft despite her fear.

"I just… I don't want to be scared anymore. I spent most of my childhood in fear. I never felt safe until I was in the Brotherhood. Now I'm as far away from them as I can be without leaving the Commonwealth and… it scares the hell out of me," she breathed. He nodded, looking into her eyes.

"I understand, I hate being alone, ever since I left Little Lamplight, I haven't been able to trust anyone. Nate… Hancock… you," he squeezed her shoulder, "I trust you three with my life. And that's not something I just hand out." Then his other hand rested on Duncan's head. "Even more importantly I trust you with Duncan."

Madelyn rubbed her cheek against his face and closed her eyes. "I don't know what I'd do if something were to happen to either of you."

Robert shifted his hand from her shoulder to her chin and gently tilted her face up. Her eyes opened and he leaned in, his face close to hers. She expected another forehead kiss, but this time his lips hovered in front of hers. He hung there and she stared into his eyes, then closed hers and the distance. The kiss was soft, loving, and short, as she pulled back away after only a few seconds. Robert smiled and touched his forehead to hers. "I don't want to even think about it."

"We should do this more often," she commented and then sighed. "But we have to go tell Nate."

"Yes," he agreed and held her close to his side while they walked to the metal house on the far side of the settlement.


	16. Blasts From the Past

**I love the comments, thank you so much, it means the world to me. I am currently working on not only The Sentinel's Squire, but also putting together Reagan Knight's story, which runs into this one in this chapter. I hope to get that one worked out and settled in and posted soon so you can get to know her better. I also have plans for Rowan, if you remember her from some chapters back. She's going to be headed to Nuka World. If that's something you're interested in, I hope you stick around for it, as I believe I'll post them once I near the end of this story. I think we're only half way done here. How exciting! I hope you all are enjoying it!**

* * *

Nate kissed the Hancock's shoulder, his hands tracing over the man's uneven skin, lusting after him. "I woke up this morning without you and I…" Nate shook his head, his scruff rubbing the other man's skin.

"Ah, well, I'm here now, and you're not gonna be able to talk me into leaving you for a while now."

"I don't want you to leave me ever again."

"That's good to hear."

Nate's teeth grazed the other man's skin and his hands wrapped around him, pulling him against his chest. One hand slid south, passing over then man's stomach to his waist. "I fucking love you, John."

"Ever the romantic one, Natie," the ghoul's gruff voice showed his smile. Nate then gently pushed him over, onto the bed where he remained on his hands and knees for a moment. Nate climbed onto the bed too and grabbed John's hips and pulled him back to press the man's ass against his erection.

Nate moved his hands onto the ghoul's ass and spread the cheeks apart so that he could spit down onto the tiny hole. Then he rubbed the head of his cock against the other man to get himself good and wet. Nate's steadying hand on the man's waist showed how tense the ghoul was. "John, relax," he whispered, bending down to kiss his back.

"Sorry–" he grunted and took a deep breath.

"We don't have to do this, love," Nate frowned and started to back off, not wanting to force himself onto him.

"No, no, I want to, come on," John bent around to look at him.

"Okay," Nate whispered and carefully prodded the smaller man. He groaned and then the Sentinel was in. "Mmm," he massaged John's back with callused hands and the ghoul relaxed more under his touch.

Moving slowly at first, Nate added a little more saliva to aid them, and then grabbed the man's hips and pulled him back in a single rough slap. "Mmm, Nate," he grunted, clamping down around him in shock. The General smiled, his eyes rolling over his lover as he thrust into him. John made soft sounds into a pillow that he grabbed, pressing his face into it in pleasure before turning to gasp for air.

Nate leaned over him and reached around to grab the other man's cock, stroking it in time with his thrusts. Based on the pleasured sounds that came from below, he was doing something right. They whispered endearments and grunted the others name.

Hancock came first, muffling Nate's name into his pillow. Nate hissed, trying to hold back until the smaller man went limp, and then allowed himself to come. They had to be quiet because Shaun was asleep on the couch in the living room, where he'd been since before they got home. Nate needed to build him a bedroom. He wished he had the time.

"Oh, Nate," John whispered, relaxing against the mattress for a moment before looking up at the General. "Bet you're proud of yourself, aren't you?"

"Always," he kissed the ghoul's cheek, embracing him before dismounting the bed and finding a towel to clean them up. "I love you, John," Nate informed the other man when he was done.

"I love you, too, Natie," he ghoul breathed, his gruff voice deep with exhaustion.

Hancock settled in and Nate stood up at the foot of the bed, stretching his arms before pulling on a pair of shorts and climbed in to hold his love. Sleep had just relaxed Nate's body when there was a gentle knock on the front door. "Mmm," John shifted. "I'll get it."

Nate sighed, letting his hand on the man slide down to the mattress when he left.

In the other room he heard Hancock open the door and say something about Maddy. Then Maddy's voice came through, and Nate rolled out of the bed, knowing what he heard wasn't good. "What's wrong?" John was asking when Nate came around the corner.

Shaun was waking up, rubbing his eyes as Maddy, R.J., and Duncan came into the house. "We have a problem," MacCready frowned, and that was when he noticed Madelyn was shaking as she held Duncan to her.

She explained about a man named Rick who knew far too much despite the information given to him. "What did he look like?"

"Dark hair, uh, just a beard," she drew a line with her thumb along her jaw. "He wore a coat, and a scarf. It was a weird coat…." She frowned and Nate shifted, grabbing up his pack and pulled out one of the drawings Lana had given him.

"Anything like this?"

"No… not really," she shook her head, her eyes flickering over it. "I mean… if I forced myself to, I could say they look similar," she added, frowning.

"What about this one?" he showed her another.

"Nope, not at all."

"This?"

"Eh…" she frowned, her nose wrinkling. Duncan stirred and she shifted him in her arm, but Robert took his son, relieving her of the extra weight.

"Last one," Nate offered and she looked at it.

Her nose scrunched, "No, he didn't look like that."

Nate frowned and sighed. "Well, damn, of course that would have been too lucky," he rubbed his forehead before tucking the drawings back away.

"Okay, so he's a creep," Hancock frowned, sitting down on the couch and MacCready joined him, holding the grumbling toddler in his lap.

"I feel like there's more to it," Nate said, glaring at nothing in particular.

"Dad…" Shaun complained, looking around. He noticed how his boy and Madelyn stared at each other for a second.

"You can go in the bedroom, Shaun," he said and the boy sighed as he got up and left. "If Duncan wants, he can also," Nate added and Robert got up to take the sleeping toddler to bed.

"What else do you remember about him, Maddy?" Hancock asked, relaxing into the couch. He was dressed in a pair of pants and nothing else. Madelyn sat down next to him, close enough that their legs touched. Nate couldn't help but smile a little. She had never done that before.

"He… his hands were soft, like he's never worked a day in his life," she said, her brows pulled together. "And when he smiled…" she shook her head and R.J. came back into the room. "He was… really, and I mean, really attractive," she looked uncomfortable and the ex-gunner raised an eyebrow. Before anyone could say anything she continued, "I don't think I've ever seen someone _that_ attractive. It was… unnatural," she decided and looked between the men.

Nate's thick brows pulled together, casting his pale blue eyes into shadow. Madelyn wouldn't have brought it up if it wouldn't have been weird. "Did he have an accent?"

She frowned, thinking, "I don't think so, I mean, he was… very charismatic, but I don't think he had an accent."

Nate leaned against one of the support pillars in the living room and looked down at the three who stared at him, waiting. He frowned and closed his eyes. "Why are you all looking at me?"

"You're the one who always figures this stuff out, Nate," R.J. said off handedly. "Don't quite know how shi–crap got done before you came around."

He felt his jaw clench. "Well, I don't have anything this time," he said, meeting each of their eyes before straightening off the wall. "I don't know what to do from here."

"We work together," Madelyn said, her hands resting on the knees of MacCready and Hancock on either side of her. "We'll get to the bottom of this, whether or not this guy has anything to do with the settlement attacks."

"Right on," Hancock nodded and stood, touching Nate's bare shoulder. "You're not alone on this."

"I wish I wasn't in charge of it," he grumbled and pinched the bridge of his nose feeling the lack of sleep filling his eyes.

"Can… I stay here?" Madelyn asked softly and Nate looked at her in surprise.

"Of course, Maddy."

She nodded her thanks and MacCready wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her into his side so he could kiss her temple. The motion actually warmed Nate's heart, seeing her relax against R.J.. "You can stay also," Hancock said to the other man.

"Thank you," MacCready said and removed his hat to rest it on the barrel of his sniper rifle.

Nate and Hancock went to their bedroom to check on the kids. Shaun was fast asleep, but Duncan was rubbing his eyes and lying on his back. "You want to go sleep with your dad, kid?" Hancock asked and Duncan nodded a bunch before rolling out of the bed ungracefully and then scampered into the other room.

Nate heard Madelyn's soft cooing and imagined her holding him between her and MacCready. They were a good little family. As if they'd been made for each other. Hancock glanced at Nate who was standing by the bed, staring at nothing. "You okay, there, big guy?"

He looked down at the smaller man who lied so that Nate could climb over him and sleep in the middle between him and Shaun. "Yeah, I'm good. Just thinking."

"Well, save that for the morning," he sighed and closed his eyes. Nate turned off the soft light of the lamp on the night stand and got into the middle of the bed, giving Shaun's hair a kiss before rolling over and embracing John.

* * *

Much to his surprise, when Nate woke up he was the only one in the bed. With squinted eyes he looked out the bright door at the foot of his bed, which was propped open, showing him his wooden patio with a small group of people standing around drinking and eating. He sighed and rolled over, running a hand over his scalp, through the remaining black hair atop his head and the rough sides where stubble was already growing.

"Daddy's awake!"

Nate was then tackled and he heaved a breath as it was pressed out of him by Shaun. "Hey there," he blindly grabbed for his boy and found him. He picked him up and gently wrestled him onto the mattress, tickling the boy along the way.

"Dad–!" Shaun giggled in protest and Nate opened his eyes, smiling. Shaun's bright eyes looked just like his mother's. When he looked at the group outside Madelyn was standing with Duncan clinging to her leg and MacCready leaned against a support beam near by. It was a nice sight, especially when John stepped into the doorway and gave Nate a crooked grin.

"You gonna get outa bed?"

"Nah, I think I'll just stay here until the world ends again."

"As nice as that would be, I don't think we have time for that." The voice caught Nate off guard and he sat up immediately to look out onto the porch. The ghoul that stepped into view wasn't familiar to him, but he knew exactly who he was without having to be told.

"Shaun…"

"Been a while Nate," his father-in-law sighed.

Nate threw himself out of the bed and went to the old ghoul. "I had no idea you…"

"Oh, put a shirt on," a woman's scratchy voice came from behind him. Nate turned to see a female ghoul sitting at the breakfast table he and Hancock used on their free days.

"Beth," Nate smiled, his heart warmed at the sight of them. The woman stood up and opened her arms awkwardly for a hug from the massive man. He bent and embraced her. She was so small, shorter and thinner than Nora had been, but had the same blonde hair, even after all this time. "I didn't know you two made it," he said, his face shaded with disbelief as he looked between them.

"Well, we would have visited sooner, but we only just learned that the fella doing all these good works around the Commonwealth was Nate Walker," Beth Marshall patted his bare arm. "Don't hand out your name much do you?"

He smiled down at her and then looked at Shaun, his face turning serious. "Is Luke…?"

"Luke is good, last we heard from him," Shaun frowned, shifting his weight. "He ran off to Goodneighbor a little while ago."

Nate glanced at Hancock who gave a shrug and shook his head. "Oh, I'm sorry," the General frowned and his father-in-law shrugged.

"He was never the same after the bombs."

"How has it been so long," Beth asked, touching his face suddenly, "And you look the same?"

"I–uh, we," the flash of memories hit Nate like a freight train. "We went to the Vault, and they… froze us."

"What happened to Nora? John here said it would be best for you to explain," Shaun asked, his hand gripping the other ghoul's shoulder. It was a strange sight, obviously Hancock hadn't told them about their relationship. That was a conversation that Nate wasn't sure he wanted to have.

"We were unfrozen a few years back, and Nora was…" he took a deep breath. "Killed," he finally said and then felt his son wrap his arms around his waist. He rested a hand on the boy's head. "They took Shaun, and I was refrozen. When I woke up I… went to find him," he decided not to mention that this boy wasn't the real Shaun. He was growing, he saw the development, and when he was old enough to understand Nate would tell him about being a synth, but until then, he didn't need to be treated differently.

The Marshalls looked at each other with grave expressions, but two hundred years without their daughter had softened the blow of learning she really was dead. "I knew she wasn't around," Beth said, looking down at her grandson. "Come here, boy," she opened her arms and he hugged, her eager for the attention.

"You've been getting on well," Shaun commented as a change of subject, looking at the metal house.

"Yes, it's been a lot of work, I don't get to come home as often as I'd like," he said and then looked at Madelyn who had sat down with MacCready and Duncan to allow them to speak. She was focused on the boy in her lap, playing with him by poking his nose and then retreating behind her hands. Nate smiled and returned his attention to his father-in-law. "How did you hear I was here?"

"Carla," Beth said with a smile, brushing young Shaun's hair away from his face.

"Ah," Nate nodded and Hancock chuckled.

"I'm sorry you caught us at such a bad time," he said politely to Shaun who was larger than him, but not as big as Nate. "We're having some problems with our settlements being… attacked."

"Oh dear," Beth frowned, straightening up.

"Yes," Nate agreed and frowned. "We aren't sure what's happening to them. The residents –we think– are being taken hostage, but we've not heard anything from the people who took them."

"I knew there was something strange going on," Shaun frowned and looked at John. "There aren't as many caravans as there were a few months ago, and even the raiders seemed to have been thinned out."

"We hadn't even thought about that," Nate frowned at himself, disappointed with missing the detail. "That is a _lot_ of people to be taking."

"How big is this group? What do they do with them when they have them?" John's nose wrinkled and Nate couldn't help but look at Maddy who was staring between them with wide, grey eyes. She was holding Duncan against her chest, stroking his hair absently, but the boy didn't seem the least bit upset, he didn't understand what was going on.

"Oh, stop with all this depressing talk," Beth sighed, annoyed. "We came to talk and be happy and every five seconds you two bring up something that makes my spine cold."

"I'm sorry, Beth," Nate apologized.

"You better be." She squeezed her grandson and straightened up. "Now, are you going to tell me about this young lady or not?" She gestured to the squire who now widened her eyes in surprise.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I introduced myself as Madelyn Dangerfield, Nate's Squire from the Brotherhood of Steel," she said and stood up, handing the boy over to MacCready who kept quiet.

"How did you get such a cute squire?" Beth asked and pinched Madelyn's cheek, which perked with her smile at the contact.

"I'm just really lucky," Nate shook his head in happiness. "I couldn't have asked for a better one. Madelyn has excelled quicker that I could have hoped, and she's… become family." The Sentinel wrapped an arm around her shoulder and pulled her into his side, kissing the top of her green head.

"Oh, stop, you make me sound so much better than I am," she protested lightly, gently elbowing him in the abdomen, but she didn't pull away.

Young Shaun's arms wrapped around Nate's hip and he released Maddy to bend and grab his boy, lifting the ten-year-old easily. "Maddy's like my sister," he informed his grandparents and Nate checked Madelyn's reaction. Her eyebrows perked in surprise, and her eyes softened in happiness. She hadn't expected that.

"So when are you gonna get this boy a mother, huh?" Beth asked, brushing young Shaun's hair out of his face again as he'd messed it up. She had to reach up high now that Nate held the boy.

Here it was. Nate opened his mouth, but his boy spoke first, "John is my other dad, I don't need another mommy."

Beth raised an eyebrow and looked at the ghoul standing beside her husband and Nate turned to also. Shaun clapped a hand on the smaller ghoul's shoulder and said, "Close friends are normally uncles, not dads?"

"Well, I'm more than a close friend," John said with a hit of reservation. His black eyes locked with Nate's.

"John and I," the General started to explain and then Beth gasped.

"Oh–" her hand fluttered to cover her mouth in realization. "Oh, you two. Oh."

Shaun's hand on John's shoulder fell and he looked at Nate with narrowed eyes. "Ah, I knew there was something odd about you."

"I…" Nate frowned, setting his son down so that he could better address his in-laws. "I don't want you to take this as something other than what it is."

"What is it if it's not what we think?" Beth asked.

"I love Nora, still, I…" pain filled him at his words. "I remember her, and the pain is fresh. But I love John as well." Nate went to the ghoul, an arm encircling the ghoul's waist. "Without John, I wouldn't have been able to escape my grief. Losing Nora was crippling. But I loved her just as much as I love John."

"So you… don't prefer men," Beth clarified.

"No," Nate shook his head. "I see men and women equally, the same as humans and ghouls. I don't… care about that. I care about the person."

"Oh," Beth glanced at her husband and then back to Nate.

"So only half a sugar bomb," Shaun said, his lips turned down in a slight frown.

"I guess," Nate tried to smile. In his arm Hancock wrapped an arm around him and rested his head on his shoulder.

"Well, you two are very cute…" Beth breathed and then sighed. "Well, get your skinny butt over here, John," she opened her arms and the ghoul smile, stepped free of Nate to embrace the woman. "Just means I get another son. Hope you're not trouble."

"Trouble's my middle name, Beth," John promised and she laughed light. Then Shaun held a hand out and John shook it, smiling up at the larger ghoul. "Thank you," he said sincerely to the man.

"You're taking care of our grandson, it makes you family. I can't tell Nate how to live his life, and who am I to judge him?" Shaun looked at Nate with steady eyes. It would take him time, but he was willing to try.

"That means the world to us," John said and then faced everyone. "Well, if it weren't ten in the morning this is when I'd break out the drinks."

Beth chuckled, "Who cares what time it is, we aren't going anywhere."

"Do you plan to stay in Sanctuary?"

"For a time, if you'll have us."

"Of course," Nate smiled and led them into his house to prepare some drinks and food.

* * *

Three days of sitting in Sanctuary had been just what _didn't_ want to do. But it had almost been required. Madelyn, MacCready, and even Hancock voted they relax. Nate was going to run them ragged out in the waste, and even though they all were younger than him. They called bullshit on him being ready to go, and it wasn't until he sat down on his couch with the knowledge that he had at least three days of _nothing_ that I realized they were right.

Nate was _exhausted_ , and it hadn't just been from running around. His emotions had been on over drive lately too, but that was a part of this new world. He'd been on the go ever since he left that Vault. Even with little more than a year of time between destroying the Institute and now he could count on his hands how many days he'd done _nothing_.

He knew the waste like the back of his hand, and was always helping settlements in need, clearing out disturbances, or building something. He wasn't a complainer, though, and he had never even admitted to himself he wanted a break. It took those closest to him to force him down.

"Here, drink this," John handed him a bottle of beer.

"Thanks, love," Nate sighed, sitting up on the bed to take in a long sigh before drinking.

"You want to just chill tonight?" the ghoul asked, sitting on the foot of the bed with a leg tucked under him. They had gone at it several times, trying different things out; on the counter, the living room floor, against the wall, that sort of thing. Nate was wiped, though, and John was giving him the 'come get me' smile.

"I have a feeling you would like to do a little more than that."

"Well we haven't–" A knock at the door cut the ghoul off. "I'll get it."

"Okay, it's probably just Maddy."

John left the room and Nate took a sip of his beer, looking out the door at the late evening of Sanctuary. "Uh, Nate… I think it's for you." Nate stood up at the sound of unease in the ghoul's voice. He came around the corner into the living room.

"Who is… it…?" he stopped in front of the couch, staring at the suit of Brotherhood T-60 power armor filling the doorway, pointing a gun at Hancock whose arms were raised in surrender. He could only guess how this looked, with the ghoul and Nate shirtless, alone together in a house.

The suit spoke, breaking the silence. "I am Knight Reagan Knight, I served under Paladin Sebastian Danse in the Capital Wasteland." Her voice was strong, but young, and as she spoke her laser rifle lowered. She was gaging his reaction.

Pain pumped through him, and sadness overwhelmed him. "You know… what happened, then?" he asked, hoping he didn't have to tell her.

"You killed him," she said simply.

"He was ordered to kill him," John defended Nate.

The suit turned on him, and then backed a step up. She ejected from the power armor and grabbed her rifle from the hand of the suit, pointing it at John with skill. "I suggest you stay quiet."

"That an order, Knight Knight?" John asked with just a little too much bite. As funny of a name as that was, this was _not_ the time to be smart.

"It's a friendly suggestion, abomination." The word that Nate hated even more than Hancock had.

"You are aware that Danse was a synth, yes?" If she considered ghouls abominations, then so were synths, and her feelings may not be what he originally anticipated. Nate stepped toward her, arms raised. She turned on him, the end of her gun steady.

"I was informed that he had _always_ been one, meaning that he was unaware to what he was and that he wasn't a threat to the Brotherhood."

"I whole hearedly agree," Nate nodded, and she narrowed her eyes at him. "I didn't want to kill him, Knight."

"Why not?"

That question caught him off guard. "Because… well, I, uh," he frowned, looking for a word, "Loved him."

He hated saying it in front of Hancock, but the look on the woman's face showed she was just as upset. She looked like Nate had just punched her in the chest, and her finger twitched, probably without her intention, firing her laser rifle at Nate. The red beam flashed across the room, skimming the Sentinel's arm, and hit the wall behind him.

John took that as her attack and grabbed a knife from behind him, then leapt forward. She turned on him, bashing the butt of her weapon into the ghoul's chest to stagger him back. "No! Stop!" Nate ordered and the Knight fell back a step out of what looked like habit. This put her outside while John held the knife ready, a hand pressed against his sternum to apply pressure to his aching bone. "Thank you," Nate came forward, standing between them.

He could feel her eyes as he looked and touched John with concerned, light fingers. Then John met his eyes, telling him without words he'd be fine. "You're fucking a ghoul?" her face twisted in disgust.

Nate heard the sniper rifle's action snap into place right before it fired. The knight did as well, and ducked, hitting her knee as the bullet flashed over her where her head would have been. She looked to the side to see who was firing on her, but Nate didn't have to see to know it was R.J.

"MacCready!" Nate shouted in warning, going to the door as the man prepared another shot. "Stand down."

The sniper looked at him with a flicker of his eyes and then returned his shadowed gaze to the knight. Her jaw set and she kept her rifle pointed at Nate. "She'll shoot you, Nate, I can see it in her eyes," MacCready protested.

"She won't," he knew she couldn't.

"Who the hell is she?"

"None of your business, merc," she snapped. He tilted his head at her, just slightly, surprised. "Yeah, I can read it all over you," she informed him.

"Reagan?" Madelyn's voice came from behind MacCready.

The knight's attention flickered passed the ex-mercenary, and she dropped her rifle. "Lynnie…?"

Madelyn smiled and came forward as the woman straightened up. "I can't believe it's you…" she was stopped by MacCready, though, as he held her back. The knight glared at the touch, but Madelyn rested a hand on his shoulder, and he looked up at her, seeming to relax some. When she looked back at the knight her smile was wide. "What're you doing here?"

"Trying to kill Nate," R.J. said and stood up.

Madelyn frowned, "Oh… Danse…?"

Nate could see the pain that flooded through the knight. Tears filled her eyes and Madelyn ran up to her, wrapping her up in a hug. "I… Arthur told me…" the knight whispered, circling her arms around the smaller girl. She pressed her cheek against Maddy's green hair. So they both knew Maxson well enough to call him by his first name.

"I'm so sorry, Reagan," Madelyn whispered.

"No… no one told me…" she sobbed. "I came…. I came to the Commonwealth to–to tell him how I–" she cut herself off and sniffled, the tears falling onto her cheeks now.

Madelyn looked up at her. "I'm so sorry, Reagan," she said again and then looked back at the sniper. "Robert… will you tell her about… what you said, about Danse?"

Nate was also curious, as he had known more about the Paladin than MacCready. The sniper looked uncomfortable with all the stares. "I heard him in his sleep once, while we were camped," he gestured to Nate and then himself. "He was saying something about a Knight Knight, I thought it was gibberish. But it sounded like he was talking about a person who was… pretty important."

Of course, Nate had missed it. But now, as he watched grief fill the woman in front of him her knees going weak, he couldn't deny the past any longer. "Do… you know anything else?" she asked, her voice now soft.

Nate spoke. "I know that he spoke very highly of a knight in his service that he left behind." He had never named her, probably because of how laughable the title was, or to protect her for some reason. "I was… blinded by my feelings for him, and never realized that the admiration he showed was more than that." She looked surprised.

"He… talked about me?"

"I didn't want to believe it, but hind sight's 20/20, and now that I connect the dots, I realized that what I imagined between us was just that." He wallowed. "I didn't want to kill him Knight. I tried to talk him out of it. He told me he had 'to be the example, not the exception', and I couldn't talk him out of it."

"That's Danse," she whispered, looking down at her hands. She almost looked like she wanted to hit something. Instead, she pressed her knuckles into her palms, and listened to them crack several times before MacCready spoke.

"He is buried not far from here, I can take you."

That surprised her, and her tears fell with new force. "Buried?"

"I couldn't just let him rot," Nate said and she looked at him, her eyes blurred with grief.

"I… I'd love to see it."

"Okay, just follow me," MacCready said and led her away, up to the entrance to Vault 111.

 _Danse sat down next to the fire and Nate grinned at him, passing him a beer. The Paladin took it and frowned. "Oh, stop, we've secured the place, you're allowed to relax some, Danse." MacCready huffed, lying down on his sleeping bag and adjusted his hat on his head so that he could get some sleep before his watch._

 _"_ _It's not the beer," Danse sighed and flicked the cap off with his thumb. "It's actually the brand."_

 _"_ _What about it?" Nate's brows pulled together and he ran a hand through his hair. It was getting too long again, almost coming down to his collar. He might just have to shave it like Maxson's or something at the rate it grew. He was only a knight, so he had to follow the protocols even if he was off doing his own thing._

 _"_ _Reminds me of a knight under my command, she always despised this name," he shook his head and took a sip, then winced. "With good reason."_

 _"_ _Hah, well, we don't really have much to chose from."_

 _"_ _Yeah," Danse's dark eyes looked into the fire and Nate shifted closer to him, his eyes flickering to MacCready to see if the man was asleep. "Can I ask you something?" the Paladin asked, suddenly and Nate nodded._

 _"_ _Of course," he pressed his beer to his lips and met the man's gaze, which he broke almost immediately. Nate took it was Danse being shy, playing with him._

 _"_ _Do you…" he shifted uncomfortable, rolling his shoulders before he continued. "Do you think that a relationship within a squad is inappropriate? Especially when… engaged by the higher ranking officer?"_

 _Nate smirked. "Danse, if you like someone you need to tell them. Ranking shouldn't stop you."_

 _"_ _What if they don't share the same feelings?" Danse's brow creased as he stared at the fire. "What if I've been misreading all of the tells…?"_

 _"_ _Trust me, you haven't been misreading anything," Nate smiled and Danse glanced at him before nodding, and pressing the beer to his lips. The Paladin grimaced at the taste as he swallowed, not saying another word._

Nate felt stupid. Of course he'd been talking about someone else. The memory was clear as day in his mind. Danse had been worried about his feelings about the Knight he'd left behind in the Capital, not the one he was mentoring here in the Commonwealth.

Nate ran a hand through his hair and John frowned at him. "I know I shouldn't be, but I'm feeling a little jealous of Dansey right about now."

The Sentinel's blue eyes flickered up to the black-eyed ghoul and regret filled him. "Oh, John…" Nate stood from where he'd sat down and encircled the smaller man in an embrace.

"I don't know why I let it bother me so much," he sighed, resting his face in Nate's throat. "I mean, the man's not around, it's not like he can take you from me."

"No one can take me from you," Nate whispered and kissed his head. "I mean it, John."

"Yeah… I know that, I guess I'm not as chill as I put on."

Nate's lips moved down to the man's face, kissing his cheek and then the corner of his mouth. He gently tilted the other man's chin up so that he looked him in the eye. "I love you, John, with all my heart."

"Damn, just kiss me," he sighed, and Nate smiled.

Closing the distance, the Sentinel's mouth pressed against the ghoul's, the stubble of his face rough against uneven flesh. Nate's hand on his chin shifted, holding the ghoul's neck, while the other hand pulled him close by pressing against his back. Hancock's arms wrapped around the larger man's neck and he stretched up on his toes to get a deeper kiss.

"I'll always love you, John."

"Christ, you really know how to make me feel like a little girl, don't you?"

Nate smiled and met his lover's eyes. "Hey… I," he shifted, pressing his forehead against the other man's. "I wanted to know… if you wanted to have this…." Nate pulled away and disappeared into the bedroom before returning with a silver chain holding a golden ring. "It… was Nora's wedding ring," he explained, holding it gently in his hand.

John's black eyes widened and he met Nate's blue ones. "I… are you sure?"

"Of course I am, John," he said and opened up the chain to free the ring. "I wore it for a long time, but… I think it's time to give it to you."

The smile on Hancock's face was everything that he'd expected. "I don't know what to say."

"Say yes to being me husband, maybe?" Nate knelt down, looking up at the ghoul. That surprised him, and John's jaw dropped, parting his lips.

"Oh, Natie, you romantic fuck," he breathed and then started nodding. "Of course I'll be your damn husband."

Nate smirked and took the man's smaller hand and slid the ring easily onto his ring finger. How lucky John had such skinny fingers. Nate shifted forward, his face resting against his stomach. The ghoul's hands ran through his hair, and he sighed. "This is not how I imagined this night going."

"Me either, to be honest." Nate stood up and kissed Hancock again.

A few hours later Nate was taking apart his sniper rifle, licking his lips, as he could still taste John on them. The ghoul was cleaning, feeling chipper and wide-awake from their lovemaking. Nate didn't know how he did it.

A knock on the door called John to it, and Nate listened as he put pieced together.

"Yeah?" he heard Hancock frown.

"I came to speak with the Sentinel before I returned to the Prydwen," the knight said. Nate stiffened and started to clear up some space. "Let her in, please, John."

"Your funeral," he sighed and Nate heard the woman come in, and looked up when she entered the living room. "Excuse the mess," John said and slipped around her to go to the couch on the opposite side of the room, away from them, by the back door.

"Please, Knight," Nate gestured for her to sit and she did in the couch that faced a table with the radio which was playing softly. "What was it that you needed to talk about?" he asked her.

"I wanted to apologize for firing on you, sir, and for how I acted." She leaned into her words, showing she meant them. He looked at her, giving her a friendly smile. His arm was already covered in scars, what was one more?

"You're fine, Knight, I took no offence," he promised.

"Thank you, sir, that's… gracious of you," she looked surprised as she let out a long breath.

"I'm sure I would have had a similar reaction if I had learned the news you did." He frowned, setting down a couple of pieces of his weapon and straightened so that he was facing her better. "I think about Danse a lot. What I did… I regret it. I wish I could have done it differently, but," he shook his head. "He talked me into it, and I couldn't talk him out of it."

She nodded her understanding. "I wanted to kill you," she said honestly. "Or at least punch you. You aren't what I imagined," she breathed. "I thought you were going to be like… Maxson."

"Hah," he smiled and shook his head, and John scoffed. "I don't think I could ever be like him. Don't get me wrong, I respect him, he's our Elder, but he also is very young, and he does lack the knowledge that life brings. He's… dedicated, but I almost think it's too much," the Sentinel sighed and then looked back at her. "Don't misunderstand me. I will do almost anything he orders me to. But I draw the line when it supersedes my own beliefs."

"You won't kill your ghoul for him," she clearified.

"Never," he agreed. "Nothing could force me to harm John."

"Nor I Nate," the ghoul interjected, and she looked at him. She looked between the two of them and then nodded.

"The merc said you two were perfect for each other, I don't even need the five minutes he suggested for me to believe it."

"Thank you," Nate's brow creased, showing his sincerity. "Was there anything else you wanted to talk about before you took your leave?"

"I just wanted to check in on Madelyn."

"Madelyn Dangerfield is the best squire I could have asked for," he smiled. "I see her as a daughter more often than not now. I can't imagine not having her at my side anymore."

"So you would stand for her graduation to Knight?"

"Of course, I don't think she's quite there yet, but when the time comes," he nodded, and glanced at John who nodded his head in agreement.

"Good," she stood. "It was a pleasure, sir." She saluted him and he stood, returning the gesture. "Ad Victoriam, Sentinel."

"Ad Victoriam, Knight."

"I hope to see you again, sir," she added as he walked her out.

"As do I," he smiled and she looked his way before climbing into her power armor and left the settlement to return to the Prydwen.


	17. Punishments

"Your friend was… different," Robert said as he sat down next to Madelyn on the bench facing the playground. Sanctuary had put up a few streetlamps to provide nighttime light here so that people could visit it at any hour, and right now that was perfect because Duncan was anything but tired.

"Reagan?" Madelyn glanced over at him and smiled a little, he nodded. "Yeah, she's… a lot."

"She cares about you," he said and held her hand. She looked at the contact, smiling.

"I know. I don't think I've ever seen her so… emotionally compromised," she decided were the right words. "But Danse was important to her," she sighed. "I think she'll be better now, I know her well enough to know that she needed this."

"I would have shot her," he said softly and Madelyn looked at him, frowning. "If she wouldn't have ducked her head would have painted Nate's wall…." He looked down in shame. "I can't even imagine how much pain that would have caused you."

She touched his face, getting him to meet her gaze. "You didn't hurt her. You helped her, Robert," she shimmied closer to him, her arm wrapping around him, comfortingly. "Reagan's not going out that easy, even if you would have hit her, she would have found a way to live."

He forced himself to smile and she ran her thumb over his lips. "She asked if I loved you."

Madelyn's eyebrows perked and she felt something bubble up in her chest. "Want did you tell her?"

"What do you think I told her?" he leaned closer to her, his arm around her shoulders, pulling her to him.

"That you can't stand me," she whispered, looking at his lips, watching them part with his breath.

"Close," he smirked and she looked into his eyes.

"I don't know if I'm ready," Madelyn said softly, feeling herself tremble lightly from her core.

He nodded, and pressed his forehead against hers. "I told you we wouldn't do anything you don't want to. This is going to go at your pace."

"Thank you," she closed her eyes and took in the feeling of him holding her. "I don't need much more time," she promised and felt him kiss her forehead.

"You have _all_ the time you need."

"I don't know what I've done to deserve you," Madelyn whispered into his neck as she climbed onto him, getting closer. He pulled her into his lap and held her, watching his son, as he swung high into the air, challenging Shaun, who was winning because of the age gap.

"I was wondering the same thing," he told her honestly.

Shaun jumped out of the swing and hit the ground, but he wasn't able to balance and fell with a huff. MacCready watched closely, his brows pulling together as Duncan slowed his swing until he was lower, and then also jumped, but the distance was a fraction of Shaun's and he landed smoothly, wobbling only slightly with his low agility. Madelyn straightened up, frowning.

Shaun glared at the younger boy when Duncan cheered, "I won."

"No you didn't, I went farther."

"You fell," Duncan pointed out, and MacCready stood up, dropping Madelyn onto her feet when he saw Shaun's hands ball up into fists.

"You're just a baby, you weren't swinging high at all!"

"I'm not a baby!" Duncan stomped a foot and Shaun pushed him to the ground. "Oof!"

"Shaun!" Robert barked in warning. The boy ignored him and when Duncan tried to stand up he pushed him down again. "Leave him alone!"

"You're not my dad!"

"I'm his dad, and your dad's friend. I am also an adult, and you will listen to me," Robert informed him, taking the older boy by the arm to pull him away. "I'll be telling your father about this."

"Fine!"

He released him and Shaun shook his arm as if he'd ripped it from MacCready's hand. Madelyn rested a hand on his shoulder to try to calm him down, but he shook her off, stomping away. Robert knelt next to his son as he inspected a scuff on his elbow.

"I had it, daddy," he whispered and looked up at Robert with teary blue eyes.

"I know, pup, I'm just the back up," he rustled his hair and stood up, allowing the boy to pick himself up. Madelyn had to force herself not to run to him and kiss his owey and make sure he was good. The boy sniffed and wiped his nose with the back of his sleeve and looked at Shaun's retreating back.

"He's the baby." Madelyn smiled a little at the grumpy face Duncan used as a mask.

"Come on, pup, time for bed." MacCready scooped him up and she walked with a hand around his waist to the bunkhouse.

"I wonder what having your own room feels like," Madelyn whispered to herself as she sat down on a bed beside the boys as they kicked off their boots, mirroring each other without seeming to realize it.

Robert looked at her, pausing with the bullet garter on his thigh. "It's really nice, actually, don't have to talk in hushed tones not to wake others up," he glanced around and she smiled.

"I guess that's a weird thought. I mean, Arthur and I shared a room when I was really little, but when he got to be… important, I moved in with the other squires, and he gradually moved up until he got his own quarters with the other Tops. I like spending time in there, I just wish he didn't drink so much," she added, remembering all the alcohol.

"Strikes me as a drinker," Robert said offhandedly and shrugged out of his duster, and under coat. He was left in an off white tank top that clung to him like it was just a smidge too small.

"I think it's getting worse," she commented, her eyes locked on the sniper's now bare arms as they stretched in the darkness. This showed off the dark hair toughed in his armpits, which clashed with his paleness in the starlight. "When I snuck into his room he had a lot of bottles sitting around…" she shook her head, looking away from MacCready so she could remove her bracers and then lied down on her back. Her eyes found a particularly uninteresting beam in the ceiling and glued themselves to it.

"I'm sure he's just stressed. He's what? Twenty? And runs the entire Brotherhood of Steel?" he frowned. He probably never thought he'd try to sympathize with Maxson.

"Just the East Coast, but he's a Maxson, so he'll probably get promoted to High Elder when the others think he's ready."

"What's the difference?"

"High Elder runs the _entire_ Brotherhood," she looked over at him now.

"And he's basically your brother," MacCready let out a shaky breath.

"Hah, yeah," she smiled at him looking so uncomfortable. "Good night, Rob," she whispered, rolling over onto her side, her back turning to him.

"Oh, it's Rob now is it?" she heard him laugh and then the springs whined in protest as he crawled in behind Duncan.

* * *

Pain in her stomach woke Madelyn from her sleep. She felt sick, sicker than she'd ever felt before in her life. Weakness filled her arms and legs, making them feel heavy and sluggish as she tired to open her eyes and look around the bunkhouse. The sensation of vomiting pressed against her throat and she gagged, but bit down hard, clenching her jaw shut to keep it back.

When her eyes focused she was looking at the mouth of an old, prewar military caravan vehicle. Sitting on the open door were bright yellow barrels giving off a sickly smell as well as making the air around them blur with radiation. "Oh God…"

Madelyn stood up and looked around her. She had nothing but what she'd gone to sleep in, and there was nothing in the vehicle. The only way out was passed the barrels pressed up against each other to block the gaping mouth. She had been put here to die from radiation poisoning, and she was getting close to blacking out, she could feel it.

She had to get out of here, even though getting closer would speed up the process, she was going to die if she just stayed here. After a couple of deep breaths, Madelyn rushed forward, slamming into the barrels. It hurt, they were heavy, and she just barely was able to push one over, and fell passed it into the morning light. Coughing, she looked around, noticing now that there were more barrels out here, piled up and thrown around haphazardly. Her head drifted, and she felt herself lose her thoughts.

She had to hold on, but she couldn't think about anything other than how light her head felt and how heavy her arms and legs were.

Absently she realized, only after she'd done it, that she'd thrown up. She couldn't feel anything, but she forced herself to crawl toward the water passed the barrels.

Madelyn called out, but the sound didn't make it passed her teeth.

Her hands touched water, but she didn't feel it.

She kept crawling, not realizing the water made it up to her chin, which hung down so she could breathe through her mouth. Water splashed up onto her face but she kept her eyes locked on the other shore, though she couldn't see it. Everything was dark, a thick blur of nothingness. She just knew she had to get away from those rads.

A large rock in the water tripped her hand, and Madelyn fell, unable to summon the strength to lift herself back up. Her face would bruise from the impact on the rocky shore, but she didn't feel it now. She just stared, unseeingly, into the distance, drool and some foam spilled over her lips onto the rocks. She was only halfway out of the water, with her legs submerged behind her.

Her breathing slowed down, and so did her heart.

The pain in her stomach gave in to the numbness that settled over her.

She needed to swallow, but couldn't command herself to.

She couldn't make herself do anything. That should have alarmed her, but it didn't, she didn't think about it.

Instead she continued to stare and felt herself drift off, her might floating away.

* * *

"Nate!"

Nate jerked out of his bed and looked around. Someone had shouted his name, and it had sounded pretty bad. At his side, Hancock sat up more slowly, looking around.

" _Nate!_ "

"R.J.?" Nate looked around and just as he was about to go to the front door the sniper leapt over the short fence around his porch and stopped in the open doorway. Nate opened his mouth to say something, but stopped when he saw Madelyn hanging limp in MacCready's arms. "What hap p–"

"I found her by the river! She's not breathing!"

"Lay her down!" Nate rolled off the bed and Hancock sprung up, going to their first aid kit. "Why didn't you take her to the doctor?"

"To Palmer? Really?" MacCready glared at him and then looked at the girl he gently sat down.

"I don't have medical training, R.J.," Nate protested and looked to Hancock who handed him the white box and then left to get the doctor.

"I panicked, Nate," he growled and knelt beside her, brushing her dirty green hair out of her face.

He sighed and pulled out a stimpak and handed it to R.J. while he checked her breathing and then her heart. "I don't…"

"She can't be dead, Nate," he looked up at the larger man desperately.

"What… what was she doing by the river?"

"I don't know, she went to sleep before me, I heard her breathing, and when I woke up… she was gone. I just thought she was with you, but then someone said they saw a body by the river and I got worried…" he touched her face with a trembling hand. "She looks so… sick."

"Where was she?"

"By that stalled army truck."

"With the radiation barrels?" Nate started digging for radaway.

"Yeah," the sniper breathed.

"Here, help me," the General prepared the bag and MacCready held the tube while Nate connected the pieces with steady hands.

"I…" R.J. looked at his hands in disgust.

"Come on, don't worry about her, she'll be fine if we can get the radiation out of her system." The sniper nodded and followed Nate's instructions, and helped him prepare a second radaway while they hung the first on a nail in the wall above the bed.

Dr. Palmer showed up then with Hancock and Shaun behind him. "Daddy?"

"Shaun, go outside and play with Duncan," Nate ordered and the boy frowned and stomped his foot, turning away. Anger pulsed through the Sentinel at the reaction and Hancock lifted his hands to calm the larger man, and went to follow the boy. "What was that?"

"He and Duncan got in a fight last night, I was going to tell you this morning, but…" MacCready frowned, looking at Madelyn again. Palmer was wordlessly checking her, touching her in places with light fingers.

"Fight over what?"

"They're boys, and Shaun is older –bigger– he got mad at something Duncan said and pushed him," R.J. glanced at the General. Nate was trying not to read too far into his words. There was no reason to think that the ex-merc was taking a jab at his parenting.

"I don't see why he'd push Duncan," Nate frowned.

"Do you have a stimpak?" Palmer asked and R.J. handed it over. "Thank you. And some purified water?"

"Here," Nate pulled one from the first aid kit. Then he turned his attention back to MacCready, but stopped what he was about to say. The ex-gunner was focused on Madelyn, his eyes only ever leaving her for more than a second. He could talk about their sons when her condition was stabilized.

"She'll live, you got to her just in time, her heart was nearly stopped." Palmer looked between the two men. "I wish you would have brought her to me first. But another stimpak and she should wake in a few hours on her own. She should remain here, don't move her, and keep her in bed until I have a chance to check on her again."

MacCready stood up and shook the doctor's hand. "I'm sorry, I… I didn't know what to do so I brought her here."

"Next time bring her to the doctor's office you _passed_ on your way here," the doctor frowned.

MacCready's lips turned down but he nodded and knelt beside Madelyn. "Thank you, Palmer," Nate walked the doctor out. "R.J., explain, please."

"I told you," he looked up at the Sentinel. "I found her nearly dead by the water."

"No, the boys," Nate shook his head.

"Oh, they were swinging, and I guess Duncan upset Shaun when he said he swung better." MacCready sat down, holding Madelyn's hand, his eyes unable to stay on Nate for longer than a second.

"He doesn't understand the rules!" Shaun's voice echoed from the front room.

Nate stiffened and went into the living room. Hancock was sitting on the couch, leaning toward the boy so they were on a level playing field as they spoke, but Shaun was stomping his foot, making Hancock frown. "Shaun," the boy's father growled.

With wide, hazel-green eyes, he shifted his weight, "He's just a baby, and he thinks he's better than me."

"That implies you think the same," Nate came forward, standing over his son. "Where did you get the idea it was okay to push?"

There was a scratch at the door and Hancock got up to open it, letting in Dogmeat and Duncan. Shaun's eyes flicked over to the other boy and then he folded his arms over his chest, shutting everything out. Hancock rested a hand on the smaller boy's head and guided him into the bedroom to be with his dad and Madelyn.

"Shaun, look at me." He didn't, and Nate frowned deeper. "Shaun."

"What?" the boy snapped.

"Look. At. Me." The worlds were a growl, low in Nate's throat.

"Fine!" he turned on his father and glared heavily.

"Drop the attitude," the Sentinel ordered.

"I don't have an attitude!" he yelled. Anger flooded through Nate, and his hand whipped out, slapping the boy's mouth. It was a quick, short movement that provided more audio and shock than actual pain. But it was the first time he'd ever struck his son.

Shaun's hand touched his cheek and he stared up at Nate in horror, but the man continued to glare at his son in disappointment. "I should never have to do that again, do you understand me, Shaun?"

"Yes, father," he whispered, casting his eyes downward.

"Look at me," Nate ordered and the boy's hazel-green eyes slid up to meet his father's gaze. He was fighting tears, but it was a losing battle. "Why did you push Duncan?"

"He made me mad," he whispered, scared.

"Why did you think it was okay to push him?"

"I don't know–" he looked away.

"No, not 'I don't know.' Give me a reason, Shaun."

"I–I don't–I just was mad and I didn't think," he stumbled over his words, looking everywhere but at Nate's face save short flickers of eye contact to keep from getting yelled at again.

"You're going to learn that everyone makes you mad sometimes. But you cannot always hurt them," he knelt in front of him, his hand reaching out to his boy. Shaun flinched, but Nate took his shoulder gently and used his other hand to rub the sting out of his cheek. "Sometimes you can, and sometimes you have to. That's the world we live in, but you can't hurt your friends and allies just because they make you mad. That's how you lose them." Nate felt the sting of tears in his own eyes and he looked away from Shaun, standing up and pulling him into a hug. "I love you, Shaun, I'm just very disappointed that you hurt Duncan."

"I'm sorry, father…"

"I want you to apologize to both R.J. and Duncan for what you did, and then come back in here, I have to talk to John about your punishment." He heard a soft sniffle from his son and then felt him nod against his stomach.

"Okay, father…"

Nate let him go and watched him go into the bedroom to speak with the MacCready boys. John was standing by the doorway, and came forward when the boy left the room. "I never imagined you for the hitting kind of parent."

Nate frowned and looked at his hands, "Honestly… I thought I was going to do it more. Nora and I were both advocates for spanking if it worked on the child." He turned his eyes over to John and watched the ghoul lock his fingers with his. "It never worked on me when I was a child, I would just go back to whatever I was doing to get me whipped, but Nora just had to be threatened with it and she turned into an angel."

"Looks like he got more of Nora in him," the small smile he offered was honest. He meant the words, despite the thought that occurred to Nate of how that wasn't really possible. Nate squeezed the other man's hand and sighed.

"Do we ground him?"

"For pushing another kid?" one corner of John's mouth dropped and he gave Nate a half frown. "I don't know, Natie, I always thought of myself as the fun parent. Never put much thought into punishments."

Nate sat down, releasing the other man and rubbed his face, then ran his fingers through his hair. Hancock sat down next to him and rested a hand on his shoulder. "I went from an infant to a ten year old, John, I… I don't know how to…"

"Hey, hey," the ghoul's rough voice was quiet as he moved closer to his love and gently took his chin to make him look at him. "Parenting don't come with a manual, Nate. You'd've struggled if you would've raised him from birth anyway. It's just different kinds of problems."

Nate's hazy blue eyes closed as he thought. "I just don't want him to do it again. I don't want him to think it's okay to just do whatever you feel like in the moment. That'll get you killed out here."

"And it wouldn't have before the war?"

"It–" Nate forced a laugh and leaned back in the couch, looking at the ceiling. "This is a different world all together. I can't even compare the two." He met the ghoul's black eyes and touched his cheek, feeling the uneven skin beneath his thumb. "I don't want to think about that life."

"Okay," John took Nate's hand, kissed it, then held it in his lap. "I think Shaun's been punished enough this time 'round. If he does it again, then we should punish him more because he obviously didn't get the point. But I don't think he'll hurt Duncan again," the ghoul's hands squeezed Nate's.

"Yeah, I don't want to make it worse than it is now."

"I'm sorry, father," Shaun's voice came from the doorway. Nate looked up at him and opened his arm to call the boy to him. Shaun ran up and climbed into his lap, crying. "I don't like seeing you mad."

"I don't like being mad at you," Nate kissed his head and held him against his chest. John rubbed the boy's back and leaned into Nate's side.

"Just express your feelings in your words, or when you're with friends and family," Hancock advised. "Never bottle it up, but you can't let the reason you're upset control you."

"Okay, John," Shaun nodded. "I'll tell you when I get mad next time."

"Good job, kid," John rustled his hair, smiling. "What'd Duncan and MacCready say when you apologized?"

"Duncan said he was fine, and Mr. MacCready said he was proud of me," Shaun sat up so he could better see Nate.

"We should get breakfast, and bring something for them to eat, I doubt they'll leave Madelyn," Hancock said, standing.

"Yeah, we'll go get something," the Sentinel stood, holding his boy against him. It seemed to make him feel better, even though he'd previously mentioned his being too old to be carried. "Maybe we'll find Mama and see if she wants to eat with us."

"I wonder if she's seen anything in my destiny," Shaun wondered while they headed out. Dogmeat was in the bedroom, probably lying at the foot of the bed.

"R.J. do you want anything?"

"Um, just bring me whatever," the young man sighed.

Duncan shouted, "Sugar bombs, please!"

"Got it," and the General left with the Mayor of Goodneighbor to find breakfast.


	18. Dreams

_Reagan threw her last punch, sending Rhys to the ground with a heavy thud. Madelyn and Merrin smiled, cheering and clapping. "Yeah! You got him, Reagan!"_

 _The knight smiled and helped her opponent up. "You have to see that left hook coming, I swear I use it every time."_

 _"_ _Shut up," Rhys groaned, rubbing his jaw. "If I saw it, I would have dodged it."_

 _"_ _Just too good, then, huh, Logan?" Reagan elbowed him lightly, smiling wide. He rolled his eyes and threw an arm around her shoulders to pull her into his side. She growled in his face like an animal, but her smile told them it was a joke._

 _"_ _Knight, Rhys," a scribe ran up to them. His name always slipped Madelyn's mind, but she knew him well enough to associate him with his crippling awkwardness. "Paladin Danse has asked for you two."_

 _Reagan immediately pulled out of Rhys's grip and was gone without a second glance at her friends. "Bye…?" Merrin whispered and looked over at Madelyn who shrugged and glanced at a rather frustrated looking Knight Rhys._

 _"_ _You should probably go," the squire suggested and he turned a glare on her. She lifted her hands in surrender, and he departed._

 _"_ _So, just you, me, and Briars, then," Merrin smiled, looking at the other scribe._

 _"_ _Oh, I–uh– can't stay, Quinlan needs me to–uh, go on a research patrol," he explained and pulled at his collar. "I mean, not that I don't want to hang out with you guys, I'd love to –as long as you wanted me to, of course. I wouldn't just barge in and demand you let me spend time–"_

 _"_ _Briars," Merrin lifted a hand to get him to stop._

 _"_ _Sorry," he breathed and left._

 _"_ _He's an odd one," Madelyn commented and then shifted one of her belts on her stomach to a more comfortable position._

 _"_ _He's okay, just needs a backbone," Merrin shrugged and stood up. "What do you want to do?"_

 _"_ _Go on a real mission," the squire sighed and the scribe smiled back at her._

 _"_ _You'll get promoted soon, I just know it. Maxson's not that dense."_

 _"_ _I don't know, for some reason I get the feeling that he's punishing me for something I haven't done yet?" Madelyn followed her as she led the way toward the mess hall._

 _"_ _I'm sure he has a plan, he's that kinda guy," Merrin waved a hand and Madelyn nodded her agreement._

 _"_ _Maybe I'll swing by and check on him before I check in with Lancer-Captain Kells?" she looked at her friend as they stopped outside the double doors, smelling the mix of flavors from the food._

 _"_ _Give him my best then, and Reagan's, or just tell him to shave again, she likes to remind him to do that," the scribe smiled and Madelyn laughed a little._

 _"_ _Always thought it was weird she didn't ever… try to get with him?" Madelyn commented. Reagan may have loved Danse, but she had a sex drive that needed more maintenance than the Prydwen, which meant she was easily frustrated. Hence her arrangement with Rhys, and… others._

 _"_ _I think it links back to when we were squires," Merrin's brows frowned in thought. "He, uh, did something a bit embarrassing, but anyway," she waved her hands at her. "Either go or stay, make up your mind, I need to eat something."_

 _"_ _Hey there, virgins."_

 _Merrin and Madelyn both sighed in frustration and their shoulders slumped. The Lancer that approached was smiling widely, looking accomplished. "What do you want, Glass?" Madelyn frowned at him._

 _"_ _Guess who just got promoted?"_

 _"_ _Oh, congratulations, Michael," Merrin smiled and offered him a handshake. He laughed and scooped her into a hug and she stiffened, shocked by the movement. "Michael, stahp!"_

 _"_ _Oh, calm down, virgin," he laughed and looked over at Madelyn._

 _"_ _No," she lifted a finger to warn him off. "I have a knife."_

 _"_ _Squires aren't supposed to have weapons."_

 _"_ _Well this one has the Elder's permission," she snapped. He frowned._

 _"_ _How'd you get so chummy with him anyway?" his eyes narrowed. He knew that Maxson had found her, but over time she and he had publicly downplayed their relationship. "Oh god, you didn't fuck him did you?"_

 _Madelyn gagged, and turned away, "Christ."_

 _"_ _Hah, virgin," the Lancer chuckled and looked back at Merrin. "So, you gonna help me celebrate?" His wink made Merrin roll her eyes._

 _"_ _No, I'm not."_

 _"_ _Fine," he rustled her hood and passed her. "Maybe I'll just find Reagan."_

 _"_ _She's with Danse, good luck."_

 _"_ _Damn," he frowned and looked back at her with narrow eyes as if to determine if she was just saying it to get him to leave her allow. Then he shrugged and pushed both doors to the mess hall open. "Jennifer! I got some news!"_

 _"_ _Ugh, Jennifer," Merrin's eyes rolled so far back they disappeared._

 _"_ _What's wrong with Jennifer?"_

 _"_ _She's a ho," the scribe huffed and Madelyn's eyebrows jumped in surprise. Merrin never spoke that way. "Anyway, give Arthur my best, I need to eat something."_

 _"_ _Okay, Merr, see you," Madelyn gave her friend a quick hug and went off to talk to Maxson._

Madelyn opened her eyes and looked at the darkness that was Nate's bedroom. She didn't know how she'd gotten here, and she was too tired to think of an explanation, or care. When she looked around she noticed MacCready was lying beside her in the bed, asleep on his side so that he was facing her. She studied his face for a moment, taking in his features.

She had never imagined she would end up with anyone like him. The men she'd liked back at the Citadel and on the Prydwen had all been big and mean looking. Well, for the most part. Robert was different. He was lean, and didn't look like he could take too many punches before he'd be down and out for the count. But that didn't bother her, because he was quick, and smart, and he was a damn good shot. She'd know that since she met him. And honestly, she felt like she liked that more than someone who went in, guns blazing, and punching things with their power armored fists.

She wished he would join the Brotherhood. It would be so nice to see him with her on the Prydwen. And she could probably talk Maxson into letting them be in the same unit like he had Reagan and Danse.

Madelyn tried to move and touch MacCready's face, but her limbs were heavy. Instead she was stuck just watching him as he slept. "Hey," she whispered softly, her voice cracking. She wanted to see his eyes.

He woke up immediately, looing completely well rested. "You're awake," he smiled and was shifting so that he was able to look at her better. She smiled at him. "How are you feeling, Maddy?" he whispered and came closer to her, and arm draped over her so that his chest was against her side.

"I'm… just tired," she admitted and watched his face. "What… happened?"

"I was hoping you could tell me," he frowned and leaned in close to her. She closed her eyes when his forehead rested against hers. "I was… so worried, I thought…" he couldn't say the words.

"What?" she was very confused.

"You don't remember?" he pulled away to look at her and she looked up at him.

"I remember going to sleep in the bunkhouse," she shook her head. He frowned and she realized something very bad had happened. "What is it?"

"You almost died," he whispered, pain filling his face. "I found you by the water, and you weren't breathing… I brought you here." He held her face in a gentle hand and touched his forehead to hers again; she saw the tears in his closed eyes through the darkness. "I thought I'd lost you."

"I'm here," she whispered and forced herself to lift her arms and touch his bicep. It was so hard to move, and it exhausted her. "I'm alive, Robert."

"Madelyn, I love you," he whispered and kissed her cheek. It stole her breath, and she felt tears come to her eyes.

"I…" she closed her eyes and then tilted her head to get a better look at his face. "I love you, too."

He smiled at her and gently kissed her lips. It only lasted a moment, but it meant the world to her. "I don't know how you got down to the water, but I swear, I will find out who did this."

"It… could have been Rick," she breathed and he narrowed his eyes, looking angry. She didn't like that. "Please, can… we talk about something else?" She tried to touch his face, but her arm only made it to his jaw. "We… we love each other," she smiled and he refocused, nodding.

"Yeah," he smiled and kissed her cheek lightly. "You look so tired."

"I am…" she breathed and closed her eyes. "Will you hold me while I sleep?"

"I'm never letting you go," he promised and she smiled faintly. Robert tucked an arm under her pillow and settled in so that his other arm was draped across her stomach and his face rested next to hers. She tilted her head so she could kiss him. He adjusted so that she had easier access to his lips and kissed her back. "Go to sleep, love."

"Okay," she smiled, her cheeks flushing at the name. She closed her eyes and let out a long, quiet sigh, listening to him hum quietly.

 _Madelyn was lying in the bunkhouse, and opened her eyes to see Rick standing over her, his killer smile spread over his scarred lips. "Hey there, Maddy."_

 _"_ _I…" she shook her head. "No, you… you can't be here."_

 _"_ _Oh? Why's that?" he gave her a quizzical look, but smirked all the same._

 _"_ _Robert!" she rolled out of the bed and looked to see the bunks around her were empty._

 _"_ _Oh… can't find your mercenary?"_

 _She glared at Rick and stood up. "What did you do to him?"_

 _"_ _The same thing I tried to do to you," he admitted, looking annoyed that someone had foiled the plan. "It was smart… not drinking that beer. Tell me, did you know I put something on the lip? You saw my thumb, didn't you?" He frowned a little, standing up when she did._

 _"_ _I–yes, I saw it," she looked up at him._

 _He shook his head and put his hands on his hips. "Damn, I'm losing my touch. It's a good thing you're such a heavy sleeper though. I just had to sneak in here and pick you right up off that bed." He looked at the mattress._

 _She gaped at him and looked at the bed, then around at all the others. "Where are they?!" she shouted._

 _"_ _Just… look, Madelyn."_

 _She ran away from him, running down stairs to the outside. As soon as she was outside the sun turned on and she saw Sanctuary, but there was no one walking around. No one on guard duty. No one at the cooking station. No one anywhere. She ran through the streets. "Nate?!" tears filled her eyes. "Robert?! Duncan?!" the tears fell down her cheeks. "Hancock?! Anyone?!"_

 _"_ _Oh, Duncan? Who's this?" Rick's voice came from right over her shoulder and she turned to see him standing here. Dressed in his blue coat, with his black scarf around his throat, and the fedora on his head._

 _"_ _I'm not telling you if you don't already know," she growled, feeling her face flush in anger._

 _"_ _Oh, it's Mac's boy, isn't it?" She clenched her jaw and her fists balled up. "Ah, yes, that's right, tell me everything." He leaned down, putting them on the same level. She glared into his glowing blue eyes._

 _"_ _This is a nightmare."_

 _"_ _Oh," he looked hurt, but then he smiled. "No, don't think like that. I prefer… dream," he nodded and she looked passed him, seeing something in the water._

 _"_ _Oh my God…" she pushed passed him and started running again. Instantly she was at the water looking at the whole population of Sanctuary floating face down in all directions. Her jaw dropped and her lip trembled. "Robert…? Duncan…?"_

 _They were the closest to the shore with Nate and Hancock nearby. Then she saw the back of Maxson's coat. She gasped, seeing her friends and comrades in the water as well. "Oh, no this isn't right," Rick said behind her, over her right shoulder. "No… this isn't what you fear most, is it, Maddy? This is bad… but there's something worse in your eyes than_ death. _"_

 _The scene around them changed and they were back in the Capital Wasteland. No… no, they were still in the Commonwealth, they were in Sanctuary… and Sanctuary was gone, leveled in favor of a slave camp. "No…" she breathed and noticed the corals and cages that sprung up filled with faces she'd seen. "No… no," she felt the tears stream down her cheeks when Duncan's face came into view. He was being dragged away from Robert who was held by three large slavers._

 _"_ _No! Stop! I'll do anything!" he yelled at the woman pulling away his son. Madelyn saw the red light of his slave collar flash, and a sob broke through her lips._

 _"_ _Let him go!" she screamed and ran for the woman who held Duncan as he cried._

 _A man knelt down in front of them and clasped a collar around the five-year-old's neck. "No!" Robert cried out, his voice breaking. She saw the tears run down his face and he threw punches at the men holding him. Then one of them held him down and pressed a button on his collar._

 _"_ _Shouldn't have done that," the faceless man growled and then kicked MacCready away from them so that he stumbled down toward Madelyn. She stopped her run and realized she had made no progress closer to the scene. She'd been running in place._

 _When Robert came to a stop in front of her she saw how weak he was, thin, starved, and sickly. She bent to touch him, but the beeping from his collar stole her breath, and he looked at her right when it blew, popping his head like she'd seen so many other slaves' when they tried to escape or the slavers grew bored. Her heart shattered, and she fell to her knees by his lifeless body. "_ NO! _" she screamed so loud she woke up from the nightmare, hearing Rick's wicked laughter echo in her ears._

"Maddy!" Robert's voice was calming, and his touch was cool against her burning flesh. She tried to slow her breathing and realized now that her abdomen hurt. She'd sat up too fast. "Madelyn, you're okay," he pressed his forehead into her temple and she trembled, sobbing with fierce tears dripping down her cheeks.

"I–you were…" she shook her head to clear it and looked at him. She touched his face, a renewed energy in her limbs. She needed to feel him, his neck, to know there was no collar. Her fingers brushed smooth skin and soft stubble that tried to grow.

"What is it?" he whispered. She noticed it was daytime, but he had remained in bed with her, holding her just like she had asked.

"You were… dead, you had a collar," she shook her head, closing her eyes, but the image was there, so she opened them again and met his blue eyes. "A slave collar. And they blew your head off," she sobbed, and held his face, feeling his skin under her fingertips. "And they put one on Duncan and you attacked them and that's why they killed you–" she coughed and he held her, tightly against his chest. She touched it, feeling his muscles and how strong he was. He wasn't like he was in the dream. It was just a nightmare.

"Shh," he whispered and stroked her hair, brushing it from her face. "We're safe here. Nate's house is probably the safest place in the Commonwealth."

She shook her head. "No… the Prydwen is," she breathed and closed her eyes. She was so thankful Maxson hadn't been in her dream. It had hurt so bad to see just Robert and Duncan in the collars.

Robert frowned a little, "Do you want to go to the Prydwen?"

"I can't… not yet," she breathed and opened her eyes. "You'd take me?"

"Of course I would, Madelyn," he breathed and tilted his head at her. "If you wanted to go back I'd go with you."

"With me? Like, onto the ship?" she whispered.

"Well, I'm not going to let Maxson tear you a new one without making him go through me first," he smirked. She smiled at him, wide, and wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him, more tears spilling down her cheeks. He held her, pulling her into his lap. "I love you, Madelyn. I'm not letting you out of my sight again."

"I wish you'd join up," she whispered and he frowned a little. She didn't look at him then, knowing she'd ruined the mood. "I love you, too, Robert, I just want to be with you." She rested her forehead against his jaw and closed her eyes. Again the image of him standing in a flight suit with his sniper rifle over his shoulder, flashed into her mind's eye.

"Maybe… maybe I will," he said suddenly.

Madelyn's eyes snapped open and she stared at him, "Wha… really?" She blinked.

"Yeah… I mean," he shrugged, "There's obviously a reason you love them so much. Maybe they've changed."

"Robert…" she breathed, gazing at him.

"I said… maybe," he whispered. "I… don't know for sure."

"I… I can't," she held him tightly, burying her face in his neck. "That means the world to me, Robert!"

He held her and she felt him tangle his fingers in her green hair. "Love is about compromise, and the Brotherhood is your family. I can't expect to be with you without having to deal with them."

"I don't know what to say."

"Just love me back, Madelyn," he whispered. She nodded.

"Yes, always and forever."

"Just, give me some time to think about it, and… bare with me," he sighed, sounding uncomfortable.

She held his face in her hands, feeling his cool skin under her fingertips. "I'm with you." She leaned in and kissed him. He kissed her back and she pulled in closer, adjusting so she was facing him in his lap. His hands slid down her sides and she kept her arms around his neck.

Fatigue seeped into her limbs, and Madelyn sighed against his mouth, pulling away a little. He sat up straighter, holding her. "Tired?"

"I don't want to sleep… I'm afraid of what I'll dream."

"Dream of something nice," he said, his lips in her hair as he spoke. She rested her head against his chest and closed her eyes.

"Like what?"

"Like this," he rubbed her back. "Dream of me holding you. In your own room, on the Prydwen," he added. She smiled.

"You in a flight suit…" she breathed and felt him sigh. "I think you'd look nice in orange."

"Oh God," he huffed, but laughed and she smiled, letting herself relax against him. "Sleep well, love."

"Mmm." She listened to the music float in from the living room. Robert hummed along to Atom Bomb Baby, and she drifted off smiling.

 _Arthur held Madelyn's hand as they walked through the maze of tables. "I have a couple friends, they'll like you," he promised and she stumbled behind him, holding onto his hand tightly so that she wouldn't lose him. He didn't seem to notice he was walking too fast for her little legs._

 _"_ _Thank you," she breathed and tripped over herself._

 _"_ _Hey, guys!" Arthur stopped in front of a table with some very large kids around his age. "This is Madelyn Dangerfield, Lyons kinda adopted her," he informed them. There were four of them, two girls and two boys, sitting across from each other with their same gender. Madelyn looked at the boys first, as the one closest to her was very large and seemed to be the eldest of them all._

 _He had a head of brown hair shaved short on the sides, and long on top, as many soldiers seemed to have. His eyes were dark and cast into shadow from his heavy brow. His nose was thick down the center of his face with the appearance that it had already been broken at least twice, and he had downward turned lips. He only looked at her for a moment before picking up his tray and leaving._

 _This left an orange haired boy who sat much taller than the others, alone on his side of the bench. His green eyes followed the older boy, before flickering to Madelyn, and he smirked at her, wrinkling the freckles of his face. He looked nice, and his smile was kind._

 _The girls were very different from each other. The one across from the ginger boy sort of looked like a boy, but Madelyn was currently in the same state she was, with a shaved head and spare clothes, so she was able to tell the difference. She was nice enough looking, though, very shy and with downcast eyes, though. The other girl was pretty, very pretty, with big amber eyes and a mess of freckles littering her face with a focus around her nose and cheekbones. Her hair fell down to her shoulder in full brown curls._

 _"_ _That was Logan Rhys," Arthur was saying, pointing at the boy that left. "This is Michael Glass, and Reagan Knight, and Merrin Debris," he pointed them out and she gave a tiny wave._

 _"_ _That's a cool name," Reagan said with a smile while Arthur helped Madelyn climb into the bench next to Michael, where the other boy had been._

 _"_ _Th-thank you…"_

 _"_ _Lyons and I came up with it," Maxson said with a puff of pride in his chest._

 _"_ _So you didn't have a name before?" Reagan asked, her dark brows knitting together._

 _She shook her head, and Michael placed a hand on her shoulder. "Don't think you could have gotten a cooler name."_

 _"_ _Thank you," she breathed, and swallowed, looking at his green eyes. He was cute, and he knew it. He tilted his head at her and then placed a large hand on the top of her and rustled her shaved head._

 _Maxson placed some food in front of Madelyn, and she slowly took a bite. Michael removed his hand from her. When the taste of the food slide down her throat she breathed a gratitude before shoveling more food into her mouth, quickly._

 _"_ _Gonna give Merr a run for her money," he commented, and Madelyn looked at the other girl confused. "So far you look and act alike. Gonna have to see who makes the cuter Brahmin."_

 _Reagan giggled, and Merrin's eyebrows shifted in a mix of jealousy and confusion as if she didn't know if she should be offended or not. Arthur frowned. "Don't call her that, she's been practically starved, of course she's not going to have table manners."_

 _Reagan breathed through her lips, making a funny noise. "He's just messing."_

 _"_ _Thank you," Madelyn whispered, unable to say anything else. She didn't think she'd ever stop saying those two little words. After everything the Brotherhood had done for her, she'd never be able to repay them._


	19. Thank You All!

**I just wanted to thank everyone who's been reading! The comments are always a welcome sight! I am sorry that few of you don't like Hancock and Nate's relationship, but I hope that there are some who enjoy it as I do.**

 **The reason I have them how they are is actually based on a play through where my character (Capricorn) ended up really favoring Hancock, which was odd since I always personally preferred Paladin Danse. Capricorn's charisma wasn't high enough to save Danse, so he couldn't talk him out of it, and he killed him. It tore me apart, just as I thought it would Capricorn as well. After that he tried to run with MacCready (of whom is my second favorite companion) and they seemed to butt heads a lot. Then along came this colonial ghoul, and Capricorn took an immediate liking. I think it was from the underlying feeling that he would have loved Danse even though he was a synth, and didn't see a problem, now he had a similar situation with a ghoul. A personality and person he could really get along with, but** ** _being_** **something was supposed to keep them apart.**

 **I honestly wish I liked the female companions more. Maybe it's because I'm a girl, or they just don't interest me as much, but each has quirks that just didn't really go with how I played Capricorn. And since I used Cap for this story as a physical and play through representation of Nate, that meant he didn't really care for the female companions that way. Cap also hasn't done a lot of quests which is why he hasn't found Curie or Cait. Cait seemed a bit harsh for him, though, and Curie, as sweet as she is, seemed to be a little too good.**

 **If you can bare with me, you'll be rewarded with eventual Mac x Maddy action. If it wasn't for one of my roommates they would have already done the** ** _thing_** **, but my roommate brought to my attention that I move a lot faster in relationships than normal people do, and felt that was quite fast for Maddy who'd never had this before. SO, I have to let my own sexual frustrations out somehow, and THAT is probably why Nate and Hancock get into it every three chapters or so. But I'm kinda digging the slow and steady with them (but I have no idea at what point people reach these relationship checkpoints, as my husband and I only were dating a mere weeks before we said we loved each other, kissed the same day, and started messing around once we were engaged a year later, and got married the same year we got engaged.) Obviously Mac and Maddy are in a total different situation and Mac would be more comfortable moving faster than her.**

 **The decision to make Hancock and Nate what they are also is rooted in how Mac and Maddy will be. I hate relationships in books that break up and get back together all the time, and I wanted AT LEAST ONE relationship that wouldn't go anywhere ( _This doesn't mean Mac and Maddy will be that couple, I was just expressing my personal want–this also doesn't mean that they won't be that couple, who knows? Not me, I'm only writing down what these guys do, I have almost no control over what happens)_. So I gave Nate the strong relationship. He deserves it after everything he's been through. And since I try to be realistic with my writing, I couldn't give him the perfect family, hence Shaun acting out. **

**In case you care, Shaun's outbursts are based on my brother-in-law who just turned 12. He acts how I've presented Shaun. He's not a bad kid, but he's no angel. I hope to do more developing with him, but he's not a main character (I feel like a horrible person, but honestly Duncan is higher on my totem pole than Shaun).**

 **I have some twists and turns coming up. I love, love, love! Fan theories. I actually feed off them; one of my roommates helped me perfect the idea I was rolling with for these people-snatchers. So if you have any thoughts, PLEASE tell me, I may like what you have better than what I was planning!**

 **And as I write I find that sometimes things don't add up or I change how something happens, so if you're just reading as they're updated, you may not notice the changes to previous chapters I've made. Once I've brought this story to an end, I think I will repost it with completed edits.**

 **On another note!**

 **I have SEVERAL other stories I'm working on and am considering posting, but I don't know for SURE if I should quite yet. So I was hoping for some opinions. Here are the other works I'm running with also:**

 **–An AU of The Sentinel's Squire where Nora lived instead of Nate (This also has an option of Kellogg not being killed and joining up with Nora, but it's not cannon yet and I wanted to see how people would feel about that). Instead of picking up after everything I wanted to run her though and see for myself how she would do the main quest line. Nora isn't based on a play through like Nate was, so she has more... freedoms? I don't know what word I'm looking for, but she's less likely to be as... stiff(?) as Nate can be. She also suffers from more flashbacks than he does, so if I do do this you can see what Nate was like Prewar, which could be really interesting if you like him enough. This means that a lot of things don't happen or happen very differently, though, like Madelyn and MacCready never becoming a thing IF they meet at all. I've had a lot of fun seeing how much Nora can change the Commonwealth compared to Nate.**

 **–The Wastelander Rowan from some chapters back with the abusive boyfriend, Chad, taking a trip to Nuka World a year after the interaction she has in Sanctuary and becomes Overboss. Needless to say, Gage isn't a fan of Chad, and shit goes down. Rowan without Chad is QUITE the badass, but she has been under his thumb for YEARS, and even when she thinks she's shaken him, he keeps coming back somehow and ruins shit for her. This one takes place in the same universe as TSS and will probably reference things that happen in it to make it feel more real.**

 **–Knight Reagan Knight of the Brotherhood of Steel. It would take place during the same time as The Sentinel's Squire, and include the part of this piece where she meets up with Nate, but would include her time at Danse's grave and her conversation with Mac. This piece leaves the Commonwealth though, and I venture into the Midwest where I and one of my roommates have tried to build up the Midwest Brotherhood of Steel. This work is long, as the plot doesn't kick in until they're in the Midwest and I started it when Reagan came to the Prydwen only a month or so before she spoke with Nate. (This one is from First Person point of view and jumps between her and Dire Dangerfield [not related to** **Madelyn but the reference is made] who is son of the Elder of the Midwest, and an Inquisitor. Ooh, such fun with this story)**

 **–And lastly a piece I've been thinking about running is a Reagan and Danse story that would take place in the AU with Nora as Nora will no kill Danse like Nate did. The two of them would, obviously, not be apart of the Brotherhood, but I could see them doing a lot of the quests that Nate and even Nora never get around to, (Silver Shroud for one, I know she could talk Dansey into wearing that Grognak costume). But I haven't started this one yet, not officially at least.**

 **If any of those sound interesting, please let me know! I LOVE writing, and I do it a bit more than I probably should... (My grades? Oh, I'm only failing one and a half classes...)**

 **I hope this was a nice read for you, thank you for sticking around this long! I am so happy that I have written something that people seem to enjoy! It's why I write! I just want you to know how much this really means to me, and I hope the above information helps you understand the thoughts behind The Sentinel's Squire! If you have any questions you can totally PM me, and if it's not a spoiler I'll try to answer.**

 **Enjoy! And Merry December! Any and all beliefs celebrated this month! I'm going to be celebrating my 21st birthday next week as well as have several papers and presentations due, so I don't know when the next post will be, so I wanted to get this one out there!**

 **~Nekkra Mancey**


	20. Decisions

Nate ran his finger along the back of Hancock's hand, meeting his black eyes. The ghoul let out a puff of smoke, blowing it away from the General. "Thanks, Natie, I needed this," he whispered, and flicked the cigarette so that the ash fell onto the ground.

"You haven't had one in a while," he shrugged and relaxed into the bench to watch Shaun play with Nat on the geo-dome. They were getting along well. Surprisingly well in fact. Nate wondered what Shaun was thinking as he smiled widely at the girl, leaning in as he listened to her speak.

"I know you don't like me doing it," John said, bringing Nate back into the conversation before he could let his thoughts get too deep.

He took a deep breath and sighed a little, "I don't mind as much when it's outside and not often. One or less a day is fine, really." He'd gotten used to the habit, he knew it wasn't something a lot of people could just kick, and honestly he didn't know if lung cancer could affect a ghoul. So he really had nothing other than preference to keep John from doing it. He didn't think it was fair to tell him he wasn't allowed to.

"I can do that," he promised and grabbed Nate's hand, interlocking their fingers, "For you."

"Thank you, John, that means a lot," he whispered. Nate returned his attention to the kids on the playground. He wondered how Madelyn was doing. When he and John had decided to bring Shaun down here he stopped in to check on her and MacCready. Apparently she'd woken up a few times, but she was sleeping a lot. Duncan had rejoined them and was playing with her hair and talking to R.J. about his comic books.

"Can… I ask you something?" Hancock asked suddenly, and Nate blinked, looking over at him.

"Yeah, of course, John."

"Will you let someone else take the lead on this investigation?" The ghoul was avoiding eye contact, watching the smoke trail up from his cigarette.

"Why do you want me to do that?" Nate took the man's chin lightly and tilted his head so he had to meet his gaze.

"I have a real bad feeling about this is all, I…" Hancock frowned, showing his concern. "I don't want something to happen to you."

"Every time we leave on missions there's the threat of something happening to me," he let his thumb brush the ghoul's lips, drawing his eyes down before returning them to his black orbs. "As long as I have you with me I'll be fine, have so far right?"

"Okay," he smiled a little, nodding, "Guess that's the best way I can make sure nothing happens."

"I wouldn't want anyone else watching my back," Nate breathed, his thumb brushing the wedding band on Hancock's finger. John sighed, finishing his cigarette and pressing the bud into the metal arm of the bench to stifle the burn before flicking the bud behind him.

"I just want to make sure you get to enjoy your retirement. Shaun will be grateful for the time," he explained and Nate nodded his understanding and agreement.

"I want nothing but to spend time with you two."

Shaun's cry surprised Nate and he turned around to look at his son who was sitting on the ground, holding his cheek, gaping up at Nat. "What was that?!"

"You can't just kiss me!"

"Oh no," Nate and Hancock both breathed and stood up to go to settle things before the girl threw another punch.

* * *

"I'm fine," Madelyn whispered and stood up, pushing against the bed and wall to give herself the leverage. MacCready stood beside her ready to catch her if something happened, but he gave her the chance to do it alone. "I'd say I've had worse, but that'd be a lie…."

Nate smirked, "Yeah, don't need you to start lying to me. I thought we had a good thing going."

Madelyn stumbled and both Nate and R.J. reached for her. Nate stopped, though, allowing the ex-mercenary to catch her under her elbows and stabilize her. He gave her a meaningful look she frowned at and Nate felt like he'd missed something.

"I think you need another day," the sniper said before Nate could speak up.

"We've lost contact with Trudy's diner," John spoke flatly, and both Madelyn and MacCready frowned.

"We don't have time," the squire breathed, "We need to get going and find out who is doing this."

"You're in no condition, Madelyn," Nate decided. "I'm going to go with John and some others and see if we can pick up a trail. I don't want us to go in groups of smaller than three. Last thing we need is someone to get caught alone and not having backup."

Hancock nodded his agreement and gave Madelyn's hair a quick rustle, "We'll be leaving in the morning. I assume you'll be sticking by her side, MacCready?"

"Always," he said easily, his hooded eyes trained on the girl with short breaks to look at the others. He was exhausted, probably hadn't slept the whole time Madelyn had been out. This would give him time to recuperate.

"I wish you'd take me," she said, her grey gaze meeting Nate's sky blue one. "I need to keep up my training if I'm going to get promoted."

"I haven't forgotten, Squire Dangerfield," he smiled, lying only a little. He hadn't forgotten she was his squire, at least, not really. He just didn't like the idea of treating her like a soldier all the time. He thought of her like family now. That meant he wanted to protect her, though, instead of lead her into danger.

"I love being out here with you, Sentinel, but I… I've been waiting for this promotion for too long," she explained, absently holding onto MacCready's jacket now for stability.

"Why hasn't Maxson let you get promoted? You obviously are talented," Hancock asked. "He's not that big a tool is he?"

Madelyn frowned at the name and Nate's brows tugged together, she looked like she wanted to comment, but she stopped herself. After a moment, she wet her lips and said, "To be fair, no squire's been promoted to knight before turning eighteen. As far as the Brotherhood knows I'm sixteen." She sighed, scrunching her nose, "I could see if he would allow me to become an Initiate since that rank is open to recruits fifteen and up, but squires get more perks."

"Like what?" MacCready asked suddenly, and she glanced at him.

"Oh, uh, Initiates generally get the short end of the stick when it comes to chores on the Prydwen, while squires are expected to do more menial tasks. This gives me more free time to study, and practice my combat skills. If I was an Initiate I would also be put on watch, and I can't stand standing around watching people be idiots," she added with a frown. "At least if I was a knight on watch I would have _some_ respect. Initiates are even lower on the social totem pole than squires."

"Wow, sounds rough," Hancock frowned and Nate noticed MacCready's brows were furrowed. He wondered why the sniper was interested in the Brotherhood's expectations.

"I'm sure I'd get over it," she shrugged. "I just… I had a plan, you know? And I like when my plans… follow through."

"I understand, Maddy, but you can't get promoted if you're dead, and that's more likely to happen if you're not at your strongest," Nate explained.

"Okay," she relented and sighed. "I'll stay here."

"Good," the Sentinel patted her green head and she sighed, sitting down from exhaustion. "Get some rest. Both of you." He gave MacCready a pointed look. "You can stay here," he gestured to the bed.

"Thank you," R.J. said and Nate nodded.

"Ad Victoriam, Sentinel," Madelyn said and stood just long enough to salute him, her fist over her chest. He hadn't seen the gesture in so long it looked strange on her. She wasn't wearing anything remotely Brotherhood and with her green hair, no one could know she belonged to them.

"Get well, Squire," he ordered and saluted her back with the strongest snap he'd presented. His heels clicked together, and his back was straight, broadening his shoulders with a puff in his chest as his fist came to rest over his heart. She gazed at him with a comforted smile. She had needed to see him do this, he realized. The Brotherhood was her safety net, and after everything she'd been through, each little piece of it meant the world to her. An idea swam in his head, and he smiled at her. "Good night, Madelyn."

"Night, Nate."

* * *

"I think it's a good idea," John sighed, sitting down on the mattress beside Nate's. He had never slept in the bunkhouse. It took everything within him not to push his bed to the ghoul's so they could sleep like they did at home. Hancock could tell Nate wanted to be closer, so he patted the spot at his side and the General immediately switched beds. Shaun was already asleep on the other side of the room, having wanted some alone time after his embarrassment on the playground.

"Maddy would make a good knight," Nate said and John nodded, working the buttons open on the flannel the General wore. They weren't going to do anything, not here in the open where someone could just walk in and interrupt… or watch. Nate shuddered at the idea of someone watching him and John.

"She's young though," Hancock frowned, not wanting to use that excuse. It was a factor that would be brought up, no matter the relevance.

"She is, but she's smart. And I doubt she would be thrust right into battle. She would be trained with them, live weapons and the like," he waved a hand and then allowed John to removed the shirt from him. There was no one but Shaun on this level of the bunkhouse. The number of visitors had slowed down now that winter was coming.

"I know… I'm just being protective. I want the best for her." They both were feeling the affects.

"I do also. I think it would be good for her, though, if not just to see the Prydwen again. She's been away from it for… a month?" Nate lifted an eyebrow. How long had it been? It felt like longer, he felt like he'd had Madelyn with him since he left the Vault. But at the same time, he felt like he'd just picked her up yesterday. He remembered how he had assumed she would be annoying and childish. How wrong she'd made him.

"Yeah, about so, maybe a little longer," John sighed and smirked. "She was so cute in that squire's uniform and that switchblade."

"Tooth was a good gift for her, she could take out a Deathclaw with a well placed strike," Nate breathed and rested his head against Hancock's shoulder.

"She's come a long way in a short time."

"Then it's agreed, when we get back I'll make a trip to the Prydwen with her. I'll give Maxson an update in person, and explain our issue out here as well. I know he'll give us aid if only we can get more concrete information on what we're looking for."

"I'm behind you, no matter what," John said. Nate nodded and kissed the man's neck, then his shoulder, and rolled over into the bed, lightly tugging his lover down to settle into his arms on the thin bed. "What about MacCready?"

"I'll let him come if he wants to. He's not a fan of the Brotherhood so I imagine he'll sit this one out."

"Yeah, but… they seem a bit inseparable," John commented and Nate frowned in agreement. They were in the early stage of a strong relationship, he knew they could make it work, but they would also need to be able to separate and work fine apart. Especially if MacCready wasn't going to join the Brotherhood and remain close to her. Nate couldn't think of a time when he was lower ranked and able to see anyone other than Danse unless they were running missions. Civilians weren't really… allowed on the Prydwen, not unless it was for a short, guided visit. Of course now he had all the time in the world, and he was able to do pretty much whatever, so bringing MacCready with wouldn't be too difficult.

"If he wants he can come," he repeated and sighed. "I don't know what I'm going to say to Maxson. 'Hey, this is my friend MacCready. He's an ex-gunner and mercenary, but he's a Minuteman now, so it's okay. He's also dating Maddy and oh, he has a five-year-old son.' That will probably get him shot."

"Well, good thing he's so skinny, makes him a harder target."

"Not as skinny as you," Nate smirked, his hand running down the ghoul's side.

"Hah, some would call me 'sickly thin'."

"I like to think it gives you a sexy King of the Zombies look," the Sentinel smirked.

"Good night, Natie," he chuckled, kissing the scruff of the other man before closing his eyes.

"Night, John," the larger man nuzzled his face under the ghoul's chin and relaxed, allowing sleep to take over.


	21. Oh, look, Porn!

**What?! Two chapters in one night? You're welcome. (Because fuck homework and my shitty grades)**

* * *

Hancock and Nate were already gone by the time Madelyn woke up. It had to be only an hour or two before noon. At her side MacCready was snoring lightly, and she smiled at him, watching his relaxed face contort slightly in dream. Faintly she wondered what was going through his mind. He'd never shared his dreams with her.

Deciding not to wake him, she stayed put. Duncan wasn't in the room, which surprised her. The door to the balcony was closed –something that didn't happen often in Nate's house– so she couldn't see outside to know if he was in the playground. A small swell of worry filtered into her heart until a wet nose touched her hand. "Hey there, Dogmeat, you got left behind too?" her voice was a very low whisper.

He whined a little and licked her fingers.

"I'll get up and play with you when Robert wakes up," she said and rubbed his ear. He seemed to smile and then jumped onto the beds, shaking them and startling the sniper up right. "Damn it, Dogmeat," she sighed and met wide blue eyes.

"Oh, just the dog," he sighed and rubbed his face roughly to work the sleep out of it.

"You can go back to sleep," she whispered and inched closer to him. His arm caught her and pulled her into his side over the space between the beds.

"Nah, I'm awake," he said, his voice thick.

"Okay," she rested her head on his shoulder and he closed his eyes a moment. He looked like he was trying to force the rest of his body to wake up now. "What'd you dream about?"

"Uh," his features scrunched in thought. "Ah, Little Lamplight."

"Oh," her eyebrows perked. "What about it?"

"My time there. When I was mayor," he shrugged and used his free hand to rub his still closed eyes. "When I got sick."

"Sick?"

"Yeah," he breathed and opened his mouth running a finger along his teeth. She'd noticed them before but had never really looked twice at them, but now that he was showing them off, she looked at them closer. He had a few that were missing completely and a lot that had holes or looked pretty rough. She just figured it was part of living out in the Commonwealth. When she was in the slaver's camps she'd seen many people with even worse mouths than him, and even in the Brotherhood there were some soldiers that could make Robert's mouth look desirable. "When I was a kid I got rickets. I didn't get it nearly as bad as some of the kids, but it softened my bones a bit and," he shrugged. "I guess the food we ate there was also pretty bad for our teeth."

"So you dreamed about when you were sick?"

"Yeah, I managed to evade rickets for a while. Something changed when I…" he frowned a little to himself. "I let this woman in. She was a mungo, but she was… different than the others. Only like, eighteen, so I figured she'd be fine, and she helped save some of our missing kids," he added.

"Why'd she want in?"

"She wanted to get to the Super Mutant infested Vault, but the only way I knew how to get there was through Little Lamplight. She really, _really_ wanted through, so she did everything I made her, and eventually I just… let her in."

"Was she… good?" Madelyn raised an eyebrow.

"Oh yeah, she helped around, gave us some food that wasn't fungus," he smirked. "No one would eat it so I called them all pussies and took it for myself." She smiled a little and he continued, "Anyway, she left and didn't come back. I mean, I had to leave four years after that happened, so I guess she could have come back, but I'm not sure if they would have let her in without me there."

The way he looked at his hands he seemed to have a strong opinion of her, "Did it upset you she didn't come back?"

He blinked, glancing at her, "Uh, I mean, a little. She promised to come back, and didn't. She could be dead for all I know."

"What was she like?"

"Well, she was with the Brotherhood, but I didn't know much about them then so I didn't really care. Her name was Alice, and she was… pretty plain looking. I mean, short dull brown hair and real dark eyes." He waved a hand across his face when he said, "Freckles, lots of them. She wasn't… _pretty_ , but she was nice. Funny, too. I was a little shit, and she never seemed to let it affect her, in fact, she threw it right back at me a few times." He laughed suddenly, "Said my face looked like her butt."

Madelyn smiled and let out a short laugh of surprise, "What'd you say?"

"She must enjoy having such a cute butt," he said easily. That made Madelyn laugh and he looked at her.

"She was from a Vault and was looking for her dad. I don't know what ended up happening but she… she helped us a lot, and I'll always remember her."

"I bet she's alive out there," she gestured to the door.

"Probably." Then he shrugged, "Anyway, my dream was just kinda me laying there, staring at the rocky ceiling while Lucy worked on me."

"Your wife Lucy?"

"No, no, different one," he shook his head. "Lucy was a doctor in Little Lamplight. Probably the smartest person in the world honestly. At eleven she was doing major surgery and making 'compounds' and–" he shook his head still bewildered by the woman. "Oh no, I could never have married her. She was _way_ too smart, and honestly, I think I annoyed her to hell and back."

Madelyn smiled, taking hold of the hand he had around her shoulders. "I don't think you're annoying."

"Hah, I'd hope not, I'm not even trying. I tried with her, and I think that was the problem," he smirked. "No… I met my wife Lucy after Little Lamplight."

His smile faded and she touched his jaw, "You don't have to tell me."

He looked at her and saw the want in her eyes. She was curious but she wouldn't intrude or make him uncomfortable. "No, it's okay. She and I met shortly after I'd left Little Lamplight." He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "It took me about a year to find out that I wasn't going to get shi–" he grunted and started over. "I wasn't going to get anywhere without my rifle in the Capital, so I started taking jobs as a hired gun. Not many people were interested, obviously, since I was seventeen. But when they saw me shoot, a lot changed their minds. I still had a bad attitude and foul mouth, so I think that helped people take me seriously." He opened his eyes and looked at her. "I met Lucy on a job. I was supposed to kill her dad. He'd… pissed some guy off down stream. I couldn't do it, not when I saw it was just him and her." He ran a hand through her green hair and his lips frowned deeply. "You and her look a lot alike, but I can see every difference. You're stronger than she was. I loved her, but… I had to do all the protecting and… it got her killed," he looked away. Madelyn wrapped her arms around him her forehead against his temple. She had to get onto her knees for it to be comfortable, though. "I never told her I was a hired gun or that I was sent to kill her dad. I told her I was a soldier because I was afraid of what she'd think of me."

"I can't tell you how she would have felt," Madelyn said honestly, "But if she truly loved you she would have forgiven you after some time at least."

He tilted his head toward her and she kissed his cheek. "We had Duncan right after we got married. I was… almost nineteen." His breathing was coming in short huffs. "She was a year younger than me. We traveled a bit, came to the Commonwealth. She loved Diamond City, and we spent a lot of time in the Dugout Inn. Pretty sure that's where Duncan was…" he coughed, and she smirked a little. "Anyway, she had Duncan here in the Commonwealth, and we were on our way back to the Capital when… we stopped in the subway tunnel…" his breathing picked up.

"It's okay, Robert."

"Yeah, Duncan was just… so little, and he wouldn't stop crying. I had to beg for milk for him," his face flushed and he looked down in shame.

"And he's alive, and so are you," she whispered, running her fingers through his hair.

"If it wouldn't have been for Nate getting Duncan that cure… I–" he stopped and his jaw clenched. "I don't know how many times I kissed the barrel of my rifle." This surprised her and she felt her own tears swell in her eyes.

"You… don't still…?" she whispered and he looked at her suddenly.

"No, no, Madelyn, I haven't thought about ending it in…" he shook his head and held her. "How could I? I have you and Duncan, I couldn't leave you two."

"Good," she said into his hair and tried to steady her breathing. "I don't want to lose you." Her arms around him were tight and he pulled her into his lap.

"I'm not going anywhere."

She nodded and ran her fingers along his pointed jaw. He gazed down at her and she smiled. "I love you."

"I love you."

Her cheeks flushed and she let her thumb brush his lips. "I wanna kiss…" she said sheepishly and he flashed a smile. With a hand at the back of her head he lifted her to him and she wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him deeply. He kissed her back with a need she had yet to experience. His other hand moved along her shoulder to her side until it reached her hip. She moved around in his lap so she was facing him better, breaking the kiss just long enough to breath. Then she gently pushed him down onto the bed and straddled him.

"Careful," he breathed against her lips. She didn't know what he meant by that until she felt his waist grind against her and she felt something hard rub her.

Surprised she jerked away and he chuckled. "Oh, I'm sorry," she flushed brightly. "I didn't mean to…"

"Didn't mean to what?"

"Make you…" she glanced down between them. She was on her hands and knees above him and he lied on the bed, relaxed.

"It's gonna happen pretty much every time we kiss, love, 'specially when you get this into it," he touched her cheek. She met his gaze then looked down at the tent in his pants. It looked pretty hard, like it was pushing against his belt with some force. "You've never seen a guy excited have you?"

"Well, I mean, I have see… people…." She bit her lip, "I've walked in on stuff happening. And Reagan's talked about it… a lot." She flushed and looked back down at him.

"Never had someone get hard for you then," he corrected and she shook her head. "Does it bother you?"

Madelyn glanced at him and shook her head. "Does it… hurt?"

"Not at the moment," he said honestly. "It would feel better if it wasn't caged up, but I'm not going to complain. We aren't gonna do anything with it today."

"I'm sorry," she frowned, embarrassed.

"Why?" he sat up, sliding so that his legs were under her waist now.

"You… want to," she gestured to the awkward fold in his pants.

"Madelyn, I told you. We won't do anything you don't want to. I've…" he frowned a little. "I can wait."

"Have you… done stuff… since Lucy?"

His cheeks went a little pink. "Yeah, but it never meant anything."

"Oh."

He caught her face in his hands, "And I want our first time to mean the world to you."

"It'll be my first time," she added.

"So you'll take the lead. We go as slow, and gently as you want, and if you want to stop at any time we do. No matter my desire. I'm just going to be happy to be with you." Then he kissed her forehead. "And before you can say it, yes, I'm okay if you never want to."

"I don't know about never," she said and her cheeks went bright red. She could feel the heat between her legs when she looked down at his crotch. She imagined what it looked like, and her mouth went dry.

"Mmm," he hummed and she met his gaze. "I…" he shook his head and released her to lean back against the wall.

"You want to…" she whispered. Her hand ghosted over his lap, brushing the stiffness.

"I'm not going to make you or stop you," he stated, watching her carefully. "I just want you to be ready."

"How will I know if I'm ready?" she asked. Her heart pounded against her chest.

"You'll know, love," he promised. She came closer to him and sat in his lap. He shifted her, his hands grabbing at her ass briefly, so that he could adjust himself under her. She liked feeling him touch her.

"How does it feel?" she asked now that they were comfortable.

He rolled his hips and she felt him press against her, rubbing her in a way that took her breath away. "Pretty damn good," he answered.

She couldn't breath correctly. Her hands rested on his shoulders and his were on her hips, ready for whatever she decided. "I… want to," she whispered, "But I'm nervous."

He nodded, "You will be your first time."

"Okay," she breathed and looked down between them.

"Hey," he caught her attention. "I love you, Madelyn Alexandria Dangerfield."

"I love you, too, Robert Joseph MacCready," she leaned in and kissed him. One of his hands came up to hold her face to his, and his other remained on her hip, his thumb slipping under her shirt. Her breathing picked up and she made herself hold his jaw with one hand while the other slid down his front, opening his green jacket as his brown one had already been discarded.

"Just tell me when you want to stop," he tore his mouth from hers to trail kisses down her neck. She swallowed and moaned at the feeling of his scruff tickling at her throat.

"Okay," she said absently and leaned her head back so he had better access. The hand on her neck shifted down to her shirt. It slid down the side, and he let his thumb brush her breast. She enjoyed it, and let out a sigh.

When his hands were at the bottom of her shirt, she let his fingers dive below it and touch her bare skin. Slowly, he worked it up, his hands flat against her virgin skin. She pulled away from him to sit straight, watching him work his hands up, the shirt forced to follow. When he reached her breasts he paused and waited for her. She nodded and he lifted the shirt over them. Her bra held her breasts up so they looked more full than they really were. She suddenly hoped he wouldn't mind her size. By the way he gazed at her, he didn't. His hands stopped rising in favor of running over her stomach, feeling how smooth her skin was.

Callus made his touch rough but she liked how it felt. And when he leaned in to begin kissing her, she liked it even more. Gently he lifted her so he could get onto his knees in front of her.

The sniper removed her shirt the rest of the way and kissed her mouth, then her jaw, then down her neck until he was low enough his chin brushed her bra. He glanced up at her and she nodded shakily. Instead, he continued down, bending so that he kissed her stomach now, down to her belt. Then he came back up and kissed her lips. "That was…" she couldn't think of a word. He smiled.

Madelyn reached up and worked him out of his coat. When it was tossed to the side, Dogmeat got up and left the bed. Neither noticed. Instead she took the hem of his tank top and lifted it to expose his chest. He was lean muscle and bone, but she liked what she saw in him.

Allowing her to gaze at him, he turned his own belt loose, but left it where it was, and did the same to hers. She glanced down then, and waited for him to do whatever it was he was going to. Robert's hands moved lightly and slowly, allowing her all the time to stop him as he freed the button and then pushed her pants down, leaving her in her underwear. She helped him get them passed her knees and watched them hit the ground.

Now she was in just the off white under clothing that hadn't been washed in God knows how long. She resisted covering herself as he looked her over. His blue eyes soft, kind, and loving, as his fingers trailed down over her skin. She shuddered and suddenly felt the cool air around her. "Do you want to keep going?" he asked. She nodded without hesitating.

He came closer then, his chest pressed against hers. She looked him at him, her face only just coming to his neck here when they were both on their knees. "I want this," she promised and he nodded.

"Just tell me when to stop."

"I will," she nodded. She knew he was just making sure, but it was almost making her more nervous.

Her thoughts drifted away when he kissed her, his mouth skilled on hers, and she tried to keep her breathing even. That was impossible though, his kisses moved and drew out groans from her, and before she knew it she was on her back and he was touching her all over. He'd worked himself out of the last of his clothes without her noticing, and when he came back to kiss her mouth she felt his hot chest against hers. She was cold for some reason, she wanted to blame it on the air and her nerves.

Madelyn felt his erection on her thigh and realized then he wasn't dressed anymore. Her heart leapt and picked up double time. She didn't know what to do, so she just lied still and kissed him back. His hands slid behind her and she felt him unclasp her bra with a little thought. She wouldn't say the action was practiced, but it wasn't too difficult to unhook a bra.

When she was freed from the fabric, she looked down and so did he. She frowned at how they slid to the side and looked ever smaller than they were. Robert, on the other hand, bowed his head and kissed them, his hand cupping the opposite one. Her breath left her and she watched him carefully.

If he was disappointed he didn't show it in the least bit. If anything, he looked pleased. His face buried itself between her breasts, sucking and biting on her sternum summoning up pleasured noises from her.

"That…" she whispered and closed her eyes, arching her back slightly. Robert breathed deeply and moved his mouth to her nipple and began suckling on it. She gasped and watched him. He paused to see if he was hurting her, then continued. While he did this, his fingers pinched and twisted the other. "Oh," she breathed, never having felt this before.

The heat between her legs was spreading through her, and now his touch was starting to feel cool. She shuddered when he switched breasts, giving them equal attention. While he did this she felt his hips moving gently. He was rubbing himself against her leg. She breathed, slowly, listening to the radio in the front room faintly playing Sixty-Minute Man.

"That felt amazing," she whispered when he started to kiss her lower.

"I hoped so," he breathed, his eyes on hers. After drawing circles around her belly button with the tip of his tongue, he slid farther down and paused, his face now between her legs. She stared down at him.

"I…" she felt uncomfortable. No one had been down there. No one but other girls in the showers had seen that part of her. Ever.

"I can stop, Madelyn."

"I just… don't know if it's…" she flushed, not sure what she wanted to say. "I'm sorry," she decided.

"Why?" he looked confused.

"I… it's…" she frowned.

"You're perfect," he promised and leaned in, his nose brushing her thigh. She held her breath. He smiled when he smelled her, then moved her last piece of clothing away so he could see her. "Nothing to worry about," he looked up at her with a smirk. "You're definitely a woman."

She flushed and looked away. "Thanks."

"What? Madelyn, they all are pretty much the same down here. Some are nicer looking, but that's generally because they don't get used all the time. You're a virgin, so you're…" he trailed off and she felt his finger part her lips. Her eyes snapped wide and she looked down at him. "Yours is as pretty as one can get."

Her face was red and she finally nodded at his words.

"Do you want me to keep going?" he asked.

"Yes," she nodded.

"Okay, love," he breathed and leaned in, kissing her sex. She gasped and jerked at the feeling, but he didn't let her escape from him. His tongue lapped at the juices that flowed out of her, while one of his hands rubbed her thigh and the other held her underwear out of his way.

Madelyn moaned and her back arched when he sucked on her clit, and she sat up, unable to think of anything else to do. She watched him, and then he pulled away. "I… I don't know what I should do," she told him and he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand before leaning in and kissing her.

"Just relax and let me do this, okay?" he pressed his forehead to hers and she nodded. "Tell me when something feels good, or if it doesn't."

"Okay," she nodded. He took her underwear off and shifted her around so she was comfortable on the bed and he settled back down between her legs.

It didn't take long for her to realize what he was doing. She'd heard Reagan talk about a 'release' or 'coming' but she'd never thought about how it would feel. Reagan said she never let anyone make her finish. She was saving that for Danse she she'd not waited in anything else. For a brief moment she wondered what her friend would do now.

Robert's tongue was driving her right for whatever this release was. She could feel it coiling in her, tightening up her muscles. "That's," she panted, unable to do anything but nod now as he mouthed her sex and worked a finger in her. "I'm…" she arched her back and felt the heat taking over.

"That's right, love," he whispered into her thigh and bit her. She gasped and felt the release. She couldn't do anything but let it happen. She couldn't even speak. Robert, on the other hand, worked her through the feeling, his fingers still inside her and his mouth sucking on her, going between her inner thigh and her clit.

"Oh that was…" she said breathlessly and looked down at him as he smiled proudly.

"Good," he shifted and came up to kiss her. She could taste herself all over him, but tried to ignore it. Now that he was here she could feel him still very hard against her thigh.

She had an aching between her legs she didn't understand and shifted a little, trying to get him closer. He chuckled. "What?" she asked, pulling away from his kiss.

His mouth fell to her neck and he shook his head, holding her. "So eager for this."

"I… I don't know, it just…" she breathed, arching her back as he moved to her breasts again. They were so sensitive. She had to close her eyes, and bit on her finger.

"I'll keep going then," he said and she felt him rub against her thigh again. Her mouth was dry from being the primary source of air to her lungs.

"Please do," she whispered.

He wiped off his face with a hand and then came back up to keep his face close her hers. "It's going to hurt a little. You're very… tight," he said and she nodded her understanding. Her being tight with him being… thick, obviously, meant something had to give, and it was easier for her to stretch. And that meant pain.

Suddenly she was scared.

He lifted himself so they could both look down and see him hang in front of her. She had no idea what his size was compared to others, but the thought of it going into her while just two of his fingers felt like a lot, made her head spin.

He held his shaft to guide him to her heat, and rubbed the head around until it was soaked. Then he rubbed against her clit, and she felt her nerves start to get the better of her. "I…" she hesitated, but he stopped and looked at her immediately.

"Tell me, Madelyn," he said softly, his gaze kind.

"I'm… scared," she said honestly.

He pulled away and she felt a wave of relief and confusion. She'd wanted this, though, not that long ago. But, seeing how willing he was to stop for her, even as they were so close, it made her feel better. "Then we'll stop," he kissed her cheek and slid away from her.

"I'm sorry," she said and he shook his head, getting off the bed.

"Don't be, we went pretty far today. It wouldn't be fair for me to expect you to want to go all the way your first time. And I didn't think you would want to," he added. "I'm not upset," he added when she frowned at him.

"I… I just feel bad, I wanted to…"

"Don't feel bad," he said and pulled his boxers and pants back on then came back to her. "Hey," he lifted her chin. "This is important. And I'm never going to push you to do it."

"Okay," she said softly and nodded. "Okay," she repeated.

"I love you," he kissed her cheek and she returned the words with a smile. "I'll help you get dressed and we'll go find Duncan. Are you hungry?"

"Yes," she nodded and stood up, the cold wood of the floor made her shudder.

"What're you in the mood for?"

"I'm feeling something meaty," she said before pausing and hearing him laugh. She went red and rubbed her face. "Um… yeah, anyway," she breathed and looked at him. He gave her a sweet kiss.

"Come on," Robert took her hand and led her out of the house toward the cooking station.


	22. Plot Twist

**Huh, _three_ chapters in one night. Don't expect that to happen again for a while...**

* * *

Nate cursed and fired the last round in his rifle. Throwing the long weapon over his shoulder he grabbed the bull-barreled revolver he'd taken from Kellogg's body what felt like so long ago. He called it Better Bitch as it reminded him of a weapon he'd given Nora before the war he called Bitch.

The feral ghouls were on them faster than he could take them out, even with Hancock firing his combat shotgun. They should have been more careful. They should have scoped out the area before just walking right in.

Teeth sunk into the cloth of Nate's forearm and he was thrown to the ground on top of the ghoul biting him by another that hurled itself at him from behind. He cried out and threw the gun as a blunted weapon at the face attached to his arm. It gave and sprayed blood and brains. The one on his back was trying to gnaw through his heavy blue jacket. Nate rolled over and used his weight to crush the chest of the sickly creature. But two more descended on him and he had to use both his arms and legs to keep them from reaching his face. The sleeves of his coat no longer were pulled down to shield his forearms and the teeth met his flesh.

"Son of a–" he called out in agony, arching his back in pain.

Generally ferals left Hancock alone, but when he started to engage them, they would defend themselves. They did not nearly put as much effort into with him as they did Nate, though. So when he shoved the other ghoul away and spattered its skull over the pavement, Nate shouldn't have been surprised.

John was bleeding, but he was nowhere near as bad as Nate was at the moment. "Hey, you good?" he asked, grabbing the man's arm to look at the wound.

"I'll live," he stood up with some help and noticed a man behind Hancock was kicking over bodies. How had he missed someone else joining the fight? "Who's this?"

"Said his name was Tony Spark," John said and glanced at him. "He came in right when you went down."

"Just in time, if you ask me," the man said and smiled. It was a hell of a smile, making Nate pause to gaze at it. He wore a long blue coat, similar to the one Nate had, but it was more dress like with a thick black scarf tucked into it. Black hair stuck out from under his fedora in natural curls. He came close to the other two and the General noticed his icy blue eyes lingering on him, causing heat to filter into his cheeks.

"Thank you, Mr. Spark."

"Oh, please, call me Tony," he smiled and Nate noticed the scar on his lip, the only one on his clean-shaven face.

"Tony," Nate nodded. "I'm Nate Walker, and this is Hancock of Goodneighbor."

"Yes, I've heard of you, General… Sentinel… Sole Survivor," Tony smirked, his eyes locked on Nate's mouth before meeting his eyes. "And the Mayor of Goodneighbor," he gestured to the ghoul. "It's an honor."

Nate stuck out a hand and Tony shook it, holding on just a little too long. "Where are you headed?"

"Just… around, I don't have a place I call home, so I just…" he made a gesture around. "Could I… travel with you?"

Hancock glanced at Nate, leaving the decision up to him. "We're in a bit of a bind. We're looking for a group of people who have been taking settlers."

"Oh," he frowned, his eyes bugging in surprise, "I've heard of some settlements going empty, I didn't realize they were being taken…."

"What have you heard?" Hancock asked, tilting his head at the young man. The man pulled out two purified waters from his bag and offered them before speaking. The general took it with a word of thanks, cracked it open, and poured some of the drink over his wound before drinking. John snapped his can open and tipped it back.

Nate felt something strange, the hairs on the back of his neck standing at attention as he listened to the man speak, his smile stuck on his lips, drawing his eye sinfully. Never before had Nate been so drawn to someone. It was so odd, he shouldn't be looking at this man like this, not with John just feet away. But… John was looking at him to, the way he looked at Nate when they were together.

Suddenly, Nate realized he hadn't paid any attention to the young man in blue. "That's all I know," he finished, the grin on his mouth crooked, wrinkling the scar on his lips.

Nate's head felt light and he looked at Hancock as he shifted, looking dizzy. "I…" the ghoul blinked.

A fog took over Nate's vision and he met concerned icy blue eyes before hitting the ground, landing on his bleeding arm.

* * *

Nate woke to a splitting headache and the taste of… blood?

He choked and spat, looking around with blurry eyes. He couldn't make sense of what was around him. He could smell a fire, and that fire was the only light, he was somewhere dark. He coughed, trying to say something, anything, but it was stopped by the thickness in his mouth.

"Na…"

John's voice touched his ears lightly and he turned around to face it, trying to focus his vision. Nate choked again when he tried to speak.

"Oh, both of you need to just calm down," came a voice that Nate had to think about. He didn't know it well, but he'd heard it recently.

Tony.

After blinking a few times Nate could focus on the man sitting next to the fire. "I was starting to wonder when you'd wake up, _Natie_." The General's jaw tightened and he glared, half his face pressed into the dirt. "Yeah, there you go," Tony smirked, tilting his head so that his dark curls caught the light of the fire. He'd put his fedora on the ground next to him. "I like seeing that anger. It's different from you," he shifted his weight where he sat, pulling a leg up to his side and picked something off of a plate between him and the fire. "I think it's because you're prewar."

Nate tried to move his arms and found them bound behind his back, and this ankles were done up the same, bent so that they came to his hands. Tied like an animal at a campsite with the hunter sitting smugly just out of reach. He couldn't form words so he just stared the smaller man down.

"You know, I was worried about getting you," he pointed while he chewed, politely shielding his mouth so Nate couldn't see the food. "Not it, I figured I'd just… offer it some drugs or –hell– I could take it in a fight if I got around the shotgun." Tony gestured to John who was out of Nate's sight. He held a rib up from his plate and took a moment to swallow his current bite before pulling off another, dropping the clean bone to the ground. "You would have been much more difficult. I saw you go down from those ghouls. How many before they overwhelmed you? Twenty?" he whistled. "You really know how to handle yourself. I knew I couldn't bring you down without a little… help," he lifted a purified water and opened it, listening to the hiss. His and Hancock's hadn't hissed when they opened them.

Nate suddenly felt stupid. He'd gone to college, heard the stories about people putting shit in your drinks, how had he let this happen to him and John?

"Oh, don't feel bad," Tony swallowed and shifted to face Nate. "You had no reason not to trust me. You were just… being the General of the Minutemen. Not so much the Sentinel of the Brotherhood. Funny how the latter could have saved you… and your abomination boyfriend– Oh, wait, husband, right?" He smiled and lifted a golden ring, looking it over as it caught the light.

That burned hot in Nate's chest. His breathing picked up and sent puffs of dirt away from his face. This only made Tony smile more. That killer grin that showed off his teeth. He was unnaturally attractive. Then it clicked, and Nate's heart stopped.

"Oh! There it is! I knew you'd get it." The man jumped to his feet, pocketing Hancock's ring, and lying down so his face was close to Nate's. He smiled with more pride that Nate had ever seen in a single face. "Go on, say it. Say it, Nate."

"Rick." The word was little more than a bloody spit.

His smile widened somehow and he nodded. "Little Maddy told you all about me then right? Well, I had to tell her a name. I had to tell you one too, couldn't be the same, no, you'd catch on too quick that way," he shook his head and let his smile drift back into a more comfortable smirk. "I'm surprised you didn't know the moment you saw my clothes. Didn't she tell you how I looked?" Then he tilted his head, resting his chin on his fist. "Or did I distract you?"

Nate's glare hurt him with how much effort he put into it.

"So quiet. That's all right. I don't need you to talk yet. I have that… thing, over there when I need you to talk, I can make you talk," he gestured behind Nate again and John grunted in disgust. "Don't," he frowned passed Nate. "I don't want to hear you talk. If you say a fuckin' word, I swear to God I'll cut off one of Nate's fingers."

No noise came from behind him.

"Good," the blue-eyed man looked down at the General and smiled again. "Now. Back to you and me." He ran a hand through Nate's black hair, telling him his hat had been discarded at some point. "Now, tell me, did I distract you?" He tugged on the Sentinel's hair with too much force, causing him to clamp his jaw and tighten his glare. "Answer me, Nate."

He growled, his voice nothing.

"Now, as sexy as that is, I'm not really into men, so," the man pursed his lips and pulled harder on Nate's hair. "Unless you want one of – _that thing's_ – fingers," he looked disgusted, his mouth turning down. "I suggest you start answering."

"Yes," Nate spat.

"Yes… what?"

"Yes. You distracted me." The words were thick with hate, the kind that sent a shudder down his own spine.

"Ooh," Rick felt it and grinned. "Very nice. I like that attitude. Tell me…" he sat up and crossed his legs to steady himself. "What was it like before the war?" When Nate didn't answer, he reached behind him near his plate and picked up a dirty knife. The General closed his eyes.

"Green."

"Give me more."

"It was green. Everywhere, even the sky was green, but not with radiation." Nate stopped and looked at Rick. "The people were too concerned with their opinions of others to help or be productive. Your life was to revolve around making others happy."

"Sounds… like you like it better here, is that so, Nate?"

"Sometimes," he answered honestly, and glared at the younger man.

"What about that pretty little wife of yours? You buried her right? And then that soldier next to her, yeah? Up by the Vault you came out of?"

Nate glared, not answering.

"What was his name? Paladin… oh, come on, what was it? Tell me?" His eyes flickered back to John as he shifted the knife in his grasp

"Danse."

"Yes! That's right! Paladin… Danse." He'd known, he just wanted him to say it. He laughed a little at a thought and then nodded. "You thought he liked you, shared your feelings." He shook his head. "Turns out he'd rather have a cunt around his dick, huh?"

Nate's jaw was tight enough he could feel his teeth protest.

"Tell me… did seeing that little Knight make it easier? Living with the guilt of killing Danse? Now that you know he didn't really love you?"

"Shut your fucking mouth."

"Oh, there's the cord."

"No, I'm just sick of listening to you speak."

"Oh, now, Nate, don't go talking like that, I'll get offended," he lifted the knife and ran his thumb across it to test the edge. "Tell me, Nate, if Danse _was_ still alive… and let's just pretend he cared about you like you did him… would you have given this to him or would that thing back there still have it?" He turned John's ring in his fingers.

"What're you asking?" Nate's heart pounded.

"You know exactly what I'm asking: If Danse was still alive would he be the one lying behind you with this ring on?" He grinned and held the band in front of Nate's face. When he didn't get an answer right away he sighed, "That thing or Danse?"

"John."

Rick narrowed his eyes in disbelief. "See, I want to believe that, but I don't. Now, why would that be?" His icy blue eyes locked on the ring as he shifted it between his first finger and thumb. It was too small for either of those digits on him. "Tell me, Nate. Why don't I believe you?"

"You're a fucking idiot."

"Oh, see, now I'm offended." Rick stood up and dropped the ring to the dirt in front Nate's face, his grip on the knife tight.

"No, no, I'm sorry," Nate said immediately and rolled over so he could look back. Rick knelt beside Hancock who was tied up to a porch of a cabin, arms up above his head. His wrists were bleeding from how tight the ropes were, but he seemed fine otherwise.

Rick paused and glanced at Nate. He shook his head, "No, you see, if I don't do it now, you won't take me seriously." Then he grabbed the ghoul's bleeding hands. "Don't make a noise," he whispered close to Hancock's ear when he gasped in pain. "Or I'll do the same thing to Nate and stick his bleeding finger in your mouth."

The knife came to rest on John's hand, and then Rick shifted into Nate's view, blocking the sight. "Rick! Stop! I'll do anything!" he pleaded. Nate could hear Hancock's breathing pick up, and then he heard the slicing of flesh to bone. "No!"

When Rick leaned back on his heels he held the finger up so the blood dripped down onto the ground without touching him. Hancock's face was twisted in silent agony that tore out Nate's heart. His back arched with soundless cries. How he managed to keep quiet, Nate couldn't know. "There we go, now you know how serious I am, Nate."

"I'm so sorry, John, I'm so sorry," he breathed, looking at the ghoul's black eyes when they opened for a brief second. He bowed his head and seemed to focus on his breathing, not making any other sound.

"Oh, stop it, that's just disgusting," Rick stood up and came back over, sitting beside Nate where he had a moment ago. Nate didn't look at him, though, he watched John.

"I'll get us out of this."

"Look at me, Nate." Without needing another command he rolled over, looking at the man, then at the bleeding finger lying in the dirt next to the wedding band. He realized then it was Hancock's left ring finger he'd cut off, right below the center joint. "Now that that's done, you're going to be polite, yes?"

"Yes."

"Good." Rick shook his head, "I really wanted this to go down differently. I really wanted you to just… tell me the truth. I know it'll hurt… that thing, but I think it needs to know you would prefer a different 'abomination' over it." He used his fingers to make quotes around the Brotherhood's favorite term. "I don't blame you though, from what I gathered Danse was quite the looker, handy in a fight… a lot… like… you, actually. Was it like looking in a mirror?" Rick tilted his head.

"Sometimes."

"That's what made you two work so well together, right?"

"Yes."

"That's what made you fall for him, wasn't it?"

"…Yes…"

"Man, what a sight you two would have been," he shook his head. "Too bad I like pussy or I'd be getting a hard on," he laughed and then tilted his head. "Sorry, if I'm making you be polite I should at least do the same." He cleared his throat and composed himself. "I had a point to all this, I swear. I just… like being dramatic is all. It's why I'm so good at my job."

"What is your job?"

"No, none of that," he shook a finger at him, his icy eyes catching the light with an unspoken warning. "I ask the questions." Nate nodded once. "Good. Now, do you remember Deacon? From the Railroad?"

"Yes."

He smiled. "Good. I have a job similar to his. _Similar_. Now, refresh my memory, you killed him right?"

"Yes."

"After he trusted you? Tell me about that," he rested his chin on his hands, his elbows on his knees while his legs were crossed.

"I needed a Courser chip decoded and the Brotherhood couldn't manage it in a timely manner so I went to the Railroad. I told them what they needed to hear so I could get their help. Deacon… trusted me, and when the Brotherhood ordered me to, I hunted them down and killed them."

"How did it make you feel?"

"Like shit."

"No it didn't."

"No, I didn't care about the others. I killed them easily," he corrected, growling the words, his hazy blue eyes narrow. "I dropped a nuka grenade into their HQ and watched them die. But Deacon wasn't there. I had to… hunt _him_ down, and I had to…"

"How'd you have to kill him?"

"Headshot. He looked right at me from my position on a rooftop."

"Good," Rick nodded. "Good, you're getting good at this. Just keep doing this and you might just make it out with a quick death." Nate resisted saying any more while Rick reached behind him and grabbed his plate. There were two more ribs sitting there. "What else do I want to hear about the mighty Nate Walker?" he pursed his lips and looked his captive over. "Oh yes, one last question," he smirked and shifted, seeming to want to get comfortable in his excitement. "Did you know Madelyn's lying to you?"

Nate narrowed his eyes at him and felt his teeth snap together.

"Oh, you don't believe me?" he chuckled. "She's not even supposed to be here in the Commonwealth. How cute, right? She snuck here on that airship. That's why she's so desperate to stay with you until you think she can get promoted. Soon as that young Elder finds out she's here she gets shipped back to the Capital Wasteland."

"How could you know any of this?"

"She told Mac," he said with a sigh and shook his head. "I'm not answering any more of your questions. Next one you ask I'll cut off another finger." He picked up the digit, looked it over with a wrinkled nose, and dropped it back to the ground. "Anyway. She is only with you so she's not on the ship and she can get you to give her a recommendation that the Elder boy can't say no to." He sighed and shook his head, "Shame I've already got plans in motion that will ruin that little scam of hers."

Nate opened his mouth and closed it, stopping himself before he could ask what he was planning.

"Oh, good boy," he roughly patted Nate's hair. "See, that's why I cut off the finger, so you'd believe I was serious." Nate had nothing to say, so he kept quiet. "Don't worry, she won't be harmed. I couldn't bring myself to do that to her. Mac… well, I can't make the same promise for him." He shook his head and pointed to the scar on his lip. "I had a damn good face before… well, can't tell you exactly what, but that gunner asshole caused this, and… since then I just haven't been the same. So, he's not going to be spared."

"I'm starting to wonder about the point you're wanting to make."

"Oh, yes, of course," Rick picked up the rib and bit into it, looking up at the night sky. It was warm, no clouds or moon, without a breeze in the air. "I have to bring you back with me. The only problem is, I can't bring… that…" he nodded toward John. "And I know you won't leave willingly without it."

"That's correct."

"Yup, so," he swallowed and dropped the bone, picking the other up immediately. "I have a plan to make us both happy." He smiled and chewed, covering his mouth with the back of his hand after an awkwardly large bite. "You come with me willingly, and I _don't_ kill it. Fair? I think so."

"You won't harm him again?"

He sighed and glanced at the ghoul, he seemed to be trying to decide if he should let the question slide. "Yes, I won't harm _it_ again, all you have to do is come with me."

"Okay."

John's head snapped up, "Nate, don't–"

"What the fuck did I say?" Rick turned on him. Hancock's jaw set and he glared. "I'll fuckin' do it."

The ghoul's eyes narrowed. "I don't think you will," he said, a bite in his tone that Nate hadn't heard in months.

Rick's eyes narrowed and he shook his head, "There's no getting passed you, is there?"

John didn't reply to that, instead he just looked at Nate. He didn't have to say anything, he knew what he was thinking. Only one of them was going to make it out of this in the end. John wanted it to be Nate and Nate wanted it to be John.

"I'll go with you if no harm comes to him or anymore settlements."

Rick watched Nate's face and he nodded in thought. "See, I can't make the promise for the settlements," he shifted forward and held up the remaining rib in front of Nate holding the meat in front of his face. "You see, a man's gotta eat, and I got a lot of men needin' feedin'." With that he pulled the meat from the bone and chewed, not bothering to cover his mouth this time as his lips parted, allowing the sloshing sound to reach Nate's ears.

It only took Nate a second to understand those words and taste bile rise in his throat. Rick wiggled a brow at him and finished the rib before dropping it to the plate and standing, grabbing a rag from his back pocket of his jeans under his coat and wiping his hands and face. Nate's hazy blue eyes were wide in a mix of horror and disgust at the man in front of him.

"I knew I wouldn't have to spell it out to you, I just hoped you would have seen the pointers sooner. I mean, come on, Nate, didn't you see the body?" He sidestepped and Nate looked passed him. The glare of the fire had melded the shapes and colors into one mess that he hadn't given two previous fucks about until now.

Lana's face was the only part of her that was remotely recognizable. She'd been stripped, opened up, and gutted like a deer. Parts of her were missing –her left arm to her elbow, the right leg to her knee , ribs. Her eyes had been left open and were now a paled over grey haze. He couldn't remember what color they had been, but it looked so wrong.

"She was working with us," Rick sighed. "Started getting squeamish." He knelt down beside her and ran the back of his fingers over her white cheek. "She showed you our uniforms… was stupid of her. Might not have caught on to her if it wasn't for that. All she had to do was _tell_ you." He shook his head in disappointment. "She made for a good meal though. I'll save what I can. Share with the others back at home."

"How many of you are there?"

Rick's icy blue eyes caught the light of the fire, reflecting orange. "Too many for just you to take. Your Minutemen aren't gonna be able to stop us either."

"I don't have just the Minutemen behind me."

"You think the Brotherhood gives two shits about my people?" He laughed out right. "I have Brotherhood _in_ my ranks."

"Traitors," Nate said simply.

He smiled and came to sit in front of the Sentinel. "See, I think I like you because you have… this set of beliefs," he held his hands up so that they were spaced parallel and in front of him. "Shit falls within it, great, you like it. If it don't, then it's not worth your time." He tilted his hands so he had his palms up. "Minutemen have the beliefs you share," he lifted his right hand. "Brotherhood has that military family I'm assuming you had before the war," he lifted his left hand and then let them rest at equal heights. "Now, who do you _really_ care about? You favor one, right? You have to." He played with the scales his hands made, and then lifted his right one higher. "It's the Minutemen, isn't it?"

"I lead them."

"You do…" he nodded his agreement. "But." He dropped the right hand to his knee and held the left up, "You were never really into being Top were you?"

Nate's jaw set and Rick nodded, having his answer.

"If it were Brotherhood soldiers going missing you wouldn't have fucked around so much, would you? Runnin' back and forth with that thing and little Maddy?" He shook his head, "Nope, you would have assembled a squad and been all over locating those soldiers."

Nate couldn't speak, he didn't understand how this man could know things about him he'd never realized. It was the truth. He wasn't trying his hardest to find those settlers. Why not? Why the fuck had he delayed so much?

"Oh, Nate," Rick ran a hand through the Sentinel's hair. "Don't beat yourself up."

"Get your hands off me."

"Hand," he corrected, but withdrew it. After wetting his scared lip he shifted and smirked. "Still going to come with me in exchange for that thing's life?"

"Yes." There was no question, even as Hancock grunted in protest.

"Perfect," Rick stood up and started to pack things together. "I would say sorry for what I'm about to do, but I can't… _really_ trust you not to try to escape. But I feel better knowing that you would have gone willingly." Rick returned and had a little glowing pill. "Go on and eat this please, I hate…" he shuddered and gaged a second, "I hate forcing pills down people's throats."

Nate's jaw tightened and he rolled over so that he was awkwardly lying on his back with his arms and legs under him, protested the position, but he ignored them and looked at Hancock. "I love you, John."

"I love you, Nate."

"God I'm going to throw up, eat the damn pill, Nate," he grabbed the Sentinel's jaw and pressed the blue thing to his lips. Nate opened his mouth and allowed the pill in. "Thank Christ," he spat and stood up, allowing Nate to swallow the bitter, dry pill in his own time. "It'll take effect here in a moment." Rick went to his bag and pulled out a Vault-Tec lunch box with a few wires and lights duct tapped to it. A bottle cap mine. He'd seen a few before and almost got killed by half of them.

"What're you doing?"

"Making sure that this thing doesn't try to follow us," he said simply and flipped a switch, resting the box on John's lap. "I don't think moving would be in your favor," he said to the ghoul, and then stood up and came back to Nate.

Now Nate's head was swimming and he tried to keep awake, but the sluggishness he was feeling caused his blinks to turn into long, drug out black outs. He went from lying on the ground to being face to face with Lana, to facing the stars that were fading into a morning light, to being face down on something walking along the pavement.

He felt like he'd just thrown up. There was no taste in his mouth though.

He was numb.

He couldn't move.

Nate's last sight was John sitting with his arms strung up above his head with a bottle cap mine in his lap, illuminated by a dying fire. He wanted to tell him one more time he loved him, but he couldn't form words, and the darkness took him once more, only this time, he didn't wake up from it.

* * *

 **So it took one of my roommates making a joke for me to realize just how Hetero I accidentally made Rick (It was one hand! No homo!). Well, I guess that's my birthday gift to you guys who don't like Nate x Hancock. xD**

 **Just how Hetero is Rick?**

 **IT'S OVER 9000!**


	23. Strong Winds

**Hope you don't mind, this one is a bit long, I don't know how it happened, but there's a bit of love and plot in here...**

* * *

"Should they have gone this long without checking in?" Piper breathed, resting her arm against the wall above MacCready. Madelyn watched them from across the room, holding Duncan as he flipped through a comic book.

Robert had his long legs tucked between his rear and the armrest with his back to her. In his lap he was also reading a comic book. Piper picked up his hat and sat it on the backrest so she could look at him easier. Madelyn's heart fluttered and she felt a glare coming on. She didn't like how the woman was leaning to look at him. "Listen, angel, none of us can tell Nate what to do. He, out of all of us, has proven he can handle himself."

Angel? Madelyn's heart stopped. She'd never heard him say that before. He… never called her that. She frowned and looked over Duncan's shoulder, her cheeks bright red.

They were in the living room of the house next to the Clubhouse. This house had been made into a library-ish area, with books and chairs and shelves all over the place. Robert thought it would be nice for them to sit and relax for a little while. When they'd picked up Duncan from the playground he'd insisted on sitting in her lap while they read a Grognak the Barbarian comic. He was making up a story to go with the pictures because he couldn't read well enough yet. He got some of the words though and showed off often how he wrote his name well. His father was quite proud of him, and would sign his name next to the boy's. Madelyn liked seeing Robert write and read. It was something it seemed a lot of wastelanders didn't bother with.

He'd found his favorite comic though, and retreated to the chair by the door. _His_ chair by the door. Normally he didn't sit with his back to the entrance, but he seemed to make an exception when he sat there, curling up in a ball in the old red thing. Duncan liked sitting on the ground, which meant she and he were on the other side of the room so that Madelyn could have her back against the wall for support.

Piper had come in with concerns about Nate and Hancock, reflecting her own feelings as the two of them had been gone three days without so much as a check in or sighting from any settlements still up. It'd gotten bad enough Preston had decided to make a trip this way from the Castle.

But, as important as all of that was, Madelyn couldn't get over that little five-letter word. Angel.

"Love?" a hand touched her shoulder and she snapped up to see Robert kneeling beside her. That name would take a while to get used to. But she felt her brows furrow and she looked back down at Duncan in her lap trying desperately to reach another comic without moving.

"What?" Oops, there was a little too much bite behind that.

His brows lifted and the corners of his mouth dropped. "Something wrong?"

"No," she stated. Her one-word sentences told the truth though. She never spoke so shortly.

"Madelyn," he whispered and sat down beside her, his hand on her sliding across her shoulder to the other so he could pull her into his side. Then he leaned forward and grabbed the book for Duncan easily with his long arm. She didn't look at him.

Angel.

The word had only ever been said once or twice around her, and it had _always_ been an endearment. Hell, Glass tried it on Reagan once and she'd gotten pissed he thought he could call her that. It'd been something she thought she'd liked to be called –by the right person. Now it sounded like a swear. Something to curse someone with.

Angel.

She wanted to gag.

"What's wrong?" he asked, his face close to hers. She looked at him sideways, and met MacCready blue eyes. It was its own shade, a color that Duncan and he shared, and she hoped that if they had kids that those children would have that lovely shade as well instead of her grey ones.

"Angel?" She lifted a brow at him, coming back to the thoughts festering in her mind now. Again with the one word replies, but he knew the moment the word left her lips what had her upset.

Surprise seeped in, and he blinked. "Oh, Madelyn," he frowned and looked at the doorway where the reporter had been. "I don't call her that because I like her. It's… actually the opposite." He smirked and then glanced at her. "I can't stand that woman. She talks _way_ too much, and she just gets all in your face…" he shook his head. "Oh no, Angel's the only thing I can call her without getting slapped. It doesn't mean anything. I swear."

She looked down at the back of Duncan's head. He turned a little to look up at her and grinned, his cheeks showing dimples, "Mrs. Piper's annoying."

She grinned and then looked at Robert who chuckled and praised the boy with a rustle of his hair. "See? I swear, love, you don't have anything to worry about. From her, or anyone."

Love…. That was much better than Angel. "Okay," she forced herself to smile and look at him. "I'm sorry, I've… never had this before, and I don't know how to react to things." She was embarrassed. She shouldn't have acted that way.

"Just have to talk to me when there's something wrong," he said simply and kissed her temple. "Communication is key. I don't want anything between us," he added and she felt him tug lightly on her shirt. The flirt had a lot of meaning behind it, and it made a heat grow in her stomach.

That made her smile and she tilted her head against him and read over Duncan's shoulder.

* * *

Two more days without word of Nate and Sanctuary was on edge. Robert was finally getting stressed out as it seemed like more people went to him now and he couldn't stand it. He thanked the heavens and the earth when Preston showed up and started taking charge. They decided they were going to send out a couple of teams to look for Nate and Hancock.

Madelyn carried Duncan against her side while she walked him to childcare. He was rubbing his eyes and looking around at the morning light. "I wanna go with you and daddy…"

"I know, precious," she whispered and kissed his forehead. He nuzzled her neck and she sighed. "Daddy and I will be back soon though, I promise."

"I miss you, mommy," he said, his voice soft, a shade away from a cry.

"I won't be gone long, okay?" she leaned away so she could look at his face. She liked when he called her mommy, more than she probably should have, but she didn't think about that right now.

He sniffed and rubbed his nose now. "You don't go missing, not like Mr. Nate and John," he said, trying hard to get the words out clear.

"I'm not going to go missing, I promise," she kissed his cheek and he nodded. Then he kissed her cheek back and nuzzled her close when they came to the childcare building. "You'll be a good boy, yes?"

"Yes," he nodded and patted her cheek. She smiled at him and kissed his hand. He seemed to be comforted by this and she sat him down on his feet. The door opened and a young helper smiled at her.

"Hi there," she looked at Duncan. "Hey there, big guy, sleepy?" He nodded and reached for her hand. She took it and waved to Madelyn before closing the door.

Maddy stood there on the steps, her mind drifting off. She liked this. What she was doing here, living in houses instead of barracks, waking up and doing whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted. She liked being with Duncan and Robert. And… she wouldn't have this if she went back to the Brotherhood.

With a hard swallow, she turned around and looked at the crowd of people gathering at the gates. Robert was already over there, with Preston, talking through a plan. When she got there everyone had been split into two and three man teams. She was obviously paired with MacCready, who didn't want anyone else with him.

When he came to her side she lifted a brow at him. "Why not have another person?"

"I want to be able to move quickly, and… honestly I would go alone, but I know you wouldn't have that," he confessed and she smirked.

"Hell no I wouldn't," she put her hands on her hips and glared up at him. He smirked and ran a hand over her cheek, and then pulled on the bill of her hat, which tugged on her ponytail.

"Come on, we need to get moving."

And they did. She was able to keep up fairly well, considering the pace they held. By the time they stopped for a break, though, her legs and arms were aching from jogging and holding her ten-millimeter.

"Do you want to eat anything?" he asked, throwing his rifle over his shoulder as he picked through the bag they'd brought.

"Um, I'm not sure, I'm not really hungry," she looked at the sky. It had to be about two hours passed noon.

"I'm surprised Nate took so many off road trails," Robert said offhandedly while he chewed on some squirrel. "He normally sticks to the roads pretty well… since he knew most of this area before the war, and it makes it harder to track."

"Maybe he was trying to save time?" The sniper had found what he thought were the Sentinel's tracks walking beside Hancock's headed east of Red Rocket. So while the others split off in different directions, they followed this path.

He narrowed his eyes and looked around. "This can't be right, there's no reason Nate would come out this far east…"

"Why not?"

"All the settlements getting attacked are south of Sanctuary, and Sanctuary is about as far west as you can get. So… if anything we should be focusing on the settlements located in the west half of the Commonwealth…."

"That's where the others are going, right?" She lifted a brow at him and Robert nodded, taking another bite. "So if there's something down that way they'll find it."

"But these tracks…" he looked at the ground and chewed with his lips parted while he thought.

"What is it?" she was starting to get a bad feeling.

"Fuck," he breathed and cringed, but didn't correct himself. The word shocked her, and he stood, throwing the stick the squirrel bits had been on. "How didn't I see that?"

"What?" she stood up and reached for his arm when he growled wordlessly and kicked his boot over the ground, spraying rocks and dirt.

"Nate and Hancock," he back tracked some and pointed out the prints. "Look," he gestured. "They're walking, straight, side by side."

"Okay," Madelyn frowned, feeling stupid that she wasn't following his train of thought.

"Nate's army–Brotherhood, whatever, he always… pivots while he walks," he straightened up and showed her, walking in a straight line and then twisting slightly to look around, causing the straight track to skew slightly. "And Hancock does a circle about every hundred yards," he gestured to the tracks. "These are supposed to be their tracks, but these aren't them."

"So we've followed the wrong tracks?" she lifted an eyebrow.

"Someone's set this up, they wanted these tracks to be followed," he looked off behind her where they'd come from and then back the direction they were headed.

"So… should we go back?"

"But who made these tracks?" he asked, brows heavy. "If Nate and Hancock are that way someone else will find them, but we're the only ones running this direction," he looked back at her and she frowned.

"But it could be a trap."

"Yeah," he stepped up to her, holding her shoulders. "Do you trust me?"

"Of course," she looked up at him, her head tilted back.

"Then we keep following these tracks, if nothing else, they come to a dead end and we go back."

"Okay," she nodded and he gave her a tiny smile. "Lead on."

"Just stay behind me, and stay close."

* * *

Robert was pissed. They'd wasted a whole day and a half following the trail for it to come to a road and die off completely. She never heard so many swears out of one person before, and since she'd never heard him cuss… it almost scared her.

"Rob, it's okay," she reached for his arm and he turned on her sharply, before stopping himself. She stared at him, grey eyes wide.

"I'm sorry, love," he held her face and kissed her forehead sweetly.

"We should take a break, it's getting late…" she looked at the sky. They hadn't stopped but when it was too dark for him to see, and even then he refused to sleep. She'd only closed her eyes for an hour or so. "That building looks easy to secure," she gestured to a house.

"Okay," he nodded and took her hand in his as they walked.

Once they were inside they found a nice room on the second floor with a halfway clean bed. She sat down on it and kicked her boots off while he lit a couple candles to give them light, in the dying evening. He looked at her and tilted his head. "Comfortable?"

"Not as much as I could be." She smirked, "I would sleep better with about fifty other beds and people sleeping around me."

He smiled and came to her side, looking at the window over the bed. It had been boarded up and the light of the candles wouldn't reach it. They didn't have to worry about someone outside seeing them.

She took his hand and pulled him down next to her. Madelyn wanted to be close to him, and as he removed his coat she felt that heat in her belly return. Without a word, she leaned in and started kissing his neck.

He made a curious noise and let her mouth his throat, moving her lips up to his eventually. "We don't have to do this," he said and she nodded.

"I want to."

"Now? Here?"

"Yes," she was sure. She regretted shying out of it before. She wished she would have let him keep going. Now she had the chance again and she wanted to take it.

"Okay," he breathed. He had all the motivation he needed.

"I love you," she whispered as he kissed her jaw.

"I love you, Madelyn," he growled into her neck.

It didn't take them long to strip each other. Then he kissed her like he did the first time but this time she wasn't as nervous, and he didn't work as slowly. She didn't mind that though, because she actually kind of wanted to rush him.

That was until his face was buried down between her legs and then all her thoughts scattered and she could only just managed to moan his name over and over, her fingers locking in his rough brown hair. He seemed happy by her reaction and praised her with bites to her thighs and long, loving sucks to her clit. Her release built up, coiling deep inside her, and when she drew her legs up and held tight to her own knee he picked up his pace, bringing her to her end.

Her world shattered and she cried out, her back arching and she tried to cover her mouth to stifle the sound, but she couldn't silence herself.

"How was that?" Robert asked while he wiped off his face and came up to kiss her.

"Amazing," she breathed and he smiled.

"Are you ready?" he tilted his head, his lips moving to her jaw. She could feel him rubbing against her thigh.

"Yes," she said and smiled despite her heart pounding in her chest.

Robert moved so his length rested on her clit, and he took this moment to adjust himself, lowering to her, his face right above hers, and his hands on her. His hips rocked forward and she felt him glide his length up so the head brushed her belly button. His balls touched against her and she let out a slow breath. Then Robert withdrew the length rubbing her clit backward now.

He moved back and forth and each time he moved just a little closer until she was watching for him inside her. His tip split her soaked lips and pressed up into her, stopping with just his thick head stretching her.

"Oh," she whispered, uncomfortable. She looked at his face, he was watching her carefully, but his expression was focused. He withdrew and then slid back in, just the head entering her, working her slowly until she was comfortable with it. Her breathing began to slow as she focused on relaxing under him.

"You feel so good," he whispered, his forehead pressing against hers. Again he withdrew and slowly pushed back into her, only his hips making the movement. One of his hands rested under her head to take hold of her hair while the other massaged her left side. She was holding her legs up on either side of his hips, squeezing his waist.

"I don't know what to do," she whispered, embarrassed.

"You don't have to do anything, love," he met her gaze, putting her at ease. "I'll do all the work, just relax and tell me if you want to stop."

"Okay, I just want it to be good for you," she whispered, unsure of where her voice went.

"This is perfect, Madelyn," he reassured her. His hips moved a little more, pushing his thick shafted deeper. She could feel it as it stretched and filled her.

She had never put anything in there before, so the sensation was enough on its own to work her up. It felt so good, but it hurt. Her hands gripped his forearms because she didn't know what else to do. When he withdrew, it almost felt more uncomfortable. But he kept going, deeper and deeper, slowly, to the point she thought he was never going to run out of length, and she was going to run out of space for him.

Then his hips touched hers and he paused. Robert's warm balls rested against her, touching the space between where he'd speared her and her ass. He held himself there and looked at her face. "How do you feel?"

"I'm good," she said and looked down between them. Their chests were touching, but she wanted to look at them. "Can I… see?" she asked. He nodded and readjusted so that he was on his hands, pushing himself up, but kept his hips against hers. She reached down and ran her fingers through the hair in the V of his waist. "I want to watch it go in," she looked back to his face and he nodded.

"Put your feet on the mattress and hold onto me," he suggested and she did. She gripped his shoulders and he reached around her with one hand to hold her head up for her. His head rested against hers and he began withdrawing his hips.

"Oh," she breathed as his length pulled out, glimmering in the candlelight, soaked with her juices. She was impressed that something so thick and long could fit inside her. Robert's hips stopped when the head rested between her lips back outside her entrance. "I'm ready," she said.

Robert nodded and pushed into her slowly. Her eyes were locked on the sight of him disappearing inside her. She let out a long breath as he filled her, the pain returning but it was accompanied by an amazing feeling of pleasure.

"Oh, Robert," she whispered, her eyes locking on his now. He was looking at her, his lips parted and his blue eyes focused. "Go a little faster," Madelyn requested softly.

He just nodded, his hips automatically moving continuously now, without a pause. The friction felt good and she loved when he got down to the base, their skin slapping together. He seemed focused, and she wondered if it was hard for him to do this.

Madelyn bit her lip and whispered, "Faster."

Robert immediately picked up again, the continuous motion now moving slightly quicker. She glanced down at him entering her and felt pleasure fill her. His hand on her head held her up to him and she took this chance to kiss him. Her lips brushed his at first, then he kissed back, the rhythm of his hips faltering with the new task before picking back up.

Madelyn felt her cheeks burn and she asked, "Can you go a little faster?"

Her sniper picked up his pace and bent his face to kiss her neck. Now his speed was adding a gentle roughness to it and she found she liked it. "Christ, Maddy," he whispered and bit her shoulder.

Madelyn moaned and tightened around him. "Rob–" she breathed, his thrusts shaking her and the bed with a delicious force she'd not expected she would enjoy. "Robert–"

"Madelyn," he grunted and now moved at a swift pace that took away her breath. Her back arched and she cried out his name, repeated it with each of his thrusts. "Madelyn," he pressed his face into her neck and held her tight. "I'm close."

She didn't really know what that meant but she doubted she should ask. His thrusts were quick and shallow. His skin was slick with sweat and burned. His breathing was ragged.

"Fuck–" he grunted and his body froze. She felt him pulse inside her, and a warmth fill her. Then he pulled out, seeming to regain some control. "Fuck," he repeated softly and they watched as his head pulsed and spat onto her stomach and breasts.

"Wow," she whispered, meeting his eyes, "There's a lot."

"It's been a while," he said softly and kissed her cheek. "Christ, I'm sorry if I hurt you, love."

"No, Robert, that was…" she had no words. "I never knew it would be like this."

"Good," he smiled at her, kissing her cheek again. The cold air was starting to chill her and her sniper got up, pulled his pants on, and found a shred of fabric to clean them off with. Then he found his coat and draped it around her to warm her up.

"That was so…" she whispered, unable to stop smiling.

"I'm happy you liked it so much," he said proudly.

"Can we… go again?" she asked softly.

Surprise caught his eye. "Love, you'll want a break. It's going to be hard for you to walk in the morning. And I need a break, I only got so much in me –I'm a bit out of practice."

"Okay," she put her arms through the sleeves of his coat.

"We'll see how you feel tomorrow," he promised.

"Okay," she nodded and looked down at her sex. There was a little blood where she'd been lying, but nothing too bad. Now that she sat still, she noticed the pain radiating up to her belly. "I'm happy we did this," she told him.

"Me too," Robert smiled and knelt in front of her after. "It won't hurt every time."

"Good," Madelyn touched his face. "It didn't hurt that bad, just it would be nice if it didn't hurt at all." His lips caught hers and she lost herself in the kiss.

"I just want you to know, I've been dying to do this and it's really hard for me not to take you again."

"I think I'd like if you took me again," she flushed.

MacCready kissed her blush, causing it to deepen. "Tomorrow. I promise we'll do something. Whatever you'd like."

"Okay," she nodded and relaxed down into the bed while he curled up next to her. The burning was getting a little worse. Of course he'd be right. She took a deep breath and ran a hand through her green hair, then rolled over and buried her face in the crook of his neck. "In the morning then."

* * *

"Love?"

Madelyn opened her eyes and met stunning blue ones. "Hi," she breathed and he grinned.

"We'll need to get going soon," he said and his hand ran up her bare thigh.

"Oh," she smiled, looking at his fingers when he stopped.

"How do you feel?"

The soreness was aching in her lower body, but she wanted to do more. "It hurts a little," she said and he nodded.

"We'll wait then."

"No, please, I want to…." She sat up and held his arm to keep him close.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

He nodded and leaned in to kiss her. But he stood and she frowned up at him. He was dressed and ready to go and now he was getting her clothes together. "I don't want to hurt you," he said when he saw the confusion on her face.

"Robert, I'm fine," she sat up and winced.

"No you're not, love," he sat down beside her on the bed and cupped her jaw, meeting her grey eyes. "We have all the time in the world. But right now we need to get moving, it's going to take us a little time to get back to Sanctuary," he touched her bare stomach and she looked down. "We'll go as slow as you need."

Madelyn took her time to stand and tested her steps. It wasn't the worst pain she'd ever felt, but it was definitely different. "I'm ready," she breathed and he helped her get dressed before taking the lead to return to Sanctuary.

It was a painfully long walk, and Madelyn felt horrible for wanting to stop constantly, but Robert never complained. He even lightened the mood with jokes and flirts which made her feel better. When night came they stopped under a large tree and she relaxed while leaning against him, his arm wrapped around her. She tucked herself under his coat and told him about her friends back in the Brotherhood.

"I'm not going to lie, I'm kind of surprised that you're so close to someone like Reagan," he breathed. "I mean, I get Merrin, she seems nice and all, but Reagan… is a bit…" he looked for the right words.

"She's pretty badass," Madelyn sighed and closed her eyes. "She was so fun to have around. She never took shit from anyone. Specially Rhys, and Rhys loves giving people shit."

"Yeah, I've heard," he grunted and looked down at her.

"He's not good enough for Reagan," the squire sighed. "Danse was, though, I could never see her with anyone but him."

"I don't think she could either," MacCready added and leaned his head back against the tree, remembering the conversation he'd had with the knight.

"They would have had the cutest babies…" Madelyn said suddenly.

"Synths can have kids?" his brows pulled together.

"I don't see why not," she frowned. "They're human with the exception of the chip in their head, right? You can't even tell if someone is a synth unless you kill them, so…" she shifted against him in thought. "If they didn't have the ability to bare children, don't you think that might be a pretty good test to know if you were one or not?"

"Oh…" he blinked, his breath leaving him slowly. "I never… thought of that."

She shrugged. Her brows frowned a little and she got lost in her thoughts. "I… don't know why I love the Brotherhood."

MacCready went stiff, "What?"

"We… we hate so much…" she blinked away a few tears and ran the back of her hand under her eyes. "I… we turned on Danse because he was a synth? But he'd… he'd joined us, been with us for years… I watched him grow up, get promoted. He was…" she shook her head. "Reagan was there when he joined –she was born into the Brotherhood– and she told me about the day she first saw him." Madelyn shook her head. "He… he never would have done anything against us and we just… sentenced him to death."

The sniper's jaw was set, he didn't think she needed his two caps worth so he let her continue.

"What if I'm a synth? Arthur was so close with Danse… and he just…. Would he do the same to me? I'm like his little sister, he's told me so. He told me he loved me, and he'd never let anything bad happen to me, but would that all go out the window just because I have a chip in my head?"

"Madelyn," Robert's arms around her tightened and he kissed her hat. "Stop, he wouldn't hurt you."

"How do you know?" She gazed up at him with teary grey eyes, dark in the night light.

"Because, you're more than his friend. Danse was a friend, and he was a high-ranking official. He felt betrayed. You… you're different. You're a girl he _saved_ and he's helped you, watched you grow up, taken care of you. You and him are closer than he could have ever been with Danse. It would be different with you." He shook his head.

"What about you? What if I was a synth?"

"I don't care, love, you know that," he frowned and ran his thumb over her cheek to wipe away her tear.

"I wish more of the Brotherhood was like Nate. Hancock isn't bad," she sighed and looked down at her hands. "I wish Arthur was more like Nate."

"Maybe you can make him," Robert offered. She looked up and lifted an eyebrow. "You're the closest thing to family the guy has, right? You probably are the only one that could change his mind on a subject. You could be the one to get him to chill out, relax his steel grip…."

She snorted humorlessly, "He'd just throw up his walls and tell me he has to do it for the Brotherhood. He can't make exceptions because then he'd lose respect."

"Then show him how many people would respect him more," the sniper tilted his head and she blinked.

"Since Danse there has been a lot of…" she frowned and bit her lip. "I… I need to sleep," she decided and he nodded, resting his cheek on her head.

"Go to sleep, I'll keep watch."

"Will you wake me up so you can sleep some?"

"Maybe, don't worry about it," he smiled and she sighed.

 _Rick sat at Maxson's table in his personal quarters, his feet kicked up on the surface and crossed. Madelyn stood in the doorway, gaping at him before she realized he had a bull-barreled .44 pointed right at Arthur who was sitting on his bed, glaring at the other man._

 _"_ _What're you doing?" Madelyn gasped and stepped inside. The door snapped shut behind her, she resisted looking at it, knowing it was locked and she now was forced to stay in this room with Rick and Arthur._

 _"_ _Miss me? It's been a few days," he commented and tilted his head his black curls shifting into his icy eyes. "Was starting to think you forgot about me."_

 _She gritted her teeth and her fingers pulled up fists. "What. Are. You. Doing?"_

 _"_ _Oh, someone's getting' feisty," he grinned and dropped his feet, but kept the gun trained on the Elder of the Brotherhood. "I'm trying to help you, Maddy."_

 _"_ _What do you mean?"_

 _"_ _Oh, come on, you knew the moment you saw me I was familiar."_

 _"_ _What are you talking about?" her brows pulled down and she glared at him._

 _"_ _Maddy he's–" Arthur started, and Rick shot him, the bullet hitting him in the shoulder._

 _"_ _I told you, Maxy, not to speak," he growled and then looked at Madelyn who was gaping at Arthur holding his wound. His face was twisted in pain and anger, and he swore a few times. "Now, Maddy, this is your dream, so come on, figure this out."_

 _"_ _I don't understand," she cried, looking back at Rick._

 _He sighed and stood up, coming toward her. "Look at me, tell me; I look familiar, yes?"_

 _Her jaw set. Of course he looked familiar, how many times had she seen him now? She wet her lips. "I don't…"_

 _His jaw clenched: his disappointment was apparent. "What about now?" he asked and spun around quickly. As he did the 360 he changed. He wasn't wearing the blue coat and black scarf anymore, instead he wore an orange Brotherhood uniform._

 _"_ _You're… Brotherhood?" she gasped at him._

 _"_ _Better than that," he gave her his killer smile and she recognized it now with the orange flight suit. It was the Glass smirk. A family of famous lancers. She was sort of friends with Michael Glass, the bastard son of Victor Glass. She didn't know his legitimate sons but by name, Jacob –who had come with Michael with the Prydwen over two years ago and had gone MIA when his vertibird was shot down– and_ _Robert_ _–who was only ten and a squire, but had also come with the Prydwen. Victor Glass always preferred Jacob of his three sons. And everyone knew it, especially Michael who was the same age and just as successful as his half brother._

 _Madelyn had only seen Jacob in person once when he and Reagan had been forced into an engagement by their Lancer-Captain fathers. Victor wanted Jacob to have the best wife possible, and William Knight's daughter was the obvious choice. Reagan had been pissed and upset as she was under Danse's command at the time, and had strong feelings for her CO, but that didn't matter to the Lancer-Captains. Their engagement had ended suddenly, though, when William and Danse had both beaten the young Lancer-Sergeant for reasons that were never disclosed. Reagan told Merrin, everyone else was on need to know, which meant Madelyn didn't know._

 _She felt her heart hammer in her chest. Rick was Lancer-Sergeant Jacob Glass. "You… you're MIA."_

 _"_ _Missing in Action," he nodded, and tapped the barrel of the gun to his temple. "Not dead, though. Not like everyone wishes."_

 _"_ _No one wishes for you to be dead," she breathed._

 _"_ _That's not true and you know it," he smirked at her._

 _Her brows tugged together. Okay, sure, a lot of people hated the Glass family, but that was because they were all dicks, even Michael was a pretty big dick, and she considered him a friend sometimes. But Jacob had been loved an adored. "Why are you doing this? Why didn't you ever come back to the Prydwen if you're alive?"_

 _He shook his head, "This is your dream, Maddy, I only know what you know."_

 _She felt her jaw clench. "Then… why are you here?"_

 _"_ _So I can help, I told you, I'm here to help you," he sighed and came to stand in front of her, looking down at her with the stunning blue eyes that his father had given him. "You know how criminal master minds work, you've read all those books in Maxy's office," he smirked._

 _"_ _You want to be caught."_

 _"_ _Bingo," he poked her nose and she wrinkled it in response. "I knew you'd get it."_

 _"_ _Where are Nate and Hancock?"_

 _"_ _You know what's happened to them," he sighed, his shoulders relaxing at her._

 _"_ _You've taken them."_

 _"_ _Well," he tilted his head back and forth. "Maybe, but you should be waking up soon, shouldn't you? Tell Mac who I am and all that, I'm sure he'll appreciate it," he glanced over his shoulder at Maxson sitting on the bed, his shoulder still bleeding. "You know you'll have to go to the Prydwen," he tilted his head at her._

 _"_ _I… I can't, not yet, I'm not ready," she breathed and Jacob glared at her._

 _"_ _You're willing to risk Nate's life for you to get promoted?"_

 _"_ _No," she breathed, her bows pulling together defensively._

 _"_ _Then you get your little ass on that air ship and you tell Maxy who the fuck I am, Madelyn. Christ." He tossed the gun onto the table behind him and grabbed her shoulders. "Wake up, Madelyn."_

 _"_ _Okay, stop touching me," she tried to squirm. There was a loud humming and wind started to smack her face. The papers in the room started swirling and some things fell to the floor with the force of the gust._

 _"_ _Wake up, love," Jacob shook her again._

 _"_ _Don't call me that," she growled at him and tried to slap him, but her hands were pinned to her side._

 _"_ _Wake up!" Robert's voice echoed in her ears and she snapped awake._

"Madelyn," Robert held her cheek and she gasped. Blinking as dirt and dust swirled around them.

A vertibird was landing near by. Her heart hammered in her chest, oh no, no no no no no…. She stood up, ignoring the sniper as he asked her something. It was just passed sunrise. The sun was barely over the cityscape.

How could they have found her? She wasn't even in her uniform, and they didn't know MacCready…

"Madelyn, do you know these men?" Robert tilted her face to look at him. She blinked and her brows pulled together. He pointed to a very large man in a strange red and black flight suit. Her face twisted further when she saw the men on either side of him standing at attention wearing the same flight suits. They looked Brotherhood, but she didn't know them, they didn't look the least bit familiar. The one in front was the highest ranking, obviously, but he was some years younger than the other two. He looked sort of like Maxson, but with a short, close trimmed beard and thinner brows. His nose was freckled and broken, shoved so far to the left it was painfully obvious he was never going to be able to straighten it.

The man behind him and to his left –closer to Madelyn and Robert– was very… very tall, nearly six inches over six feet. He was blonde with the same hair cut as his CO and Maxson, with a softer dusting of facial hair on his narrow, pointed jaw. His nose was long with a deep hook in it. His eyes were nearly black in color, she could tell despite his distance from her. He, honestly, was the less terrifying of the three, and even glanced at her long enough for her to see the severe burn scar down the right side of his face.

The last one was the roughest. He was a little shorter than the young man in front of him, but he was just as big as him, with plenty of scars running down and across his face. His blue eyes rivaled Nate's in how pale they were, but the thick, brown bars above them heavily shaded them.

"I… I don't know them," she said and fear flooded through her. She'd seen different colored flight suits, but never that combination, and these men were far more intimidating that anyone she'd seen on the Prydwen.

"Squire Dangerfield, your Elder has requested your presence, he is very disappointed in you," the man in front said, turning to her now. His brows pulled together and she frowned.

"Who are you?"

"I am Inquisitor Dangerfield," he said easily and she felt her heart skip a beat.

"Wha…? You're a…?" She didn't know if it was the rank or the name that caught her more off guard.

"I am of the Midwest Brotherhood of Steel," he explained. Madelyn's eyebrows leapt up and she looked at the other two men. She'd heard a little about their lost brothers and sisters, the faction was pretty detached from the coasts. She never expected to meet someone from the Midwest.

"Why're you here?"

"I was sent to retrieve you."

"Why you?" She followed him as he ignored her and headed toward the vertibird. The two men behind her climbed in first and he waited, glancing back at her with steel eyes.

"I volunteered. Your Elder is busy planning for our voyage to the Great Waste, and I had nothing better to do." He waved for her to get onto the bird. She glanced at it and then back at MacCready who was frowning deeply behind her.

"Nothing better to do?" she wasn't sure if that should offend her, then she blinked. "Voyage to where?"

"The Great Waste, the Midwest," he clarified and then motioned again. "I guaranteed your arrival in an hour, squire."

"How'd you find me?" she frowned.

"Do not make me order you to get on this vertibird, squire," his voice was deep and low. The Inquisitor's eyebrows pulled together and her gaze flickered to the men already buckled in. The blonde was frowning at her as if he were wishing she would just get in while the other was tilting his head back against the headrest looking like he wanted to sleep.

"I can't go, I have to–"

"Enough," Dangerfield stepped forward and picked her up easily, setting her on the bird before MacCready could blink. Then he climbed in and pushed her gently into a chair and fastened her in.

"Madelyn!"

The vertibird lifted off as the sniper leapt forward, the gust sending him back. He hit the ground hard and glared up at the steel bird.

Madelyn's stare was hard as she looked at the Inquisitor who grabbed onto the straps hanging from the ceiling. "Why the hell did you do that?" she snapped at him.

"I have orders. Bring you back alive, anything it takes." That sounded like something that Maxson would say.

"So you had to pick me up?" she growled.

"Better'an hurtin' ya, squire," the blonde at her side said softly with a very heavy accent. She glared at him. He was giving her a soft expression, though and she couldn't continue to look at him with so much anger.

"Hate me all you want, young Dangerfield," the Inquisitor said, his voice just loud enough she could hear it over the whirl of the vertibird. "But I am only following your Elder's orders, something that you have neglected to do, which has gotten you into this situation."

He was right, and she hated him more for it.

* * *

"Thank you, Inquisitor Dangerfield," Maxson sighed and Madelyn stared at his boots.

"Of course, Elder."

"You're dismissed."

"Ad Victoriam, sir." She could hear the three men snap into a salute behind her before leaving. Madelyn glanced over her shoulder to see them head up to the next deck, probably to get food. When they were gone, she was standing alone with Maxson on the Command Deck. Outside a radiation storm was rolling through, the thick green clouds making it impossible to see out the windows.

Neither said anything for a long time, and Madelyn found it hard to look anywhere other than at his boots. He was standing maybe ten feet in front of her. Her heart hammered in her chest and she resisted rubbing her forehead. He seemed like he was trying to slow his breathing.

"I cannot express to you how disappointed you have made me, Madelyn."

There it was. Her heart fell to the ground and she glanced up to see his face. Maxson was only twenty-one, nearly twenty-two now, but he looked in his late thirties. Stress had creased him beyond repair when he had anything other than a smile on his face, and he almost never smiled. Even with how close they were she wasn't able to make him laugh as much as she could her other friends. Now his heavy brows cast his blue-grey eyes into shadow, darkening them, keeping her from being able to read them. His nose was wrinkled in anger, scrunching the space between the brows and the bridge below it. His pout lips, hidden in a thick, off-black beard were curved down, finalizing the expression.

She felt the threat of tears in her eyes, but she fought them. There was still hope for her plan to work despite this. "I just wanted you to see I could do it," her voice was soft, but determined.

His jaw set and she could almost hear his teeth grind together. "So you thought you would show me how great a knight you could be by blatantly disobeying my orders? Lying to not only me, but to Lancer-Captain Kells, and _every_ other member of the Brotherhood of Steel? Your presence here is a lie, so do _not_ say that you have not lied to us all."

She swallowed. She'd never been yelled at by him before, not like he did other soldiers. He always spoke to her differently, but now, she felt like any other soldier standing in front of Elder Maxson as he ripped them a new one. There was nothing she could say or do to defend herself because his words were true. She had stunk onto the Prydwen, and came with it to the Commonwealth, spent the last year and a half lying right to the faces of anyone and everyone she could to reach her end goal.

How had she thought she could prove she would make a good soldier by lying and disobeying him? She couldn't believe herself.

Madelyn's head hung and she pressed her hands into her face. "I…" she shook her head. "I can't express how painful this was, Arthur," she breathed and met his gaze.

He frowned deeper at her. "Is that so? It was painful to sneak into my quarters and send Kells messages? It was painful to lie to Sentinel Walker and convince him it was my orders for him to mentor you? It was _painful_ to discard your uniform, dye your hair, and run around with a _mercenary_?" His voice rose until he was standing in front of her, close, holding her arms so that she had to keep looking right up at him.

Her heart hurt so bad. "Yes, yes it hurt."

"I can't believe you, Madelyn. Do you understand how I feel? When Kells told me that he got Nate's first report on your progress last night? He was so confused as to how I didn't know you were in the Commonwealth because I was the one who gave _him the orders you were to be with Sentinel Walker!_ " His voice shook her to her core. It wasn't even that loud, it was just so deep, it vibrated her, stung her ears. She shuddered and tears streamed down her cheeks as she stared at him in horror. Then she saw his face twist from anger to sorrow, "Do you understand how scared I was that something might have happened to you?"

Arthur's hands on her arms softened and she let out a long breath as he looked down at her with wet blue eyes. She'd seen him cry before, but never like this. "I'm so sorry, Artie," she breathed and reached up to wipe away the tear. He was so much bigger than her she had to stretch up.

"I cannot believe you would do this, Madelyn. I've been writing you… how…?" his breathing was uneven and she frowned.

"I convinced Merrin to write you so you wouldn't know I was here," she explained.

He shook his head as if he should have known. "So she knew."

"And… Reagan…" Madelyn's lips twitched and his eyes narrowed at her.

"Of course Reagan knew."

Madelyn let herself smile a little bit and wrapped her arms around Arthur. "I've waited so long to hug you. It hurt so bad being so close without being able to even look at you."

He squeezed her and sighed. "I am mildly impressed you were able to pull this off for so long." She smiled and looked up at him, then he smirked at her and she felt a new fear. "Despite that you're grounded."

"What?! But you can't! There's a problem in the Commonwealth, settlers are going missing," she explained and pulled away form him.

"I am fully aware, and Sentinel Walker and his Minutemen have been working on that."

"He's missing," she breathed, and then they both blinked. "Wait, you… said he gave his first report last night?" Maxson's brows pulled together and her heart hammered. "I… I don't think it was Nate who sent in that report, Arthur."

* * *

 **Some of you may be wondering 'Why are there Midwest Brotherhood soldiers?' 'What are they doing here?' 'Why is the East Coast Brotherhood planning on going west?'**

 **WELL. Those are excellent questions.**

 **It is also another story. (Reagan's to be exact, and I will begin posting that one when I wrap this one up! Hope it's caught your interest by now, I know I keep bringing it up, but my mind is made up.)**


	24. Righteous Authority

"Michael!" Madelyn ran down the hallway of the Recreational Deck, pushing against the doors to open them. "Michael Glass!" The door to the weight room flew open and smacked the wall, making everyone inside jump. The lancer she was looking for was on one of the benches, arms pressing against the bar weighing down on his chest. "Michael!"

He grunted, and his spotter snagged his bar before it could fall. "What the–Maddy?" he looked up, his ginger brows shifting.

"I need you to fly me to a settlement in the northwest," she panted and he groaned as his spotter put the bar down, and he got up, towering over her.

"I have orders not to fly you, virgin," he frowned and she glared.

"I'm not a," she coughed. "I'm not a virgin anymore, I'll have you know," she tried to stand straighter and his face went red. Then he smiled.

"Well damn, Reagan owes me some caps…." Apparently Reagan hadn't told him yet. She didn't have much in common with the lancer, so she only saw him briefly during meals in her time back on the airship. She'd also been spending her time trying to keep busy, doing research and helping Quinlan in Merrin's absence.

"Yeah, yeah, shut up, and get me to Sanctuary," she barked and pointed, grabbing his wrist.

"My orders–"

"Fuck your orders, he's going to kill him!"

"Who's going to kill who?" Michael pulled his hand back.

"Maxson! He's going to–" she stopped, her throat swelling and she felt sick. "I'm…" she pressed her hand to her mouth and Michael's ginger brows tugged together.

"You okay?"

"I'm…" she felt the burning of stomach acid rise from her stomach and she ran over to the trashcan.

"Oh, shit, Maddy," the lancer came over and winced. "Ew."

"What the fuck, Michael?"

"She just started throwing up," the lancer stepped away and someone pulled her green hair from her face.

"So you were just going to stand and watch?" Merrin's voice growled and her cool hand pressed to Madelyn's forehead. "You going to be okay, Maddy?" she asked when the squire straightened up, bracing herself on the wall.

"I… I don't know where that came from," she confessed and bit her lip. "I… I feel… fine, I felt fine," she corrected and looked at the scribe she hadn't seen in years. Merrin had been on a lengthy recon mission in the south near Quincy. "Oh, Merr, I have so much to tell you."

"Yes, yes you do, but right now we're getting you to Cade." The scribe started pulling her up the walkway, and Michael followed behind.

"So… Merrin, turns out Madelyn beat you to poppin' her cherry…"

"This is not the time, Michael," the scribe breathed, and Madelyn flushed.

"Think Maxson's on his way to kill the guy –if that's who she was talking about that is," he sighed and helped push Madelyn up the stairs toward the infirmary.

"I… I shouldn't have said anything," Madelyn sighed.

"Did the guy hurt you?" Merrin stopped them before they went in.

"No," the squire breathed. "No, I wanted it… I… really wanted it. I… I love him, and he loves me," she flushed and Merrin gave her a small smile.

"Then everything will be fine. Maxson won't hurt him if he shares your feelings," she promised and pushed the smaller girl through the doorway. Merrin was short, but Madelyn had her beat by an inch, and she was thinner and less muscled –somehow– than the scribe.

"Thanks, Merrin," she breathed, and Cade looked up from his paper work.

"Ah, Squire Dangerfield, it's been a while, what is it that I can do for you?" he asked, coming around.

"I… I suddenly threw up, for no reason, Knight–Captain, nothing other than that," she suddenly felt foolish for letting her friends bring her here.

"Come have a seat," he waved her over. "Can you tell me anything that might have done this? What have you eaten in the last twelve hours?"

"I… just some mirelurk with mutfruit jelly," she shifted, and watched as both Merrin and Michael shared a quizzical look at the combination. "Oh, and I've had seven Nuka Colas."

"Seven?" the medic's brows lifted and Madelyn's cheeks flushed.

"I've been craving sweet things," she confessed.

"Craving?" Cade raised an eyebrow at the word choice. "Have you been sexually active, squire?"

"What? I…" her brows lifted. "Just… once."

"How long ago?"

"Um," she counted the days and told him. He nodded and grabbed his clipboard. "But, he pulled out," she added.

"That still leaves the possibility of pregnancy, squire, you should know that," he frowned at her and then turned. "I'm going to run a test."

"Ho–how long will that take?"

"Twenty minutes at most," he promised and grabbed what he needed to begin the test while Madelyn sat between her friends on the bed, her heart hammering in her chest.

* * *

 _"_ _Oh! Back for another! Nate, I'm starting to think you have a crush on me," Rick's voice echoed and Nate pressed his hands against his face._

 _"_ _Get out of my head!"_

 _"_ _Maybe, soon, come on, you can wake up," he cackled. Everything was black, though, only Nate stood in the darkness. "You just have to wake up!_

 _"_ _I am trying!"_

 _"_ _No you're not, damn it, Nate, don't you want to see Maddy again? R.J.? That… thing?"_

 _John… he wanted to see John again. His heart hammered, and he shook his head. "John, I want to see John."_

 _"_ _Not the others?"_

 _"_ _Fuck you," he barked. "Of course I want to see them! But John is my life!" he shouted and pulled at the hair on the top of his head. Too hard, it hurt, and then he tried to let go, and he couldn't._

 _His roots screamed in protest. "Wake up, Natie!" Rick's voice barked in his left ear._

 _"_ _Let me go!" Nate yelled, his throat burning with the effort._

 _"_ _Wake, the fuck, up!" Rick jerked Nate's head, and he woke up, the brightness of lights blinding him._

Nate blinked and squeezed his eyes shut.

"Christ, about fucking time," Rick barked, and let go of Nate's hair. The Sentinel looked up. He was lying on his back with his arms and legs strapped down to a table. He couldn't lift his head.

"Where am I?" he couldn't see passed the light over him, the room around him was dark other than that light.

"What did I say before about asking questions?" Rick asked lowly.

"I think he's earned an explanation, Jacob," a new voice spoke, this one was softer.

"If you say so," Rick sounded unconvinced and stepped into the light, standing over Nate with his killer grin.

"Your name's not Rick either?" he asked, his brows pulling together.

"Nope, I'm Jacob Glass, not that you'd know who that is," he frowned with a sigh before tilting his head. "You're at our Headquarters, by the way."

"And where's that?"

"In the west," he shrugged. "You wouldn't know it."

"What am I doing here?" Nate gritted his teeth.

"Oh… Natie," he sighed and shook his head. "I told you before, I have people to feed. And… I have to admit, you're quite delicious," he smirked and turned away. Nate's heart pounded in his chest and he fought against his restraints, realizing he couldn't move his limbs.

"Oh my God…" he breathed, his head going light. "No…" he shook his head and tried to lift it, to see down himself, to see what they'd taken from him.

"Oh, shh, shhh," Jacob returned and lifted a slab of meat. "It's just your… shit, was this his bicep or thigh?" he asked over his shoulder and Nate felt a whimper rise from his throat.

"You're sick…"

"Oh, only if we eat certain parts of you," Jacob agreed and nodded, holding up the meat and sniffing it. "I think… it's the thigh, yeah," he nodded and took a bite. "Definitely thigh."

Stomach acid burned Nate's throat and he coughed, choking on it as he couldn't turn his head.

"Shit," Jacob turned away and returned in a moment with a rag. "Don't go dying on us just yet, big guy, you stay fresh longer if we just keep carving off you," he smiled and Nate threw up again. "Oh, stop it."

"You're going to die…" he promised the man who was already nodding.

"Yeah, yeah, I know, Maxy's got his men after me already. But don't worry, he's a little… distracted," he smirked. "Madelyn's back on the Prydwen, but… oh, I have word Maxy's on his way northwest… what's in the northwest that he might be interested in?" Jacob tapped his chin. "You think he learned Maddy and Mac did the nasty?"

Nate's brows jerked together.

"Oh, you didn't know?" he laughed before he could stop himself. "That's right, you were here. Yes, they were bumping uglies while you've been trapped here." He shook his head. "They haven't found that abomination yet, incase you're wondering," Jacob added and Nate felt his heart stop.

"'Abomination'?"

Jacob's face twisted and his brows jerked together, then he wiped his face clean. "That thing," he clarified.

"I know who you're talking about, but only the Brotherhood call them that," he growled. "You were a member of the Brotherhood of Steel?"

Jacob straightened up and then a hand rested on his shoulder, squeezing the blue fabric of his coat. "Go, Jacob, before you ruin everything."

"Yes, Mother," he turned away and disappeared.

"Who are you?" Nate asked, his tone not all that threatening, but not at all submissive.

"I am simply called 'Mother' around here," she said and came into view. Nate had expected an older woman, but she was only around his own age. She had bloodshot eyes and frazzled hair, and looked very different from Jacob's crisp and clean appearance.

"Well, I'm not calling you that," he glared at her.

"I suppose you wouldn't want to, not after your son wished to be called 'Father' among his own," she sighed and tilted her head. "You see, I am Mother because I take care of all my children, I do not claim to make them family through biology, but through the care and protection we offer each other."

"By eating each other?"

"Not each other, just… outsiders," she corrected, and sighed again, looking tired. "This would have been so much easier if you would have just stuck to your settlement, stayed with your… disgusting pet, and those closest to you."

"And sit idly by and allow you to kill and eat my people?"

"You were going to retire, yes? After you learned what happened to them?" she tilted her blonde head at him. "They wouldn't be your people then, and you wouldn't have to worry about them. You wouldn't be here…." Her hands trailed over his shoulder and he stopped feeling her just after the joint. Christ, his left arm was gone completely.

He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to focus his breathing. There was nothing he could do about what they've taken from him now. All he could do was find a way to get out of here and warn his people. "I would always worry about them."

"Of course you would," she sighed and he met her gaze, hazy blue to bloodshot brown.

"What all did you take from me?" he breathed.

"Both legs and arms to the torso," she said easily and he nodded, closing his eyes.

"I thought I was strapped down."

"Oh, no, just at the neck and belly," she sighed and he nodded. "You're one of the best we've tasted…. I think it's because you're prewar… We'll have to open up some of those cryopods in that vault of yours and see if they're still good," she straightened up and he swallowed. She started to turn away. "You should rest, take all this in."

"Why not just kill raiders?" Nate asked suddenly.

"What?"

"If you would have taken raiders instead of settlers, you could have done this… longer, at least, before someone noticed," he breathed.

"Pickman's got a claim," she shrugged and Nate squeezed his eyes shut. He should have killed that sick man a long time ago. The man used raider corpses as 'art' and made paintings out of their blood and bits. "Besides, sheep taste better than wolves."

Then the woman left, and Nate was alone with his thoughts. He could just see he was in a space that was about the size of an interrogation room on a table with concrete walls around him. There were no windows, just the door that Jacob and the woman came in and left from.

Tears dripped down from his eyes toward his temples then down the stubble on the sides of his head. He wasn't getting out of this alive, and he knew it. He just hoped he could see John one more time before he died. And Maddy. He had so much to tell her.

But John… John he wanted to see more than anything else. His heart pounded and the tears picked up. He had so many things to say, to explain, to apologize for. But mostly, he wanted to make sure he knew that he loved him, more than his own life.

* * *

"I'm…" Madelyn gaped down at herself and then returned her grey eyes to the Knight-Captain who stood in front of Merrin and Michael. The scribe scratched the back of her head and the lancer bit his lip. It had only been five minutes, but it felt like an hour.

"So… first time and you get knocked up? Nice going Mads…" Glass breathed and Merrin bumped her elbow against the man, though Maddy would have rather her do it harder.

"You are pregnant, squire," Cade said and lifted his clipboard. "Now, I will have to inform Elder Maxson, and your emergency contact… Elder… Maxson," he sighed and nodded. "Yes, I forgot about that."

"He's… not on board," she breathed and touched her face. How could she…? Robert had… he'd…. Her cheeks flushed and she bit her lip. She shouldn't tell him. He was probably so mad at her for leaving. He would only be more mad…. She pressed her hands into her forehead. "I need a moment."

"Of course," the medic turned to give her some privacy.

"You okay, Maddy?" Merrin came up and rested a hand on her.

"I… I wasn't expecting this. This means I'll… I'll be sent back to the Capital, and Robert won't get to see his baby," her eyes grew wet and Merrin shook her head.

"You have options," she started.

"I'm not going to get rid of it," she said and then swallowed. "I'd rather leave the Brotherhood than Robert."

Merrin and Michael's brows shot up. "You… you sure, Maddy?" the lancer's voice shook. "You've… out of all of us, you've always been the one to get so…." He didn't seem to know what to say. "I don't think I've ever heard you doubt the Brotherhood."

"I have had a lot of reasons to since being with the Sentinel," she breathed and pushed off the bed. "Michael, you're flying me to Sanctuary!" she shouted and the lancer stiffened.

"I _can't,_ Mads, I have _orders_ ," he protested and she glared at him.

"Damn it, Michael, stop being such a pussy," Reagan's voice came from around the corner, and she stepped into the medbay with Dangerfield a couple steps behind. He stopped in the doorway and waited. "I'll fly her if you're not going to."

"You can't, you'll be stealing a vertibird–" Glass took a step toward the knight who glared at him.

"You going to tell a pregnant lady no?" she raised a brown brow at him and his jaw set. "Besides, I don't have orders not to fly her there, so I would only be committing a level five offense," she shrugged.

"Reagan," Madelyn's brows lifted in surprise. "You'd… for me?"

"'Course I would, Lynnie, you're my friend, and you need me," she shrugged. "Plus, I can't let Arthur hurt that little sniper, he's far too cute," she chuckled and Madelyn felt her heart swell.

"Okay, come on, let's go."

Cade let out a long, loud sigh, "I know at this point my opinion is void, but I have to at least tell you this is a horrible idea."

"Duly noted, Knight-Captain," Reagan saluted him and Madelyn copied. As they passed Dangerfield he also offered the man a fist-over-heart.

"Ad Victoriam," he breathed and fell in behind Madelyn and Reagan. Merrin and Michael were behind him. "My men are on the Flight Deck, awaiting my orders."

"Why are they there?" Madelyn asked.

"I was about to go hunting, seeing that your Elder has neglected to give me any other orders," he then gave a lose gesture to Reagan. "I was in the middle of asking Knight to accompany me when she heard you."

"You're coming with?"

"You wish for your Sentinel to be found, do you not?" he lifted a brow and Madelyn smiled.

"Thank you."

"Thank me when he is found," Dangerfield said and they stopped on the Flight Deck. Knights Yaider and Jupiter were waiting near by. "Change of plans, we are hunting down the sons-of-bitches that took the Sentinel," he informed the knights who both smiled, ready.

Reagan walked up to the Primair –Michael's Vertibird– and climbed in. The lancer ran up, "Oh, God, Reagan, tell me you remember how to do this," he breathed, his face red.

"You want to be my co-pilot and make sure I get it there safe?" she tilted her head and he rubbed his face.

"I can't…" he grabbed the sides of the bird and then sighed. "Fine! Fine! I'm fucking coming!"

"Save that kind of talk for the bedroom," Reagan chuckled and buckled herself in, starting the bird up like she hadn't been away from it for nearly six years.

Dangerfield and his men climbed in and Madelyn turned to look at Merrin. "Are you coming?" she raised an eyebrow.

The scribe looked at the rest of the party, and then sighed, "I might as well at this point, right?"

Madelyn smiled and they climbed into the bird together.

"Maybe… I should fly and you be the copilot, Knight?" Glass said, his face still red.

"Then you'll get in trouble for flying her," Reagan pointed out and he sighed, looking very uncomfortable.

"Fine."

"Come on, you never forget how to fly one of these," she smirked and they dropped from the Prydwen.

The flight wasn't that long, but it felt like forever. Maxson had to be about ten minutes ahead of them. Madelyn's heart pounded, and it made the hour feel like a day. At her side Merrin held her hand and squeezed it, and on her other Knight Yaider gave off a very comforting heat. He gave her small conversation, little comments about the wasteland, and mentioned comparisons to the Midwest. She tried to let it distract her, but seeing Dangerfield standing, holding onto the straps in the ceiling to steady himself while he watched the knight and lancer fly, reminded her of what they were doing and where they were going.

"Here we are," Reagan's voice obviously had a smile in it.

There was already a vertibird parked near the Red Rocket Station, and the lancer was giving them a very, very curious look when they landed beside him. Glass let out a long, loud breath. "Christ, we made it, I can't…"

"Michael, I was the best flyer in my class," Reagan glared at him and then stood up once she was freed from her belts. "Come on, Lynnie, time to save your boyfriend from our fearless leader."

Madelyn and Merrin fell out of the vertibird and were followed by the more agile Knights and Inquisitor.

"Knight, we will start on locating the Sentinel. If we find anything, we will return here and summon a vertibird," Dangerfield told Reagan, displaying a smoke grenade.

"Don't bother coming back here, just get a safe distance away and call it, okay? I'll be here with Glass and we'll come get you," she said and his brows slid together before he nodded and turned to his knights. Then the three were off at a surprisingly fast pace, falling in sync with each other naturally.

Madelyn smiled at her friend, "He's cute."

Reagan's brows shot up, "Yeah, very…. Since when do you notice that kind of thing?" her eyes narrowed.

"Since you like him," she retorted and Reagan's cheeks flushed.

"Hey, we have a mission," she pushed the squire into turning around and starting toward Sanctuary.

Madelyn picked up her pace and ran, hearing Reagan and Merrin behind her. Michael was probably staying with the bird with the other lancer. There was only one person at the gate, but they were distracted. "Hey!" Madelyn called up and they looked over at her. After a pause, they opened the gate, recognizing her. And when the large doors parted, she was able to see why he was distracted.

Maxson was standing chest-to-chest with Robert, and Madelyn's heart stopped. They were about to kill each other, she could see it. Her eyes watered and she ran forward as Maxson's fist drew back and Robert started taking a step back, his arms coming up.

"No! Stop! _Please_!" Madelyn screamed and hit the Elder, knocking him sideways, sending her to the ground when he stumbled.

" _Madelyn_?" he growled, looking back at her. "I _thought I told you_ –!"

"Maddy, love," Robert slid around Maxson, bending to help her to her feet and look at her to see if she was hurt. She was in her squire's uniform, so she didn't have anything but a few new bruises from hitting the concrete so hard.

"I'm okay, Robert," she breathed and met his eyes. He looked so sad, like he'd been upset, maybe even crying. She swallowed against the lump in her throat and gripped his sleeves. "I'm here."

Out of the corner of her eye she saw Maxson straighten and Reagan come up beside him. She tugged on his beard and he glanced at her. "Hey, so I know this might not be the best time, but I sort of stole a vertibird… so if you'd like to yell at me instead of Maddy…."

Madelyn and Robert looked at the Elder whose face went as red as a tato. "I… cannot believe this," he growled, looking between Reagan and Madelyn before spotting Merrin behind the knight. The look of betrayal on his face turned the scribe's cheeks pink.

"I couldn't let you hurt Maddy's baby daddy," Reagan smirked, and there were a collection of gasps.

"You're…?" Robert looked at her, his hands holding her at her hips.

"You're pregnant?" Maxson's voice was low, and threatening.

Madelyn swallowed and looked at her brother, "I… just found out, while you were gone." Her grey eyes shifted to Robert and she smiled little. "I guess our first time was all it took…."

His lips curved up and he gazed at her with his MacCready blue eyes. They were a wonderful shade, the kind that only he and Duncan had. She hoped their baby would have those same blue eyes. "We're going to have a baby…?" he smiled at her, his hands on her sliding behind her to pull her to him.

Madelyn's throat closed and she nodded up at him, holding onto his mismatched sleeves tighter. Everything around her faded. It was just the two of them with a child growing between them. Robert leaned down and rested his forehead against hers, closing his eyes and she felt tears sting hers.

"I love you, Madelyn," he whispered, and she let out a slow breath, saying the words back with every fiber of her being.

"Artie, I swear to God if you break them up I'm shaving your entire body," Madelyn heard Reagan threaten and she was drawn back from her high of being in her lover's arms.

The squire looked at her Elder and felt her heart beat against her chest, threatening to punch its way out. He was glaring, but that wasn't uncommon from him, and to her surprise, he didn't look all that angry. His brows just hung over his eyes in the way they did when he thought, and when he saw something he didn't like. She'd seen him give that look to a lot of people, even her. With his shoulders high and back, his chest out and strong, and his jaw set tight under his beard, he could have made someone who didn't know him like she did shit themselves.

Robert's arms around her tightened and she glanced up to see her sniper giving her brother the hardest glare she'd ever seen him display. His pointed jaw was locked shut, straining against the muscles of his neck, and the pucker between his brows was pressed hard enough to add new creases. His hat sent shadows over his face, giving him a different kind of intimidation than Maxson had. While Arthur had authority, Robert had a look that screamed stealth. One would come right at you, and the other you'd never see coming.

"Madelyn," Arthur started, his voice low, and his jaw still tight. Robert's fingers flexed on her back, gripping her uniform. "I have to admit I never considered you would choose to be with someone who wasn't in the Brotherhood. I regret to say I am mildly disappointed," he breathed and relaxed some, and Madelyn felt a swell of new tears come to her eyes. "But at this point there isn't much I can do, is there?"

"I love him, Arthur, I told you…"

"I would have reacted the same no matter who he was," he informed her and she pulled away from Robert to go to her brother. She threw her arms around him and he held her against his huge chest. "You're my little sister, pup, I can't let guys think they can just have you," his hand ran over her hat, and he sighed. "I trust your judgment of him. But I will need to form an opinion of him on my own." He was speaking slowly, purposefully, and she looked up to see he was staring at the sniper, his brows heavy.

"You'll like him if you give him a chance," she breathed and he glanced down at her.

"I cannot allow you to remain on the Prydwen while you are pregnant. We have protocol, and it says I have to send you back to the Citadel," he frowned at her and she felt her heart rate pick up.

"I… I don't want to leave him," she swallowed against the lump in her throat, and then Robert stepped forward.

"What if I join the Brotherhood?" he asked, and Madelyn and Maxson looked at him. "I'm the best shot in the Commonwealth, and… that's not boasting," he tried to smirk, but he was nervous. "Ask anyone," he cleared his throat.

Reagan grinned, "Yeah, nearly got me in the head."

"Nearly?" Arthur turned to her.

"I heard the action snap, if he would have been farther away I'd be dead, and… we both know how hard I am to kill," she rested her hand on her hip and Merrin smiled a little behind her.

"When was he firing on you?"

"That's not the point," Reagan's brows pulled together. "He's a good shot, and we could use him."

"No…" Madelyn breathed. Everyone looked at her. "No… he…" she looked at Robert. He was going to join for her, but he didn't want to, she could see it in his eyes. He didn't want Duncan to be a squire. He didn't want to work with the Brotherhood. He was willing to make himself unhappy to be with her and their child. She couldn't bring herself to make him unhappy when she knew another option. "No," she repeated, and met Maxson's confused blue eyes.

"Maddy?"

She swallowed and took a step back from Maxson and removed her hat, her green head bright in the light of the midday sun. "Discharge me," she said and met his gaze. "Honorable or not, I… I'm done with the Brotherhood. I'm staying here in the Commonwealth, and… I'm staying here with Robert and Duncan."

Maxson's brows furrowed and his jaw set. Reagan and Merrin gaped at her, and looked between their Elder and the squire.

"Madelyn?" Robert's voice was low behind her. She looked back at him and saw his face twisted in confusion. "What're you doing?"

"You would never be happy with us," she sighed. "I can't let you sacrifice everything, especially your happiness, when there's something I can do."

"You… would leave them, for me?" his brows arched up at the center and she nodded.

"I know I said I wouldn't… but… I don't want to leave the Commonwealth," she breathed and looked back at Maxson. "If I stay here, I can still see all of you, I'll just be a vertibird trip away, instead a month of travel…" Madelyn frowned and bit her lip, meeting her brother's narrowed eyes. "Say something, please, Arthur."

Maxson opened his mouth to say something, but the scampering of feet and a child yelling cut him off, "Mommy!"

Madelyn turned to see Duncan running as fast as he could to them, Robert knelt and scooped him up before he could reach Madelyn and Arthur, though. The small boy protested, pushing against his father's chest.

"Mommy! I missed you!" he reached for her and her heart melted. She'd been away from him for weeks, and it killed her.

"Shh, precious, I'm here," she waved at him, and looked back at Maxson. His blue eyes were settled on the boy.

"He looks like you," he stated.

"He's too old to be mine, you know that," she said and stepped a little closer to him. "I love him like he's mine, though. His name's Duncan MacCready."

"Duncan…" he breathed slowly and looked down at her. "The one you'll have will look just like him."

She smiled and nodded hopefully. "I'd like for it to grow up here… not in the Capital, not like I did, or like Robert did," she shook her head. "The Commonwealth… it's different," she felt a sting of tears and she reached out, taking on of her Elder's hands in both of hers. "It's safe… here, in Sanctuary."

He nodded, looking around before letting out a sigh. "You kill me, pup," he breathed.

"Daddy, I'm pup," Duncan whispered to Robert behind her, and she bit back a grin when Maxson's brows tugged together.

"You're sure that you want this? If you ever decided to join back up you'd have to start over, you couldn't be able to pick up where you left off," he warned her.

"Pick back up as a squire?" she smirked at him. "Arthur, if I came back I'd _gain_ rank. And if I came back you might actually promote me."

"If I promote you would you stay?" he asked, his face twisted in hurt. She felt her heart pound against her chest.

She'd wanted so long to be promoted. She had been ready, and she knew that the moment it was offered she would take it. But now, Madelyn hesitated. "No," she finally breathed. "I've made up my mind, Artie, I need to stay here. And we need to find Nate."

He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "Okay," he said, his voice low and little more than a breath. "You, Squire Madelyn Alexandria Dangerfield, are relieved of your rank and duties. You are no longer a sister of the Brotherhood of Steel. By my authority, as Elder Arthur Maxson, of the East Coast Brotherhood of Steel, I reward you an honorable discharge." Then he turned to Merrin and Reagan. "Witnesses?"

"I, Knight Reagan Knight, witness the honorable discharge of Squire Madelyn Dangerfield."

"I, Scribe Merrin Debrie, witness the honorable discharge of Squire Madelyn Dangerfield."

"Thank you, Elder, Knight, Scribe," Madelyn nodded to each of them. "It has been an honor."

Maxson's gaze turned back to her and he relaxed, looking tired. "You, of course, are always welcome to the Prydwen and the Citadel," he stated and swallowed.

"I'm not going far," she stepped forward. She needed to hug him again, and he needed it too. Her arms slipped under his coat and she held onto him tightly, barely able to tough her fingers together on his back. The tips just brushed against each other, nothing like when she held Robert. "You can always visit me here, or… where ever I end up. I'll be sure to tell you, Artie," she smiled up at him and he gazed down at her lovingly, and stroked her green hair from her face.

"I'll check in as often as I can spare," then he nodded. "I'll get you a personal radio so we can communicate." She grinned. "And… you'll have the baby on the Prydwen?" he asked looking down at her.

"Um," Reagan cleared her throat. "We're going… to the Midwest, sir?"

Maxson's jaw set and he frowned down at Madelyn. She tried to comfort him. "I'll go to whatever Commonwealth doctor you decide, I promise, and… when you get back, we'll visit, or you can," she shrugged, smiling up at him.

He nodded, but didn't look like he fully accepted the idea. "I would feel better if you went to one of our outposts and had it there."

"Of course," she smiled. "I'll be okay," she promised and squeezed his muscled form.

"I know, I have to worry about you," Maxson looked passed her at Robert holding his son. "But… I suppose that's your job now, isn't it?"

"Yes, sir," Robert stated, holding Duncan against his side.

"Will you two be getting married?" his eyes narrowed slightly, and Madelyn slapped his chest, but Robert chuckled. She looked at him to see him meet her grey eyes.

"If she'll have me."

There were a couple of squeals from Reagan and Merrin who grabbed onto each other and did a little dance. "Oh, that's too cute, he proposed with a kid," Reagan chuckled.

Madelyn's own face was twisted in shock. She was suddenly very aware that most of Sanctuary was standing in doorways and on the sidewalks, watching everything that had just happened. They had been there this whole time, whispering and pointing, but she'd only noticed just this moment.

Her mouth went dry and she was nodding before she realized she was. Then she looked up to see Arthur tilt his head. He was waiting for her to verbalize.

"Yes, of–of course, Robert," Madelyn looked back at her sniper and ran to him, closing the distance in only four, long, leaping steps. Then her arms circled him and their boy.

"Mommy said yes! I told you, daddy," Duncan smiled and patted Madelyn's head. She smiled at the boy and tugged him down so she could kiss his cheek, making him giggle before she looked up at Robert. He smiled at her, his blue eyes soft.

"I only feared you wouldn't because I shot you," he breathed and before Maxson could say something about that, she threw her arms around his neck and pulled his tall, lean form down to kiss her. He sat Duncan down on his feet and held her, holding her against his chest and straightening so that her legs dangled. "I love you, Madelyn."

"I love you, too, Robert."


	25. Feeding the Troops

"Hi there," Jacob came up, resting his hands on either side of Nate's head. Nate let his eyes slide open for a moment, then he closed them again, trying to relax. "Oh, don't be that way."

"Here to cut me up some more?" Nate asked, keeping his eyes closed. It had only been a few hours since the woman left. He'd been counting.

"Nah, we're trying to make you last, least until we get some more of the prewar meat to test our theory, but they won't be as good as you," he sighed. "You're fresh."

"Thanks, I bathe twice a week."

"More than most of the Commonwealth," Jacob scoffed and straightened up. "You have questions?"

"And you have answers."

"I'm curious what your first one will be," Jacob confessed and Nate opened his eyes to look at him.

"You said they hadn't found John yet, you were lying," he said and Jacob's brows tugged together.

"I wasn't, actually, why would you think that?" Jacob was a great liar, but it was too easy for Nate to see an honest truth. John hadn't been found yet, and it hurt him.

"How long have I been here?"

"That's your first question?" Jacob grinned. "You're just worried about that… _thing_ ," he growled the word, but Nate knew it was to avoid using the other word now. He waited, and Jacob sighed. "Four weeks and two days, if you want anything more exact you'd have to look at the ledgers."

"You keep track of when you bring people in?" his brows quirked and Jacob smiled.

"And who," he added, pulling up a chair that sat out of his field of view. "Mother told me to answer all your questions at my digression, but she knows you aren't leaving here alive, so might as well set you at ease, it'll make you taste better," he tilted his head and resting his chin on his hand.

"Why did she stop you form talking before then?" he lifted a dark brow.

"She had to see the status of your friends. Turns out the Maxy hasn't sent those Midwest hounds on us yet, so we have at least two more weeks before any of his vertibirds even come close to here, and another week before a squad makes it this far west." Jacob grinned and ran a hand through his black curls. "She expects you won't make it till this time next week. Not with how delicious you are."

"You know, you say you're not interested in men, but you sure know how to talk dirty to one," Nate smiled and Jacob jerked up, standing quick enough to send his chair to the ground behind him.

"You're disgusting."

"I thought you said I was delicious?" Nate braced for the punch that came down right to his nose, cracking it, and sending blood out over his mouth. "Bet it wasn't that hard for you to draw me in, either," he grinned and gave him a wink. "I know I'm a looker, but you stared at me too right to have been faking."

The next punch was calculated, and right to his nose again, but the angle blacked him out. Before his mind went dark, though, he grinned.

* * *

Nate came to and the woman was standing above him. He groaned slightly and closed his eyes. "Good morning, Nathaniel."

"What should I call you? I'm starting to think 'Bitch' is appropriate."

"You don't think that's a little strong?" she tilted her head at him, her lips turning into a disapproving frown.

"Cunt works for me too," he breathed and she slapped him.

"I told you it's hard not to hit him, Mother," Jacob's voice came from the other side of the room and Nate sighed.

"So you're Cunt and he's Dick," Nate tilted his head as much as he could at the woman above him. "That… means he fucks you right?"

This time the woman knocked him out.

* * *

"We know what you're doing," Jacob sighed when Nate opened his eyes and blinked against the light of the lamp over his head.

"Is that so?"

"Don't worry, I took a Calm-X, you're not getting to me this time," he came over. "I have a couple questions, though."

"I thought I got to ask the questions?"

"You missed your chance. You pissed off Mother."

"Oh… she making you sleep on the couch now?" Jacob didn't even blink, he just tilted his head.

"Preston's your second in command, but he won't step up and take the lead to the Minutemen if you… die, so who will?"

"You don't already know, oh wise one?" Nate gasped in mock shock.

"I know a lot of things, but my knowledge on the Minutemen is rather… limited since they don't have much…" he searched for the word. "Experience, as of late."

"Of course, besides, hard to look at the Minutemen when you're sucking Brotherhood dick, am I right?" Nate lifted a brow for confirmation.

"Wouldn't know, but… I'm only mildly curious, but did you ever kneel for Maxson? I bet he'd be into that; he probably has a dick shoved up his ass every night."

"Used to be yours, wasn't it? And that's why you're so jealous now?" Nate frowned in sympathy.

"Cute," Jacob grunted and folded his arms over his chest. He must really have taken a Calm-X. Well shit. "You going to answer me?"

"You first," Nate narrowed his eyes. "You're Brotherhood?"

"Seeing that you're Sentinel and you've not heard my name what would you think?" he raised a brow. "Don't you think you would have heard of me if I was?"

"See, I don't know everyone on the ship… I had a pilot once, flew me to Fort Strong," he explained. "His name was Glass, he was a Lancer-Sergeant, but that couldn't have been you. He was a ginger," Nate watched his face and noticed the wince before he frown and composed himself. "That was your brother, wasn't it?"

"Half," he choked and stopped himself, swallowing. His jaw snapped shut and he looked away with furrowed brows.

"Half brother… probably your dad, right? Sleeping around with anyone and everyone? Who's the bastard? You…?" Nate lifted a brow and then nodded. "It's him. Wonder how his relationship is with your father now?"

"You don't know what you're talking about," Jacob growled and leaned over him. "Tell me who takes over the Minutemen after you!"

"No one, I never lined anyone up, it could be anyone," he said simply and shrugged. "What does it matter? So you can grab them too?"

"Without a leader, they stay out of our way," he breathed, looking like he was trying to calm himself.

"Uh… huh, well, looks like with me gone they're still causing you trouble."

"Not as much so as those Brotherhood bastards."

Nate narrowed his gaze at the man in front of him. "Why'd you leave?"

"What?"

"Why'd you leave the Brotherhood?"

"I'm not answering any more of your questions, Natie," he growled and went to the door.

"Give your mommy a kiss for me. Right on the mouth, with tongue," Nate called after him. The door slammed shut. He sighed and closed his eyes, wishing the man would have knocked him out again so he didn't have to lie here and stare at the ceiling.

* * *

Nate was able to hear conversations going on out in the hall when he quieted his breathing. From what he gathered, he was father west than a Nuka World Monorail station, which was constantly flowing with some odd raiders coming and leveling the Commonwealth. It had, apparently, only started within the last few weeks, after a massive group of them took over the Park and slaughtered most of the traders that were there.

He frowned at that, wondering if anyone would be able to stop them.

He also learned that Mother was growing ill, and so were a lot of the older members. All but Jacob. There were some suspicious whispers about him Nate decided to keep note of, and continued to listen as the time without contact wore on.

Gossip. Singing. Drunken speech. More comments on the same things he already knew. And talk of Midwest hounds.

Nate perked up and frowned. The man outside his door was speaking with someone else.

"Yeah, I just got off guard duty, I saw the sons of bitches, there were three, when I told Jacob he said they were the Midwest hounds that that the Elder sent after that little bitch with the merc." He laughed throatily, and then continued, "Those two followed the trail Jacob had me and Gill make out east, all the way to the end. How stupid, right?"

"Wow," the door guard sighed in amazement. "So… what about these hounds then? We… gonna get 'em?"

"They were already off before I got to tellin' Jacob, but that means those Brotherhood dicks are gonna be here within the week. He's talking about us moving, but Mother thinks we should dig in and close up, hope we're too much trouble."

"They ain't gonna let their boss in here go so easy…."

"That's just it, he's the only brother we got, right? She was talkin' about making a truce if nothing else, give them him and get them to back off. Why would they fight for the Minutemen if they aren't affected?"

"Oh… but… we haven't all gotten to try him yet?"

"You'd rather get shot by laser rifles?"

"No."

Nate's heart pounded and he gritted his teeth. Would Maxson abandon the attack just because they handed him over? He'd like to think not, especially when his arms and legs were taken and eaten.

"Well, wait a minute, why don't we just shoot them back? The mezzers worked on those settlers," the door guard broke in and Nate's brows furrowed. 'Mezzer'?

"These aren't settlers, dumby, these are Brotherhood dicks that have armor and are trained to fight. They won't be so easy to subdue, and soon as they saw some of their brothers and sisters turning on them they'd only get harder and harder to pacify," he sighed.

"I… I'm sorry, I guess I didn't think about it like that. I just remember those bitches at Oberland were so easy to get, just walked up and bam, had them all following us like a bunch of puppies," he chuckled and stopped when the other hit him.

"Shut up and leave the planning to Jacob. It's the only thing his deserter ass is good for. I still can't believe they let one of _them_ in…."

"He's been here longer than any of us," the door guard protested.

"I know, dumby, but how the fuck did they even get him? How he just up and decides he's tired of living cush in that airship, to live down… _here_ in this mess?"

"I heard he was a pilot, and he crashed. They saved him in exchange for his help, and he just stuck around after that."

"You're an idiot."

"It's what I heard."

The conversation ended then and one of them left. Nate had a lot to think about then. He didn't know how much of the conversation was reliable, but considering neither seemed to know or care if he could hear, there really was no reason to think it was set up. So Jacob had been here longer than the rest? But not the first. It stood to reason that 'Mother' was an original and recruited Jacob. Maybe he was the one to get them to where they were now? That stood to reason, seeing that planning was the only thing he was apparently good for.

Nate swallowed and stared at the ceiling, listening to the hall again, but he wanted Jacob to come back in here and give him some more information. He wanted to know what 'Midwest hounds' meant. He'd been in the Brotherhood for over two years and sure some of their terms were different than prewar military, but he had never heard a Midwest anything mentioned.

Nate's jaw set and he took long, slow breaths through his nose, trying to keep his thoughts away from his body. It was too easy for him to drift back and try to wiggle a finger or toe just to prove that they were lying to him, that they were still there. He knew they weren't, but he could feel it sometimes and it only made it worse.

His heart picked up and he bit down on his lip to distract him. He wished that Jacob had just knocked him out again…. At least in his dreams he would be able to use his arms and legs.


	26. Fire Support

Madelyn's heart pounded as she ran from Nate's house to the medbay. She left Robert with Duncan and Shaun, they would follow behind her shortly. Her fiancé needed to explain to Shaun what was about to happen.

Madelyn had only needed the words 'found him' to reach her ears for her to be out the door at a sprint. She didn't care who 'him' was, but she knew what she found would be nothing short of relief. At least he's here now. In whatever state. Whoever it is. They are here now. Safe.

She pushed through the small crowd outside of the house that had been turned into a doctor's office. People grunted and moved when she started swearing and making death threats. She was small, but fuck if she wasn't going to get in there and see who had been found.

Reagan grabbed her and Madelyn nearly punched her friend right in the stomach. "What?!" she spun on the knight. Reagan's brows pulled together and her gaze locked on the smaller woman's curled fists.

"I need you to take a deep breath, okay?" she frowned at her. "It… took four stimpaks, and he's…" her honey eyes were hard, but sympathetic. It was John. They'd found John. Merrin wasn't here because he was an abomination, and Reagan wasn't all that torn up about his state of being because he was a ghoul.

"I need to see him," Madelyn pulled her arm away from her friend and went down the hall to the room that would have been a bedroom back before the war.

The larger of the bedrooms was converted to a recovery space with numerous beds spaced out, while the room across from it had a single bed with machines and equipment lined up on either side. There was Hancock, lying on his back with his eyes closed and his hands at his sides over the blanket that was pulled up to his stomach. His wrists were bruised and bloody, and she swore she could see bone and muscle at some parts. Then she noticed his left ring finger was missing.

He looked horrible. He was withered down to nothing, even more so than he had been before, and his skin had taken on a pale hue. He looked… like a mummy from one of Quinlan's books. She had never seen someone so… disgusting looking.

"You shouldn't be here," the doctor sighed and stepped around her.

"Is… he going to live?" she asked, swallowing.

"I cannot guarantee either way yet," he frowned at her and looked back at Hancock. "He hasn't consumed food or water in at least two weeks, but I would wager longer with the exception of rain water, and he was exposed to the elements. He was bound by the wrists and… his finger crudely removed with a hunting knife." He sighed and returned his gaze to her. "If he would have been human he would have died. The fact he is a ghoul is the only reason that he made it." She came into the room and noticed a golden band on the table beside him.

"Is… that his ring?"

"It was found near his severed finger. It appears whoever took the General was using Hancock as… leverage," he checked the ghouls pulse with a light hand to the man's neck as his wrists were raw. "As long as he's here, I am confident he will make it through this. The worst should be behind him."

"Now we have to find Nate," she said and he nodded. Madelyn stood beside John's bed and stood close, resisting the urge to take his hand. He was breathing, but it was labored. His eyes were closed, but they looked to be darting around. "Will he wake up?"

"It's hard to say," was her reply. "His condition isn't quite stable yet, but it should improve."

Madelyn nodded and bit her lip. "Can… I stay here with him?"

"It's probably not the best idea," the doctor frowned and she nodded.

"I'll come back, then," she leaned down and pressed her lips lightly to the ghoul's temple, feeling how cold and clammy his skin was. It sent a shudder down her spine.

As she was leaving MacCready was arriving with Shaun and Duncan. She allowed Shaun to pass her to go speak with the doctor and heard the boy's protests and disgust at his stepfather's state of being. She looked at Robert who was giving her a sympathetic, but questioning look.

"He's not looking well," she shook her head. "But, doc says he should only get better from here."

"That's good then," Robert breathed and came forward, his arm circling her. She swallowed and let her arms wrap around him. It seemed to be a common position for them: she and Robert holding each other with Duncan in one of their arms. She grinned at the idea of another baby joining this family embrace. Her hand drifted down to her stomach and she let out a shaky breath. "Do you want to go back to the house?" he asked, looking down at her.

"I want Nate to be found," she breathed.

"I know, love. Those Midwest guys are looking, they found Hancock real fast…." His hand on her rubbed her comfortingly. She tired to calm herself, but all she couldn't shake the bad feeling in the back of her mind.

When they exited the medbay and came to stand on the street another hand came to rest on her shoulder and she looked up to see Reagan. "Dire said they had a pretty good idea where the guy that took Nate was going. He had a Brahmin, so it would be easy to track them."

"He told you this when you picked up Hancock?" Madelyn lifted a brow and her friend nodded.

"Yaider and Jupiter were actually the ones to tell me, Dire went on ahead of them to check the trail by the time I got there," she gave a shrug. She trusted them, and that was enough for Madelyn.

The smaller girl nodded, "Thanks, Reagan. It means a lot that they're helping."

"Arthur is pissed, but he can't exactly order them to stop," she smirked. Madelyn nodded. "Merrin… is sorry about what happened to the ghoul, by the way," she added with a more serious look.

"Where is she?"

"With Michael at the bird. They're kind of a thing," Reagan smiled dirtily and Madelyn's brows jumped up.

"Michael and Merrin are… _together_?" That was the most surprising thing she'd heard in… a while. Merrin and Michael had always been at each other's throats and he always gave her shit for being a virgin and, of course, she shot it back and called him a man-whore. Only when she got mad, though, she was too shy even with her friends to talk to him like that since he outranked them all.

"Oh yeah," Reagan confirmed. "She smacked him with a food tray when he was being an idiot and called out Quinlan's wife and daughter…." She frowned a little then. "Probably not good to call dead people hot in general, but we all know Quinlan is a no zone with Merr." Then the knight shrugged, "I guess Lancer–Captain Kells and Quinlan had to have them apologize in front of Maxson, and on their way out he asked her on a date." Her next shrug told Madelyn she wasn't giving her all the details, but she heard enough to understand now.

"Wow, so she just had to hit him to get him interested?" Madelyn smiled a little.

"Well, I shot you," Robert chuckled, and she glanced up at him with a smile.

Reagan on the other hand gaped. "You did _what_?"

"When we first met he and Nate accidently shot at each other, both missed and Robert's bullet went through a wall to clip my arm," she explained and stepped away from Robert to turn her shoulder and show her friend the scar on her bicep.

"Y'all are weird," she frowned.

"Hey, you like some crazy shit," Madelyn countered.

"Yeah, in the bedroom, where it stays, not out in everyday life," she shook her head. "Whatever, so you going to show me around? What's there to do in this settlement? Just sitting around and waiting is driving me nuts, at least you can talk to other settlements and keep tabs on everything."

Duncan patted Robert's cheek. "Who's the big lady?"

Reagan lifted her brows. "Big lady?" she stepped forward to get a little closer. Madelyn looked her over, seeing how big she really was. Reagan stood five feet ten inches with thick bones that had ropes of muscles thickening her form. She wasn't overwhelming, but she was an intimidating person if you didn't know her well. "My name's Reagan," she informed Duncan.

"Rea–gan," he pronounced carefully. "I'm Duncan."

"Yeah," she smiled and him and ran her fingers through his auburn hair. Robert smiled between them and then looked down at Madelyn.

"Would you like to show Reagan the playground?" she asked the boy who smiled so wide his dimples pressed into his cheeks.

"Yeah!" he reached for the knight who took him immediately.

"Come on, kid," she sat him down on his feet and took his hand, having to bend some like Robert did.

"She's always been good with kids," Madelyn promised when seeing her sniper's eyes locked on the two.

"They have a lot of kids in the Brotherhood then?" he glanced back at her.

"Yeah, a lot of kids are born into it," she gestured to the knight. "Reagan's parents were a Lancer–Captain and Senior Scribe."

"'Were'?" he frowned.

"Her… mom's still around, but her dad was killed in action a couple years ago. Right before the Prydwen shipped out, actually," she swallowed. "She lost her father and Danse in the same month," Madelyn frowned and met Robert's sympathetic blue eyes. "She's strong, I don't think I've ever seen anything beat Reagan Knight."

He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and guided her toward Nate's house. When they got there Dogmeat welcomed them and they sat together on one of the General's couches, listening to the music from the radio on the table.

"I hope they find him," Madelyn whispered.

"They will," he promised and she nodded. "I just wish I was out there, I feel like I should be helping more." When she looked at him she saw his brows tugged together and tight lips turned down.

"Preston said it'd be better to have you here, incase the people taking the settlers are seen, or show up here…."

The poor Minuteman hated being in charge, she could see it in the orders he gave. He didn't want this, it was why Nate was General and not him, but he was good at delegating tasks and keeping people motivated.

There was a knock on the door, and Robert got up, leaving Madelyn with Dogmeat on the couch. She pet the dog and watched as the sniper opened the door and chuckled. "Speak of the devil. How're you, Preston?"

"I'm… fine," the young man sighed. "I… came to talk to you and Madelyn," he looked passed him to see her. "If I may?" he waved to ask for entry.

"Of course," Robert sidestepped to let him in.

The coffee skinned Minuteman came in and stood in the center of the living room, looking a bit uncomfortable as he held his hat. Madelyn hadn't seen him that much, but he'd always worn his hat, so seeing him without it now was… odd.

"What can we do for you, Preston?" Madelyn asked, feeling awkward since he and Robert were standing, leaving her as the only one sitting.

"With Nate gone… we are missing a key piece in our chain of command," he started, looking between the two of them. "I… can't step up to be General, it…" he shook his head. "I never wanted that, and I can't bring myself to do it now."

"What're you getting at, Preston?" Robert asked.

"I came to ask if one of you would step up," he looked between them. "Madelyn, I know you've just been discharged from the Brotherhood, so I understand if it's something that doesn't appeal to you right now, I also understand if the opposite's true. But I'm offering the position to either of you, _at least_ until Nate returns. But we don't… know in what condition he'll be found, so this may or may not be permanent," he added and Madelyn bit her lip, looking up at Robert.

"We'll… have to think about it," the sniper said, his brows knitting together.

"Of course," the Minuteman nodded. "I understand completely. I haven't offered the position to anyone else, so… just let me know." He put the hat back on his head and nodded to them. "I'll be on patrol."

Robert walked him out and stood beside the door, thinking.

"I… don't know how I feel about this," Madelyn said honestly. Robert nodded and came back over, stopping in front of her. "I feel like it's giving up on Nate."

"It's not giving up on him, he held an important position and he's not here to do his job. Someone has to."

"So you will?" she asked, the center of her brows arching up.

He frowned then and rubbed at the back of his neck. "I don't really like the idea of a bunch of people coming and asking me what to do."

"Me then," she blinked and he met her eyes.

"You don't have to, love," he sat down beside her and took her hand. "No one will make you. But I think it would be… good for you. You grew up in the Brotherhood, so you have the skills, and the know-how."

"I'm… so young," she breathed and her brows pulled together.

"It's only until we find Nate." He pressed forehead to hers, knocking the bills of their hats together. "You were going to be a knight, and they're in charge of people, aren't they?"

"Not really, I mean," she bit her lip. "They're just higher ranking, it doesn't really mean they have authority over anyone."

"I still think you'd be good at it," he added and she let out a sigh. "You aren't going to be doing it alone. And there's no rush."

She rubbed her face and sighed. "I need to sleep on it."

"All right," he squeezed her shoulders and kissed her cheek. "No matter what you decide, I'll support you."

Madelyn grinned and met his gaze. "That means a lot."

"We're getting married, we have to support each other." Her heart leapt. Knowing it and hearing him say it were two very different feelings.

"Are you wanting to have a wedding?"

"Are you?"

"In the Brotherhood we normally do," she shrugged. "We don't have to."

"Do you want to?" he gave her a meaningful gaze.

"I always thought I would," she confessed. "But, what girl hasn't? I'm pretty sure even Reagan's planned her wedding." He chuckled and pulled her into his lap.

"So tell me about how you imagined your wedding," he smiled at her. Madelyn shifted on his legs and rested her hands on his shoulders.

"Well…"

* * *

Madelyn woke up on Nate's couch to the sound of the door knocking. Dogmeat stood up and growled and Robert stirred before standing. "I'll get it," he whispered, giving her a kiss as he stood up. Reagan had brought in Duncan and he was asleep on the couch beside her, and didn't wake now. Madelyn ran her fingers through his hair.

Robert opened the door and Madelyn looked up to see Preston standing with his hat in his hand and Dangerfield behind him. Immediately, she stood and rested Duncan down into the couch. "Nate…?" she whispered, coming to the door.

"Dangerfield found where he was being held, at least the base where the people who took him are holding out. There's no way to know for sure what Nate's status is without going in," he frowned and Madelyn looked at the Inquisitor.

"Where is it?"

"An old Quarry, west of the Commonwealth," he answered, his brows furrowing. "It will be very, very hard to get men in there. They are dug in deep, and they have many defenses."

"You saw them?"

"They are a cannibalistic people, and they treat their prey –your settlers– like livestock," he looked disgusted, an expression that twisted his handsome face. "The sooner we get in there the more likely we will find the Sentinel alive. Though, I admit, it is highly unlikely that he is without damage, if he still breathes."

"Then what're we waiting for?" Madelyn felt her heart pounding.

"We need to rally the Minutemen behind a General and the Brotherhood needs to assemble their forces," Preston answered her.

"I'll do it, I'll be General, just… get me to Nate," she breathed and felt her jaw tighten.

Preston's gaze softened and he nodded. "Good… good," he breathed. "I'll get what men I can to assemble here. And Dangerfield's men have already taken a vertibird to the Prydwen to tell Maxson. They've suggested all troops rally at Sunshine Tidings before we head west. Once we have our numbers, we'll meet them."

"How long will this take?" Madelyn's brows tugged together.

"Four days."

"Make it three," she gritted her teeth and he nodded his understanding. "I want Nate back here on that fourth day. Home, and well."

"Yes, General."

She nodded and watched them leave. Robert turned to her and she looked up at him. "I knew you could do it," he said.

"I haven't done anything," she protested.

"You just gave your first order, and it was a damn good one, love," he tilted his head at her. "Should get some more sleep before we head out in the morning. We have some friends to get together."

"All right," she breathed and they went to Nate's bed after checking on Duncan on the couch.

* * *

A warm hand slid up Madelyn's thigh, and she stirred, arching her back as the fingers of said hand started to prod her. Her eyes flickered open only long enough to confirm it was Robert in the hazy morning light that seeped in through the cracks of the house. When her vision was darkened again, she grinned and ground herself against his touch, feeling her cheeks grow warm.

"What'd you think you're doing?" she groaned, her voice thick with sleep.

"Waking up my fiancé in the best way I can think to," came her answer, sending up cool shudders when his hot breath washed over her thigh. "She's got a long day ahead of her and I wanted to make sure she started it off good."

Her heart fluttered at the name and she bit her lip. His fingers ran over her slit and brushed her nub, shooting hot waves of pleasure through her bones. "Mmm, this is nice…"

"It's about to get better," he promised, his mouth coming down to her sex as he held her underwear out of his way. A moan slipped out from between her lips when he got her just where she liked and she twitched, her legs rubbing against him. She wasn't used to being touched like this, and he knew that, but it made her that much more cute in his eyes. "Have to stay quiet, Duncan's sleeping in the next room."

"Okay," she breathed and he pulled her panties off her.

This time when his mouth came down on her she had to pull the pillow out from under her head and press it into her face to keep the sound from growing too loud. Robert's tongue and fingers worked her, and she even in her state of inexperience, was driven wild. She didn't know if what he was doing was amateur or expert, but it was just right, and he drove her right into her release, causing her to arch her back and wrap her legs around him, holding him close.

He chuckled and kissed up her body, pulling the pillow away so that he could reach her lips. "There's that beautiful face," he smiled and she flushed.

"What now?" She felt him rub against her.

"If you'd like," he whispered, his arms around her, holding them together. He lied over her, between her legs with his arms under her, holding her shoulders and supporting himself. Her knees rested on his hips, and she whimpered a little when he ground against her again.

"Yes, please," she nearly begged and he smiled.

"It shouldn't hurt that much this time, if at all," he whispered and bent to kiss her. Madelyn raked her fingers across his back and groaned into his mouth. He rolled his hips so that his length ran along her clit, then drug back, leaving the head right above her soaked opening.

"Mmm, Robert…" she whispered and kissed him. He smiled and sucked on her lip.

Another roll and her clit sent hot shocks up her spine, causing her brain to grow fuzzy.

"Rob…"

His back arched and she felt his head part her lips. His mouth pulled from hers just enough that he could see her eyes as he slowly filled her up, pushing into her until he was in to his base. Her face contorted with pleasure, and she fought the urge to groan. And when he started to rock back and forth, withdrawing and thrusting with a perfect pattern, she fought the urge to scream her excitement.

His name fell from her lips as she arched her back in his touch. This made him smile, and he kissed her over and over, rewarding her with light nips and sucks to her exposed throat.

"Oh, Robert," she cried into his shoulder, bending to mute her pleasure against his skin.

He chuckled, "Mmm, Madelyn." He locked his fingers in her hair and she smiled when he tugged on it so that he could get to her throat again. He groaned as he moved, picking up now that he was getting close.

She arched her back and clamped down around him. It caught him off guard and he paused, his eyes rolling back causing her to giggle.

"Christ, Madelyn," he kissed her and rolled his hips, meeting his end with a lusting groan into her neck. He didn't pull out; instead, he came deep inside, and held her lovingly. "Normally this is how you make a baby," he breathed, and she smiled at him, meeting his blue eyes. "I should have been more careful last time."

"I'm not upset," she promised and touched his face, her thumb brushing over his lower lip. "I imagined it… happening differently, but I am happy all the same."

He nodded and kissed her. "Let's get cleaned up, we need to get ready for the day." Madelyn nodded and got out of the bed.

The next couple of days were a blur. How Nate had managed to handle being Sentinel and General was beyond Madelyn, she could barely keep straight all the duties she had here with the militiamen. More than once she ran off to a closet and hid herself so she could take a few deep breaths before she punched someone –namely Preston– and got herself in trouble. The last thing she needed was to be told she couldn't be General right after she'd accepted it.

Preston was helpful, but the man somehow always looked like he was… doing nothing. Like, he was doing stuff, but… not. Madelyn was about to bring it up when Robert brought Duncan to see her before he went to childcare. He was training snipers, and she was busy with an old woman by the name of Ronnie Shaw who was giving her advice over a radio since she couldn't come to the settlement –she didn't want to leave the Castle without a high ranked official.

"Hey there, precious," she smiled and scooped up the boy. Duncan wrapped his arms around her neck and she kissed him over and over. He was the perfect comfort for the mood she was being dragged into.

"How're things looking?"

"Well, I just got a complaint from Trashcan Carla that Lancer-Sergeant Glass tipped her Brahmin last night…"

"Wait, the pilot tips Brahmin?" MacCready's brows shot up.

The smallest smile pulled at her lips, but her brows furrowed. "With his vertibird."

"Oh my God, you mean to tell me that the Brotherhood go Brahmin tipping in their vertibirds?" his eyes bugged.

"Yes," Madelyn sighed and closed her eyes. "As funny as it is, now that I'm… in charge of the people who are getting their Brahmins tipped, I'm a bit pissed. She said some of her stock was ruined."

"She's being dramatic," he waved a hand dismissively. "Man you should have told me about the Brahmin tipping sooner… I may have actually joined up." He chuckled and shook his head. "Come on, pup, Maddy and I got work we need to do," he came forward and took his boy. She gave him another kiss and then looked at Robert expectantly. He grinned and bent to brush their lips together.

"I'll be home late," she frowned and he nodded his understanding.

Madelyn continued talking with Ronnie Shaw on their low-end channel, only strong radios were able to catch onto, coming to the conclusion that the Brotherhood should lead the charge as they had power armor and birds. The Minutemen would do better to follow in behind the suits and strike from a distance. Madelyn didn't know what Arthur would think of the plan; she needed to get in contact with him.

The best way to do that would be to go to the Primair and use its radio. She kicked back in her chair and rested her feet on the desk beside the radio. Her eyes were heavy. Tomorrow would be the third day, and they would be heading out, as long as she could clear her plan with Arthur and get the Brotherhood to line up with them. Then they would head out to Sunshine Tidings and meet the soldiers holding out there. Madelyn touched her forehead and swallowed against the emotion rising in her throat.

The last month had been filled with running around, and she had tried to keep her mind focused on things that weren't worrying about Nate and Hancock. It gave her a false calm. Under it all she was worrying herself sick, and she knew that wasn't good for the baby growing inside her. Her time on the Prydwen, the three weeks… _three weeks_ she'd just sat around and let Arthur handle it. Each day it got harder. She thought he would find him in a day. She should have known better.

They hadn't been looking for Hancock, they probably saw and left him.

That was like a shot to the heart, and Madelyn touched her chest. Hancock was a great man, and the Brotherhood had…. She shook her head, they'd ended up saving him, that was what was important.

Madelyn stood up and left the radio room to visit Hancock.

The ghoul was starting to stabilize. She stood beside him and took his wrinkled hand in hers, feeling his warm skin. He must be feeling better now that he wasn't cold and clammy. Lightly, she ran her fingers over his forehead.

In the dim lighting, she barely noticed his eyes peek open. "Hey there, squirt," he rasped and Madelyn's heart stopped.

"Oh, you're awake," she breathed and bent to hug him, then thought better of it and simply rested her head against his shoulder.

"Yeah," he breathed, his voice thick and broken. "Been awake for a little while. Just didn't feel like tellin' anyone," he tried to chuckle and ended up coughing.

"Shh," she smiled at him and let a few tears fall down onto her cheeks.

"You guys find Nate yet?" he breathed and her smile faded, giving him his answer. Hancock bit his lip and nodded, tears filling his eyes and Madelyn's heart broke. She never imagined the look the ghoul made, and it was the saddest thing she could have witnessed. Sorrow and heartbreak filled his features and he closed his eyes, but it pushed the tears down his cheeks. "He–He'll be all right," he whispered so softly she couldn't be sure it was actually what he said.

"We have the best people possible looking for him. We know where they took him, but we…" she cleared her throat and squeezed his hand in both of hers. "They're in a quarry, and we need to get down into it. The Minutemen and the Brotherhood are working together to get to him."

He nodded and looked at her. "I want to come."

"You're not well," she protested.

"Maddy," he narrowed his brows at her and she knew she wouldn't be able to stop him without tying him down. "I don't need to fight, I just… need to be there, for when we find him. No… matter how… we find him," he added, the tears falling freely now. He swallowed against something thick in his throat and he squeezed his eyes closed, tight and his jaw clenched.

"We'll find him alive," Madelyn promised.

"Yeah," he breathed and they were quiet for a long time. "I don't know what I'd do without him, Maddy."

"You have me," she whispered. "And Shaun," she added and wiped the salt water from his cheeks. "You have family. But we'll find him, and we'll bring him home."

Hancock shook his head slightly and let out a long breath. "The people who took him eat people, Maddy. They…" he frowned and she waited, letting him speak. "The one, Rick, he's the same one that took Nate that talked to you. We should have known, but…" Hancock shook his head. "There was something about him, something… affecting us. I think he was using a chemical of some sort, because when he wasn't close to me I didn't feel it, but…" he was struggling to explain, his face twisting in frustration. "When he got close to me I only wanted to listen to him and do what he said, but when he backed off he was any other punk I deal with in Goodneighbor."

"That's really helpful, John," she whispered and smiled at him. He looked at her when she used that name.

"I love him, Maddy, more than my own life," he told her and she nodded her understanding.

"I know, and I know he feels the same," she said and held his hand tighter. He looked at the contact and smiled at her.

"We love you too, like you're ours," he added and gave her a weak squeeze back. "Just like we love Shaun."

This brought tears to her eyes and she let out a small laugh and smiled widely at him. "I love you both too," she said and licked the tears that land on her lips.

"We have to be prepared for the worst," he breathed and she nodded. "Otherwise it'll destroy us. At least if we prepare for it, we can work through it," he brought her hand to his lips and gave her a soft kiss. "I need to rest. When are we heading out?"

"Tomorrow," she answered and he nodded.

"I'll be ready," he promised and she stood.

"We have a lot to talk about," she smiled and bent to kiss his forehead.

He nodded and gave her a grieving smile. "Tell me tomorrow on our way out."

"Okay, I'll swing back by in the morning when we get ready to leave."

"All right," he sighed and closed his eyes, settling back into the bed and Madelyn left him, a heavy weight on her shoulders.

She couldn't let him come, the trip could kill him in the state he was in, even if he didn't plan on fighting. Of course he could sit with the wounded, as they were going to have many, she was sure, but…

Madelyn made her way to Michael's Vertibird out by the Red Rocket Station, warring with herself. What if something happened to him? Nate would be so hurt. But what if Nate… and then Hancock never got to see him again?

It was too much for her to decide on her own, she would have to talk to Robert about it and see what he thought, and Preston for that matter.

"Hey there, Mads, what'd I do to earn a visit from the General of the Minutemen?" Michael crowed as she approached. He was given in a sleeping bag to spend his nights in under the cover of the garage in the Red Rocket Station. Merrin, Reagan, Dangerfield, and his knights were given the same as none of them wanted to be too far from the bird and the Bunkhouse was inside of the settlement. If something were to happen they wanted to be outside of the concrete walls. She understood, but seeing her friends sleeping on the hard concrete ground rather than in a bed made her frown.

"I need to talk to Elder Maxson," she said, deciding to sound a little more official since Michael no longer was her superior. "And I need to inform him of your tipping of one of my trader's Brahmin."

"What?" he blinked at her. "You're going to rat me out? _Really,_ Mads?"

"That's General Dangerfield, Lancer-Sergeant Glass," she corrected him and her brows frowned.

"Fuck me…" he breathed and she narrowed her eyes.

"I need to use your radio," she gestured to the bird and he sighed, annoyed, but nodded and wiped his face clean now so as to give her the respect she now demanded. "Thank you," she said when he got her connected to the Prydwen and he stepped back.

"Of course, General," he placed his fist over his chest and snapped his legs together, bowing his head slightly. "If you need anything else, just call."

When he was gone she made contact with the Command Centre of the blimp. When she confirmed who she was and requested the Elder, she was told to wait while he was fetched. It was probably twenty-two hundred hours, so he would be awake, but in his quarters handling more sensitive issues and emails. But she knew he'd come if they told him it was her.

It only took four minutes, and he was on the radio.

"General Dangerfield?"

"Elder," she breathed and smiled. "I have to discuss some strategy with you. I've spoken to my second and third, and we have come to the decision if you're willing to hear us out?"

"Of course," he sounded like he was either tired or relieved. "Whenever you're ready. The line is secure, no outside sources can catch it."

"I know," she said before she could stop herself. There was a chuckle on the other side that warmed her and she relaxed. "I miss you," she said and sighed.

"I miss you, too, puppy chow," he said quietly and she closed her eyes resisting the laugh that was fighting its way up her throat.

"Since you're more heavily armed that we and better armored, but we have an advantage at long distance, we've come to the conclusion Brotherhood forces should take point. Minutemen will back them up form around the top of the quarry and follow in behind to give support." She sat down in the pilot's seat and waited for his thoughts.

There was a long pause and she worried the plan may sound like she was trying to throw Brotherhood in front as fodder. If she hadn't just left their services on such good terms, she would have to worry about being accused of that, but Arthur knew her better than that.

"It could work," he finally said. "How steady are your sharpshooters?"

"MacCready's been training them and says they're fair. They won't take shots they aren't comfortable with when our men are down there, they will pick off the trouble makers from a distance," she confirmed, having already thought of the possibility of causing in fighting by the wrong man getting hit.

"And your foot soldiers are combat ready? We head out tomorrow," he reminded her and she nodded.

"Yes, they've been training near constantly the last forty-eight hours. Tonight they rest and we march in come day break." Madelyn let out a slow breath and tried to calm her heartbeat. She felt like a General talking to an Elder, bridging two factions rather than herself talking to her older brother.

"I have to admit, the plan is sound to me," he agreed and she relaxed. "I will be bringing the Prydwen and all the troops I planned to bring to the Midwest. Once Sentinel Walker has been retrieved and this menace has been dealt with, we will leave for the Great Waste."

"The sight of the Prydwen will make these cannibals shit themselves," she smiled and there was a quiet chuckle.

"That's the plan."

Even though she wasn't built for battle, she would be a great show of power. "I'll see you tomorrow, Artie?" she whispered.

"Of course, I'll take a vertibird to our rendezvous point so I can speak with the men there, and greet you in person when you arrive."

"I look forward to it," she cradled the com and bit her lip. She hated the distance between them. She hadn't been able to talk to him directly for almost two years and now she couldn't because she wasn't in the Brotherhood anymore. It stung in a different way. But she was happy she was at least able to hear his voice.

"Get some rest, General. We have a long couple of days ahead of us."

"Yes, Elder," she sighed and stood. "Good night, Arthur."

"Sleep well, Madelyn."

"I love you," she added and hung the com up.

"I love you, too."

* * *

Madelyn couldn't sleep, so she just lied beside Robert who was sleeping deeply, Duncan between them sprawled out so that he had a hand lying on his father's face and a leg over his side. She smiled at them and brushed Duncan's hair from his face. The green in her hair had faded some and looked odd, kind of pukey, if she washed it, it would probably return to the auburn color she and Duncan shared.

Madelyn kissed the boy's head and he stirred, rolling over with a grunt so that he was on his side, his back to Robert. As if to react to the movement, the sleeping sniper's arm reached out and ensnared the boy, pulling him back to his chest and he rested his chin on the rustled hair.

Rolling over, she came to cuddle against them, her hand resting on Robert's cheek. His eyes fluttered open, then snapped shut and he let out a soft groan. When he opened his eyes again he grinned at her. "Hey," he whispered.

"Hi," she smiled back and looked at Duncan between them.

"What is it?"

"Can't sleep."

"Ah," he nodded and bit back a yawn. "What's on your mind?"

"Everything," she breathed and sighed, closing her eyes. He reached under their boy and his hand found her cheek. She let her face rest in it with the pillow under it. "Hancock woke up, I talked to him. He wants to come with, so he can see Nate, but I don't know if it's a good idea. He's in no shape for travel, and…"

"You're worried about the state we find Nate in," he finished and she nodded.

"What if we leave him behind and Nate doesn't make it back? What if we bring him and he gets hurt or dies and then Nate doesn't get to see him again?" Her brows lifted high. They were whispering so as not to disturb Duncan, but she couldn't stop her voice from cracking at the fear of losing either or both of them.

"Hey," Robert whispered and she met his gaze in the darkness. "It'll work out, I promise. We'll find Nate, and we'll bring him home. Hancock is alive, and will stay that way. You have me, and Duncan, and," he hand over the boy came down to touch her stomach, "Our baby." She nodded closing her eyes. "You have Maxson, and your friends in the Brotherhood, and you're General of the Minutemen."

"I'm not worried about me," she whispered. "I'm worried about Nate."

"He'll tell you the same thing I'm about to," Robert breathed. "Don't worry about him. Save everyone you can and end the threat. Save the Commonwealth, not a single man."

Her heart pounded against her ribs and she nodded, tears spilling out form her eyes. "We'll save the Commonwealth _and_ Nate," she said and swallowed against the doubtful lump in her throat.


	27. Cleansing the Commonwealth

It was a trap.

They should have known it wouldn't be that easy, but even though they'd tried not to underestimate the cannibals, they were caught off guard, and it cost them greatly.

The eastern way was littered with traps: tripwires that set off fireworks with an ungodly power, exploding green chemicals in the air that rained down on the troops that set them off. This caused a reaction in the air and a radiation storm brewed, rumbling deep in the grey clouds above them. The rain that was coming down turned acidic and the air grew thick and sticky with the toxin.

The vertibirds were rendered useless before they even came into view of the quarry. Forced to land, they set off mines, killing troops and crippling the birds if not blowing them to pieces. Mines and traps took down the leading power armor ground troops, while the debris and body parts showered the foot soldiers behind them. The Brotherhood didn't break ranks, and continued forward, marching in and laying down a suppressing fire when the cannibals showed themselves, coming out of the green mist with masks and raideresque armor.

Madelyn was forced to watch from a distance, and couldn't see anything happening beyond the troops, but the distinct red glow of Brotherhood rifles and screams of the wounded told her just what was happening out of sight.

"Maddy," a soft, rough voice came from behind her, and Madelyn turned to look at Hancock who was watching from where he was strapped into the vertibird's bench seat. He wasn't allowed to move from there, and Madelyn had been advised by not only Maxson, but by Preston and Robert to stay close to him, and if nothing else, defend the bird they were in. She hated knowing Preston and Robert were out in that rad storm, soaking up radiation and possibly dying, but she wouldn't know for sure until everything was over, and that wouldn't be for a very, very long time.

"Yes?" she came to his side and knelt down.

"You should be down there fighting with them," he breathed and bit his lip. "I… I know shouldn't, but I'm going to give you something. It'll make the pain you take feel like a pinprick, and it'll make you feel like you can take on the world. You… won't even know the word fear," he shifted where he sat.

"John," she frowned when he pulled out a syringe she knew to be Psycho. "I… I shouldn't," she frowned and touched her stomach.

"One shot ain't gonna hurt ya," he promised and swallowed roughly. "I wouldn't suggest it if it would hurt you, Maddy."

"Okay," she took it and backed up a step. "I'll… I'll be back, I promise."

"General, my orders were to protect you," the lancer sitting in the pilot's chair turned and she looked between the lancers. They both looked disappointed, they would rather be fighting than babysitting, especially a ghoul.

"Protect him, because if he dies there's going to be hell to pay," she frowned at them. They shared a look, but she was already running toward the battle, hearing the cries of Brotherhood, Minuteman, and cannibal alike. Swears, victorious yells, and dying breaths.

A mine was set off beside her, throwing her sideways, and Madelyn hit the ground, landing beside a cluster of dead men. She gasped and tried to stand. Something grabbed her and she looked up to see it was a suit of power armor. Right when she felt relief, she was thrown harshly and she cried out, dropping the psycho as she hit a cliff wall. The armor came forward and lifted a laser rifle.

Another suit of Brotherhood armor came leaping forward, and threw a steel fist into the helmet, knocking it sideways. Madelyn gasped and pressed against the wall. What was happening? Brotherhood fighting Brotherhood? Had the cannibals gotten into the armor?

The second suit was knight ranked, while the one that had almost shot her was a paladin. The knight grabbed the rifle and threw it toward Madelyn. She grabbed it and held it ready while the power armor clashed loudly in a display of metal on metal wrestling. Red laser beams flashed through the air and occasionally a cannibal would step up, but both soldiers were locked in their own struggle.

It didn't take long, and the knight had the paladin down on its front. The standing power armor removed the fusion core and threw it far into the distance. Then they reached down and locked the armor closed by breaking the mechanism shut. It would take a powerful tool to open the suit back up, but the soldier would remain alive inside, and could not move. The knight looked up at Madelyn and she felt her heart pound in her chest.

"The fuck are you doing, Lynnie? I thought you were staying back at a bird?!"

Madelyn's breath left her in a relieved sigh at the sound of Reagan's voice distorted in the power armor. "I–" Maddy started and was cut off by someone coming up beside her and grabbing her laser rifle.

It was Inquisitor Dangerfield who was dressed in heavy, crudely painted black armor, and had a hand drawn Brotherhood insignia on the chest. It was blue and backwards, which confused Madelyn, but she looked back at his face, seeing that he had a gas mask from one of the cannibals covering his face instead of wearing a helmet. His steel eyes locked on her, then flicked to Reagan.

"They have a chemical that can turn you on your own men, and a sound that bends you to their will. Get back to the bird, and tell the lancers to relay this information. All suits need to be locked down to keep sound out, only the coms should remain on. And ground troops need to grab these," he gestured to the gas mask. "There's nothing you can do for the sound unless you have ear protection," he added and pointed to where she saw he had something plugged into his ear. It was a red thing linked by a wire behind the head. "It's also found on the cannibals. I cannot hear anything," he added when she opened her mouth to speak. "Go, now!" he pointed and she took off back toward the vertibird she'd come from.

That was why the paladin had attacked her, he'd been turned, and Reagan must have been informed by Dangerfield to lock out the sound in her suit so she couldn't be affected. Chemical warfare, and they had no idea. They had been given hints: the settlers disappearing with little fight. Now it seemed stupid obvious.

Madelyn ran through the battlefield and dodged the attacks coming from all sides. She barely made it back to the vertibird, and was surprised to find them already being given a mix of orders.

"Where is Maxson?" Madelyn growled and the pilot glanced at her.

"In the pit, he's been given a gas mask and ear protection, Inquisitor Dangerfield found him early on to secure him," he explained and then frowned a little. "Your men should be pulled."

"My men aren't going anywhere," she frowned and pointed at the fighting. "They're just as invested."

"All right," he sighed and she looked at Hancock.

"We should have known it was something biological," the ghoul breathed and she came to his side. "I shouldn't have given you that hit, what happened to it?"

"I dropped it," she confessed and wet her lips. "Probably a good thing, I haven't told you yet, I didn't want you to worry, but," she took a deep breath. "Robert and I are pregnant," she finally said and he blinked at her.

"Christ, Maddy, and you were going to take that Psycho? What's wrong with you?" he looked at her in shock and she nodded.

"I just… you said one wouldn't hurt, and I just–"

"I don't know what the hell it would do to a baby!" he frowned and gestured to her vaguely. "I thought you just might be nervous, I didn't realize…"

"Yeah," she looked back at the battlefield and tightened her grip on the handlebar she was holding onto. "I wish I could…"

A cannibal came running toward her with a strange gun in hand. Madelyn grabbed her ten-millimeter as he shot at her. Something stung her ears and she shook her head before firing on the man just as the pilot pulled his laser pistol and struck him in the head. He fell and Madelyn turned, looking at the pilot and then the co-pilot, feeling a wave of unease and hatred. She felt like she should shoot them before they shot her.

Madelyn wet her lips and stepped away from the bird, holding the gun up. She had half her rounds left in it.

"Maddy, what're you doing? They're on your side," Hancock said, and she looked at him. He was just trying to save his own hide, she knew. He was strapped down, there was nothing he could do, she could get the co-pilot at this angle…

"General?" Madelyn turned and nearly shot Preston in the chest, but he grabbed her wrist and pointed the gun away just as she pulled the trigger. "I'm sorry about this," he whispered and held something up to her face. When she took in a breath she smelled a sickly scent and everything went black.


	28. Ad Victoriam!

Nate could hear the fighting echoing down the hallway. He could only imagine how long it'd been going on before it got to him, he didn't know how deep he was in this 'headquarters'. Screams and weapon discharge echoed down the hallway piercing his ears and making his teeth grit together.

The door opened and snapped shut and Nate bit his lip, hoping it was a friendly face. To his surprise, it was Jacob, dressed in his blue coat and armed with a small weapon that Nate had never seen before. "Well, looks like your people are more persistent than we originally thought," he frowned and Nate's brows pulled together.

"Hiding are we?"

"More like guarding you," he shrugged. "Mother won't like if they just come in and take you," he rounded the table and pushed it against a far wall, turning Nate slightly. He was now able to look at the room a little more clearly without the light's glare.

"What's that gun you have?"

"Don't really have time for our games, Natie," Jacob sighed and sat the thing down next to his head while he went to a cabinet Nate had never been able to see.

The door fell open suddenly, getting kicked in by the boot of a power armor suit. Nate winced and tried to see who it was, but there was no way of knowing. Jacob turned around and threw his arms up.

"Help me! Those ca–cannibals!" he stammered and feigned fear well enough the suit hesitated, and then he grabbed the thing he'd pulled from the cabinet. When he fired it shot a thick projectile right into the eye or the suit, shattering the heavy glass there. Nate's brows jumped and the suit went limp but remained standing. "Christ, that was close," Jacob came back over to Nate and unlatched the belt across his neck, then the one across his stomach.

"What are you doing?"

"Going to get you out of here," he gestured to the room. "Mother needs you in the Feasting Room."

"What did you shoot that soldier with?"

"Don't worry about it," he side and stepped over to the suit. He turned the wheel that opened the armor and Jacob pulled out the Brotherhood soldier wearing it. Nate could see the nail sticking out of his eye. He swallowed and watched Jacob climb into the suit and shift around once it closed. "Always hated the idea of being in one of these," he sighed and strode over to pick up Nate and left the room.

As they went down the hallway Nate noticed they headed away from the fighting, but it seemed to follow them. A few bullets bounced off the suit, Jacob didn't seem to notice, but Nate caught one in the side, and he bent, his eyes squeezed shut. He didn't want to see his body. He knew he was missing too much of himself, and the moment he saw it it would become too real, and he'd lose it. So he kept his eyes closed and gritted his teeth against the deafening sound of battle.

"Here we are," Jacob pushed through a set of double doors in a large hallway where the smaller ones converged and came to a massive cave like area with tables lined up in an almost cafeteria fashion, a long table perpendicular to them on a raised platform. Nate was carried up to the center of the table and put down in front of the woman that called herself Mother.

"Ah, I was worried you wouldn't make it," she smiled and brushed Nate's hair from his face. He glared at her and clenched his jaw.

"From what I hear you're all about to die, why not try to escape?"

"There are only two ways in and out of our base, and both are that way," she gestured to where Nate had come from and he turned his head to look at the door that Jacob closed and locked. Then he parked the armor in front of it, causing the heavy suit to act as a barricade.

When Jacob came back he ran his fingers through his black curls and stood beside the woman. "They'll be here any moment, Mother."

"Go ahead and get me one last piece of him," she gestured to Nate and Jacob nodded, turning around to tend to something out of Nate's sight. The Sentinel met the woman's bloodshot brown eyes and glared at her heavily.

"You sure you'd rather spend your last moments eating me? I think Jacob would like some quality time with you. Boys get horny when they know they're about to die," he said and she narrowed her eyes at him.

"Do you wish for us to just kill you, Nathaniel?"

"I don't think you understand that you've already done that," he answered and nodded toward his body, his eyes locked on her face. "I will never be able to live like this."

"Don't be so dramatic," she sighed and sat down in the chair beside him. She was messing with a device that looked like a recorder, though why she would have one of those he couldn't be sure.

Nate felt his breathing coming in harsh pants. Other people were joining in the room, sitting in chairs on either side of the woman. The Sentinel could hear something beating against the door now, and wondered if it was cannibals looking for sanctuary or if it was Brotherhood and Minutemen forces.

"I'm not being dramatic. You took from me the only things that keep people alive in this world. I might have been able to make a life for myself before the war, but not in this place, not in this hell," his lips pulled back over his teeth and he glared the heaviest, most hateful look he'd ever given anyone. The woman leaned back some, seeming to be affected by the stare, if just slightly.

"The fire is ready, what part of him did you want, Mother?" Jacob came back into view and looked him over.

She thought for a moment and sat the recorder down in front of her. "Get me a couple ribs," she decided. Jacob nodded and stepped up to Nate.

"Sorry, don't have time for you to go to sleep for this one," he frowned and Nate sucked in a breath, feeling the clothing he wore be pulled away from him. Then a knife was produced and Nate closed his eyes. "I'd hold still if you want this to hurt as little as possible," Jacob advised and then plunged the dagger into Nate's side, into his ribs to break the bone.

The sound that left Nate was muted by the shattering sound of the door being shoved open and the abandoned power armor falling to the floor. The General tried to look at the forces that came through, but the pain in his side blurred his vision and it took all his efforts not to black out. Jacob was still cutting him, but the sizzle of laser rifles on flesh filled the air, mixing with the cry of the wounded.

It came to a sudden stop when Mother fell over and Jacob bent down behind Nate. Looking up at the ceiling, Nate took a deep breath and regretted it, feeling the severe pain in his side.

"Sentinel?!"

The power armor distorted voice was vaguely familiar, but Nate couldn't place it. Especially not now with his head swimming. Jacob perked up, though.

"Knight? Reagan… Knight?" the cannibal with the icy blue eyes grinned, standing up with his hands in the air. "I never would have thought you were the one to find me."

Nate tried to look, the doorway was open with a suit of power armor in front of another soldier he couldn't make out well. The suit was Knight Knight? The woman who came to speak with him about Paladin Danse? He wouldn't have guessed she would be the one to find him, but, at least it was someone familiar to him, if not just in passing.

"J–Jacob…?" her voice wavered, and even Nate could tell that they had a history that did not end well for her.

"You didn't seriously think I could die in a vertibird crash, did you?" he grinned at her and put his hands down, one of them finding the knife in Nate's side. In response, the Sentinel groaned in agony and arched his back slightly, only to cause himself more pain.

"Leave the Sentinel and you will be taken in for trial and judgment under Elder Maxson," Knight demanded and lifted her rifle.

"Oh no, Maxy won't let me off, we both know that. I'll be sentenced to death, so why bother?" he twisted the knife. "If you want the Sentinel alive, you should put that down, Reagan…"

Nate tried to look over at the knight, but it hurt to move.

"Why didn't you come back to us? Why would you join these…?"

"I was finally free of my father, Reagan, I was offered a new life," he smiled and gestured around. "One you've destroyed, but these last two years have been great. I got to do _whatever the hell I wanted_! I didn't have to please my father, I didn't have to worry about tainting the family name!" He threw his arms up and then gestured beside him where the woman called Mother had fallen out of Nate's view. "And you've gone and killed the only family that loved me."

"What of Michael? And Robert? Your brothers love you," the knight stepped forward and Jacob twisted the knife in Nate's side causing him to cry out.

"Don't move, Reagan, and keep that hound of yours on a tight leash," he pointed, and Nate wondered if the person with her was one of these 'Midwest hounds' he'd heard so much about.

"Don't kill him, Jacob, if you do you lose your leverage and you die," she took a step forward and the knife twisted again.

"Reagan, dear, I'm already dead. I was dead the moment my vertibird crashed. When Mother found me and offered to heal my broken legs in exchange for my help," he grinned, but it wasn't the attractive smirk he'd used before, this one was that of a man who had lost his will to live. "She only ever asked one thing of me, and that was to kill and eat my co-pilot to show her I was devoted. Weird how easy it was for me to do it," he tilted his head at her and Knight said nothing.

"Lancer-Sergeant Glass, you are sentenced to death under the authority given to me by Elder Dangerfield of the Midwest Brotherhood of Steel," a man's voice came and a sharp crack of a sniper rifle echoed through the room, and Jacob fell away from Nate.

Who was Elder Dangerfield? There was a Midwest Brotherhood?

Nate's head swam, and he knew he was losing too much blood. Between blinks there was nothing above him, and then the knight's face with wide honey eyes and yelling lips. He distantly heard her, and he blinked again, this time when he looked he met the gaze of a man with steel eyes and a freckled face.

He could hear a little better now, and he realized he'd been given a stimpak. "Who…?" Nate breathed, and the knight stepped back forward.

"This is Inquisitor Dangerfield," she said and offered him a comforting smile. "Do you remember me, Sentinel?"

"Knight Knight," he breathed and she nodded.

"We'll get you out of this, sir," she said and he started to slowly shake his head.

"I'm… I've reached my end… Knight," he sighed and she blinked at him.

"We have another stimpak, your bleeding has stopped, sir."

"It was too late," his voice was soft and weak. "I think he… got my…." His chest hurt and he knew that he was still dying. It was either poison or he'd been struck in the heart and the stimpak wasn't enough.

"Dire, get the other stimpak," she turned to the man and he didn't move.

"Reagan," he said softly and Nate closed his eyes, knowing that the man knew just as he did that he wouldn't last much longer. "The only comfort we can offer him is a quick death."

"Madelyn… she'll–" Knight looked back at him and frowned, sadness and disapproval coating her face. "She'll be devastated… and the ghoul…"

"Tell them both how much I love them. Maddy… You need to tell Maxson I think she is ready to be promoted. I can only assume she'll be eased into battle, but she needs it, and despite everything, she deserves it. And… John," he felt a lump rise in his throat and he bit his lip. "I know it's a lot to ask of you, but please tell him he means the world to me, that I'm so sorry I couldn't see him again, and that I love him more than I can express. I… I wish I could see him one more time…."

"They're both outside, in the back outside the fighting, safe," Knight's jaw was tight, but Nate was slipping, and the three of them knew it. He was in too much pain, and his face twisted to show it.

"The distance is too great," the man frowned at the knight. "He will not make it, and if we move him he will only suffer more."

Knight closed her eyes in frustration, but finally nodded. "Is there anything else? Anyone else you want us to relay a message to?"

"My boy, Shaun, tell him I love him, and that I wish I could be there to watch him grow up, and…" he cleared his throat, but it took a lot of effort. "Tell him no matter what, I always loved him, and that I hope he can forgive me."

Knight nodded and looked at the man who nodded that he remembered his words.

"And… MacCready," Nate breathed. "Tell him to take care of Madelyn, that she deserves the best, and I know he can give it to her."

Knight had tears in her eyes, and smile faintly. "They're with child, Sentinel. Madelyn and the mercenary."

Nate felt his heart lighten and he smiled, but pain twisted it. "Good, they will make great parents."

"Maxson gave her an honorable discharge, and she leads the Minutemen," the woman explained and Nate felt his pain lessen.

"She will do great things, I know it," he said and nodded. "And she will be a better General to them than I could be."

"Don't say that, Sentinel," the knight frowned and he shook his head just slightly.

"It's all right." Nate closed his eyes and relaxed, feeling the end nearing, but it was slow, and agonizing. "Knight Reagan Knight, would you do me the greatest favor I could ever ask?"

"Yes, Sentinel."

"Please kill me," he whispered. "Sort of fitting that you be the one to do it, seeing that you had the intent originally…." He tried to laugh, but there was no humor in it.

"Yes… Sentinel."

Nate heard the laser rifle's hum, and felt the cold barrel press to his temple. He took in a slow breath and kept his eyes tightly closed. "John, I love you," he whispered and for a moment, he felt the comforting heat of the laser penetrating his skull.


	29. Spoils of War

When Madelyn opened her eyes she was lying on a bed in Sanctuary with light streaming in brightly from the outside. The room was the same one that Hancock had been placed in when he was brought to Sanctuary, but she wasn't hooked up to the same things as he had been.

Madelyn sat up and glanced around. "Hello?" she called and noticed her voice was hoarse. She couldn't remember anything after seeing Reagan and Dangerfield.

Robert came around the corner quickly and met her gaze. His eyes were heavy and red rimmed with pain. Something bad had happened, and she was pretty sure she knew what it was.

"Nate…?"

His jaw clenched and he came to her side, that was all the answer she needed. Tears spilled from her eyes and she grabbed hold of him tightly when he sat next to her. "Your friend, Reagan, found him, his arms and legs had been completely removed and by the time she got there he'd been…. She couldn't save him," he squeezed her tightly as she sobbed into his shoulder.

She couldn't say anything for a long time, and Robert held her. Thoughts raced through her, how things could have happened differently. What could she have done to change the outcome, to save Nate?

It took a long time for her to be able to speak. "What… about John?" she whispered between breaths.

"He's… fine, considering," he answered and cupped her face in his hands. "Do you want to go see him?"

"What happened to me?"

"You were hit by one of their… mind control guns, and Preston knocked you out to keep you from hurting someone you'd regret," he frowned. "You were going to shoot Hancock."

She flinched at his words and vaguely remembered the event. "I want to see John," she said and he nodded, helping her out of bed. "How long was I out?"

"Just a day," he guided her out of the clinic and she caught a glimpse of the over flowing amount of Minutemen soldiers in the recovery bay in different states of health. More were put up in the front room that was normally a waiting area, and as they stepped outside, she saw tents set up and more men.

"Oh my God," she breathed and touched her mouth.

"They didn't even do most of this damage," Robert breathed and she looked at him with wide eyes. "They did it to each other…" he frowned and she wondered if he'd hurt anyone he didn't mean to. Based on how he stared at the ground, that was a yes.

She held his hand tightly and they walked up the street to Nate's metal home. Faintly she wondered if John would stay there, or if he would move. Her heart felt heavy, and she decided she would keep her thoughts on John and Shaun.

A few people stopped them to check on her, she had all but forgotten she was the General, and now that seemed to be a permanent thing. She didn't want it to upset her, but with that thought came thinking of Nate, and she couldn't bring herself to think of that at the moment. She just wanted to walk into that metal house at the end of the circle and open the door to see John handing Nate a beer while he sat on his couch, relaxing with an arm around Shaun reading a comic.

When Robert knocked on the door there was a long pause, and she glanced up at him, but he just stared, waiting. A lump rose in her throat, and she tried to swallow against it, but the door opened and her heart fell to the ground.

John stood in a loose blood stained button up and baggy pants without his hat on his bald head. His black eyes were narrowed and puffy, and she knew if they wouldn't have been solid they would have been red from crying. He looked horrible with a look of pain plastered to his pale face. When he looked at her he dropped his arms to his side and stepped forward, grabbing her in a tight hug.

Robert took a step back and she grabbed hold of the ghoul, tightly, her face burying into his chest and they both shook with sobs. She knew his loss was greater than hers, she had only known the Sentinel for months while John had known him, loved him, for years. Between them Madelyn had only lost a friend, a fatherly figure who she had only just started to grow attached to. John had lost his lover. The person he planned on spending the rest of his life with, but that had been cut short.

"Where is he?"

"On the bed."

Both of their voices were barely anything more than a breath, and were hushed by the pain they shared. Madelyn walked with John into the bedroom, past Shaun lying on the couch with his face buried in a pillow. Robert knelt beside him and rubbed his back while Madelyn turned the corner.

The smell of blood and death hit her first, and then she saw him, sitting on the bed as if he were sleeping. He was resting on top of the covers, dressed in ragged clothes that looked like they'd been put on him only to be removed. He was missing both arms and legs all the way to the shoulder and hip joints, which were bandaged up with bloody rags. His face was calm, his lips slightly parted and his eyes closed, but his tanned skin was sickly pale, and his hair was disheveled. She pulled away from John to sit on the bed beside him and touch his cheek. When she did this she shuddered, feeling how cold it was. The right side of his head had been vaporized by a laser rifle set to a low setting and shot in close proximity, she could tell because she'd seen it in books about executions in Quinlan's office. Her heart hammered away in her chest as she looked down at the wound in his right side. It hadn't been bandaged up, but it had been midway through healing when he'd died so the bleeding had been stopped. It looked like a knife wound.

Madelyn looked up at John who came around to sit on the other side of the bed. "The knight found a recorder that was on during…" he swallowed and picked up a holotape and Nate's PipBoy. "It has his last words…" he whispered and pressed the yellow object into the player.

 _"_ _Don't be so dramatic," a woman's voice came through and the sound of the recorder being moved scratched through. The background was filled with movement creating a muted din._

Hancock frowned and skipped forward in the recording, and Madelyn resisted telling him not to. She could only imagine how many times he'd listened to it already.

 _"_ _I'm… I've reached my end… Knight," Nate's voice came through._

 _"_ _We have another stimpak, your bleeding has stopped, sir," Reagan said desperately._

 _"_ _It was too late," Nate's voice was soft and weak. "I think he… got my…."_

 _"_ _Dire, get the other stimpak."_

 _"_ _Reagan," the Inquisitor's voice was soft. "The only comfort we can offer him is a quick death."_

 _"_ _Madelyn… she'll–" her voice was thick with sorrow and disappointment. "She'll be devastated… and the ghoul…"_

 _"_ _Tell them both how much I love them. Maddy… You need to tell Maxson I think she is ready to be promoted. I can only assume she'll be eased into battle, but she needs it, and despite everything, she deserves it. And… John…. I know it's a lot to ask of you, but please tell him he means the world to me, that I'm so sorry I couldn't see him again, and that I love him more than I can express. I… I wish I could see him one more time…."_

Madelyn swallowed against the lump in her throat. Had he died without knowing all that happened while he was away? She couldn't believe she hadn't been there with Reagan….

 _"_ _They're both outside, in the back outside the fighting, safe," Reagan's voice was strained._

 _"_ _The distance is too great," Dangerfield said softly. "He will not make it, and if we move him he will only suffer more."_

 _There was a pause. "Is there anything else? Anyone else you want us to relay a message to?"_

 _"_ _My boy, Shaun, tell him I love him, and that I wish I could be there to watch him grow up, and…. Tell him no matter what, I always loved him, and that I hope he can forgive me. And… MacCready," Nate breathed. "Tell him to take care of Madelyn, that she deserves the best, and I know he can give it to her."_

 _"_ _They're with child, Sentinel. Madelyn and the mercenary," Reagan told him._

Madelyn felt a small wave of relief wash over her and she pressed her face into her hands.

 _"_ _Good, they will make great parents."_

 _"_ _Maxson gave her an honorable discharge, and she leads the Minutemen."_

 _"_ _She will do great things, I know it," he said. "And she will be a better General to them than I could be."_

 _"_ _Don't say that, Sentinel."_

 _"_ _It's all right…. Knight Reagan Knight, would you do me the greatest favor I could ever ask?"_

 _"_ _Yes, Sentinel."_

 _"_ _Please kill me," he whispered. "Sort of fitting that you be the one to do it, seeing that you had the intent originally…." He seemed to try to laugh, but there was no humor in it._

 _"_ _Yes… Sentinel."_

 _There was a click of a laser rifle's settings being adjusted and then the hum of its idle. "John, I love you," Nate whispered._

Then the discharge sent static through the speakers and Madelyn flinched.

 _"_ _I… I can't believe I did that," Reagan whispered._

 _"_ _You gave him a quick death, you saw how much pain he was in, Reagan." There was a moment of silence and then the recorder was moved. "This has been on since we got here," the Inquisitor said and the recording turned off._

Madelyn felt a weight on her heart as she looked at John who was staring at Nate's face. She got up and walked around the bed to his side. "We'll bury him, up on the hill beside Danse and his wife…"

John nodded and looked up at her with wet eyes. "Can… I have a moment? I know you haven't… but I…"

"Of course," she kissed his head and gave him one more tight squeeze, prompting them both back into tears. Then she left the room and found Robert standing by the back door looking into the yard. She walked over and peered into it to see Dogmeat lying on the ground beside Duncan. The boy wasn't alone, there was Nick the synth and Piper the reporter both looking grieved as they watched the boy. "He's really gone…."

"Yeah," Robert frowned and looked back at her. "But now the Commonwealth is safe from another threat."

She nodded and pressed her forehead against his chest, letting him engulf her as she tried to think about everything but Nate's cold body in the next room.


	30. Liberty Reprimed

The turnout for Nate's funeral was overwhelming; Brotherhood, Minuteman, and civilians alike crowded the hilltop. The grave they made for him was just like Nora's and Danse's with a stake in the ground and a horizontal plank reading 'General/Sentinel Nathaniel Walker'.

Maxson had promised to have three graves made from stone, so they would last through time, and each was given a loving phrase under their names. He kept his word and the stones were finished mere days after the funeral, and after they were put in place, the East Coast Brotherhood headed west for the Great Waste, leaving behind small bases throughout the Commonwealth.

Nate's holotags and sniper rifle were added to the collection of items he had stacked in Shaun's nursery in his prewar house, and the grounds were planned to be fenced in to keep people out of it so it would remain as he left it.

Hancock decided to remain in the house he and Nate had, and made plans to build Shaun a bedroom off of the back door so that no structural changes would be made to the building. He also wanted to get rid of one of his beds so that he only had the one.

Madelyn and Robert made plans to build a house on the foundation next to Hancock's metal home, so they were close. It would be finished before their child was born, and had three bedrooms, and an open concept kitchen-living room set up that Madelyn adored.

Life after Nate Walker proved to be just as it had before him, but all those who knew him felt the void that he left. He changed so much by doing what he thought was so little. He affected everyone he met, and most never got to tell him how much he meant to them. He died on a cold table in a pool of his own blood, missing his limbs, and the only company he had were all but strangers.

Madelyn didn't think she could ever forgive herself, just as she knew that Hancock wouldn't be able to either. But they moved on, after the pain was depression, and after that was acceptance.

By the time Madelyn was ready to give birth the pain of Nate's death had finally seemed to fade into sadness and longing. John and Robert were with her while she spent seven hours in the Brotherhood base at Cambridge Police Station, pushing out an eight-pound baby girl.

The medic handed over the girl and Robert slid his arm in behind Madelyn so that he could look at their baby. She screamed and cried, but Madelyn smiled at the miniature human in her arms. "She's perfect."

"Of course she is," John smiled and bent to look over at the baby. "What will you name her?"

"What was Nate's middle name?" she looked up at John, and he blinked.

"Uh, Eric," he breathed and she nodded, smiling.

"Erica MacCready," she tilted her head to confirm with Robert who nodded and kissed her damp hair. Madelyn held her baby and stared at her while John retrieved Duncan who sat in the bed beside her and stared at Erica with wide eyes.

"That's my little sister?" he asked and Madelyn nodded, smiling at him.

"Her name is Erica."

"Erica," he pronounced carefully and smiled up at Madelyn before gently reaching out to brush at the tuft of pale hair on her head. She quieted her cries then, and looked around, her eyes a steely-blue, like Maxson's, Madelyn noted, but she knew that could change as she grew.

"She'll need you to protect her, Duncan, you're her big brother," Robert said, tilting his head at the boy and he nodded, smiling eagerly. "

"Can I hold her?"

"In a little bit, let her and mommy rest," Robert got up and came around to pick up the boy. "We'll go get you something to eat."

When they left Madelyn looked at John. "Would you like to hold her?"

"Could I?" he whispered and stepped forward, gingerly taking the bundle from her mother. He smiled down at the baby girl and Madelyn thought she saw tears come to his eyes. "He would have loved to have met her, Maddy."

"I know…."

"He wouldn't have missed this for the world," he signed and shifted the baby gently to lay the softest kiss against her forehead.

"He would have been a great grandpa," she smiled at the ghoul. "Just as you will."

"Hah, never thought I'd hear that," he chuckled and cradled the child close as he swayed back and forth. "Just call me gramps," he said to the baby and Madelyn laughed lightly.

"Be careful, she'll remember that."

"I count on it," he smiled. "You should get some rest," he commented and she nodded.

"You'll watch her?"

"Of course, and MacCready'll want to hold her I'm sure," he smiled and bent down to kiss her hair. "Sleep, Maddy."

"Okay," she breathed and let her eyes drift closed. A calming sleep came over her, and Madelyn let a smile ghost across her lips as she drifted off.

* * *

 **And that's it! Thank you so much for reading! It means the world to me. I am sorry for anyone who is upset with how Nate died, but not everyone gets an ideal death, and I decided to give Nate a pretty shitty one. It killed me to write it. I will begin posting Reagan's side of this story and then her going to the Midwest with the Brotherhood here soon, so if you're interested, just check out my profile! Thank you so much for sticking with Nate and Madelyn through their journey! I love you all!**


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